First multi-chap fic after so loooong! And first OUAT-themed multi-chap too :) It just popped out of my head while I was on my way to somewhere I forgot and it just haunted me while I made my one-shots. Then suddenly Strangers by Seven Lions, Myon & Shane 54 feat. Tove Lo comes on and I was like "This is so...RIGHT" and yeah I just had to write it down.

I hope you guys like it! Not much happening in this first chapter though :/

Killian closed his eyes as he felt a tug in his... He would have said 'in his chest' if it wasn't for his heartless state. He knew what it meant. Gold was summoning him.

He let his body do he work. Rumpelstiltskin may have his heart but he didn't have his mind. And he certainly didn't care about a single thing that could happen next. Not now. Not when he just lied straight to her face. Telling her that he had saved the day. Telling her that Gold had turned a new leaf. Telling her in words that felt like his but he knew wasn't his. Nobody knew that. Nobody except her. He hoped.

When she look at him with those sea green eyes full of concern, he felt bad. His mind told him that his chest ached, that tears stung his eyes, that he wanted to just hold her. But he couldn't feel it. He couldn't just do it. He couldn't do anything but just move his mouth to words that weren't his. Then she kissed him. He felt horrible. His mind told him he should feel the flutter in his chest, the loud erratic beating of his heart, the intensity of his love. Yet he couldn't. It made him want to just get away from everything. He wanted to shut himself out. He wanted everyone to forget him. He wanted her to forget him, to hate him. He wanted to just die.

He felt that tug again. Stronger this time. The Crocodile was persistent as ever. Well, it wasn't like he had a choice but to follow. He walked as fast as he could to get away from the diner, to get away from the people, to get away from her.

He knew he should be sad. His mind told him so. He couldn't feel it. Not one bit. Yet he knew he was. Sad. Angry. Guilty. Afraid. Not of the Dark One. He was certainly not afraid of the imp. He swallowed the lump that was forming in his throat as he watched them disappear into the diner. He was afraid of what would happen. He was afraid of what was to come.

The bell echoed in the seemingly empty shop. He rolled his eyes. Of course, Belle wasn't going to be there. The woman didn't have a single clue with what her husband had been doing and plotting. He felt really bad for her. Her husband was back to his old and evil ways. No. He never changed from the very beginning. He was always the same old Crocodile he loathed.

"How did it go, Captain?" Gold's voice came from behind the shop.

Killian pursed his lips and made his way across the shop, entering Gold's office. God, he wanted to punch that smug look off of his face.

"Let's just get this over with, Crocodile." He glared at the man in front of him.

Rumpelstiltskin smiled.Smiled. It made him sick. It made him want to puke. The man was a demon.

"So impatient considering that it's going to be your last."

His body grew tensed. He was never afraid of dying. Even now. But he wasn't ready. Not when he just found his home. Not when he just felt loved and accepted. Not when he just found the woman of his life.

He needed more. He needed more time. More time to make amends with everyone. More time to get to know the town. More time to charm the Queen Snow White. More time to tease Charming. More time to go sailing with Henry. More time to love Emma Swan. More. He wanted more. More.

His eyes flitted back to the monster in front of him and he realized what he was showing him. He just had to push it all down. He couldn't let the demon see. He couldn't let the demon win. He frowned.

"What do you mean?"

A laugh. A laugh that sent chills running down his spine. A laugh that made his stomach dip.

"Oh, don't play dumb with me, Captain. We both know you know what I mean."

Before he could open his mouth to answer back, a puff of smoke surrounded them. He blinked a few times, waiting for his eyes to adjust to the light. He felt a gush of wind and heard the rustling of leaves. Wind. Leaves. They were outside. Just then he became aware of his surroundings.

They were standing in the middle of the road. Tress trailed along the sides of the road, both ends leading to nowhere. He would have said they were nowhere if he didn't know better but he did. And he perfectly knew where they was. His eyes couldn't leave the faint red line that was drawn on the ground. Somehow he knew what was going to happen. What if? What if.

