CHANGE

Chapter 10

"Thank you for coming so quickly, Sidney," Hawkeye said. He'd called for the psychiatrist, Sidney Freedman, as soon as Elizabeth had sent him out of her tent the day before. He knew that she'd not be pleased with him, but if there was anyone that could help her get past this, it was Sidney.

"Of course, Hawkeye. You said it was important…and urgent…" Sidney Freedman smiled. He turned and grabbed his brief case and duffel from the back of the jeep. "So, I figured this woman must mean a lot to you…"

"It's not like that, Sidney."

The psychiatrist looked genuinely surprised. "It isn't?"

"Whether you choose to believe it or not, we're just friends," Hawkeye told him as they walked further into the camp.

"How do you feel about that?"

"Listen, bud, I didn't bring ya here to analyze me," Hawkeye said.

Sidney grinned under his moustache. "Well, why don't we just see how it goes? How does she feel about you calling me in?"

Hawkeye looked down to his feet, then back up to Sidney. "She doesn't actually know that you're coming…"

"Oh, well, this should be fun," he deadpanned. "I could sure use a good cup of coffee – you know since you got me out here so early," he changed the subject.

Hawkeye smiled. "Well, we don't have anything like that here. But we could get you a mug of the crude oil."

Sidney smiled and shook his head. "I'll take whatever you've got," he laughed.

"Maybe we ought to have you checked out," Hawkeye laughed.

…

A lieutenant came to take Sidney's bags and the two men moved toward the mess tent.

Inside the tent, Elizabeth was sitting with Margaret, both of them had a cup of coffee and a bowl of tan mush – the oatmeal – sitting in front of them.

"Good morning, ladies," Hawkeye smiled in their directions. "We have a guest today," he pointed towards Sidney with his elbow.

"Doctor Freedman," Margaret smiled while she stood. "It's nice to see you again. Elizabeth, this is Doctor Sidney Freedman, a wonderful psychiatrist. Doctor Freedman, this is Doctor Elizabeth Lawrence."

Elizabeth gave Hawkeye a distinct side-eye that Doctor Freedman did not miss. But she extended her hand and shook Sidney's outstretched one.

"It is very nice to meet you, Doctor Freedman."

"Oh, please call me Sidney," he smiled. "I didn't mean to interrupt your breakfast, Doctor Lawrence."

"Oh no worries, it's not much of a breakfast. And please, call me Elizabeth. Tell me, how long will you be staying with us, Sidney?"

"A few days, I think. I like to come here, lose a few bucks in a poker game, drink the rocket fuel they make in the Swamp and escape the rest of the war," Sidney told her.

She nodded and smiled.

"Well, I'll get us some coffee. Can I bring you a refill, Bets?" Hawkeye asked.

She smiled sweetly in his direction.

"I'm all set. Thank you, though, Doctor Pierce."

He knew he was in trouble from the tone she'd used. But he still felt he was right in calling for Sidney.

"Will you both please excuse me? I'm due to be in post-op in five minutes," Margaret told them.

"Of course," they replied together.

Sidney stood as Margaret did and sat once she'd left.

"So – Hawkeye called you in about me," she said with an amused smirk.

"Very perceptive," Sidney smirked back while arching a single eyebrow. "How do you feel about that?"

"Oh, well, I'd like to be upset, and I suppose I am, to an extent, but I also find it incredibly touching to have the kind of support that these folks have given me."

Sidney nodded. "There are a lot of caring folks in this compound," he agreed.

"And while I really appreciate that he brought you here, I just…" she trailed off as Hawkeye walked up to them once more. "I'll catch up with you gentlemen later. It's been wonderful to meet you, Doctor Freedman."

She smiled once more while she picked up her tray. She deposited it and exited the tent.

"So…?" Hawkeye asked.

"So what?"

"Is she all right?"

"I think she's fine, but I'll want to talk with her more later. You – you on the other hand are in hot water, buddy. Something going on between you two?" Sidney asked.

Hawkeye gave him a dirty look.

"Hey – professional hazard. She means something to you – any dummy could see that just by watching you two – but you went to some extreme lengths to get me out here to talk with her. That's over and above."

"Yeah – so why are you talking with me then?" Hawkeye asked, leaning his elbows down on the table.

"Perhaps – never mind," he said. "BJ!" Sidney said as the tall doctor joined them in the mess tent.

"Doctor Sidney Freedman! To what do we owe the pleasure? Oh, I know," BJ said as he shook Sidney's hand and looked at Hawkeye.

"What?" Hawkeye shrugged in a 'who me?' kind of fashion.

"You called Sidney here to talk to Elizabeth. How does she feel about being psychoanalyzed without her permission?" BJ asked.

