Forgiving You and I

Chapter I

It had been 36 days since Clarke left Camp Jaha. She was staying in a bunker in order to rest. After all, all she had done so far was walk. Walk away from the pain. Or at least, that was her aim. She stayed most of the days locked in the small fortification. She would stay all day lying in a tiny bed thinking. Just thinking of what she could have done different. She wanted to draw, but every time she took a pen into her hands, she would remember herself pushing the lever. Her face didn't show any feelings. Not a single one. Her eyes were harsh. The lights that were usually so alive in her blue eyes weren't there anymore. There was only pain in it.

Pain…

How many times she felt it since she touched the ground? Too many times. She felt weak. She would barely eat the rations she found on the underground shelter. Since she landed on Earth everything became worst. First she met Finn.

Finn…

She tasted love. And had to kill him so he wouldn't have been tortured. Like she had to kill the mountain men, so they wouldn't kill her people. Maybe she wouldn't have killed all of those innocent persons if Lexa hadn't left her.

Lexa…

Clarke was mad at Lexa. Mad she left her people to die. Mad she took the deal. Mad she left her. She couldn't understand why she was so angry with this, why she wasn't able to hate her. The blonde wasn't able to cry. Her tears wouldn't fall down.

After a long time of thinking the sky girl decided to do something today. She stood up from her bed and almost fell because of the lack of strength in her legs. Her head was heavy but she wanted to go outside. To feel the sun on her face, to breath surrounded by trees. The young girl hadn't been outside for four days. Clarke opened the metallic door and stepped out of the bunker and closed her eyes. She took a big inspiration and sank into the forest. The sky was blue, not a single cloud was in it. The sensation of the sun on Clarke's face was the best. As she was walking, her gun was in one of her hands and a dagger was in the other.

Suddenly, the girl stepped in battlefield. Lots of grounders lying on the field. Dead. There was a lot of blood. It was like a butchery. Clarke freaked out when a hand grasped her ankle. She screamed and pointed her weapon to the warrior's head.

"What happened?" Clarke asked worried.

"Save our Heda," The warrior said with hardness. Clarke could see he was in pain just breathing. "Beja!"

Clarke knelled down next to the grounder and watched where he was wounded.

"Lexa is here? Where?" She started undoing his armor to treat his injury. The man's hand stopped what the blonde was doing.

"Ai gonplei ste odon." He said firmly. "Save Heda, please."

"I can save you, I'll go save the commander after." Clarke was worried about Lexa, but saving a life would make her feel better. She unzipped his jacket and saw three bullet holes in his chest. "It's a miracle you're still alive."

"You are losing time sky commander, the Commander is hiding in a cave across those trees." He pointed some trees before looking back to the blonde. "Sky girl, give me a good death. Please."

Clarke hesitated before closing the warrior's eyes. She took her dagger and put it closer to his neck before she pushed it into. The grounder died without pain and Clarke sighed before standing and running towards the cave. The blonde entered in the cavern and stopped when she saw Lexa lying in the ground.

"Lexa!" Clarke shouted before taking the commander's head into her hands. "Lexa!" She repeated before she noticed fresh blood on the brunette's waist. She raised the girl's shirt and sighed again. "It's not deep, but you lost a lot of blood so you need to wake up." Clarke pressed the wound in order to stop the blood running. When she pressed, Lexa groaned and opened her eyes, wondering what was happening.

"Cl-Clarke?" She asked with agony in her voice.

"Lexa! I need to get you somewhere I can treat you."

"Why are you helping me?" The commander asked, surprised the blonde was helping her.

"I don't know either." Clarke answered coldly.

"You are far away from your camp." Lexa stated, gazing the blonde.

"We'll talk later, now get up." The sky princess ordered. Lexa had no strength to fight Clarke's words back so she did what the girl said and stood up with hardness. Clarke kneeled waiting for the brunette to get on her back. "I'm waiting." She said ruthlessly.

"I will not get on your back, Clarke."

"You barely can stand, you want to walk on your own?" Clarke asked wryly.

Lexa didn't responded Clarke and got up on the girl's back as the blonde ordered. She hadn't strength to argue with Clarke. Not yet.

After some minutes walking towards the fortification Clarke helped Lexa entering in it.

"Lay." Clarke ordered as Lexa did.

The sky princess took off Lexa's heavy armor and raised the grey shirt tinted with blood. Clarke took the first cloth she could find and anchored it before applying it around the wound in order to clean the blood. Lexa retained herself from moaning while Clarke started stitching the injury.

After the blonde had treated Lexa's injuries the best she could she helped the brunette lay down in a bed and got up.

"I'm going to see if there are any others survivors, rest, I'll be back soon." The sky princess said before a hand reached hers.

"It's dangerous out there." The brunette said, thinking about who attacked her army and almost killed her.

"I know." Clarke said coldly before leaving. Leaving Lexa alone in her thoughts.

Beja: Please;

Heda: Commander;

Ai gonplei ste odon: My fight is over.