I WASN'T SUPPOSED TO POST THIS BUT A PUNY FRIEND OF MINE FORCED ME TO OR ELSE I'M GONNA SING "LET IT GO" IN FRONT OF SO MANY PEOPLE.
But, whatever. The song belongs to Jason Mraz, obviously not mine. ;) Enjoy reading! :P
I will never ever give up on you, Karai. No way. I'll find a way for you to turn back into normal again. I promise.
Leo continued to stare at the spot where Karai dived in. The dull seawater reflected his devastated face, and the cold breeze brushed through his terrapin skin, making the tails of his bandana flutter with the wind. He held the steel railing with a tight force, as he remained immobile.
He shut his eyes tightly, as tears fell from his eyes, flowing down through his cheeks down to the seawater. He was completely broken, deep down to his soul. After the entire chase, all the screams and all those months, they were all for nothing. The retro mutagen they all pledged their trust didn't help. Perhaps, their quest to save Karai was really just impossible. Perhaps, this was the right time to accept the fact that, he was all useless; nothing but a body of failure.
Leo could hear his brother's voice from his back, telling the rest of the team to go back to their temporary shelter and plan for their next attack for the two new mutants there. He wasn't really paying attention because his gaze was fixed on the water. He wanted to dive in also, but there is no way he would leave his team behind; unless he loses his sanity. He stood there for almost like forever, until Raphael grabbed his wrist and told him to move. He shook himself out of the tears and raised his head, plastering his 'leader face', just to conceal from his brothers and friends all of his burden and carry them alone.
While they all took the way out of the Coney Island circus, he paused for a while and clenched his fists on his both sides. He couldn't just leave, not if they already had Karai on their palms. She was so near; all they had to do was to convince her and take her to the temporary lair, but why... Why didn't she come? Why did she say goodbye? Was she really giving up, and letting her snake mind overpower her? Leo doubted it. He couldn't let it happen. The Karai he knew was fierce and feisty. She would never give up, Leo knew it. She never did, ever; and neither did he.
Leo found himself running towards the place where they last saw Karai. His brothers didn't have the chance to stop him, for he wasn't listening. The blue clad turtle's mind was all concentrated to Karai, and he literally didn't hear his brother's shouts, who were trying to stop him. The only thing in his mind was to run, and find Karai.
He felt a tight grip around his wrist, a hand on his shoulder and several arms around his neck, forcing him to stop. But he was too desperate. Instead of stopping, he growled like an angered animal and raised both of his arms, as he shook the grips out of his way. He threw them from afar with an incredible strength and he continued to run. Even his brothers and friends couldn't understand. They were also letting go of the chance to save Karai. How could the world not understand?
His eyes were narrowed and his speed was immeasurable. The other turtles watched as their eldest brother was running, and completely losing his sanity. He was all broken; but he was just a teenager. The pressure was too much for him to handle, so his whole being finally gave up. The turtles, April and Casey didn't hesitate to follow him, even though they all already had experienced his wrath. They all called his name out loud, trying to gain his attention, which constantly failed.
Leo finally stopped, as he reached the steel railing at the edge. He bursted into tears as he screamed. "Karai! I know you can hear me! Please, stay with us! You're safe, just please come with us! Karai!" He yelled and yelled, until he got tired. His brothers couldn't do anything to calm their leader; they just stood there, all of them were crying like him. They stayed idle, like waiting for the world to crumble.
"Karai...please..." Leo sobbed violently, as he slowly closed his eyes. He collapsed from where he stood, and continued to sob, almost endlessly. Raph attempted to run to him, but he was halted by Donnie. The purple clad shook his head slowly and motioned Raph to stay. As expected, the red clad didn't want to be told what he's gonna do, so he refused and rushed towards Leo.
"I will not stay and watch here doing nothing!" Raph shook his brother's hand and glared at them. He quickly went to his agonizing brother, as he gritted his teeth.
"What are you doing here, Leo?! Have you lost your mind?! She will not come back! She's all gone, for the best!"
Leo slowly turned to his raging brother, his eyes had swollen. "How can you be so sure that she's gone? She's still alive, as we all saw her. I know that Karai wanted to turn back," He was on the ground, all wet with his own tears. His voice was raspy, and the way he spoke to Raph, they could say that he clearly lost his mind. He couldn't be blamed for this; he was too young to carry all of these. He had the large responsibility as the leader of the team, he was expected to be as intact as possible. At any angle, being a leader itself, already was a knife stuck in his shell.
