Chapter Six: A Matter of Perspective

Azula reaches the door of the Jasmine Dragon and a panting Ty Lee grabs her arm.

"What? We get to call my uncle out on what a lying fraud he is!" Azula spits and Ty Lee glares at her. Glares as if it is Azula's own fault that Ty Lee is deluded.

"I'm going home. Come find me if you remember why we got together in the first place," Ty Lee says coldly, an ice in her voice that Azula did not know was possible.

The princess has no response as Ty Lee adjusts her shoe and then strides off into the darkness, eventually disappearing behind the buildings of the Upper Ring, as Azula looks on breathlessly.

Azula shakes her head. It is unimportant. Ty Lee will come back on her hands and knees, won't she? She always does. And so Azula enters the shop, climbs up the stairs and finds Uncle reading Kioko a story. She looks entertained by it, but her neck snaps up and she loses all interest once she sees Azula.

"Hi!" Kioko says blithely and Azula sees the only person in Ba Sing Se who does not look at Azula with anger. Or the only person in the world who does not turn their head and then quickly look away, like whenever Azula bothers to go out in Caldera.

Kioko has no idea that Azula is the Crazy Princess. She just sees her as the lady who helped her out of the orphanage and is not good at all at making breakfast. That, to Azula, is very refreshing.

"Uncle, we have some quite serious things to discuss," Azula says calmly and her tone concerns him. She is not being whiny, or indignant; she seems to have a real and deep concern. "Kioko, why don't you go get ready for bed? I think Uncle bought you more pajamas than one kid could ever use."

"I like to shop." Iroh smiles warmly at Kioko as she scampers away at the speed of crashing lightning. His creased smile fades when Azula sits down across from him.

"I dislike how many emotional conversations I've had to deal with on this trip," Azula says with a sigh. "I still would have preferred the Boiling Rock." Azula remembers herself and clears her throat. "I met Kioko's grandmother today. Since Ty ─ Since I am trying to adopt her, it was a natural stop."

"What happened?" Iroh asks, studying her closely.

"Her name is Akio. And, I will be blunt, Kioko is your granddaughter." Azula says with her arms crossed. It is startling to her that she manages to stay so calm and collected. She feels like she has just scored an incredible victory over her uncle, but, strangely, it feels a bit hollow.

She hates Iroh, and she always has. Azula never hated Lu Ten, certainly. Her aunt and grandmother blend together into the same person, and she does not remember either of them well. Save for her grandmother's odd collection of monkey figurines, and how perfumey she was on her deathbed.

Iroh was always the enemy, according to Ozai. And Ozai was the only person that Azula could trust.

But, right now, she has to admit that over the past few months, she has made some new memories of Iroh that are not quite as poisonous as the old ones. And while she will always find him annoying, perhaps there is a point while forced together with a person that you have to learn about them.

She has put on a lens of clarity when looking at the past.

Iroh never cared for her at all. He is a monster just like her. But she does remembering him with a filter of loathing.

"Akio was a beautiful young woman," Iroh explains, looking at his feet and sighing. Azula clenches her jaw and tries to look as admonishing as possible. "I fell for her like autumn leaves. But it was very short-lived. I found he while I was on my quest for self after finding out that my father had died and been replaced by my brother."

"So she deserved being left pregnant?" Azula demands coldly and Iroh slowly shakes his head.

"No. She was a good person, and if I had known that… that she was, I would have behaved differently."

"You would have paid her off, just like my father did repeatedly." Azula glares at him, and he looks at her in melancholy confirmation. She supposes she can give him a half-point for honesty.

"I was in her village for a few weeks. A few weeks is not enough time to build a relationship. A few weeks is enough time for a couple of memorable adventures, and kind faces that eventually blur. Perhaps if I had more time with her, it would have been different."

Azula examines him. "And about Kioko?"

Iroh smiles faintly. "I think that Kioko likes you a lot. I know that you are looking into the adoption process to help someone adopt her, but I have looked at your papers because I am prying old man, and I can see you have not even looked for a single person or method of adopting her out."

