A WILD UPDATE APPEARS! (this is ending#1).. Ill let you read it, and i have a few notes to make in the end... Im so sorry for not updating in a while, but I'll spare you the draggy details and let you read :)

Christian's POV

I sit outside of Ana's holding room. Today was the day for her chemotherapy treatment. A nurse was inside prepping her and Ted and I sat outside, waiting in one of the lounge areas.

On the days leading up to the treatment, you could see everyone's mood shift and change. Grace was seen pacing the halls on a daily basis, Kate and Elliot were here visiting every hour, and John Flynn seemed more detached than ever before.

I listened to Ana's instructions and kept Ted and Phoebe from the entire disaster. Phoebe wasn't difficult, I just pushed the stroller further, but Ted wanted to see his mummy. It broke my heart to tell him that she was sick… I didn't explain any more to him. I hope I never have to. They both knew something was up, even one-year old Phoebe noted the absence of her mother, but Gail was always there to soothe her. I manage to tame Ted by reading books. It's actually kind of funny how Ana's passion is also Ted's. Ted and I have read through the entire children section of the bookstore the past two weeks, and now Taylor has to go even further to another bookstore when Ted says he wants more books

Ted was lying beside me, reading 'The Giving Tree' when I see the nurse from inside the holding room say something and leave. I look down at Ted, pet his hair and walk over to the door on Ana's room. I know that the chemotherapy had some bad factors going against it. Ana and a nurse pulled me aside and they both told me that the chances were good that Ana might stay for an extended period of time. I didn't mind, as long as my wife got better and returned to me, where we belonged.

I was still standing there when the nurse from before came up behind me.

"Go in there Dearie, Now is the time she needs you most"

She didn't need to say that. I opened the door and was immediately at Ana's side, giving her a huge hug. I didn't show it, but I was terrified. I saw the charts and her chances were not great.

"Hey baby" I say to her, kissing her hair. She smiles up at me, and pecks my nose, just like before she was sick. I smile and she sits back down

"So it's a big day for you eh?" I say to her, trying to keep the hoarseness away from my voice. She smiles.

"So when are you going to Philadelphia?" she asks back. I look at her, surprised

"What?" When was I ever going to Philadelphia?

"You remember, before all this happened, you were under negotiation for one of the banks in Philly, you wanted a takeover, didn't you?"

That was just like my Ana. She was enraptured in my business that sometimes I wonder why she didn't take my internship that I offered.

"I put that on hold, you were sick remember?"

Ana frowns, and I want to wipe that off her face. "Christian, please don't change your normalcy because of my condition. I don't want you to suffer because of me"

I almost gag. She wanted me to be negotiating some takeover while she was at the hospital? Grace would kill me, as well as Kate, and probably Elliot.

"Ana, there's no way I'd leave you here, especially at this time"

Ana almost cries "I feel like such a burden"

I kiss her again. "Ana, you're never a burden. We all love you, and we're a family."

It was almost funny. It was the exact words that she once told me and now I said that to her.

Ana kissed me again, one last lingering kiss. "Take Ted out for me okay? –"

"Ana. There's no way"

"Christian, hear me out. Please. Enjoy a day with Ted, go to the beach. It's just a few miles away. After you go and come back, I'll be alright."

I pause. I've always had a soft spot when it came to kids "There's no way –"

"Christian please, Ted has been missing family time. Heck, the last time I heard he went out to play was weeks ago, when we were in the backyard. Just go out for some time, and the comeback in a few hours. Have some quality time together. Please"

I was going to refute that statement when she interrupted me again

"Please Christian, This is no place for a child. I really don't want you here when I do this, Please, take them elsewhere and I'll call you back as soon as possible."

I pause. I was going to say no, but as I looked into Ana's blue eyes, I relented.

"Fine. We'll be gone for two hours. Please get better, okay Mrs. Grey? And don't think I won't be checking up on you. Taylor already has your heart monitor hooked up to the radio systems in the plane, so we'll take that"

Ana smiles, a real genuine one I haven't seen in weeks. I pulled her over and kiss her, and she returns it with equal fervor. I stand and walk towards the door. I turn back and give her a little salute. Ana giggles.

I walk out to the waiting room and see Ted lying on the sofa.

"C'mon little man, say bye to mum and we'll go to the beach for a bit"

Ted almost jumped in anticipation. We both returned to Ana, and Ted jumped in her arms. Ana smiled again and gave him a huge hug. Ted kissed her and jumped off, chanting "Beach! Beach!"