"Don't worry, Captain. We'll be over soon enough and I'm pretty sure you know how this will end."

Killian looked at the man beside him. He roared in laughter. "What happened, Crocodile? Couldn't handle a knife?"

He expected it to hit a nerve. He wanted to taunt him, to lull him into fighting. Yet all he got was a smile. A smile that told him that that wasn't the case.

"Life isn't that easy." Killian felt his stomach dip. He felt a lump forming in his throat. He watched as Gold walked towards the town line. "I wanted to kill you. Take your heart, use it and crush it in my hands. But then I realized that it was too easy."

Rumpelstiltskin turned to look at him with a triumphant look on his face. Killian knew what was coming. He knew it.

"I realized I had to make you feel it. The pain, the agony of losing someone because someone took them from you." He looked at him straight in the eye. "Do you know what will happen, Captain, if you cross that line?"

He couldn't stop himself from swallowing the lump forming in his throat. Rumpelstiltskin continued in a cheerful voice as he approached him until he was standing directly in front of him.

"Once you cross that line, you'll never be able to get back in town. Oh, let's not forget the fun part, dearie. You'll remember every thing. Every. Single. Thing. You'll remember that you will never see Storybrooke again and you'll never see Emma Swan in your life."

"Cheers!"

The four friends emptied their glasses at the same time. The sound of cheering filled the air as they raced to finish their drink. The sound of the first mug was heard seconds after followed by the other three.

"Well, what can I say, mates?" Killian laughed at the three red-faced men.

"You monster!" Tristan roared slapping Killian's back.

Killian slapped him back. "Please, you couldn't handle it."

The words stumbled out of his mouth before he could stop it. Then he suddenly didn't want to drink anymore. Suddenly, he didn't want to stay and laugh at their shallow jokes. Suddenly, he didn't want to do anything anymore. Just to stand up and leave his drunk friends and walk home. Alone.

He shook his head looking at the three giggling men in front of him once more. He should stay because he also left the last time. He promised. And he never goes back on his promise. It's just a few drinks. He could handle it.

He laughed half-heatedly over his friends' jokes. He took little sips of his drink. He smiled forcefully to bar wenches who devoured him with their eyes. That was until one of them walked towards their table. Tall. Slim. Plump lips. Pointy nose. Pale blue eyes, almost green. Blonde hair. But she was not her. Her lips weren't as plump as her soft lips. Her nose wasn't as perfect as her adorable nose. Her eyes weren't as bright as her piercing green eyes. Her hair wasn't as amazing as her radiant blonde hair.

She was just not her.

He stood up without a word and walked out of the bar, ignoring the slurred protests of the other three men. It wasn't like they wouldn't have fun if he leaved. He was certain they would start laughing again a few seconds after he left. He tried to focus on getting home as quickly as possible, trying to ignore the images flashing through his mind. Images of Emma Swan and her beautiful face, mind and soul. Each step he took another image popped up in his head. His chest tightened. His eyes stung. His pace quickened.

When he finally reached his apartment, all he wanted was to sleep. To forget about everything. To forget that he couldn't see her again. To forget the pain. And he knew he couldn't do that when this was one of those nights, when everything haunted him. His past. His present. His future. Everything.

Living for months, he had grown accustomed to the lifestyle in this realm. He was aware that the only answer to his problem was pills. Sleeping pills. Reserved for nights such as this. He took one and laid down on his bed, hoping he could rest his mind and soul, hoping he could forget what he did, hoping he could...

Emma Swan.

A loud voice shouted inside of him. Then darkness clouded over his senses, taking over the images of the blonde woman and pulling him into a deep slumber.

So what do you think guys? Thanks for reading! Hope you guys stay with me with this one! And I almost forgot...

THE WORDS! IT WAS AMAZING! UGH!