Went face to face with all our fears

learned our lessons through the tears

made memories we knew would never fade

the nights by avicii

Her head is on his chest, and she hasn't even realized this all night. She's just noticed after waking up and realizing a pair of strong arms are holding her closely. His steady heartbeat thumps against her ear, reminding her he's fine and healthy, just some bruises and cuts. She exhales a quiet, but shaky breath because she's still take repercussions from all of what's happened. She's never meant to have so much withdrawal, it just somehow happened.

It's a Thursday morning and neither of them have any classes, so she stays silent and still, letting herself relish in the moment.

God, she's missed being in his arms. It's only been a day, but one night of not getting any required sleep has made her feel like something was missing all along. And it frightens her because he's filling the void in her heart (has a long time ago, but she refuses to believe so) and he has so much power over her, over possibly hurting her, and she hates that. But fuck, that's how relationships are, that's how it goes. She just doesn't want to watch him slip away from her, and facing the truth is scary to her, but she needs to, and she knows.

Swimming in the high tides are annoying, waiting for someone to bring her home, to have a place to belong to. She can't continue to try and fool herself, to run away from everything again. In the end, the same thing, same concept, same messages still apply to her.

Killian finally wakes up, looking down at her. He grumbles, "Good morning," and she does the same in return, but her voice is quiet.

"Why did you not respond to any of my messages last night, Swan? Have I done something wrong?" he asks, his hand brushing over her hair.

"No, no, no," she quickly denies, gulping. "I was at the library working on the last thing for my painting."

"The explanation portion?"

"Yeah. I just didn't realize my phone went off. It's a library… it was on silent obviously - sorry, I made you worry, didn't I?"

"Aye, you did," he murmurs. "After the brawl I got in with Walsh, you've been pulling away and I fear losing you, love. I don't know what else to do to prove to you much how sorry I am, Swan. I- I can't lose you too, if you understand me. You might know me as a bloody ignorant fool who loves to make jokes and all, but losing you… watching you walk away from me without a single thing I can do, you would take that all away, there would be a part of me torn away with you." He sighs, his hand rubbing over her waist. "And I know your issues. You fear losing me the most, too."

"Stop it," she sternly states, shaking her head, burying her face at the crook of his neck. "If you know this, if you want to make us work out well, you need to try too, Killian. Stop talking about it, and prove it to me, prove it to yourself."

He cradles the back of her head. "I promise, I swear I will, Emma. I will prove it."

She smiles, hearing his vow is somewhat calming and reassuring in several ways. "Good, now can we go back to sleep?"

"As you wish, darling."

They don't spend the day doing much in particular. The entire thing with Walsh is still a battle in her mind, and she's surely positive Killian has noticed how she sometimes tends to zone out and forget what they're discussing. He sighs and shrugs, not bothering to ask her about it. She's thankful for that because it may be easy to think about it, but speaking out on it - god, she'll be sure to lose her mind if she has to say anything at all.

She dozes off on his shoulder, halfway through their third movie of the day. Waking up isn't pleasant when it's to some nightmare, but Killian's there, jumping off his bed and to where she is on hers, cradling the back of her head and rubbing her back gently, soothing her from the sudden fright. Her hands are still trembling as she purses her lips, pushing herself deeper into his embrace. He once again, does not ask what she's had a nightmare about, brushing his lips over the crown of her head.

"Stay?" she asks quietly.

"Always."

He holds her closely, threading his fingers through her hair. She's still scared of going back to sleep, thinking these sudden, horrific nightmares will return shortly if she goes back into slumber. He must notice her hesitance, so he drapes one arm over her and pulls her in closely. "I'll keep you safe." It's a couple of words that release some of her tension and fear, before she shuts her eyes tightly.

Later, when she's awake and waiting for the paper to print, she stares blankly at the wall. He jumps at her which makes her perk up and nearly fall off her seat. He runs a hand through his hair, smiling and kissing her cheek.

"Why did you do that? Jesus," she mutters, rubbing her face.

"Loosen up, love," he insists, nudging her shoulder with his hand. "Printing that thing for your project?"

"Yep."

"I'm proud of you," he murmurs, "for completing such a masterpiece, of course."

She grins at his compliment, sighing contently. "Well, thanks, I guess. By the way, I never got to see your final project when you said you'd show me. There was always something getting in the way, spoiling our plans."

He opens his mouth, scratching the back of his ear. "Perhaps you'll have to see it in class tomorrow when you go hand in your work. Mr. Andrews already put it up on display even though I told him I'd prefer not to."

"Oh? Why not?" she asks. "Like, why not have it up there? Your work is great."

"Aye, that I know, but I don't want to be under the limelight." He shrugs. "Besides, it's our last year, so what's the point? I'd rather have him put up new work from those other talented people."

"Look at you wanting to be generous," she teases, taking the printed sheet out of the paper. "That's a good thing to consider, Killian. But you deserve it - the recognition of your work."

