A/N: So here is a short update, because although I originally planned it to be longer, what is happening next just doesn't fit in with the chapter so I broke them up into two separate chapters. so yeah, a filler of sorts. still not quite in my mojo so i'm sorry, but seth has some thinking to do when he's handed the truth pill. review and tell me what you think! (on a review note, i've had a few negative comments turning up in my tumblr inbox that i decided not to respond too. if you dislike my story, that's fine. but please, just don't read it. i don't mind. but don't trash it anonymously in my inbox, thank you.) as always, for the nice messages i get, my tumblr is psychrollins and i'm always there for a chat!
/
Archie isn't happy at Seth making up with Randy, to say the least. When Dean obnoxiously opens his mouth and tells her, the look she gives him is enough to kill a man.
"Are you kidding me right now? You're letting that son of a bitch off the hook for what? Did he give you some bomb ass head or something? You were literally telling me you hated him a few hours ago!" Archie voice is loud and angry, and Dean is gripping her shoulders and preventing her from throwing herself over the bar to smack him. Seth opens his mouth, ready to defend himself but Archie is shaking her head at him furiously before shouting,
"Roman!" Roman hurries over to her immediately, a slightly scared expression on his face and Seth can relate to that really, because when Archie is mad she gets mad and you don't ever want to make her madder than she already is.
"Will you be okay minding the bar on your own for a few minutes? Seth and I need to talk." Archie grits out the words as she's glaring at him and Seth can't help but swallow and stare at the floor, he's not often on the end of Archie's anger so more often than not he's amused at how riled up she can get about things, but this is not as amusing as it normally is.
"Sure Arch," Roman is saying and Seth feels seriously betrayed right now, he gives Roman a silent please save me from her wrath pleading look, but his friend just shrugs, stepping away from them to serve another customer. Archie doesn't miss a second, leaning over the bar and grabbing a fistful of his shirt and practically dragging him towards the back, despite there being a bar between him.
His best friend rather gracelessly shoves him into supply room, slamming the door shut behind her and folding her arms across her chest.
"Well?"
Seth pats down his now crinkled shirt, not daring to meet her eyes. "Well what?"
"Why did you take Randy back after everything he said the other morning?"
Seth sighs, finally looking up. Archie's face is a mixture of annoyance and hurt and he knows she's hurt that he told her one thing and then seemingly did the other.
"Arch, we hadn't exactly split up, so I didn't 'take him back', I just decided that I wanted the petty argument to be over."
"Petty argument? Seth you got so upset that you threw a cup at him, you are not a violent person Seth, so don't come to me with this bullshit that it was something minor. Because it wasn't."
Seth sighs, "I know you don't like him Archie, but this is my relationship and if I want to forgive him then I will."
Archie throws her hands up in exasperation, "But you don't want to forgive him, I know you don't. You took Randy back for one reason and one reason only and it sure as hell weren't love."
"Oh yeah, why did I take him back then Mrs. Knowitall?" Seth grits out angrily, he and Archie have never exchanged such heated words before and he's trying to remain calm but Archie's words are eating away at him.
"Because you're trying to cover up your feelings for Roman." Her voice is softer this time, her big green eyes staring straight into his soul. "Ever since he's been working here you've slowly been letting him back into your heart and it's been eating away at you. You keep telling yourself that you can't go back there because of everything that's happened and to stop yourself you're letting Randy treat you like shit so that you stop yourself from falling back into Roman's arms." Seth's mouth hangs open and a small smirk finds its way onto Archie's face.
"I know I'm right, Seth, because for the past month I've watched you go from not even talking to the guy to telling me that you're comfortable around him again, and all those dreams you keep having."
Seth keeps his eyes on the floor, cheeks burning. Are his feelings for Roman that obvious, is he still so see through when it comes to his ex boyfriend?
"And let me tell you something, those feelings you've been having towards him? They're totally reciprocated." Archie is smiling softly now, stepping forward to lift Seth's chin with her fingers.
"Really?" Seth can't keep the curiosity, the longing from his voice and it has Archie smiling and nodding.
"I overheard them the other night, Roman and Dean. Dean basically said he loved me but didn't think he was good for me and Roman said that he wasn't good for you but he loved you more than anyone in his whole life." Archie places her hands on his shoulders and gives them a gentle squeeze, the anger seeming to have fully disappeared from her. Seth thinks it has something to do with the fact that she knows she's right. Which, she is, really, if Seth thinks about it.
"I got Dean back after all these years of hating him and thinking that he'd just left me, and I'm sure as hell not going to let anyone stand in my way of getting him. You know why? Because I love him. And I know in that weirdly working head of his he loves me too, the only thing stopping us is us. And it's the only thing stopping you and Roman. I know you said you didn't want to get involved with Roman again because of before, but he's so different now Seth. Stop making yourself unhappy, stop letting yourself be treated like dirt when there's a guy ready to treat you like a king." Archie kisses his cheeks and grabs his wrist, pulling him back towards the bar.
Seth's head reels for the rest of his shift, cogs turning in his brain all night long. Everything Archie said to him whizzes around inside of him, thrumming in his ears and pounding away in his heart. Is it that easy? To just, forget about all the stuff in the past, forget about Roman's prison sentence and move on? Tell him that he still loves him and wants to try again?
And what about Randy, just tell him that sorry, I want to get back with my ex. Maybe it is that simple, but what comes after wouldn't be so simple. With everything that's already happened between them, he doesn't think that Randy would take Seth dumping him for Roman would go down very well at all. But even though there are consequences, Seth can't help but think about it. Can't help but think about justifications for if he did do it, eyes always finding Roman laughing with a customer or talking with Paul whenever the man appears for a small amount of time.
Seth's still thinking about it when his shift ends, and he's walking home with his coat wrapped tightly around him. He's still thinking about it when he's feeding Willow and when Randy texts him a simple 'Love you', and even when he's getting into the shower. It's all he can think about. Because he's been trying not to think about his relationship with Roman since he got out of prison and now Archie has unknowingly pulled the plug on this big barrel of emotions and feelings and he just feels, overwhelmed. Sad, even, that he's getting so worked up about something that should be so easy and simple.
He knows it isn't though, nothing concerning his feelings for Roman will ever be simple. Not with Randy in the picture, he can't just go back; it doesn't work like that, does it? He has other people than himself to think about. Seth gets out of the shower and immediately gets the sleeping pills from the cupboard. He doesn't use them very often, never really needs to, but he knows that he'll need them tonight.