"That is a rude invasion of my privacy. You have no understanding. You are just as bad as me and you should be remembered as a monster instead of a kindly man who serves tea," Azula spits and Iroh hesitates.

"It took a lot of time to be a kindly old man who serves tea. Like I said about General How calling you crazy; it's an easy mistake, I am still called a General sometimes although I gave up the army so long ago," Iroh says and Azula remembers the incident all over again. "To be honest, you have not put much effort into changing people's opinion of you."

"I don't want to. If they cannot accept me for who I am, they are unworthy of my attention. I will not apologize for how I live my life," Azula says coldly and Iroh studies her for a moment.

"Do you still think, as you said that day, that you won this city fairly?"

"I think I won by terms of war, and what I executed was fair." Azula then stares at her feet. Right afterwards, Jin showed her the Memorial Wall. "But this city is much more than a red pin on a map, and while I brought the walls down and take pride in that, as the Earth Kingdom would take pride in destroying Caldera, I don't think that it is a reasonable excuse for me."

"Excuse for what?" Iroh has a sickeningly twinkle in his eye.

"This conversation is boring and over. I just want you to know that I think you are as much of a sick old man as my father or grandfather, or any other general. You say it's an easy mistake? Perhaps more people should realize that you can't have your rank in our military without killing hundreds. I win."

Azula leaves before she can accidentally blurt out any other ridiculous thoughts on her foggy and tired mind.

[X]

Azula's Memories

"You've killed people?" Zuko asks, shocked.

Azula had mentioned it casually, as anyone else in the military would say. Military service is mandatory in the Fire Nation after all, once of a certain age. Just because Azula is a prodigy and does everything earlier than most does not mean she is exempt from the truth of the matter.

People are wrong to say the Fire Nation is ruthless. But, on the other hand, almost everyone has killed or created weapons to kill or mended the wounds of killers.

Zuko and Azula are alone together, and since they are both pitiful at small talk, they discuss how much they have changed over the years they were apart. It was only three, but it feels like a thousand.

"I was a soldier in a war. That's what war is. You think all the Earth Kingdom soldiers just went to live in a farm out west? It's just people killing each other. And I was good at it." Her words are pointed but expressionless and clinical. It is the true sign that any humanity in her is gone.

"I've never killed anyone." He does not sound as self-righteous as usual, just curious, and a little lost and Azula is amused by it in a sick way.

"You were never a soldier." Pause. "Neither was our father. Sometimes I think he doesn't have a grasp of the frailty of his power because they've all just been little stone pieces on a table like some kind of board game. I'm always more worried that he'll be ruined than I'll be."

Zuko scoffs and Azula cocks an eyebrow.

"Why would you worry? If he's ruined you get the throne. I'm not going to pretend for a second he intends to give it to me, even if he trusts me now. If he says he's proud of me. I'm not a soldier. I don't have a kill count to brag about."

"Nobody is bragging." Silence. Zuko is baffled by her words. It felt like something Azula would be proud of, and her tone leads him to have more questions than answers. "It's... interesting."

"Interesting?"

"You feel very powerful, but very weak. Because if you can do it to someone, someone can do it to you."

More silence. Azula watches the sweat on her brother's neck and knows it is not from the early summer heat wave. This is why she does not tell people things. Lying is fun, yes, but also easier. She lies about petty, insignificant things. Her shoe size, what she had for breakfast... everything. But it's all because honesty has gotten quite hard.

"But, there's a kind of deterioration of it at some point," Azula continues, finding opening to Zuko of all people to be easier than she thought. "The first time you kill someone is the hardest. I did it by accident, which I'm sure made it easier than some kid fresh out of school handed a sword and told to slash. But it doesn't matter if you're some Earth Kingdom little boy or Fire Lord Sozin himself; it's hard. To grasp mentally, I guess or something. I never faced a moral struggle about it, because I was applauded for the accident."