Ana looks at me again with her sky blue eyes "Thank you"

Ana's POV

I look at Christian and Teddy leave, and settled into my cocoon of pillows. I locked the picture of Teddy, Christian and Baby Phoebe in my head and fiddled with the letters that were underneath my mattress. I heard a beeper, and the nurse was back

"Mrs. Grey, are you ready?"

Christian's POV

-beep-

I've been on the plane for around twenty minutes now, and Teddy is lounging on one of the seats, sipping apple juice.

"Daddy, read me a book! Please!"

I put down the newspaper article and smile at him. I always wondered what was going through my mind when I was scared of a child. They were the best things that happened to me.

-beep-

"Go on, choose a book" I say to Ted, and he flings out of the main area of the plane and goes into the storeroom, where Ana organized a plethora of children's books. Once a bookworm, always a bookworm.

As Teddy runs to find a book, I lean back and hear the comforting beeps that have been broadcasted on my inflight radio. Those little beeps are the lifeline of my wife, and my lifeline.

-beep-

Teddy comes bouncing back and holding a book. Where the sidewalk ends, by Shel Sielverstien

Het sets it towards me and then sits on my lap, shuffling around until he finds his perfect spot. As soon as he's settled, he looks up expectedly.

Where the Sidewalk Ends by Shel Silverstein

There is a place where the sidewalk ends

And before the street begins,

And there the grass grows soft and white,

And there the sun burns crimson bright,

And there the moon-bird rests from his flight

To cool in the peppermint wind.

(-beep-)

Let us leave this place where the smoke blows black

And the dark street winds and bends.

Past the pits where the asphalt flowers grow

We shall walk with a walk that is measured and slow,

And watch where the chalk-white arrows go

To the place where the sidewalk ends.

Yes we'll walk with a walk that is measured and slow,

And we'll go where the chalk-white arrows go,

For the children, they mark, and the children, they know

The place where the sidewalk ends.

-beep-

By the time I was done reading, Teddy was fast asleep. It was not because I was a bad reader, but I suppose that the day in the hospital wore him out. It was alright, we still had a few minutes until we landed, so I let him rest. I set him down in one of the genuine leather seats and I sit down and pick up the book flipping the pages.

Back when I read the poem, from 4 years old, I took the meaning literally. I thought it was actually about where the sidewalk ended and I once believed that if you followed the miles of sidewalk in our suburban summer home, you would find greatness. Thank goodness that train of thought died out before Elliot could make fun of me.

-beep-

The sound makes me smile. Ana was still fighting her best battle.

But the poem's meaning changed over time. In my early brooding teenage years, I thought it was about childhood innocence, and how adults need to go back to the innocent times of childhood. I now believe that it was childhood ignorance, but perhaps that was only me. I thought I was that the workplace was dreary and dead compared to childhood dreams, and people need to embrace their inner child.

But now, I feel that this was an allusion to the staircase to heaven. Its humanity leaving the gruels of the earth and into heaven. It was a salute to how people passed on to better places and to do better things.

-beep-

I smile to myself. Ana would for sure tease me about how her literature skills were rubbing onto me, but I couldn't even counter that. Ana was so engrained in my life. I clutch the book and lay my head onto the head of the seat, allowing myself a bit of rest.

-beep-

Ana was right, as usual. I haven't actually slept in the longest time

Ana's POV

I gasp and sit up. To my surprise, I look down and I see myself on an operating table with busy nurses and doctors scrambling around. I awkwardly shuffle like I'm severely out of place, when an arm laces around my waist.

I was about to hit it off before I look around and see grey eyes of the man I love.

"Christian?" I say, whispering lightly

He gives me one of those rare grins of his and he lifts me up, twirls me around and lands a kiss onto me.

"I'm very disappointed in you Ana"

Now I'm severely confused.

"Why?"

"Because you promised you would never leave me"

I'm still in his arms, bridal – style, when I look behind. It was a contradiction to the calm operating scene I saw moments ago. Now, nurses and doctors were scrambling alike. A tray of surgical tools were lopsided, the previous order was now chaos. I looked and saw the reason why. I had flat lined.

"Christian! I don't understand! Are you dead too?"

He looks at me and drops me, wrapping me into a hug.

"No Ana, I am just the embodiment of what Christian feels for you. But the real me is very much alive."

I sigh in relief. Suddenly, something tickles my leg. I look down and it's Teddy, holding a sleeping phoebe. Ted gives me a big hug, and I hug him back.

