The Flight of the Idiots

-one-shot-

A/N: *bangs head repeatedly on keyboard* Be warned, I know nothing about planes or flying. Or anything, if we're being honest. Happy Birthday Mia!

Disclaimer: Naruto belongs to Masashi Kishimoto and TV Tokyo

-beta'd by 420luver-

The heavy wheels of his black Lockheed Martin F-22 Raptor hitting the field ground hard, the raven roughly bounced in his harness. He grimaced as the straps of his seat and protective gear dug into his shoulders painfully. Coasting the aircraft into his designated lane, he reached over and flipped several silver switches on his right. He touched the neon green screens mounted around him, shutting the engines off. The familiar sounds of powerful turbines powering down sounded muted to his ears. "I have landed and am dismounting." He affirmed over the radio inside his flight helmet, talking to the ones directing his flight path. "Pilot Uchiha Sasuke reporting at base."

The sun glinting off his midnight black visor, Sasuke reached up with a gloved hand and pushed the thick plastic shield up. Obsidian eyes narrowed and glared as the sun landed on them, momentarily blinding him. Separating the oxygen tube attaching him to the plane, he then undid the leather straps that were holding the bone dome to his head. Pulling it off, he opened the hatch and stood slowly, appreciating the nice rush of fresh morning air that ruffled his head. He glanced around him, taking in the other expensive and shiny planes lined up neatly beside his. Other pilots were milling around, stretching and socializing after the morning's routine.

The sun was just barely coming up, spreading golden rays across the world around him. The thick smell of jet fuel filled his nose, mixing in with the scent of pancakes and something meaty. His stomach grumbled slightly, reminding him of his light breakfast before the drill. Ignoring his body's needs and closing his eyes, Sasuke lifted his head slightly, wanting nothing more than to close the hatch and take off again. This time preferably with no inane chit-chat filling his radio. Especially his stupid talking... There was only one downside to his love of flight, but as long as he didn't pay it any attention, it didn't matter. Sasuke's appreciation quickly dimmed when he heard another familiar voice ruin his mood.

"Sasuke! That was so cool!"

Sighing, Sasuke opened his eyes and glanced down to see Sakura Haruno, a fellow pilot, smiling and waving up at him. She quickly grabbed a nearby rolling stepladder and wheeled it up to his wing.

Not bothering to return the greeting, Sasuke stepped out onto the opposite wing of his plane and ignored the ladder, choosing to brace himself on the edge of the wing and hop down. Subtle signs didn't seem to work with her so he opted to blatantly be rude and dismiss her advances outrigh. It wasn't his fault she didn't appeal to him; that was all her doing. He didn't find stalking and other annoying characteristics attractive whatsoever.

"Sasuke." Sakura admonished, peeved he didn't accept her help. Her lips thinned when the cold raven didn't acknowledge her. Persistent, she sidled up to him, getting close enough that her shoulder brushed his. "You were great out there you know. The way you fly is just soo incredible. Maybe you could give me lessons?"

"If you think that was incredible, you should see what I can do!" A loud, brass voice chimed in, coming from behind them. The raven and rosette both paused to turn around and stare at the one shouting behind them.

Naruto Uzumaki jammed a thumb onto his chest, puffing it out slightly. Decked out in a standard grey uniform with a patch of an orange swirl on his shoulder, he placed both hands on his hips. "Stick-up-his-ass over there can't fly for shit. If you want, I'll even teach you what I know." He offered, shooting the pink-haired girl a wide grin. He pointedly ignored the raven, knowing it would rile him. Although, that didn't stop him from darting a glance at said male.

"Tch. You call that flying?" Sasuke scoffed, regarding the blond as one would stare at dog shit on their brand new shoes. "Hn, you would be deluded enough to think that you're any good." He smirked, tilting his head up slightly.

"The fuck you say Uchiha?" Naruto growled, his good mood gone instantaneously. He moved in, walking past Sakura and standing face to face with Sasuke. Azure skies burned into obsidian black holes, not backing down.

"Deaf as well." Sasuke remarked sarcastically, vaguely wondering why this encounter happened nearly every day. "It's a wonder they even accepted you." He leaned in a little, getting right in Naruto's face. He could count the number of faint freckles that dotted Naruto's nose.

"Still trying to follow in brother dearest's footsteps are you? How's it like knowing you'll never be as good?" Naruto bit back, pressing sensitive buttons. While he gained no physical reaction from the other pilot, he knew Sasuke well enough to know he was pissed. A crowd had begun to gather around them, consisting of the other pilots and their friends. There were few calls to stop, but neither of them budged. If he were to move closer, his nose would touch Sasuke's.

"Better than being abandoned on the street like a sack of shit. Oh wait, my mistake. That's where trash belongs." Sasuke answered scathingly, taking a bat to Naruto's buttons like an eager kid at a piñata. While Naruto's comment did sting, it wasn't something he dwelled on. But he had the burning urge to hurt the blond, to force him to submit and know his place beneath the Uchiha. He knew he hit the jackpot when Naruto's eyes darkened and narrowed.

Naruto's lips curled into a snarl. "You take that back, you fucker!" He'd gone too far. He put up with a lot of Sasuke's shit, but no one mentioned his past and got away with it. He saw red as Sasuke merely smirked condescendingly at him, knowing he'd won the verbal war. He reached up with both hands and shoved the raven hard, taking satisfaction in the way he stumbled.

Getting his balance quickly, Sasuke moved forward and shoved the blond back equally as hard. Naruto staggered back, reeling a bit. Angry, he contorted his hand into a fist and moved to sink it into Sasuke's smug face. A dark hand moved in and grabbed his hand before it could make contact.

"Naruto! Sasuke! What have I told you about acting like school children on the base?" Second lieutenant Iruka Umino shouted, shoving the two men apart and stepping between them. Crossing his arms he glared at them, tired of the constant bickering between the two.

"Asshat over there started it." Naruto sulked, not liking getting yelled at by his father figure. He bowed his head a little, feeling ashamed under Iruka's intense scrutiny. The brunette had one hell of a glare. Out of the corner of his eye, he sent Sasuke as disdainful a dirty look he could manage.