She is quiet for a moment and Zuko takes a deep breath. When she looks at him she sees that he wants to listen and it intrigues her. It is almost as if he cares.

And so she continues, "The second one is a little easier, definitely. My second was cathartic. It was the man who exposed my plot to you. I told them I wouldn't hesitate to strike them down and I did. The third one is just neutral, almost. And after that you get to the point where you just do it to watch the expression change."

Zuko sits very silently, unsure how he can respond to that. She realizes he is uncomfortable and it does not please her as it should, mostly because she was not intending to make him uncomfortable. She picks at her chapped lips and Zuko watches her peel the skin off with her fingers and not flinch.

He has to help her, not that she would ever want to be helped.

"Just to watch the expression change?" Zuko asks without meaning to. He wanted to change the subject but found himself fixated on her glassy gold eyes.

"Yes."

[X]

Ty Lee hates that the only thing she could think to say to stop Azula was a lie. She knows Azula is a murderer, but she also knows that Azula is a person. There is a shred of humanity in her if you know where to look. And Ty Lee just wants that shred to grow.

But she does truly think that perhaps Azula is not worth suffering over anymore.

"I thought about her," Ty Lee mutters to herself as she tries to find a toothbrush and get into bed. "I told myself that when I thought about exes, I started to miss them. I know this about myself. I know that I start to just see them as good memories and not bad ones."

She comes up short of the toothbrush and searches around for anything she can rinse the taste of food and bile out of her mouth with.

"It is a horrible cycle, and I think I should request a brainwashing from the Dai Li to forget all of my exes. Especially Azula." Ty Lee grimaces in the mirror, decides upon plain water, and then flops down on her bed.

Ba Sing Se was a poor choice.

Ty Lee is stuck there, remembering all of those sweet, happy times, painted lavender in her mind. Azula being witty, occasionally emotional. Azula shoving people out of the way when Ty Lee was being too polite. Azula waking up screaming and sobbing, and accepting Ty Lee's arms. Azula at the pond in the palace, throwing gifts from her father into it and watching them sink, because burning them seemed much kinder.

It brings a smile to her lips, but she has to force herself to know that the bad memories must outweigh the good.

Suki once asked Ty Lee who her best date was with. Azula. Suki, startled, then asked Ty Lee who her worst date was with. Azula.

Ty Lee should have never gotten involved.

[X]

Azula has yet to make the perfect cup of tea. Uncle says it is not just memorization; it involves love. That is ridiculous, because Azula can barely love a person, much less a cup of hot water with leaves soaking in it.

It is good tea, at least. She has made progress, but progress is not perfection or success.

Kioko is up, carrying a book under her arm. It looks old, and Azula leans to examine it.

It is Azula's book, from when she was a child. Why Uncle has it, Azula has no idea. She is subjected to a series of memories of carrying it around, of the ridiculous facts about dragons.

Of Lu Ten asking her to tell him something he doesn't know, and most of the time they were facts about dragons. But he never laughed or mocked her. That is why Uncle has the book. Because it was not Azula's first.

"Do you like that?" Azula asks and Kioko groggily nods.

"Can you buy me food?" Kioko asks, yawning.

"There is food in the apartment," Azula says softly before Kioko shrugs.

"I don't like any of it." Another yawn.

Azula squints at her briefly, and decides she might as well. Iroh agrees, and they travel wordlessly together.

[X]

"Can I try to talk to you?" Iroh offers as they walk down the busy street. Azula is stuck with him, whether she likes it or not, because she has no idea how to shop for Kioko.

"Yes. I won't promise to listen, though," Azula replies with a lofty sigh. She glances around the street and wishes she understood Ba Sing Se better.

"You showed great compassion to Kioko." Silence. He is right, but Azula says nothing. "You say it is because she is just like you. Look at that stranger, right there."

Azula pauses. "Are they also one of your abandoned love children?"

Iroh does not even falter, and Azula hates that. She wants him to hurt like she is hurting.