"I Love you mum" he says to me, and I feel tears leaking out of my eyes

Christian's POV

I groggily wake up and see Ted jumping on the leather seats. Once long ago, I would have been furious that someone dared to jump of leather imported from Italy and stiched in Vienna, but now I rdly cared. The simple smile on his face made up for it.

"Daddy! We're here!"

we have landed in our cabin near the beach but Ted was more than content just jumping around from seat to seat. I laugh and pull him over

"C'mon little guy, put on the sunscreen and your hat. Then we'll go out"

Ted smiled and ran to the front of the plance where we kept all the supplies. As he reached for the sunscreen, I see him turn the knob and a cheery childrens song play out.

I smile and tap my food to the beat, but my heart constricts. I thought the plane was off, and the radio was off. I panic and I run over to the nearest cooling vents, and my heart drops. The AC was roaring. The only reason that the beeps weren't sounding was –

No.

I refuse to believe it. I look over at Ted happily putting on sunscreen and I could feel my blood turn cold. I run over to where he was, pick him up and ran into the cockpit, where the pilot was, with a grim look on his face, fidding with the radio transmitter.

I streak of relief passes by. Maybe something was wrong with the transmitter. Ted looks at me with wonder but I pay no attention as I grab my phone and dial Taylor, who should be at the hospital. My heart sinks when a female picks up.

"Hello?" said female said with a sniff

No. "Grace? Is that you? Why are you answering Taylor's phone?"

On the other end, she sniffs "Taylor is indisposed at the moment"

"Don't beat around the bush Mother, where is she?"

At that moment, I could hear her burst into tears, and I feel that color drop off my face. The pilot saw and immediately jumped back into his seat and set the gps for the hospital in Seattle.

"Daddy, where are we going?" Teddy asks me, looking shocked at the fact that the beach was quickly disappearing below us.

I put the phone down, with Grace still sobbing on the other end and wrap my arms around him, knowing that in Seattle, phoebe was getting the same treatment by my mother, my sister or by Gail. He instinctively wraps my arms around me and dosent say a word. I pretend that he dosent see me cry.

-OOO-

On the way to the ward, I see a nurse running by me and a couple waiting with a crying baby. Those things were all a blur as I ran myself to the waiting room, where my family and the remainder of Ana's family sat. they immediately saw me but I wasn't up for condolences rigt now. My eyes latch on to Grace and I silently urge Ted to go to his Grandma. He goes and without a ward, I exit to the hallways heading towards one of the rooms, a room forever etched into my memory as it is where I saw my wife last.

I turn the corner to the room where I nearly run into Flynn. He looks at me teary eyed and hands me a box. It was a mega pack tea box, one that had multiple flavors and could hold 240 individually wraped tea bags. I look at him bug eyed. What was he doing?

I take the tea box and open it, inside were eleven envelopes. In Ana's neat handwriting, I could see names on the sides, Theodore, Phoebe, Theodore, Phoebe, Theodore, Phoebe… I could see only one envelope with my name, but it was the biggest envelope with its contents about to burst.

I take the envelope out and Flynn leaves. I open it and place the rest gently beside me. I break open the seal and slowly I slid down the wall of the hospital, looking at the curly lettering that my wife's hand created.

Dear Christian,

First of all, I'd like to thank you. Thank you so much for being there for me, for buying me those books, for taking me out for dinner, for showing me the skyline in a freaking helicopter, for being my fiancé, then my husband, for giving me Ted, for being my critic, for giving me Phoebe, and being my best friend. I really could go on forever, but I'd run out of room, or out of time, whichever comes first.

I remember a long time ago, when Kate and I were in University and I first saw you, kate warned me not to go blindly into a relationship, but I went further and vowed I would never fall in love with you. I was scared. You were perfect and aloof, and I seemed to pale in comparision. I was scared that your presence would leave me in the shadows and block my light, but instead, you took your light, your megawatt studio lights, and shared them with me.

I fell in love with you not during the flashy glider ride (though that was great) nor during your fancy dates eating some of the most exotic things I have ever seen, but remember when we went for coffee and you noticed that I pulled my tea bag out? Remember when you made tea for me like that and even asked the staff to do the same? I fell in love with you right then and there.

And I would have never imagined that it brought us here. We fought it all, your fifty shades and my insecurity, and somehow, we made two mismatched paintbrushes a masterpiece. I don't regret a single thing, and that was something I thought I'd always have. But you took all my regrets away and we made it work and I can go on saying that I lived the perfect life.