"You were the one to call out to me, idiot." Sasuke replied, shooting the blond an equally cruel look.

Iruka sighed, reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose as he closed his eyes and shook his head. "I've told you already, if this keeps up, you're both being suspended. I will personally be the one to force you to take leave." Iruka's hand shot up, stopping the duo from responding like he knew they would. "If I see any more fighting between the two of you, both of you are done. We have another set of drills to run and I expect you both to be on your best behaviors. Am I clear?"

"Iruka, wait, you-"

"….hn."

"I said, am I clear?" Iruka repeated, his voice rising. He opened his eyes and glared at the two, getting his message across.

"Loud and clear, sir." Sasuke and Naruto replied in unison, standing up a little straighter. It was considered almost treason to go against their commanding officer's words.

"Good. Get to the mess hall for some lunch. We have a long day ahead of us."

Iruka turned on his heel and left, knowing it wouldn't be long until he was called again to stop them. He didn't want to punish them, but their brash actions usually ended up dragging more pilots into the fray and causing unnecessary rifts between the ranks. He was a little worried their bickering would elevate, but he hoped nothing like that happened.

xXx

Naruto kicked a pebble around, still pissed. He would have loved nothing more than running over to the raven and smashing his pretty little face in, painting that white skin black and blue. His voice, his looks, his stupid smirk; they all just served to piss him off and send him into a rage. Sasuke never failed to anger him. It was well known among the others to keep them separate, but when they happened to see each other, it was like World War III. They had managed to get into fights multiple times, with each holding their own record of wins and losses. Being a loss behind Sasuke, Naruto burned to rectify the score and for once and for all, show the raven he was not one to mess with.

They had been at each other's throats since they'd met in the training academy. Like water and oil, they did not mix. It didn't help that the only girl he sought after was attracted to the pale freak. Nearly every girl on base wanted the Uchiha, excluding some who were in relationships. Sasuke didn't even deserve them. He never talked to any of the girls and was outright mean to them. It didn't make sense that they'd go for the shitty bastard over someone as sweet and hot as him.

Stealing glances at the raven, Naruto's mouth curled into a scowl. Stupid smug bastard.

"Take a picture, it'll last longer." Sasuke snapped. He could feel Naruto's burning gaze on his skin and it bothered him how aware he was of the blond. Dark eyes glowered at the shorter man.

"I don't have a camera with an ugly setting, sorry." Naruto snapped back, feeling the familiar anger once again bubbling under his skin. He wanted nothing more than to sink his fists into Sasuke, but Iruka's words rang in his head and he resisted.

"Look in the mirror for something ugly." Sasuke growled, feeling his temper rising. Leave it to Naruto to piss him off multiple times in one day.

"Why, are you gonna pop out like Bloody Mary? Do I need to say your name three times as well?" Naruto challenged, itching to get Sasuke riled enough to fight him. That way it'd be his fault and he'd be safe.

"Naruto stop being so rude! It's not Sasuke's fault that you can't control your temper." Sakura chastised the blond, reaching over and decking him in the arm. She turned and smiled sweetly at Sasuke who was still staring at Naruto. Why did he always look at him and not at her?

"Why're you defending him?" Naruto yelped as he was hit, immediately backing up and nursing his arm. While it didn't look like she could hit, Sakura could pack a punch and unfortunately for him, he was usually on the receiving end. "He can defend himself."

"Grow up." Sakura sighed, feeling disappointed when Sasuke turned and walked away, leaving her alone with Naruto. "Look, now you've made him go away."

"I don't see what you like about him. All he does is skulk about and be an asshole to everyone. Sure he's pretty, but his bitchy personality ruins it." Naruto griped, watching the raven disappearing into the building. He had the strangest urge to call Sasuke back, but likened it to wanting to rile him up again.

"He's so mysterious and dreamy. He doesn't talk to anyone but …you." Sakura said accusingly, eyeing the blond. "He won't even look at me."

"All the more reason to let him go and give me a chance." Naruto grinned, winking at the girl.

"Ha, as if." She said snippily, raising her nose a bit. "Sasuke and I were meant to be together."

Naruto inwardly winced. Something cold settled in his stomach and soured his mood. He hid his feelings behind a wide smile and laughed. "Yea, I can see the mutual love there." He said sarcastically.

"You can?" Sakura looked up at him with wide sea foam green eyes, a hopeful look on her face. "Really? See, he and I are meant to be."

Not wanting to hurt his friend, Naruto nodded, having a harder time keeping the smile on his face. His cheeks were hurting with the effort. "Yea…"

With the happiest smile he'd ever seen on her, Sakura excused herself and ran off, most likely to find Sasuke. Dropping the smile, Naruto frowned. Why was it Sasuke that always got everything he wanted? The asshole was going to do nothing but cause Sakura pain. Why couldn't she see that? Why the fuck was Sasuke so special?

Irate, Naruto turned toward the building on the field and jogged towards it. He needed to cool down before he hunted the raven down and carved him a new one. While he'd love to beat the man senseless, he knew Iruka would do worse to him. His immense respect and fear of his father figure was the only thing holding him back.

He found his best friend Kiba Inuzuka lounging around on a sofa in the entertainment room, lazily flipping through the channels. "You look pissed." Kiba remarked, glancing up at the blond. "You meet up with Sasuke?"

"He and I nearly got at it this morning." Naruto snorted, dropping down on the sofa and shoving Kiba's legs out the way. "Iruka found us though and nothing happened."

"Jesus, you two should just fuck and get it over." Kiba groaned, sitting up. "It's not even exciting to hear about a fight anymore since most of the time it's you and Sasuke trying to prove who's the alpha male."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Naruto growled, lost.

"Sasuke's been after your ass since day one and you're too oblivious to see it. He's fucking stupid too, since I don't even think he knows it. God, you both are just as hard headed as fuck."

"Are you saying that Sasuke likes me?" Naruto asked incredulously. "What?"