"That stranger has parents and people who love her, just like you," Iroh says and Azula scoffs. "That stranger has moments of victory, just like you. They have moments of anguish and suffering, just like you. That stranger will one day grow old, just like you. That stranger will go through the cycles of illness and recovery, just like you. That stranger will one day die, just like you."

"I don't get it."

"For my entire life, I thought that I was above everyone. I thought it would help me achieve and be remembered forever in honor. But it only made me suffer, and made the people around me suffer. Those strangers are living beings, like you, at your core, are just a living being."

"I am a…" I am a deity because that's what they all said and that's what I want.

But Azula's thoughts shift, I am small. He is right, and I am looking at that total, filthy stranger and they have the same limitations of humanity that I pretend I don't.

And then they get more forceful, And I am infinitely small because of it.

Iroh's lesson backfired, he notices as he watches Azula's lip twist into a snarl of frustration, and her long strides towards the first shop. But perhaps he can break through to her, before her escort comes to pick her up in two days.

"Let's say," Azula last says as she examines fruits and wonders if children like them, "that I actually have reason to be reformed. Do you honestly think that you can undo well over a decade in six months? Did you think that perhaps your wisdom would give me a miraculous breakthrough in less than a year?"

Iroh scratches his arm. "No. Nobody would expect something like that. It's one journey out of a thousand you need to take."

Azula frowns and moves on to types of bread. She glances for some kind of idea of what Kioko would like, since the girl was so unclear.

"It's pointless. People don't change unless they want to, and I think I have put in enough time to know that a tiger-monkey can't change its stripes, no matter how many ex-girlfriends, tea recipes, memorial walls and consequences of my actions that you shove in my face."

"I would be miserable if I never changed from my fourteen year old self." Iroh laughs. "I feel bad for anybody who knew me then. I think, while Zuko was foolish to think he could force you to change, it's equally foolish to want to stay the same forever."

Azula pauses, realizing that it is the one thing she has realized in Ba Sing Se. That perhaps she has looked on her past with an unfair and polluted nostalgia. She does not have to lie and say that she regrets; she just has to swallow the very bitter realization that her image of a flawless past and glory days are not very accurate.

She will, however, keep her mouth shut about it.

But Azula is well aware that she has chided Zuko for clinging to the dead dream of a happy family. They were never happy even if they were not murdering each other at one point.

Azula is clinging to the image of a girl who did not exist.

[X]

Azula's Memories

Lu Ten is made of happy memories, but that is probably because Azula never gained the time to make any bad ones.

They get along, when Azula is young. He thinks she is funny. He is ruthless like his dad and her dad and their grandfather, but he also is kind enough to teach Azula how to meow at the palace cats and get them to trust her.

He gets her the first book about dragons. Azula carries it around with her for years, becoming enamored with the brilliant creatures.

His father killed the last one.

[X]

"Do you like these?" Azula suggests to Kioko as they at last reach the apartment. Jin looks up and smiles at Azula and Iroh, setting down the paintings she was helping Kioko draw.

Kioko lifts one up and shoves it into Azula's hands. "This one is for you."

Azula squints at it, holding it away from her face to catch a glimpse. She cannot hide her laughter at how perfect the painting is. It is Kioko and Azula fighting some kind of stick monsters with scribbles of damp blue and red paint coming from their hands.

"This is wonderful," Azula says, the compliment not feeling awkward at all in her mouth.

Father only complimented Azula by bragging to others in front of her. He never once told her she was good enough at anything, and Azula has exactly one goal with Kioko. To not be Ozai, like everyone assumes she will be.

"I know." Kioko shrugs and smiles and Jin snorts with laughter. She sees Iroh and hands him one, which is far more tame, and is of him brewing tea with Kioko. His figure is less than flattering, but he thanks her anyway.

"Mine is much cooler," Azula says with a cock of her eyebrow. "I was asking if you liked these plum things."

"… apples?" Kioko asks softly and Azula frowns.

It is Iroh's turn to laugh.

"I know what an apple is," Azula hisses. She just presumed the Earth Kingdom had completely different fruit.