I want to say I love you husband, and I'm sorry for leaving you like this. I know you're hurting but please don't. It wasn't planned, and there was nothing that could hae been done. I accept it, and I can only wish that one day you'll accept it to. I leave you our two angels, and know you'll do whats right for them. You are a great father and they'll no doubt relish in the fact that they have one of the best daddies in the world.

Christian, I more than anything else in the world, I want you to be happy. I want you and the children to accept and move on, because there is nothing that can change and what I wish for more than ever is your happiness. Christian, please don't be mad. I enclosed my ring in the envelope, and I want you to know that if you find someone else to share your life with, don't be afraid because I'll love her just like you love me, and she'll be part of the family. Christian promise me that you'll never throw away a chance at happiness because in the end, that's all I want for you, and I know that's all you wanted for me as well.

Love Always

Ana Grey

PS. Sorry, I had too much to say, even if I majored in English, emotions can messu your writing

PPS. There is no way you're keeping Phoebe secluded and away from boys until she's thirty… or forty two ;)

I fumble at the paper and I don't notice the tears running down my face I look in the envelope and sure enough, her ring was there, glinting at me. I gently fold the letter away and placed it back into the envelope. I took out the ring and stared at it one more time. I walked over to the windows of the hospital and used the light to see it clearer. It was a platnuim band lined with diamonds, simple but elegant. In the inside of the ring, there was the initials, AG and CG. I remember that day because I was giddy with joy that the woman was accepting this token that she was going to be mine, with my enitials and everything. I look at it and think over the proposal that Ana gave to me.

A clicking noise registers and I look over. A female nurse was stalking by dressed in scrubs holding a tray. What really drew my attention was her eyes. They were fiery green, like emeralds. I called her over and she gives me a sweet smile.

"Excuse me, what room is Anastasia Grey being held in?"

I presume she recognized the name because her smile melted into a look of sadness. I was going to turn away when she briskly replied

"Room 402" I turn to go when I hear her again

"I'm so sorry for your loss"

I nod but keep walking. I wondered how many times she has said that to someone. I quickly shake that thought out of my head and searched for that room.

I finally find it and I see two doctors conversing in front of it. I walk over and their conversation falters.

"Mr. Grey I presume?"

I nod silently. He seems to understand my gist as he takes out his keys and unlocked the door of the room.

I enter and I feel a cold draft. But that doesn't stop me, as I see a cot in the very end of the room. My Ana was lying there. I walk over and look down, slightly surprised. She has her eyes closed with a ghost of a smile on her lips. It's the same smile that she uses to greet me when I come back from work, or when Ted and Phoebe come back from the park. I smile down at the sleeping woman that is my wife and I reach out and grab her hand.

It's cold, but not stone cold. I uncurl her ring finger and carefully place her wedding ring onto her finger once more, then placing it down on her chest. There, she looks complete I think to myself. I lay a kiss on her forehead once more and slowly walk back. She looks as if she's sleeping. I turn and walk out, not caring in tears are coming out of my eyes.

I walk back to the waiting room, where my eyes latch on to Ted's. He must have been informed as he looks solemn. I smile at him and he gives me a half smile back. I bend down and pick him up and in the corner of my eye, I see Phoebe's stroller, where she's comfortably resting. With Ted in one arm, I grab the stroller and walked toward the hospital entrance. I hear Grace coming up behind me, but someone might've stopped her because the footsteps recede.

I take the elevator down and walk out of the main entrance, I get onto my limo that was waiting for me (thank Taylor) and I help buckle Ted and get Phoebe into the seat while closing the stroller. I find a spot and meet the surprised eyes of my driver.

"Home" I say, and the engine kicks into action. I look at my Ted and Phoebe and smile at them as the streets roll by. I pat my coat pocket and the reassuring feel of the cardboard of the tea box is still there. I smile. It seems as if she didn't leave me after all.

OK BEFORE YOU KILL ME

I will update an alternate ending for those who didn't want her to die, so don't fret, I have it up and going and hopefully, I can get it up by Saturday. Its shorter because I didn't have to grueling sit and write a death letter which is really hard and was part of the reason of my writers block.

I'm sorry for the long update time, but

I hope it was worth it. This took me a while to write between exams, school stuff and yah….

PLEASE follow this story to get a happier ending, and review what you thought of it 3