"Oh don't act so surprised. As if you don't go after him all the time too."

"I like Sakura." Naruto insisted, feeling panicky. "Not Sasuke."

"Keep telling yourself that. It's pretty clear she's into you, too." Kiba snorted derisively. "But who's the one you always talk about? Sasuke. Who's the one that always pisses you off? Sasuke. Who's the one that you're forever trying to impress? Sasuke." The brunette yawned. "Everyone but you three can see it. Sakura's delusional and you and Sasuke are just stupid. You guys probably managed to beat all of the common sense out of each other."

"You're wrong…" Naruto floundered. Sasuke liked him? What? But they hated each other! Sasuke couldn't even stand him! And he liked Sakura, he was into girls!

"Tell you what, there's one way to prove me wrong." Kiba sat up, raising an eyebrow at the look of shock and disbelief on Naruto's face.

"What? How?" Naruto yelped, grabbing Kiba by the shoulders and shaking him. "How?"

"You just have to k-" Kiba winced as his phone suddenly erupted into a loud song. "Shit, that's Ino's tone. I've got to go."

"Wait, you can't leave me hanging!" Naruto yelled, trying to grab onto Kiba's arm to hold him back.

A little gleeful, Kiba moved away and quickly patted Naruto's shoulder. "I'm sure you'll figure it out." Laughing, he jogged away, leaving Naruto in the room alone.

Sasuke liked him, but he liked Sakura, who liked Sasuke. What the actual fuck. How had this happened? Was it even true? How could he prove it? Did he want to prove it? Naruto's face reddened as he pictured confronting Sasuke about it. What if he was wrong? Sasuke would never talk to him again… More than anything, he'd hate that. What should he do? I'd be mortifying to ask the raven, but he had no choice…

xXx

Back in the skies, everything seemed to melt away. Surrounded by bright blue and the warm sun, nothing bothered him. Not Kiba's words, not the fact that base didn't have ramen, and not even Sasuke's shitty attitude. This was his haven, where he was alone and away from the problems of everyday life.

Flying in a tight V formation, Naruto was part of a platoon of six. He wasn't familiar with all the other pilots, but he knew that himself, Sasuke, Iruka, and a female pilot named Karin were all flying today. The other two were a taller man with physics-defying silver hair and some guy with waist-length brown hair with creepy eyes.

Grinning cheekily, Naruto broke the formation and steered his F-16 up into some clouds, watching as the blue sky gave way to fluffy clouds around him. His jet bounced a bit as it sliced through the white mass. He glanced down in time to see the other planes continue on without him, flying smoothly beneath the clouds.

"We've lost visual on Uzumaki. Uzumaki report." A voice crackled on his radio, cutting into the silence.

Naruto sighed. "Uzumaki here. Just took a detour." He tilted the control stick to the side, watching as the world turned sideways a little and he lost altitude fast. He dropped out of the clouds and back down a few feet quickly.

"Stay on path, Naruto." Iruka's familiar voice came on, holding a tone of warning.

"Yea, ye-OH SHIT!." Jamming the stick to the side, Naruto was slammed into the side of the plane as another fighter jet streaked past his own, seemingly coming out of nowhere. The radar on his dash screamed to life, warning him a tad too late that another plane was in proximity.

Almost going into a spin, Naruto jerked his plane back, right side up. Getting on the comm system, he twisted the dial and yelled at the pilot, staring bullets at the hull. He sped up, intent on seeing who was in the cock pit.

"Oi you son of a bitch, watch where the fuck you're going!"

"How about watching your screens and not coming out of some fucking clouds on top of me." A familiar voice answered smoothly.

"Sasuke you asshole!" Naruto yelled. "You almost sent me into a spin!"

"Learn how to be a pilot for christ's sake." Sasuke retorted, his deep voice crackling over the comm. "Stay on in the formation you moron."

"Oh hell no, you asked for it." Naruto shut off communications and peeled away from Sasuke, ignoring the blinking light that someone else was communicating with him. He gunned the engine, getting ahead of the other planes and Sasuke, breaking formation. Once he was ahead, he slowed down a bit, making sure to be right in front of Sasuke's. Picturing the raven's reaction with a gleeful smile, Naruto dropped speed, moving right into Sasuke's space rapidly.

Almost immediately, Sasuke's plane plunged down, forced to move or they would have crashed. As soon as it moved out the way, Naruto settled into the space he left. Snickering, he turned on the comm system back on, using the private lines.

"-ucking piece of shit! Goddamit Naruto!"

"Learn how to be a pilot for christ's sake." Naruto mocked, not seeing the other man's plane anymore. He glanced at the largest of a trio of screens in front of him, finding the moving green dot that signaled a plane now underneath him. Azure eyes narrowed suspiciously.

"You asked for it, idiot. Don't come crying to me when your license is revoked."

Ending the communication line, Sasuke glanced up, seeing Naruto's plane above his own. He knew very well that he'd end up getting in trouble as well, but his pride wouldn't allow him to back down from the obvious challenge. Tilting the stick towards his body, he kept his gaze up, watching as he neared the F-16 bit by bit.

The blip noted him that Sasuke's plane had gotten even closer. "Ha, asshole you think you can scare me?" Naruto snorted. He responded by increasing speed, once more breaking out of the formation. He shot forward, leaving all the others behind in a tail of smoke. He peeked at the screen and noted in astonishment that Sasuke had reciprocated and was still right underneath him, still steadily getting closer.

"Hn. Trying to get away?"

Sasuke murmured. The corner of his mouth twitched as he almost smiled. He pushed his plane to go further, shooting ahead of Naruto. Instead of mimicking Naruto's own move for the sake of rubbing it in, Sasuke yanked the throttle to him. He launched upward, streaking towards space in a tight spin. Craning his head to the side, he wasn't surprised to see Naruto jetting up, trying to out match him. He sliced past a thick layer of clouds, drifting further and further up. The clouds were soon far below him, leaving nothing to hide the sun from blasting into his dome.

xXx

Back on the ground, Sakura looked up to see two jets break away from the formation and begin to fly recklessly around. They shot off fast, soon disappearing from sight. She didn't even need to guess to know who piloted the two planes. "The idiots. They're going to get in trouble." She bit her lip. That meant Sasuke too.