[X]

Azula goes out with Jin after teaching Kioko a few firebending moves. Kioko progresses very quickly, and Azula now understands why. She has royal blood in her veins. Azula must have sensed it subconsciously, which is why she felt the need to help Kioko.

Or so Azula keeps telling herself.

"Are you really leaving tomorrow?"

"My escort is getting here tomorrow. I leave the next day," Azula explains as she accepts Jin's hand in hers. "I doubt you want to come."

Jin shrugs. "I'm pretty happy in Ba Sing Se, but you should visit. At the anniversary of the building of the walls, the city lights up in such beautiful colors. It's amazing. That's two months from now or so."

Much, much too soon for Azula to return, if she ever does come back.

"Can I tell you something, before I go?" Azula asks Jin. The Earth Kingdom girl is buying two strange, stained ice treats. Azula examines it and tries to figure out how to eat it as they start walking again.

"Lick it. Don't bite; it'll hurt your teeth," Jin says, pointedly licking her own.

Azula likes it, but she tries not to show it.

"Do you ever think that people see the past as much better than it really was?" Azula inquires and Jin nods.

"And they see the future as worse than it really turns out." Jin chuckles at that statement as Azula bites her lip and thinks about Ty Lee yet again.

Azula wanted to turn back time; Ty Lee wanted to make a future together. Azula did not understand for a long while, harboring anger and confusion, because how could Ty Lee not want to regain her glory days? But now she sees that perhaps her memories were not too accurate.

"I have to be honest right now. It's not what I'm remotely good at." Azula takes a deep breath. "Ba Sing Se is the location of my greatest victory, and for years afterwards, I hated that this city would not be my legacy. I can still remember how I had never felt so happy as that night, and the day after."

Jin swallows, knowing what Azula is talking about. She had feared it, but she was halfway prepared to hear it.

Azula rubs her neck. "I, however, have realized that I have been depriving myself of more happiness by being fixated on trying to get that exact feeling back. I also have to say that I can't be with you, because I was the one who designed the coup. I was the one who brought the walls down and started the occupation. I am really not your type, because you are clearly a very nice person, who deserves someone else very nice."

"I don't… I don't know…" Jin frowns. "I thought it would be a vacation fling anyway… You're still in love with her, aren't you?"

To that, Azula can only sigh. "Yes, actually."

"Tell her you love her before it's way too late." Jin smiles. "But first we're completely finishing this date."

She grabs Azula's hand, and the princess conceals her surprise.

Azula expected the confession of her being responsible for the darkest days this city faced would make Jin despise her.

But it didn't.

Jin sits down on a park bench eventually, and Azula is puzzled.

"Do you remember what I said about my philosophy about memories?" Jin asks, studying Azula.

"That people are just memories, and that's what they're made of."

"Yes. And shared memories link people together in really beautiful ways. I have some pretty nice memories of your brother, and a couple nice ones of you."

"Those were incredibly insignificant."

"That is a matter of perspective."

Jin looks up at the sky, and Azula does too. They talk about other things, Jin tells funny stories and Azula makes witticisms about people they see in the park. It is platonic, and neither of them mind.

This is a memory Azula thinks she wants to keep, and when she says her last goodbye to Jin, she feels content.

[X]

Iroh's Memories

Iroh thinks that he remembers his father as someone better than he was. And Iroh thinks he remembers himself as someone better than he was.

As he looks at himself in the mirror, at last home, in this empty palace ruled by a selfish man, Iroh realizes he is remembered for nothing but failure. People look at him and see a dead child and dead dreams, and Iroh believes he will never shake that.

He keeps staring in the mirror, like he never has before. His face becomes distorted.

Iroh needs a reason. He needs to erase the pained memories.

He does.

[X]

Azula has finished packing, with the silent help of her uncle.

He hands her an envelope. "Open this when you are alone. It is very personal from me, and I fear your jabbing comments will hurt my feelings."

She knows he is teasing her, but she just sighs and tucks it into her clothes. "Kioko! Kioko, do you have your bags packed."

