The Golden Everett Interpretation

Author: Prospero Hibiki

Disclaimer: The Big Bang Theory characters are the property of Chuck Lorre, Bill Prady, the CBS Network, and the actors who portray them. In no way are these aforementioned characters being used for my own personal profit, and this is not meant as an infringement of the copyright owned by any of the above entities.

Timeline: N/A Due to extreme AU But probably before series

Spoilers: Maybe?

Classification: AU

Rating: M (No clue but just to be safe)

Summary: In one reality Dr. Sheldon Cooper began to interact with the rest of humanity because Leonard Hofstadter moved into his apartment. The Many Worlds Interpretation indicates that elsewhere this task may have fallen to someone else.

Author's Comments: This is going to be...different. Don't expect things to happen the way you expect them to. These characters are different than you remember because things happened differently. And I swear if someone starts screaming "That's not canon!" or "_ would NEVER do that!" I will turn this fic around and we're all going home!

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"The Discouraged Vegas Deviation"

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Sheldon sipped at his lemonade while he sat at one of the Bellagio's many blackjack tables. It was early on in his third day in Vegas and he was bored. Once again he was managing to maintain his standing balance of exactly seven hundred and thirty dollars in chips without much thought. He must admit, even if only to himself, that it had proven more difficult than it had during his previous trips to the self proclaimed "City of Sin." Something that just goes to show that emotions have no place in the life of a Homo Novus. Imagine, Dr Sheldon Cooper B.S., M.S., M.A., Ph.D., Sc.D. Allowing himself to get distracted from something as simple as observation and deducing basic probabilities.

The truth was that he was still somewhat unsettled by the reprimand he'd gotten from President Seibert before the man had forced him to take the week off. Sheldon still failed to see how he was in the wrong. How could he have "failed to uphold the good reputation of the university" with to his comments to the donor? Clearly it was his responsibility as a member of the faculty in good standing to comment in such a situation. Giving a mental shrug he put the situation out of his mind, for the moment anyway, since past evidence showed that it wasn't going to leave him alone for long. Complex social situations with no correct answer such as this were why he avoided those fund raisers in the first place.

Looking around while the dealer started a new hand, Sheldon's attention was drawn to a young woman of approximately his age that was wandering randomly around as if looking for something or someone.

"And a blackjack for the gentleman." The dealer's announcement returned his attention to the table. Where it seemed that he was the gentleman in question.

"Curses!" Now he'd managed to win another hundred dollars.

Sheldon sighed and told the dealer to collect his chips into the storage tray he'd brought with him to the table while he sanitized his hands throughly. There was no telling what germs he'd picked up from handling the chips already.

Just then he heard some voices get loud enough to hear over the din of the casino. Two people were shouting at one another inside an alcove in the nearby wall which lead to a small maintenance closet based on the sign by the door. He was a rather large man who stood at full head over his smaller companion. She was the same blonde woman he'd seen searching for someone earlier. Sheldon could only suppose that she had been looking for her current companion, and given his currently disheveled state with lipstick marring his face that did not match hers, she was not pleased with what she discovered.

Later Sheldon wouldn't be able to say what had caused him to approach the arguing pair, but he would be able to say at what point he'd decided to intervene. When the rather thuggish male raised his hand to slap his companion Sheldon was standing close enough to grab it and slow the swing down enough for the woman to duck under it and back out of reach.

"In Texas we don't take to people hittin' women." So enraged by what he'd seen only a small part of Sheldon's mind noticed how thick his usually suppressed accent was.

As he stared hard at the man he mentally braced himself for the pain that was sure to come from picking a fight with a person at least twice his weight. He also reflected that this was the second time he'd found himself in an unpalatable situation due to the rather quaint Texas Christian morality he thought he'd left behind in Galveston.

"Well in Nebraska we just castrate them and walk away." The voice did not in fact come from the hulking behemoth in front of him but rather from the young woman he'd though he'd rescued. Apparently she hadn't needed rescuing because her right knee was currently planted deep in the giant's crotch in a manner that made Sheldon himself wince in sympathetic pain.

"I think I'll make a point of not angering Nebraska in the future."

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Three hours later Sheldon began to realize that being a Homo Novus might have some drawbacks that he had not forseen. Perhaps if he had been less highly evolved than he was he would have more seriously considered chewing through his arm instead of abandoning the plan because of the high likelihood of passing out due to blood loss before it was fully severed.

The reason for his desire for escape?

The blonde he had rescued, Penny Queen, had firmly latched on to his arm as she recounted her the history of her disastrous relation ship with the Neanderthal that was her now ex-boyfriend. This retelling had been broken up by the imbibing of a copious amount of alcohol on her part while he attempted to ignore her by maintaining his funds at exactly seven hundred and thirty dollars. Unfortunately again her presence was distracting him enough that he was instead managing to continue winning even when he no longer desired to.

Once more diverting his attention to the table he examined his new apparent companion. Viewing her objectively he was forced to acknowledge that she was indeed aesthetically pleasing to the eye. She appeared for the most part symmetrical and her limbs were an example of the classical golden mean, unless subsequent measurements proved his estimations incorrect. Not that he was planning to perform those measurements.

Because he wasn't.

At all.

Still as much as he attempted to ignore her Sheldon found he just couldn't. Perhaps it was the common ground of growing up in a rural community. Or maybe the fact they both now lived in Pasadena, though she fully admitted she was now going to have to find a new place to live since she had no doubt that Kurt would kick her out after kneeing him in the balls and having him thrown out of the casino. It might have even been that there was the possibility, however slight it may be, that he was slightly attracted to her.

Still it was all pointless speculation on his part because sooner or later she would go away and he would be able to get on with his forced vacation in solitude.

He resolutely ignored that little piece of himself that didn't want her to leave and in fact had been what had prevented him from even hinting she do so.

"I need a new drink! Sheldon, would you like something? I'm going to get a Long Island Iced Tea."

"Oh, I do like iced tea. I'll have one of those."

At least she wasn't having more alcohol.

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End "The Discouraged Vegas Deviation"

Chapter Notes: Well this is a pretty standard prologue. I've set things up in a fairly predictable way. Not going to apologize for this. By the way in case anyone didn't figure it out from the summary this occurs prior to Sheldon meeting Leonard. He also has no current roommate. So this Sheldon will be somewhat different than the one you know and or expect.

Oh and this is totally an attempt to lure Risknight back to the darkside.

Come back to us Risknight...We have cookies.