"They at it again?" A voice came from her side. Turning around, she spotted Kiba loitering around.

"They are." She sighed, shaking her head. "Iruka warned them, but they didn't listen."

"When have they every listened?" Kiba snorted. He glanced up, squinting as he spotted the jets locked in a race. He raised his hands and placed them behind his head. "It's always the same thing with them. Naruto does something stupid to show off, and then Sasuke has to one-up him. Then Naruto has to try to one-up him, and so on."

"It wouldn't happen if Naruto just stopped messing with Sasuke." Sakura muttered, crossing her arms. "If he left him alone, Sasuke wouldn't do that and he wouldn't get in trouble."

Kiba turned to her and cocked his head, an incredulous look on his face. "You're a special kind of stupid, aren't you?"

Insulted, Sakura's mouth dropped open and she immediately punched Kiba. "Hey asshole, who're you calling stupid?" She yelled.

Fending off more hits, Kiba ducked and weaved, focusing on protecting his man bits. "Sakura, it's pretty damn obvious Sasuke has no intention of getting into your pants. Or any girls pants, for that matter.

"What the hell do you know, Kiba?" Sakura growled, blushing. She stopped her attacks and wrapped her arms around herself. "For your information, even Naruto can see Sasuke and I have something special. You're just being a little difficult."

"Difficult my ass. The only pants Sasuke wants to get into is Naruto's." Kiba braced himself for one last attack, but was relieved when none came.

Sakura had frozen. "What."

xXx

"Sasuke…" Naruto growled, grinding his teeth and keeping his eyes trained on Sasuke's plane. He soon reached Sasuke's height, both planes in the same altitude. A quick glance at the dials on his screen told him that they were pretty high up. The engines roaring, Naruto tilted the plane slightly, crowding Sasuke's. "Not really impressive, Sasuke." Naruto drawled. "You let little old me catch up."

"Maybe that's what I wanted, moron." Sasuke replied, gauging the distance between planes before deciding on a move. He adjusted his screens and reached over the panel on his right. Flipping a small switch, he placed one hand up on the thick plastic hatch above his head and braced himself. "Just watch and learn."

Dropping speed at a dangerous pace, Sasuke twisted the throttle and brought his plane to Naruto's side before beginning to fly circles around him. He increased speed and tightened the circles, drawing precariously near. He grimaced as the straps dug into his shoulder as his jet shuddered with the momentum.

"Oi bastard, you're too close!" Naruto yelled into his mike, fearing for his plane's wings. His head twisted around as he tried to follow Sasuke's path around his own plane. He tried to follow Sasuke's path on the radar's but the movement was too quick.

"Relax, idiot. Unlike you, I know how to fly." Sasuke insulted the blond, feeling smug that he had frightened him. He peeled back a bit, going upside down and aiming at the ground. He did lazy circles, spinning casually as he waited to see what Naruto would do next. Not seeing any immediate action, he tilted his plane back, aiming up as he increased speed.

"How to fly my ass." Naruto muttered under his breath. He felt like a mouse underneath a cat's paw. It pissed him off. He kept an eye on Sasuke's plane on his screen, waiting. As soon as Sasuke began to move back towards him, Naruto slammed his throttle to the side, his plane flipping upside down before pointing it at where Sasuke's was. Heading down at breakneck pace, Naruto gunned the engines, feeling his plane shudder. A slight nudge to the stick brought his plane directly pointing at Sasuke's.

"First one to break away loses!" Naruto cried, intent on showing just how good his skills were. Licking his lips and swallowing, he gripped the stick tightly, watching the clouds depart and give way to the earth. Miles of a greenish-gray field popped into view, along with the camp and the other planes which had long since landed. Naruto vaguely registered how much trouble they'd be in, but it didn't matter and was quickly drowned out by his concentration on not crashing.

"You want to lose that bad? Hn, you're on." Sasuke agreed over the comm. Stopping his spinning, he straightened out and aimed at Naruto's plane, bringing his arm back down. Ignoring the alarms ringing in his cockpit, Sasuke shoved his throttle down. His eyes narrowed as he shot up.

xXx

"Holy shit, they're going to crash!" Someone shouted, pointing up in the sky and drawing the attention of the other people on the ground.

Ino lifted a hand to shield her eyes as she watched the two jets closing in on each other. One jet was streaking up in a straight line, heading right for the one above him. The roar of the engines was almost deafening, creating strong gusts of wind.

"Should we prepare obituaries?" Sai mused next to her, patting his pockets for paper and a pen. By the way things were looking, neither jet would be able to move out of the way to avoid a head on collision. Sad. Those planes had been expensive.

Ino smiled, sliding her left hand into her jean pocket. She reached up and brushed a strand of wild blond hair behind her ear. "Hmm, not quite yet. As stupid as those idiots are, they're fantastic pilots."

"Not fantastic enough to follow directions. The rest of the group left them behind."

xXx

The closer he got to Sasuke, the more his heart pounded and his hands shook as he tightened them on the throttle. Swallowing the excessive saliva in his mouth, Naruto felt a shiver of excitement run through him. There was no going back. The distance closed away, marked by ticks on a radar.

"Ready to give in, huh Sasuke?!" He yelled into the comm, grinning wildly. "I won't judge you if you chicken out now."

"You wish, dead-last." Sasuke retorted, fighting the urge to smile. Despite hating Naruto's voice invading his flights, he absolutely loved the challenges that Naruto ended up dragging him into. Nothing revved his blood more than out preforming the blond. Although they'd never shot at each other in this way before, he wasn't about to quit.

Three hundred feet. Two fifty. Two hundred. One fifty.

Every foot closer served to pour more adrenaline in to his blood. Naruto felt sweat pour down his temple in exhilaration and in fear. If one of them didn't break away, they'd crash and die. But one had to give. It wasn't going to be him.