"I don't know what to do with these ones," Kioko whines, looking very distressed.

"Uncle, for the love of Agni, did you buy her more useless junk?" Azula snaps and Kioko laughs.

"I like useless junk. Look at this!" Kioko rummages in the stretched and breaking bags and withdraws a small, weird green contraption. She pushes on it with her small finger and tries to make it fly, but it falls flat. Azula rushes to pick it up, and Iroh cocks an eyebrow as she puts it in her own bag.

"How about play with things that aren't flying razors? Uncle," Azula snarls and Kioko nods. Iroh conceals his laughter.

The ruckus downstairs reveals that Azula's escort back to the Fire Nation has finally arrived. Iroh goes downstairs to let them in, and after a few more moments of Azula packing in silence, she hears just one person come up the stairs.

"Zuko?" Azula asks, her eyebrows shooting up in shock. "You're Fire Lord. What are you doing in this disgusting city?"

"Still disgusting? Your four and a half months didn't make you realize the beautiful and excessive charm of the Earth Kingdom Cultural Capital?" he asks with a smile.

"It would have probably been nicer if I were on vacation and not sold into slavery by my own brother." Azula rolls her eyes. "This was a waste of time."

Zuko shrugs. "It was honestly just to keep you out of the way while I dealt with the New Ozai Society. And maybe to torture you a bit."

Azula flashes him a warning glance. "Don't you ever dare do this again. Accidents happen to many people. Even Fire Lords."

"I really didn't expect much, but I am surprised you lasted this long without asking to come home," Zuko says and Azula shrugs again. Then, the Fire Lord suddenly notices the little girl. "Who is that?"

"Our cousin," Azula says swiftly, her lips twitching with a smile.

"Uncle!" Zuko shouts in horror and Kioko looks very confused. "I-I sorry. What's your name."

"Kioko," the little girl says brightly.

"Princess Kioko," Azula corrects.

Zuko stares at her for a moment. "Huh?"

"I have put into motion documents to legally adopt her. Perhaps you can speed them up a bit with your Fire Lord influence." Azula says it as if reading a grocery list, and Zuko does not even have time to take it in.

Azula frowns.

"Is there anything left you want to do?" Zuko asks and Azula has been thinking about it. "I doubt they're ever going to let you back into Ba Sing Se."

"You heard about my arrest by the Dai Li?" Azula inquires curiously and Zuko's eyes widen. Clearly not. "I want to make one last visit. Well, two. I'm going to attempt to get the girl."

"I hope that works out for you…"

"What? You don't think it will. I'm charming and honestly I have suffered enough. I deserve to at least escape this awful city and get the girl, ZuZu."

He cannot tell if she is kidding or not, but she is gone before he can do much more.

Zuko looks at Kioko, his soon-to-be-niece and weakly smiles.

[X]

Ty Lee is looking at job postings when she hears a loud knock on the door. She walks to it, wondering if she should avoid opening it or not, or at least touch up the dark circles under her eyes first.

"Azula… I…" Ty Lee hesitates. She did give herself the rule that, if Azula chased her, she would give her a brief chance.

"I'm sorry for all of the things I've done here," Azula says and Ty Lee makes a strange face. That is hard to believe. "I mean it. I'm not just saying that to get you to make out with me. While you are the one who made up a fake boyfriend in a house that doesn't seem to have a single veranda, I am the one who has been so caught up in the past that I… Anyway, I know why we broke up."

Ty Lee can only blink. "This is really sudden."

"I'm leaving in an hour. Come for a walk with me," Azula says.

"Are we going to get arrested again?"

"Maybe." Azula smirks and Ty Lee sighs.

"Why do I always let you do this? Why?" she snarls, mostly at herself.

"Because I am gorgeous, witty, perfect…" Azula lists before taking Ty Lee's hand.

It is true, like Jin said. Walking with Ty Lee is like walking with memories, and that is nice. Even if most of her memories are pretty painful.

