Jack caught the set of Ianto's jaw and knew at once he was in trouble. In his defense, the quick improvising had saved pretty much all of the UK and possibly all of Europe from aliens attempting to detonate nuclear devices… but at the cost of some sticky duct tape residue on the SUV's mirror.

It was going to take some equally quick thinking to placate Ianto, especially since he'd just had that clay treatment done to the SUV's exterior.

He'd made it halfway through the greenhouse when Ianto caught up to him with a stern, "Jack."

"Have I ever told you how good that shirt looks on you?" Jack said, turning with a broad smile.

Ianto's glower remained fixed, now with an added raised brow.

Jack only barely kept himself from nervously nibbling at his lower lip. "Especially with that tie!" he added quickly. Jack knew he was good at charming his way out of a fix but damn if Ianto didn't have an incredible capacity for resistance and restraint. "In fact…," Jack continued, shifting into cheeky-and-seductive mode, "I was kinda thinking… red leather would be a hell of a look on -"

"Gaffer tape, Jack. It's called gaffer tape. It's like duct tape, only it releases cleanly, and does not leave the wing mirror disconcertingly sticky. And there are two rolls of it in the SUV at all times."

It took everything Jack had to keep from chuckling at Ianto's adorable fussiness, because that would definitely not get him any sort of favours, leather or otherwise, for quite a long time. He needed to choose his next words very carefully….

"I'm sorry," Jack said, ducking his chin and pouting and doing his best to sound as contrite as possible. There… Ianto's jaw was unclenching already. "Hot water and soap will…." Oh, shit! The piercing stare! "I mean – tell me what soap you think I should use, and I'll take care of it as soon as possible."

"You'll find it in the supply closet. Just let me know if you need a map," Ianto said shortly, then turned on his tidy, polished heel and deposited the CB radio on Jack's desk.

Jack briefly wondered what coming back to life after nuclear holocaust would have been like and decided it was only marginally more frightening a prospect than the wrath of Ianto Jones. He also wondered if treating Ianto – privately – to the same spa-level of treatment that Ianto treated the SUV would get him back in good graces within the next decade or so.