Sasuke felt his heart rate skyrocket as he got closer and closer to Naruto. His lips parted slightly as he focused. Just a little further… The thunder from Naruto's aircraft filled his ears, meshing in with the sounds of his own engines.

When their respective planes mere feet away from crashing, Sasuke smirked and twitched his hand, sending his plane gliding right down Naruto's. He had planned to skim down the side and scare the blond into giving up. He hadn't expected Naruto to do the same.

With the shriek of grinding metal, Sasuke's jet took a hard hit. A sharp edge from Naruto's plane dug into his jet's exterior, slicing through like butter and carving up the metal. Immediately, he plummeted. Naruto's jet flew off, unharmed.

Alarms shrieking and red lights flashing, Sasuke swore loudly as his plane began to lose altitude, twirling down to the ground. Cursing Naruto to the ninth ring of hell, Sasuke struggled to gain control. He needed to land, fast. The ground was spinning rapidly towards him, making him thankful for having a light breakfast. His jet shuddered violently as it rocketed down to the earth, jerking and shaking as it went. With a grinding roar, the useless wing completely detached and was left behind.

Watching Sasuke's plane plunge, Naruto felt his heart do the same. Horrified, he veered his jet toward Sasuke's as fast as he could, watching as bits and pieces of the plane's armor broke off. "Fuck, Sasuke! Sasuke, answer me!" He cried into the comm, panicking when an assortment of alarms responded rather than Sasuke's familiar voice. "Goddammit, you better not die, you bastard!" He jammed the jet into its fastest speed, uncaring that there wasn't much he could do.

He held his breath as he watched the raven's jet falter before landing harshly, digging up mounds of dirt as it semi-crash landed. The landing gear was torn off and jammed into the earth as the jet slid into the ground before coasting to a stop. Smoking, it came to a standstill and Naruto could see no movement from inside the hatch.

"Sasuke! Answer me!" He screamed, landing as fast as he could next to Sasuke. Recklessly, the jet bounced and jolted as he forced it to stop. With the engines still powering down, Naruto unbuckled and shoved open the dome and leapt out, stumbling and falling as he ran over to Sasuke's wreck. It was titled dangerously to the side, with the inner machinery exposed from the missing wing. It was a miracle he'd even managed to land it.

The dome to Sasuke's plane hissed open and a familiar figure slowly climbed out. The raven, seemingly unharmed, jumped down the broken wing and onto the field. He reached up and unbuckled his helmet, tossing it carelessly to the ground. He ran a hand through his thick black hair and shook his head.

"Sasuke!" Naruto shouted, ripping off his own helmet and throwing it off to the side. He ran over to him, looking for injures. Seeing no immediate danger, Naruto felt relief flood him. Sasuke was okay!

Once Naruto was in reach, Sasuke drew back his hand and slugged the blond across the face, hard. He smirked in satisfaction when he saw the shock on Naruto's face as he fell back.

"Jesus, fuck! What the fuck was that for asshole!" Naruto shouted, touching his tender cheek. Infuriated and filled with relief that the raven was alright, Naruto leapt up and tackled him. They landed bodily on the ground, digging up grass as they wrestled around.

"You almost killed me you fucking idiot! Look at my jet!" Sasuke howled, kneeing Naruto in the side. He took a mean kick to the thigh when Naruto retaliated, digging his hands into Sasuke's biceps.

"It wasn't my fault!" Naruto moved like a snake and head-butted Sasuke, using the surprise hit to dart away. A hand closed around his ankle, digging in and bringing him down painfully.

Sasuke dragged Naruto back to him, twisting his leg in ways it shouldn't be twisted. "How the fuck was it not your fault? Look at my jet!" Sasuke yelled.

"How the fuck was I supposed to know you were going to move!" Naruto yelled back, kicking Sasuke repeatedly. He winced when Sasuke dropped his leg in favor of his arms. Fighting back, he managed to somehow elbow his kidney.

"What, do you think I was just going let us crash?" Sasuke growled, rolling out of the way as Naruto grabbed onto his uniform. "Fuck you!" The blond moved in faster, latching onto Sasuke's wrist. He quickly tried to let go when Sasuke latched onto his own wrists.

"Fuck you! If you didn't keep trying to show off I wouldn't have to upstage you!" Naruto hollered, punching Sasuke as the other man fought to pin his arms down. Managing to free one, he reached up and planted it across Sasuke's face, trying to shove him away. He felt Sasuke's nose smoosh against his palm before sinking it into black locks and twisting savagely.

"I don't show off!" Sasuke retorted, slapping the blond with the back of his hand. He whacked Naruto's hand away, feeling chunks of his hair come away.

Naruto socked him in the jaw with his fist, knocking his head back with the force. "Of course you do, fucking Uchiha! That's why Sakura is always after you!"

"How's that my fault!" Sasuke shouted, placing his body weight fully on Naruto. He grabbed hold of Naruto's hair and yanked it harshly in retaliation. "I don't like her!"

"Goddammit, I'm just happy you're alive you fucktard!" Naruto yelped, clawing at Sasuke's hand. Struggling to free himself, he bit Sasuke's arm where his sleeve road up and exposed his skin. Azure eyes glared at obsidian orbs, noting how abnormally pale Sasuke was. Had Sasuke been scared? The unflappable Uchiha afraid?...it was sort of scary to imagine the raven as afraid. It caused a twinge in his chest that hitched his breathing a bit.

The grip on his hair tightened and pulled his head back even further, cutting off their intense glaring match. Naruto cracked open his jaw, freeing Sasuke's arm when he tasted copper. "Ow, lemme go!" He shouted closing his eyes and straining to move out from under Sasuke.

"You idiot." Sasuke sighed, releasing his grip. He relaxed and found himself sitting atop Naruto, right on his hips, basically pinning the other man down. He was breathing heavily, as was Naruto. Sasuke eyed the blond between his legs, noting how vulnerable and sweaty Naruto looked. He glanced down at his arm and frowned at the bleeding crescent mark on his hand. He didn't feel the pain.