Ty Lee and Azula wind up at the Ba Sing Se Memorial Wall. It is the absolute last place Ty Lee imagined Azula being, and Azula feels the same exact way.

"Why are we here?" Ty Lee asks in confusion and Azula sighs.

She hates being so honest. "The city has absolutely nothing to offer but ugly souvenirs and gross everywhere, but this, I'm never going to see again. And, honestly, I didn't look very closely last time."

"I can't even bear being here. All of these names are dead because of me."

"I think that I'd like to look at all of the effects my tiny actions have had. From both sides. I want perspective, before I go, seeing as this entire trip seems to be some kind of divine plot to get me to realize just how significant Ba Sing Se was."

"It wasn't just a bunch of parties and awards and glamor."

"Yes, it was an act of war, and I will be in the history books forever because of it. It is, therefore, fair, that I, as an intelligent woman who is trying to get a handle on her life again, to have true perspective of what I will always be remembered for."

"You don't have to have just that."

"I have no idea. Your memories of me will disappear when you die. So will everyone else's. But my name in connection to the fall of the Earth Kingdom and coup of Ba Sing Se will live eternally, even if nobody is alive anymore who can remember."

Ty Lee knows she is right, and she knows that Azula is the type of person who likes to analyze every last detail before she is content.

And, honestly, Azula needs a bit of contentment. Maybe this glimpse of perspective into her immortal acts is the one thing she will get out of her trip to Ba Sing SE.

Maybe not.

She will not get Ty Lee. At least for now, the acrobat has decided. But, Ty Lee has, in these short months, started to remember why she does love this woman, even if it takes them another ten years to put the pieces together.

It will happen eventually, Ty Lee knows.

But old wounds don't heal this fast, and that is definitely true judging by the fresh flowers all over the memorial wall, and the faint sound of a woman crying nearby.

[X]

Ty Lee's Memories

"Azula," Ty Lee says to the mirror, on her thousandth rehearsal for their break up. She loves Azula, and she will always love her, eternally. No matter what happens. But right now, they're hurting each other. "Azula, I am more in love with the memories of you than the you right now."

Ty Lee disposes of that breakup speech.

Because it is too true for either she or Azula to handle.

[X]

Azula and Ty Lee are back at Iroh's apartment as the final preparations are being made for leaving. Ty Lee played with Kioko for a few moments, and as she watched Azula with her, she felt herself falling in so many kinds of love.

But Azula does not need to fall in love with Ty Lee again. She never stopped.

Now, they are outside, in the cooler air, having a last conversation. Azula knows that Ty Lee is not coming back with her, especially after the murder incident. But she is pretty certain that she likes at least this part of her future.

She thinks, despite the unknown she despises, that she might get the girl in the time ahead of her.

"Somebody told me that people are made of memories, and they're made up of the memories you have of them, and the memories you make with them," Azula says honestly as she realizes how ridiculous she sounds. She probably should have just had Uncle write her a dumb poem. "I like the memories you're made of."

Azula clenches her jaw and looks away, her heart pounding. She cannot believe this vulnerability.

"I like the memories you're made of." Ty Lee moves to kiss Azula but then hesitates. "But I think you better start liking the memories you're made of too, before I make any new ones with you."

"Are you breaking up with me again?" Azula snaps viciously and Ty Lee rolls her eyes.

"No. I'm telling you that you are made of so much more than a few big feats and a couple bad memories that keep you up at night. And that's why I love you, in ways other people don't. Because I see those little tiny memories that make you a person."

Azula grimaces. "Well, yes, but your memories with me certainly include less attempted murder and hatred."

Ty Lee laughs and shrugs. She cannot deny that.

"I'm not quite done in Ba Sing Se. I haven't made all the memories I want to. But, I am planning on coming to Caldera in a few weeks. I think you should take me on a really nice date to make up for getting me arrested by the Dai Li," Ty Lee says brightly, now grinning.

"My six months are up, and of course, there wasn't a magic breakthrough, huh?" Azula remarks with a mirthless laugh. "I was right."