Raph saw all the pain inside his brother's eyes, although he wasn't good at feeling other's emotions. By just staring at those dark blue eyes of sorrow, he was almost feeling the same pain Leo was tackling all by himself. If only Raph could carry some of the heavy luggage from Leo, he would've done it already from the start; but he didn't know how. He didn't know how to comfort others -it was Leo's job- and he didn't know how to understand this kind of situation. He really felt bad for his dearest brother, but he didn't know how to show his concern. What kind of brother was he?
"Leo..." Raph said with the softest voice he could muster. He sat down in front of his crazed older brother, and tried to reach out a hand, for him to touch him. He could see that his hand was trembling, but it didn't matter, as long as he could lay a single finger at his brother.
Unfortunately, Leo flinched and gritted his teeth. "What are you going to say?" Leo stood up and reached a hand on one of his swords. "Tell me that I should give up? Huh?! Is that what you all want?! Leave a friend?! A member of the family?!" He pointed the tip of his sword at his brothers, then down to Raph. "I was right, wasn't I? That you really don't care about Karai!"
The two youngest turtles took a step forward and vigorously shook their heads in disapproval. "No way, Leo. You know that we all care." Donnie said, glancing at each one of them.
"Come on, Leo. That's why we are all here, to save Karai." Mikey said, while twiddling his fingers and his eyes were fixed at the ground.
Leo placed his hand down and back to his side, still holding the katana. He closed his eyes and breathed out, a signal of him trying to get calm. "Why... Why didn't she come with us then?!" He turned his back and sliced the steel bar into several pieces. He panted, as he kneeled down. "Karai! Please!" He shouted once more, and cried. His heart had too much. He had been in a comatose for three months. Shredder stole those days from him, and he was the cause of all of this chaos. How dare he to steal Karai, or Miwa from Splinter? How dare he to involve the innocents to this turmoil? Now, everyone suffered. Now, Karai was slowly turning into a complete hideous snake, she didn't want to be. Now, Splinter was depressed because of her loss.
Leo couldn't hide the anger against the root of all of these. He wished that Shredder was...was dead. He wished that he could slice him up already, just like the pieces of metal on his front. Karai was so dear to him, that he couldn't sleep without formulating a plan to save her. She was really special. In other words, he loved her so much. No matter how many times she tried to stay away from him, from them, he still loved her. He wouldn't let her suffer at the rough hands of that evil Shredder again; he must find a way.
But how could he do that? Karai herself refused to go with them. Leo would take all the risk for bringing Karai to their temporary lair. If she would end up rampaging around, he would stop her with all his strength and power. If she would try to eat Splinter out of instinct, he would do his very best to return her mind. If she would bite him, then so be it. At least she would be there with them. Nothing is dangerous from a strong will. But as of now, Karai was nowhere to be found. She left them with empty hands.
Leo cried out loud, despite of his voice, slowly disappearing like a mist. He couldn't do anything. He was a total failure.
"LEO! SNAP OUT OF IT!" Raph's shout brought Leo back to the real world. He almost fell down to the cold water, but he quickly took hold of his mind, and finally felt everything around him; the burning stares of his friends and his younger brothers.
"If you continue mourning about Karai, how about us?! You're going to leave us, together with this heck city?!" Raph blurted out, literally shouting at Leo.
Leo slowly turned his head, and met Raph's piercing gaze. He could see the anger from those eyes, but at the same time, he saw his hot headed brother's concern and his soft side. The red clad turtle was not as bad as he looks. He was in fact, more loving than anyone of them. He pretends that he doesn't care, but he really does.
"Move on, Leo! It was her freaking choice to leave, so stop wasting your time for her!" Raph clenched his fists and continued to glare at Leo.
The blue clad's eyes grew large, as he absorbed Raph's every word.
The others finally gained the courage to go towards the two eldest turtles. They already had the wickedest adventures that threatened to tear them apart. Too much pain and problems had been experienced by all of them. This wasn't the time to give up. Losing was a part of anyone's life. It hadn't had an excuse.
"Leo, I know that this is my fault. I should have worked an extra time for the retro mutagen. I really wished that there was thirteen o'clock after twelve." Donnie smiled sheepishly and rubbed his temples. Donnie already knew from the start that there was a large chance that Karai wouldn't be affected by the normal retro mutagen, but they still tried to take a risk. They say that there is no harm in trying, but that couldn't be proven. Sometimes, trying only adds more harm.
Leo shook his head. He couldn't utter a word, for his voice was not working with him. He knew it wasn't his brother's fault. Poor Donnie that he blamed himself for this. He knew that he tried his very best to create that retro mutagen, and there was no way he would blame Donnie for this.