His chest heaving, Naruto took in deep breaths, feeling worn out and sore. "Fuck." He panted, reaching up to massage the area Sasuke had been pulling. "Iruka's gonna fucking skin us alive."

"Hn." Sasuke grunted.

"Do you think we could fake our deaths?" Naruto spoke up, peeking up at the raven on top of him. "Run away and hide so no one can find us?" He grinned a bit, knowing he was a dead man once he got back to the base.

"Aren't you going to miss Sakura then?" Sasuke mocked, raising a brow. It ached to move. He was probably all black and blue with bruises and cuts. He reached up and massaged his jaw, opening and closing his mouth as he did. Naruto had hit him hard.

Naruto looked at him for a long moment before he sat up, awkwardly placing Sasuke in his lap. His gaze met Sasuke's head-on, full of something Sasuke couldn't place.

"What?" Sasuke asked, dropping his hand. He moved to get off the idiot's lap but was held fast when Naruto's hands latched onto his hips.

"Sasuke, do you like me?" Naruto asked, completely serious. Seeing as he was a dead man, he could do what he wanted. He needed to know. The only change in Sasuke's face that he noticed was the raven's eyes widening slightly and the lips parting.

"What." Sasuke deadpanned.

"'Cuz Kiba said you did." Naruto licked his lips nervously, suddenly aware of how ludicrous his question was. His heart pounded heavily as he tried to anticipate Sasuke's reaction. This was it.

"Kiba needs to learn to keep his mouth shut." Sasuke muttered, looking off to the side and avoiding Naruto's gaze.

Naruto's eyes widened and his jaw dropped open. "It's true!?" He blushed, letting go of Sasuke's hips. "You? And…and, and me? For real?" His voice shot up a few decibels.

Sasuke snorted. He rolled off the blond and got to his feet, dusting his pants off. He strode over to his jet, eyeing the mess. "As if." He called out disdainfully.

Feeling a pang of disappointment and humiliation, Naruto gritted his teeth and his eyes narrowed into slits. Shoving himself off the ground, he sprinted over to Sasuke and pushed him hard. It was like their fight from earlier was happening all over again. "Fuck me for caring then!"

Fed up with Naruto's antics and getting shoved around, Sasuke grabbed Naruto by the shoulders and slammed him into the plane's side. He smashed their mouths together, feeling something split with the force. Feeling Naruto's mouth open in a cry of shock and pain, Sasuke took advantage of it and shoved his tongue in. His leg forced it's way between Naruto's thighs, giving him room to move in closer. He was hard. Something about fighting Naruto this time had made him rock-fucking-hard.

His heart beating at an incredible pace, Naruto froze as he felt Sasuke's hot tongue in his mouth, running over his teeth and sliding against his own muscle. The tangy taste of blood invaded his mouth, mixing in with the slightly spicy flavor on Sasuke's tongue. He felt something hot pressing into his leg, almost branding him with the heat. He was still frozen when Sasuke left his mouth and trailed open-mouthed kisses over his neck, going down to suck at his jugular. Naruto's head unconsciously tilted back, giving Sasuke more room.

"Is this what you wanted for an answer?" Sasuke growled, nibbling the blond's collar bone sharply. He sank his teeth in, leaving faint marks. Letting go of Naruto's shoulders, Sasuke gripped the front of his uniform tightly and snapped the buttons open with an animalistic yank. "Is this what you want, Naruto?"

"Fuck Sasuke, wait!" Naruto yelled, feeling his body reacting quickly to Sasuke's ministrations. Every time Sasuke's skin touched his, arcs of electricity sizzled between them. He left scorching hot marks on his skin that burned even when he moved away. Blood rushed to his groin, hardening his cock. Holy shit! How the fuck had this happened? His body felt similar to when he'd take flight. It was exhilarating and he didn't want it to stop. He couldn't stop it. His couldn't stop the grinding he was doing on Sasuke's leg, aching for some friction. The moments he got excited around Sakura were nothing compared to this. Who would've known he'd have a secret hard-on for Sasuke? But his pride soon reared its ugly head, demanding that he upstage Sasuke. Tan hands shot up and yanked Sasuke closer, mashing his lips to the raven's. "Fucking asshole." He grunted, closing his eyes.

He bit down on Sasuke's torn bottom lip, forcing the other man to accept him in. Sasuke seemed more than willing as he opened his jaw, thrusting his tongue in before Naruto could enter. Blood mixed with saliva leaked out, running down his chin. He felt Naruto fighting with him, trying to take control.

Sasuke was surprised Naruto was reacting the way he was, but he wasn't about to question it. He'd had a hard on for the blond idiot for years, vainly hoping it would change its mind and find a more suitable partner; it had been all for nothing. Now here he was, hot, horny and making out with the one man he thought he hated. It was funny how life worked.

Pulling Naruto off the plane, Sasuke kicked his leg out and knocked Naruto down, quickly joining him on the grass. Forcing the blond's legs open, Sasuke settled between them. He reached up and began snapping the buttons open on his uniform, one by one.

Impatient and getting the feeling Sasuke was fucking with him, Naruto sat up and ripped open Sasuke's uniform just like Sasuke had done to his own. Sasuke was wearing nothing but a thin wife beater underneath, darkened with sweat in some areas. The flaps of his uniform lay open until his waist, where the edge of his boxers peeked out. He could have been a Calvin Klein underwear model right then and there.

Sasuke arched an eyebrow at Naruto, amused. "Hn." He shoved Naruto's hands away and reached for the other man's uniform, unsnapping the rest of the buttons and exposing the blond's body. He wasn't wearing an undershirt, leaving his toned abs and tanned skin open for Sasuke to hungrily take in. Ripping the outfit even more, he revealed blindingly orange boxers in the shape of a tent. The tip was already damp and sticky.

"Eager, are we?" Sasuke taunted with a smirk on his face. His voice sounded deeper, huskier. It was verbal sex, filled with promises of sin. His smirk disappeared when Naruto's hand shot up to grip his own member tightly. A calloused thumb swiped across the tip, rubbing the fabric of his boxers over the sensitive head.

