I am still trying to process the information that Gale has just told me, there are a million different things running through my mind as i examine my surroundings, it smells of a hospital, not the comforting smell of my house where i usually get treated, that was was of course before the games, but at this point everything good in my life was before the games, all except Peeta. Just thinking of him makes me want to cry, i bring my hands to my face to make sure im not actually crying, just thinking of what the Capitol is doing to him, or already has done to him. While Peeta is my main concern right now i cant help but let my mind spin at the thought of district 12 being gone, nothing but rubble. Everything i loved was there, everything about who i am was because of that district, it was also the remains of my father i had, and that i will now never get back thanks to the Capitol, it always takes and destroys the things i love, no not the capitol, president Snow. Gale goes to open his mouth again but closes it quickly. "What is it Gale?" he is very quite, it automatically makes me think, no, not think but know that it has something to do with Peeta. "You need to tell me"

"When you were being treated they found something, something that i dont think your aware of" i get quite and disappointed of the fact that it isn't that Peeta was safely rescued and on his way to district 13 now

"What is it?" he cant look me in the eyes when he says it, and he mostly mumbles through it and i still dont understand how i can hear him but i do

"Katniss, your pregnant" im in disbelief, how can this be? i have only had sex once in my life, and that's when i automatically know who the father is, i have only been with one person intimately and thats Peeta

Flashback

I say the words before i can even think about what they will mean to him and what they mean for us, or if i have meant them in the way that he thinks i did. they just come pouring out of me, just seven words that mean so much "I just want to be with you" i sit up as he is laying down on his back, one arm wrapped protectively around me, the other behind his head. i linger above him and i can see him smile up at me, my heart flutters at this and impulsively i break the separation between us and kiss him, really kiss him. its the first time we have kissed when cameras haven't been around and i cant help but savor the moment, a private thought for me alone. he pulls back and his smile quickly fades "Katniss you dont have to do this" i am hurt that he said something like this, of all moments

"But i want to" and i kiss him again before he can say anything else, as i pull off his shirt we stop kissing and he looks me in the eyes, and i look back into his, the same eyes i had looked into years earlier when he saved my life, my boy with the bread. his hands rest on the collar of my shirt, his eyes asking permission to a question that he should already know the answer to already, he should know by now that i will willingly oblige, but he asks anyway and thats how i know hes still the same blue eyed boy who fell in love with my singing and just little less than a year earlier was afraid that the games would change him, and thats when i know they didnt change him, and i thank whatever god there might be out there for this, for persevering him and for not letting anyone change him.

"Umm... can i? is this okay?" i laugh slightly and nod, he pulls off my shirt in a quick fluid motion and brushes some hair away from my eyes, when the spell of mesmerization breaks i can finally look down at him and take it all in, all i can think about is how beautiful he is. suddenly i get very self conscious of the fact that i could never compare to his beauty, he looks at me, taking me in and im tempted to quickly grab my shirt and walk out the door, pretending like this never happened, until he says one word that makes everything okay "Beautiful, god your so beautiful" i melt as he kisses my neck. i take off my bra and then undo his pants. i can feel the strength of his muscles the whole time and thast why im so surprised at how gentle he is. when its over i just focus on his breathing and the beating of his heart in his chest against mine as we lay intertwined together. soon the spell is broken and everything else is suddenly put back into perspective and i realize whats ahead for not only be but for both of us. as we get dressed i can feel the weight of the possibility, no the certainty of the fact that the only one of us will walk out this time, and that one wont be me, maybe thats why i just did this? i dont have time to think about that right now, i have to focus all my energy on saving him. he walks over to me and kisses my forehead "We should probably get going" i nod in agreement, he is about to walk away when i pull him back and kiss him, more passionately then i ever have before. i pull away and say

"I will see you there okay?" he nods and we go our separate ways. all the way to meet Haymitch i keep thinking of all the possible situations about how to get Peeta to leave me behind when the time comes, especially after that, but nows not the time

Flashback End

I think back to that time and feel so guilty, i promised i would do everything in my power to get him out and i didnt, i failed him. i guess i did get a part of him out though, my hand instinctively goes to my stomach, part of Peeta is still with me, now and forever. Gale brekas both the silence and my train of thought

"The baby is his, isnt it" he dosent even have to clarify who the 'he' that he is referring to, i can tell from the hatred and disgust thats in his voice that we both already know the answer to his question, that sounded more like a statement. he dosent give me time to answer, my silence is like confessing and giving every intimate detail of that moment to him, he cant even look at me as he exits, leaving me with my hand still on my stomach and my thoughts filled with my boy with the bread and yet another thing he has given me.

"