Donnie seemed to understand his gestures. He smiled softly and Leo replied with a small smile of his, obviously forced.
"Uh, Leo. To be honest, I was terrified by your acts. But I understand, really! I know that you love Karai so much, and you don't want her to be hurt, just like what you did to me lately. Thanks!" Mikey smiled brightly, as he went towards Leo and wrapped him in a tight embrace. "Don't give up, till it's over, bro." He tapped the back of Leo's shell gently, as he was smiling.
Leo's eyes grew larger, as he was hugged by his little brother. He smiled, as he buried his head on Mikey's shoulder. It may be a pathetic view -the little brother comforting his eldest brother- but the two of them understand each other better, in their own unique way. Perhaps, it was a connection between the eldest and the youngest siblings that no one could explain.
Mikey released himself from the hug and stood beside Raph. He gave another reassuring smile before standing completely.
"Leo, dude. I'm not good with advices, but I just wanna say that you must always fight for right. If you think that something will benefit everyone, do it. I may not know Karai that much, but she seemed very important to you." Casey awkwardly smiled and tilted his head.
Leo appreciated what Casey said. He had been a very great friend for them. He accepted them as a part of his family, even though they were just a bunch of talking mutant turtles.
April took some steps forward, and sat in front of Leo, her legs were folded. She stared against Leo's deep blue eyes and smiled. "You know, I'm proud of you, Leo. I'm very thankful that I met all of you guys. If it wasn't because of you, I and my dad shouldn't be living at this moment. Well, I know that my dad isn't here, but I know that he is still alive, together with millions of people. We must move forward because we still have a city to reclaim, right?"
Leo nodded. "I know, April." The other guys gasped for hearing Leo's voice again. They all smiled, as Leo stood up, together with April.
"I understand, maybe I don't, but for heaven's sake, Leo. I know that you still like Karai, but that isn't an enough reason for you to lose your mind. We're here for you, bro. For you and Karai." Raph stood in front of Leo and frowned.
Leo always knew that this gesture of Raph tells everyone that he really did care.
"You just don't know how hard it was when you weren't there for us in the past three months," At Raph's statement, Leo was hit directly in his nerves. He raised his head and looked at his hot headed brother. He asked himself, how did they manage to live without him? He couldn't imagine his brothers, all were gloomy and were losing their hopes without them as their light.
"You're right, Raph. I know that I need to fill all those days that I was gone out cold,"
Raph smiled at him, with his eyes glistening with joy.
"Thanks guys. And I'm sorry." He hung his head down and became shameful for the act he just did a while ago. He was just too depressed to handle more heartbreak. Gratefully, his brothers and his friends were there for him.
All the guys, except April leapt on Leo and hung their arms on the back of his neck. Despite of the lack of space, they still managed to find a way for them to be closer at Leo. The blue clad glanced at April, and gestured her to come as well. April was reluctant, but she gave in. They all walked away, with laughs and giggles.
Leo turned his head back to the direction of the sea for the last time. He promised to himself and Karai that everything would turn back to what it was used to be. They would do anything, just to return the usual life in New York. As they made their way back to their temporary shelter and before facing another challenge of their life, a song played inside Leo's mind forcing him to tear up.
When I look into your eyes
It's like watching the night sky
Or a beautiful sunrise
Well, there's so much they hold
And just like them old stars
I see that you've come so far
To be right where you are
How old is your soul?
Well, I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you my love
I'm still looking up
And when you're needing your space
To do some navigating
I'll be here patiently waiting
To see what you find
'Cause even the stars they burn
Some even fall to the earth
We've got a lot to learn
God knows we're worth it
No, I won't give up
I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily
I'm here to stay and make the difference I can make
Our difference they do a lot to teach us how to use
The tools and gifts we got, yeah, we got a lot at stake
And in the end, you're still my friend, at least we did intend
For us to work we didn't break, we didn't burn
We had to learn how to bend without the world caving in
I had to learn what I've got, and what I'm not, and who I am
I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up, I'm still looking up
Well, I won't give up on us
God knows I'm tough enough
We've got a lot to learn
God knows we're worth it
I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up
Unbeknownst to them, Karai had witnessed everything. She raised her serpent head on the surface of the water, as she watched the turtles move away from her sight. She focused her eyes on Leo and hung her head down. She swum back and slither her way through the dark alleyways of the deserted city.
And that's the time when Karai was captured by Bebop and Rocksteady! The cage, mouse, then, blah blah blah.
Uhm. Well. I hope you liked it! If you may, please write a review. And again, this is only a one-shot drabble. I tell you honestly that I am still heartbroken because of that episode full of feels.
Thank you for reading!