"I'm not the only one." Naruto purred, enjoying the wariness that Sasuke was now displaying. His own voice was rough, hinting at the raw need of is body. It held an edge of despair.

"Tch." Sasuke grabbed the elastic band of Naruto's boxers and yanked them down. Tufts of blond pubic hair sprang up, surrounding a thickening length with a rosy tip. Sasuke's hand snaked down and wrapped around his shaft, right at the base. Slowly, he began to tighten and loosen his grip, sliding it up and down the blond's length firmly. His thumb traced the vein that throbbed under his touch, following it to underside of his head. Feeling Naruto's grip on his own cock loosen into a weak hold, Sasuke nudged the blond's hand away.

He slid his hand up, rubbing rough palm over Naruto's sensitive tip. Pre-scum seeped out, slicking his hand. Sasuke smirked at the guttural noise Naruto tried to stifle. It came out as a whimper. A pale finger teased his urethra, pushing at the tiny entrance.

Letting go of the blond's pulsing cock, Sasuke pulled his hands out of his uniform and shoved it down past his waist to his knees, leaving him in nothing but his boxers. His own cock strained against the tight black material, agonizingly tenting. Seconds later, they were gone too, joining the fabric accumulating at his knees.

Watching Sasuke shed his clothes, Naruto did the same quickly, wriggling out of the gray cloth and sliding his boxers down. He managed to kick off a shoe, freeing one of his legs from the uniform. His erection sprang up, happy to be out of its confines and eager to be of service. Reaching down, he took his cock in hand and tugged it gently. Sasuke had fucking magical hands. He'd never even felt that good while playing with his own dick. Fuck, what else was the bastard good at? Noticing that Sasuke was watching him intently, Naruto opened his legs wider, laying back in the grass and stroking himself. He even moaned, putting extra emphasis on his groans. Hazy blue eyes watch Sasuke lick his lips and swallow heavily. The raven's adam's apple bobbed with the movement.

Sasuke felt his cock harden even further as Naruto masturbated before him. He could picture those tan fingers wrapped around his own dick, sliding up and down, and jerking him off. Tiny pearl drops appeared on his mushroom head, only to be wiped away and used to slicken his hand. His stomach rolled with the sensation.

Unable to keep away, Sasuke grabbed Naruto's hips and dragged him closer, bringing their cocks in contact. Naruto's pre-cum stained hand grabbed his shoulder in an attempt to brace himself. The moaned in unison. Sasuke began a slow steady rock, leaning forward and bracing himself with his palms on the grass. He felt Naruto's hips move up to force more friction with each grind. His cock brushed up against Naruto's pubic hair and the added stimulation made him shiver and his stomach muscles clench tightly.

"Ngh, fuck." Sasuke groaned, feeling his head swim with pleasure. Letting his head hang down, he closed his eyes and rocked his hips faster, crashing into Naruto's brutally. His fingers dug into the dirt, feeling the grass rip up in his grip.

"S..sa...s'ke." Naruto moaned, arching his back and throwing his head back. He felt the tickling sensation of Sasuke's hair caressing his chest and sliding over his nipples. "Ooo, fuck me." He grunted.

"We're getting to that." Sasuke panted, reaching between them to slide his hand over their throbbing erections. He made sure to coat his hand with the cum that dribbled and leaked out. Slowing his movements, his dirty hand drifted past their cocks to rub at Naruto's perineum. Pressing lightly, he rubbed in a circle, noting the change in pitch of Naruto's moans and position. He gave the area a few more nudges before moving on.

"Hm, bastard." Naruto growled, feeling his muscle weaken with the touch.

Drifting further down, his fingers encountered a small ring of muscle that quivered as his finger gently pushed in. Sasuke stretched out his palm to smear the area with semen, hoping that it would be adequate lubrication. He brought his hand back and gave Naruto's dick a few more strokes before reaching back down and beginning to enter. The tip of his middle finger slowly sank in.

"Shit you're tight." Sasuke rasped, fighting the urge to forgo preparation. He burned to sink his aching cock into the tight, molten heat.

"I'm pretty sure nothing is supposed to go in there." Naruto mumbled hoarsely, wincing as Sasuke's finger penetrated him. It burned a bit, but he could handle it. He'd much rather have Sasuke's hand back on his cock, but he'd wait. They were just getting to the good part.

"Shut it." Sasuke ordered, focusing. Knowing it would be uncomfortable, he leaned forward and laved one of Naruto's brown nipples. He drew the bud into his mouth and sucked on it, lightly biting it. His tongue soothed the bites, licking in circles. The small bud peaked, protruding out a bit. Sasuke licked his way to the next one, tasting Naruto's salty skin.

"Mmm." Naruto groaned, feeling the wet muscle rub against his sensitive flesh. Sasuke's sharp teeth raised goosebumps on his arms and sent streaks of pleasure right to his throbbing dick. "Fucking good." He purred salaciously.

Successfully distracting the blond, Sasuke nudged in another finger and twisted them around. He slowly drew them out and pressed back in, curling and stretching inside Naruto. He ran them along Naruto's walls, searching for his prostate. Coming across a spot that felt different than the flesh around him, Sasuke smirked and jammed his fingers on the spot repeatedly.

"Holy fu-CK!" Naruto shouted, feeling as if someone had given his dick electric shots of pleasure. "Oh god, of fuck!" He rocked into Sasuke's fingers, uncaring of the burn and pain that came along with it.

"Hn. It's about time." Sasuke moaned at the undulating tightness around his digits. Sliding them out, he once again rubbed his hand on Naruto's cock coating it with the fresh cum trickling down. He rubbed the pearly liquid over his dick, hissing as he stroked himself. He hadn't been this hard for anyone in years. He felt like a horny teen again, just aching to shove his cock into the nearest orifice to gain some relief.

Guiding his erection to Naruto's stretched hole, he rubbed his leaking head against the opening teasingly. Fuck, it was like he burned himself. Hot spikes of pleasure ripped across his body, nearly wiping out his higher thinking abilities. Forcing himself to focus, he pressed in, biting into his lip as sizzling wet heat enveloped him tightly, almost sucking him in.

