AN: I'm honestly not the best fan of first person POV stories. In my opinion not many people do them right and get the feel of the character right. I think it highly limits the author to a box of what your character knows and forces you to ignore the world around the character and the larger picture. As a narrator or sorts the author has much more freedom I think and the world is more open to you. That being said, there are some people who do write a good 1st person POV and really get into the character's head and feelings and really show us what's in there, to those I say thank you. Regardless of my personal feelings about 1st person POV I wanted to give it a try merely as a writing exercise and to stretch my boundaries a bit. I don't think this is the greatest thing if ever written at all and don't even think is that great either, but my beta likes it and my test reader did as well so now I'm going to put it here and ask you to let me know what you think. It is highly unlikely you will see another 1st person POV from me any time soon so if it sucks don't worry I'm sticking to what I do best anyways.

Betaed by fifteenfeb

I don't own Finder Series.

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The First

Sometimes memories like your first love, are best left as such and never pursued with. They are beautiful, innocent and perfect and sometimes reality does not measure up to them or you find that the reality is much more different than what you thought. If I had left it alone and not moved by curiosity, my memories of her would have stayed as such and I would not have come to such a startling realization. If I had left it alone, the mirage of my perfect first love would not have crashed before my very eyes.

She had been my first crush, my first love, or so I thought. We met during my second year of middle school and became good friends. For the longest time, I was too shy to ask her out. By the time I had finally gathered the courage to confess, she had moved to a different city with her family because her dad had transferred jobs. I never saw her after that, never even heard her name again until I walked into the office building following one of my colleagues from the magazine. He would be doing the interview and I would be taking the pictures.

That's when I saw her, she had changed so much over the years but her kind smile and lovely eyes were still the same. I did not recognize her at first, her looks were so different now and she had changed into a beautiful she introduced herself and when she said her name and smiled as she led us to the office, all the pieces fell into place in my mind and an image of her face which I had not thought about for a long time was conjured by my memory.

"My name is Kunagara Shiroka, I'm Yume-san's personal assistant. Please follow me to the office where the interview will be conducted."

I wasted no time in asking her if she was the same Kunagara Shiroka who attended my school. She was thrilled to have met in such an unexpected way and we made plans to meet up at a restaurant and catch up with each other's lives and reacquaint with each other.

That was three days ago, today I was going to meet with my first love and would get to see what could have been.

I walked into the restaurant, nothing too fancy because I could not, in all honesty, afford it and was already stretching it far with this one as it was. She was already there, sitting at the table, sipping on a glass of wine and she was beautiful. I felt a momentary pang of guilt because I had lied to Asami, telling him I had to finish some details from the interview before it got published, but the truth was that I needed to know and did not want Asami to interfere.

We talked and she flirted with me when she pointed out neither of us was married yet. It looked like a date, as we laughed at shared memories, but to me, it did not feel as such. Through the whole ordeal, I kept feeling like something was missing from it all, though I had no idea what it was.

My mind kept wondering to the fact that it was Sunday afternoon and Asami would be coming home early, then it would focus on how if I went home soon, I would be able to spend some time alone with him.

The more my mind wandered to Asami, the more a warm feeling spread all over my body. I had felt it before but had always decided to ignore it. But now, sitting in front of the first person I had ever loved, I realized something. What I felt for her was never even close to what I feel every time those piercing golden eyes crossed my mind. I realized that even though I thought I had been in love with her, it had never truly been anything more than a child's crush and perhaps that was why I was never able to confess, because subconsciously, I knew it was not real. That in and of itself brought another realization that hit me right on the head like a ton of bricks.

She was never my first love, Asami was.

And here I was in a restaurant with her when I would rather be making some homemade traditional food the way he likes and waiting for the condo's door to open when he comes home from work.

I was glad we had not ordered yet, it would be a shame if we had because in all honesty, I hate to waste food and I much preferred to be having dinner with the perverted bastard.

"I'm sorry." I said, when she touched my hand and smiled flirtatiously at me. "It is true that I'm not married, but I'm in a committed relationship. I should go, thanks for catching up but I have to go home now."

She looked confused and I guess that was my fault. But all I could think about at the moment was the fact that if I made it to the train station in five minutes, I could be home before Asami and would be able to greet him when he comes home.

So I left, practically running in my cheap suit, to make it in time to the station and hopefully being able to catch that train. I went home; to the home I share with my first love, the home I share with Asami. I cooked his favorites and lay the table with the varied spread of traditional foods. He would be home in less than five minutes and a kind of nervousness I had never experienced before filled me. Time went so fast that before I realized it, the door was already opening and he was walking in. He looked at me with a quizzical brow as he took in the table and all the food on it, I'm sure he had already heard I had bolted from the restaurant and would surely ask me why. He chuckled then, as if he already knew what was going on and exactly what happened and I could not help the blush I could feel creeping up my face. I also could not help the way I smiled at him as I walked into his arms and surrounded his waist with mine, or the kiss I set upon his lips right before I looked into his eyes and said "Welcome home."

Maybe I'll tell him tonight, if he doesn't act like a self-righteous bastard, maybe I'll tell him that he was my first in more than one thing.

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So, how was it? Hopefully even a bit entertaining…

Anyways, as I was writing yesterday afternoon I was double-checking some facts on Akihito's background for a oneshot I'm writing and came across some interesting (at least to me) stuff. Did you know the seiyuu for Akihito does the opening song for Fairy Tail and Okane Ga Na? I had no idea and I like the opening for Fairy Tail and he even does the voise for Natsu!… maybe is its cause I have not been paying attention to such things as of late. On that note, Asami's seiyuu does the voice for Johnny Rico for Starship Troopers Invasion of all things (I'm a big Scifi lover) I think it makes me love him more than I did before lol.

Now for more important stuff

I know that I'm supposed to update Host next… and I will. But it honestly aint going anywhere at the moment so that might be a bit yet. On the other hand WAR! Practically writes itself and fifteefeb was a wonderful help with that, seriously, I already knew what I wanted to do with Aki and had no idea what to do with Kirishima but she came up with just the most perfect thing that totally fits what he would have put Aki through. So in essence I have the whole thing planned now and even have several big chunks, it would be just a matter of putting them in order and filling the gaps and the chapter would be done. I so want to post that chapter but I think it would be unfair for those waiting for the update in Host if I jump that fic to update WAR! So for those waiting for WAR! As much as I want to update it, you are going to have to wait until Host is up and that might be a bit. In the mean time I'm working on 2 other oneshots apart from this one to tie you over.

Setsuna