"He's found himself in some deep…" Sidney started.

"He likes her, you know," BJ smiled.

"Oh, I know," Sidney replied.

"He can hear you, ya know?" Hawkeye groused.

"Interesting," Sidney said while stroking his moustache.

Hawkeye was up in an instant. "Oh, no you don't! You're not going to turn this around on me!"

"Hawkeye, what would you say has made you so anxious and paranoid? Is he getting enough sleep?" Sidney asked BJ.

"I think he could do with more sleep, less war…" BJ said.

"Ugh!" Hawkeye said. "I've had enough of you two hens. Cluck away!"

He let out an exasperated huff and exited the tent to a chorus of BJ and Sidney chuckling.

…

Night was falling before Sidney Freedman saw Elizabeth Lawrence again. He had wandered to the mess tent for a cup of coffee and found her engrossed in conversation with Father Mulcahy. They were the only other people in the tent. He sat down with his cup; he couldn't hear what was being said, but he could tell she was finding comfort in what the Father was saying to her.

"Father, I really appreciate you taking the time to listen to me, even though I'm Lutheran and not Catholic," Elizabeth told him.

"Elizabeth, I'm pleased you wanted to talk with me."

"I think you're the only one who can help me, Father. I just – I just feel so guilty. Lieutenant Kranz was hit and he didn't have much time. He wasn't making much sense – he really wasn't there. He kept calling me Stephanie. That's his fiancée's name. He told me he loved me, thinking I was Stephanie. I didn't – I didn't know what to do, so I told him I loved him, too. He kept apologizing for not being able to make it to the wedding. I just told him it was all right and I kept telling him I loved him. He died just a few minutes later in my arms. I lied to a dying man."

"No, no," Father Mulcahy said, putting his hand on hers. "You provided comfort to a man who needed it. There wasn't anything you could have done to prevent the physical pain, but you were able to administer some mental comfort."

"But…"

"You comforted him – you told him what he needed to hear. He believed you were Stephanie. And Stephanie likely would have said those very words."

"If I did what I needed to, why do I feel so guilty?" Elizabeth asked.

"Because you're human, just like the rest of us."

"I don't know if you know this, but you're a very wise man, Father."

"It's easy to sound wise when you've got Him on your side," he pointed upward. "And while you're at it, have a little faith in yourself, Elizabeth. And cut yourself some slack. I've had to learn it, too, but not everyone can be saved – physically or spiritually. It feels like failure, but what I've had to learn here is to look at the other side. You lost a few, not because you didn't care or you didn't try, but because of the circumstances. And because you put your own safety aside and showed your dedication to helping others, eleven men are going to be okay. Don't just focus on the bad things, that isn't want He'd want you to do."

She nodded, accepting his explanation. "I was thinking of writing a letter to Lieutenant Kranz's fiancée. Is that silly?"

The Father smiled. "Why would that be silly? I think is a wonderful idea."

"I'm going to send my medal to her as well," Elizabeth said.

He nodded. "I think that's a very touching sentiment."

"I want her to have it. It's not a husband, but it's a symbol of the man he was. He died trying to protect me and his friend. And I think that's very important. Would you read it over before I send it?"

The Father smiled at him. "Of course I will."

Sidney had overheard enough. There was nothing wrong with Elizabeth Lawrence. She just had to find the right person to talk to and the right way to express what she was feeling. And judging by the smile on her face, she'd found that person with Father Mulcahy.

…

"What do you mean you're leaving? You haven't even talked to her," Hawkeye said as Sidney Freedman loaded his things into the back of a waiting jeep.

"She doesn't need me, Hawkeye. And the 8063rd does. She found what she needed. Or at least had what she already knew reaffirmed. And the other MASH unit has someone who actually needs me."

"What?"

"Your Elizabeth Lawrence is going to be just fine. I'm so sure I'd put money on it," Sidney said. "Have a little faith."

He climbed into the jeep, and despite the late hour, they took off in the direction that led them out of the camp.

Hawkeye was still standing there, dumbfounded when Elizabeth emerged from the OR building.

She smiled at him was she walked towards him and gave him a peck on the cheek. He was unfrozen by her action and his face broke into a smile.

"What was that for?" he asked. "Not that I minded…" he waggled his eyebrows.

"Just as a thank you – for being so worried about me," Elizabeth said. "Even though I never got a chance to talk with your Doctor Freedman. It's a shame he had to leave. I would have loved to hear his diagnosis…of you."

"Of me?" he smiled. "Oh, Bets, there aren't enough hours in the war, despite what one might think."

"Well, why don't you buy me a drink at the officer's club and you can start at the beginning. I've got all night."

…

Hawkeye and Elizabeth had sat up talking for the most of the night. They'd finally parted ways sometime around three for their own tents. And now at dawn something was making an awful racket.