"God, fuck Naruto." He moaned, unable to breathe properly. It was like the oxygen was being sucked out of his lungs, leaving him gasping for more.

"Fuck, fuck! Ow!" Naruto yelped, shocked from the pleasure high he had been on. The burning was back, this time with more pain. Hissing, he gritted his teeth as he tried to force his mind off how much it hurt. Sasuke was bigger than he'd anticipated. Next time, he'd be the one to shove his dick into Sasuke's ass.

"Suck it up." Sasuke snapped, feeling somewhat dizzy. His hips twitched as he forced himself to stop moving. Every cell in his body called out to sink into the inviting heat, but thankfully his brain had one firing neuron left. If they rushed, Naruto could suffer some serious damage.

It had been second, minutes, hours, days, until Naruto finally relaxed and nodded his head for Sasuke to fully enter.

Thankful, Sasuke watched Naruto's face as he moved his hips and sank in until his balls met Naruto's ass. Very slowly, he pulled back out, rotating his hips to gain some more friction.

"Just go for it." Naruto whimpered, throwing his head back. His hands sank into the grass and he dug his fingers in, pulling dirt up as he fisted his hands.

"Hn. I don't take your orders." Sasuke snorted. His words were meaningless though. He slammed back in, beginning a sharp and rough pace. It was almost painful to pull in and out of Naruto's ass, feeling his walls tug at him to stay inside. "Fffffuck." He hissed, feeling sweat pour down his back as he doubled his efforts, straining his body to move faster.

"Ah, s' good." Naruto cried, feeling full in a really strange way. Every time Sasuke pulled away, he tried to force him back in, thrusting his hips up and clenching his inner muscles. It was driving him insane how good it felt to have Sasuke's cock up his ass, pounding right into that spot. With every thrust, he saw stars and was convinced he and Sasuke weren't on a field and exposed to anyone who came to find them or who flew by. It was just the two of them, drowning in ecstasy.

His cocked bobbed up and down rapidly, brushing his abdomen as Sasuke drove into him. Naruto lifted his legs up, wrapping them around Sasuke's waist. His mouth opened in a silent 'O' as he felt Sasuke slide in deeper, reaching areas previously untouched. "Ooh, baby." Naruto hummed. He let go of the clumps of mutilated grass in his hands and reached up to wrap them around Sasuke's neck, sliding up to cart through Sasuke's hair.

He yanked the asshole's head down, shoving his tongue into Sasuke's panting mouth. "That the best you got?" Naruto taunted against Sasuke's mouth, licking up the salty sweat that coated the pale skin. He hoped to God that Sasuke would take that as a challenge and fuck him harder. He was not disappointed in the least.

Swearing loudly, Sasuke pushed Naruto down and away from his mouth. Grabbing the tan leg that was free of fabric, Sasuke threw it over his shoulder, contorting Naruto's body. Adjusting position, Sasuke tilted his hips, getting more room to move and to go deeper. He had more range now. He slowed his pace but made sure each thrust count. He slammed in repeatedly, shoving Naruto deeper into the ground. He could feel the blond sliding up with each thrust.

"Fuck you say?" He growled, sliding his hand over Naruto's stomach before wrapping around his weeping cock. He began a harsh rhythm that mimicked his cock inside Naruto's ass.

"F-fuck. I'm close!" Naruto gasped, unable to take anymore. His body felt hot and cold, tightening uncomfortably and yet so deliciously. Unable to form any more coherent thoughts, he resorted to keening and mewling his need to the raven.

Naruto's ass griped him like a vice, completely cutting off any blood flow to Sasuke's brain. Unable to process anything but the dripping heat around his cock, Sasuke pounded in. He growled like an animal as he began to see spots of white enter his vision. The tight coil in his stomach snapped suddenly, rocketing him into a tidal wave of pleasure. Crying out, Sasuke came the hardest he'd ever had in his life, coating Naruto's insides with jets of hot cum. He nearly choked when Naruto followed him, covering his hand and with ropes of semen.

Still riding the rollercoaster of euphoria, Sasuke slowed his hips into long, languid thrusts. Feeling Naruto quivering around him, Sasuke huffed out a breath of laughter. Completely spent, he pulled out and flopped to his side, panting harshly. His body felt satiated and exhausted.

Naruto bit his tongue as Sasuke came inside him, spreading wet heat inside his ass. The feeling of being full increased tenfold and his own orgasm slammed into him. Feeling Sasuke leave his body, Naruto suddenly felt exposed and empty. He could admit to himself that he would have preferred if Sasuke stayed a little longer, but he'd be damned if he admitted it to the bastard. One great fuck didn't mean things had changed.

"I can believe I just let you fuck me." Naruto gasped, trying to take in adequate oxygen. He felt thoroughly ravished and somewhat empty. His ass was twitching and he could feel Sasuke's cum leaking out and spilling onto the grass beneath him. By God if he didn't want more.

"I can't believe it took you this long to let me fuck you." Sasuke retorted with a smirk. The pleasure haze his mind was in was slowly abating, allowing him to focus on the uncomfortable wet cum covering his dick and the blades of pointy grass poking his body. Ignoring the sensations for now, he glanced up and noticed a bird flying overhead, moving in circles as it descended. He squinted in suspicion.

"I hope you know this doesn't change anything. I still hate you." Naruto warned, sitting up. He nearly shouted when spikes of pain shot up his spine from his ass. "And fuck, my ass hurts asshole!"

"Hn. Of course this changes everything." Sasuke snorted. "Just who do you think is coming down to pay us a visit?" Sasuke lifted his hand and pointed up, towards what he had originally assumed was a bird.

"Huh?" Naruto's head shot up and his eyes bugged open. That was Iruka's plane. "Oh fuck me." He groaned.

"Seconds already?" Sasuke smirked.

A/N: My first attempt at a one-shot. How'd I do? XD Make sure to go check out Mia's shit since it's fucking awesome! Go tell her Happy Birthday!