"And so do you," he whispers, quietly.

She chuckles, shaking her head. "Really? I mean, yeah my stuff can be good, but it's nothing compared to those other artists in my class. I'm still levels under them," she explains, only trying to state the truth to him. "But you know what? I'm looking forward to my future anyways because someone told me to stay enthusiastic and prepared for everything ahead of me. I don't care about being famous, as much as that sounds nice. I just… want to do something I love, and I love painting and drawing and art. I don't need people to know my name left and right to be happy." She takes out her binder from the bag and slips her paper in. "Just let Mr. Andrews put your work up on display."

Killian sighs. "But can you at least let me give you the recognition you deserve, love?" he asks, his brows creased together. "Because honestly, your work is eye-catching, beautiful, and really outstanding."

She doesn't respond - just smiles and gives him silent appreciation.

"It's the last party of the year, Emma, come on!" Ruby exclaims, encouraging her. "One night. Tonight."

"I don't do parties, Ruby," she sighs, "you know that."

"You might not, but everyone else does. It's open to every student on campus."

"Fine, fine, since there's no way I can convince you to stop trying to bribe me into going." She grabs her bag, flinging it across one shoulder. "Just text me the details, and then knock on the door and we can go together. Does that sound good?"

Ruby practically squeals, "Hell yeah."

She's gotten herself into a mess, but it's always like that with Ruby. The thing is, she's usually ditched on parties before, always focusing on her work, but this is the last one of the year, last of her college days (except the summer cottage thing with her friends), and she supposes it's the least she can do in order to honour her friendship.

It's just a matter of hoping that Ruby and Victor don't end up in some corner making out, rather than actually enjoying the activities of socializing with other friends.

She tells Killian all about what's going on, but he says he's staying in for a quiet night instead of a loud one. If she knew any earlier, she could have used him as an excuse to not attend the party, but then Ruby probably would have tried to convince her and Killian to go. She just decides to spend the rest of her time before the party with Killian, opting for a quick movie.

Her phone goes off by the end of the movie, saying there's half an hour before they leave. "Well, what to do for the next half an hour?" she wonders, leaning her head on his shoulder. "YouTube? Another movie?"

"Unfinished movies ruin the mood, so let us watch some YouTube then," he mumbles, opening up chrome on his laptop.

Just as she's climbing off the bed, there's a series of knocks at the door that are clearly Ruby's. Killian opens the door and greets her as Emma grabs her jacket and phone. Unlike Ruby, she is not dressed in anything fancy or revealing - then again, it is Ruby.

"Have fun, love," he murmurs, pressing his lips against hers for a sweet little kiss. "Call if you need anything."

"Yeah, I know. And I'll try." She smiles, saving goodbye as he closes the door and trails behind Ruby.

Ruby continues on about how adorable they are as a couple, how Killian really likes her and pretty much everything she's already aware of. But, she lets her spew out whatever is on her mind anyway, and Emma simply nods and hums in response until she finally shuts up when they arrive at the destination. Students are all piling inside of the large pub, talking and laughing and just hanging out as it's finally nearing the end of the year. Another week, and everyone will finally be free. Excluding graduation of course, god, it's going to be exciting, but embarrassing all the same.

The both of them meet Victor at the bar, and surprisingly, he's talking to Mary Margaret and David. Usually, neither of them go out to large events like this, but it seems like even they were persuaded enough to join in on the fun.

She lives for the moments she can have for now, talking, laughing - just pure happiness with friends. Although her mind drifts off to Killian sometimes, she can still keep herself going on the conversations they have. She orders her drink and then goes back to talking, snorting at the story Ruby tells about how Victor once tripped over the stairs because he wasn't "paying attention."

When her drink is given to her, she lets the cool liquid flush down her throat. Stings, but relieving none the less. Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea in the first place - maybe it was just her own fears clouding her judgement of attending a gathering like this. Everyone seems to be minding their own business anyways, so it's not like she's being tormented by being forced to converse with unfamiliar people from around campus.

About half an hour or so later, unexpectedly, she begins to feel a slight flash of disorientation. Pinching the bridge of her nose slowly and squeezing her eyes shut, she tries to push out the feeling, assuming it's nothing but a simple headache that'll pass by quickly. Boy, is she wrong.

"Hey, are you okay?"

"Emma?"

… David?

"Emma!"

"Someone call Killian!"

She blinks once. Twice. Fifty times. A hundred times. But everything is blurry, and she's feeling somewhat nauseous, and what the fuck is going on? She's literally swimming through her mind right now, and she's trying to hang onto the edge, but she's got a lack of control for her own body at the moment, and the second she thinks about staying conscious, she actually does the contrary and falls unconscious instead.

All she really knows is that she does not like this feeling.

A/N: This chapter is short, I know, but it's setting up the next couple, so bear with me? And apologies that the shortest chapter is the chapter that I update with after like a month.