It was a rooster.

An incredibly loud rooster.

"Did we stumble onto Old MacDonald's war instead of the Swamp last night?" Hawkeye asked his tent-mate.

Sitting up and looking at one another, both grimaced as the soon-to-be deceased rooster crowed again.

Hawkeye pulled his boots on and stood to grab his red ragged robe.

"Where are you going?" BJ asked.

"We could be having roast chicken for dinner tonight if we play our chickens right," Hawkeye told him. "He'll learn there's a price to pay for disturbing my sleep."

"Well, I've got to see you chase a chicken," BJ stuffed his feet into his own boots and pulled on his blue robe before following Hawkeye out of the tent.

Lots of bleary-eyed camp inhabitants were emerging from their own tents as BJ and Hawkeye made their way towards the sound.

Following the sound, they found Frank attempting to sneak from Margaret's tent.

"I didn't know you made house calls, Frank. You're out awful early," Hawkeye said.

"Or you're sneaking out very late," BJ added.

"You – you guys!" his faced was screwed up in frustration. "Marg – Major Houlihan needed some assistance…for your information."

"Sure she did, Frank."

"Whatever you say, Frank."

"Honest!" he whined while he stamped his foot. "Aren't you two up a bit early from your benders?"

The rooster made another call and all men's heads turned in the direction of the main building in the camp where Radar was known to keep his pets.

Hawkeye shook his head. "Oh, Radar."

…

"Shhh, shush…" Radar told the rooster in its cage. "You'll wake the whole camp."

"I think you're too late, Radar," BJ said as they rounded the corner.

Radar was still in his pajamas, with his wool cap, while he tended to the loud animal.

"So, where did you get that?"

"Get what?" Radar asked, standing in front of his poultry friend trying to block it. However, the rooster didn't know it was supposed to be hiding. Or quiet. It crowed again.

"Foghorn Leghorn there – in the cage. You know, the loud thing with all the feathers?"

"Well…" Radar started while looking between the three men's faces.

"Radar…" BJ said in a semi-warning tone.

The rooster crowed again. It was unlikely that anyone was still asleep now.

"You had better cockle-doodle-doo something about that thing or – or I'll round up some hungry villagers and we'll have a barbecue," Hawkeye threatened.

"Well, I don't wanna get her in trouble."

"Which 'her' are you referring to?" Hawkeye asked, even though he knew exactly who the 'her' was.

"Well, late last night, well, real early this morning, I guess…this girl came running into camp. I could tell that she needed help and Major Lawrence heard us talking and she – she left to help them."

"That explains very little, Radar. Would you care to add a few more details to the story?" Hawkeye asked. "Or do we need to go find Bets?"

"Well, sir, that might be kinda difficult on a count that, uh, she ain't back yet."

"What?!" Hawkeye exclaimed.

BJ put a hand on his friend's shoulder. "Hawkeye, calm down. I'm sure it's not all that…"

"She's been gone for a couple hours now, but I think the girl was saying her grandma was sick – that could be…"

"Oh, sure…" Frank said. "That was probably a spy drawing out doctors – she's probably de-" he continued.

"Shut your mouth, Frank, or I'll shut it for you. With some sutures," BJ said in an aggressive tone.

Frank retaliated to the harsh words by sticking out his tongue. He stamped his foot and headed off in the other direction.

"That still doesn't explain where the chicken came from," BJ said.

Hawkeye turned to BJ. "Why are you so concerned about this ridiculous bird?"

"Up until thirty seconds ago, you were concerned about the chicken, too," BJ told his friend. "So, Radar?"

"The girl had brought it to trade…"

"You traded a doctor for a chicken?" Hawkeye asked.

Radar looked horrified at the thought. "No! I mean, it seems like that, but no! Major Lawrence told me to take it – the girl was insisting and was really upset and she just told me to take the chicken and she'd be back when she was finished."

Hawkeye was visibly angry. "Do you know where she was going? Did they give you a location?" he asked.

"I'm sorry, sir," Radar said. "Elizabeth and I could only understand a little bit of what the girl was saying – we just knew she was in distress. I couldn't have stopped Elizabeth."

"Did they take a jeep or leave on foot?"

Radar hesitated. "They left in a jeep."

"Damn it!" Hawkeye shouted. "She could be anywhere!"

The sound of a jeep was heard coming down the road. It stopped near them and a very tired Elizabeth sat at the wheel. All eyes were on her as she turned the engine off.

"What the hell were you thinking?" Hawkeye said as he stood next to her.

….

Author's Note: You're all awesome! Thank you so much for the kind words that you've been sending for each of the chapters! Hopefully you've liked this one too! Let me know!