Ty Lee also cannot deny that some things never change. "Zuko is sweet, but I think it's funny that he thought making you a waitress for six months would suddenly change you and heal wounds that were made over really long years."

"It was a pointless waste. Just like my conquest of Ba Sing Se. A pointless waste."

"You got Kioko."

Azula does nod. "I know."

"And I think Kioko doesn't know a single thing about Princess Azula the Conqueror, or the Crazy Princess. She likes you a lot," Ty Lee says, stroking Azula's wrist gently. "She has a completely clean slate to make memories of you, and I think she already has some pretty good ones from here in Ba Sing Se."

"Fine, Kioko aside, even if it didn't make me worse, it didn't make me any better either. It was a waste, and I refuse to lie and say that because I had some emotional outbursts and a few brief revelations about my family and personality, that I am miraculously changed."

Ty Lee frowns in thought. "It's little things that matter most. The ones that add up. Do you think that Ba Sing Se, or the Comet, or your mom leaving you or any of that are the only events that shaped you as a person?"

"They are the major events in your life. They are the memories that actually count, because absolutely everyone has them of me in some ways," Azula argues as she glances at Zuko and Kioko getting very impatient.

"Just stop this whining! It is so ridiculous and selfish to think that you only matter when you're affecting the whole world! These are the reasons why I broke up with you. It was those tiny moments, like weird midnight conversations, and trying new food, and getting into fights and then making up and forgetting what they were even about that made me like you." Ty Lee crosses her arms. "I am way more important than the whole world.

"Oh, and I'm the selfish one," Azula purrs with a small laugh.

"I never said I wasn't." Ty Lee winks.

Azula shrugs, and has to admit she likes that point. "I hate your optimism, but ─ and so help me if you tell anyone what I'm about to say to you, you will die ─ I also would hate to be defined just by those moments. And don't start grinning like you're a genius; I don't want to be defined by those moments because they wound up kicking me in the jaw. And I'm telling you this because I want you to date me again."

Ty Lee laughs, because it is true. She does, however, see in Azula's eyes that, while Fire Lord Zuko is probably never going to make her good, and while none of this is going to go away in a flash, there are a lot of bits and pieces on the way.

Change creeps up you. Just like most things do.

"Here's a moment to add to your collection," Ty Lee says confidently and Azula cocks an eyebrow.

And she is quite pleasantly surprised when Ty Lee presses her lips against Azula's, and does not break free for several breathless moments.

Zuko's shout from inside interrupts their moment, "Azula, we really have to go. I think Kioko might chew through her suitcases!"

Azula hesitates. "It is your lucky day, because I'm going to tell you one more very private thing, because that kiss was persuasive."

"Mhm?" Ty Lee suppresses a smile.

"If I'm made up by little moments like that, and not my greatest victories and losses," Azula admits quietly, hating how voicing it seems to make it all the more true. "I don't really know how to face what that means."

"What does it mean?" Ty Lee is stunned. One last sentence before Azula leaves, of course, is the only time she shows vulnerability, and shows that this was not the waste she intended it to be.

Azula thinks of the memorial walls, and Jin, and how making a cup of tea felt exciting to her.

"If my importance to others is based on minute instances, I, Princess Azula the Conqueror, am infinitely small."

Ty Lee nudges her and wordlessly gestures at the sky. Azula has no idea how to react to that until Ty Lee replies, just as softly;

"So are stars from this far away. It's all a matter of perspective, princess."

The End

A/N: Thank you for reading this far. The ending is quite open, because I really didn't want Azula to be redeemed or fully win Ty Lee in this brief period. It's kind of meant to just be a glimpse into a time of Azula's life where she realizes many things, and confronts her actions, but what she is going to do with those revelations is up in the air., as I think it would probably work in real life (personal opinion, of course). That was my intention of the past five chapters, and I really hope it made sense and the ambiguity isn't disappointing.

I might someday write a sequel, but I've had the ending written for a very long time, and am quite content with it. All that aside, I hope you enjoyed it. :)