It takes three to five really long minutes for it to sink into Bo's brain that this is actually honest to god fucking happening.

It's like she's been expecting this, but not really. I mean yeah, they went to the hospital and put a baby inside of Lauren and the doctor said it'll be just a short wait and everything, but those were just words. And eggs.

Words mean nothing, eggs break. It was all just a fifty fifty kinda thing before. Fifty percent chance it could happen and fifty percent chance it couldn't. Like maybe they chose a guy with one of those really lazy non performing sperms or something. You never can tell at first sight with the little buggers which ones are lazy as fuck and which ones can get the job done. So it was all a wait and see situation.

But now- Holy fuck- now, it's happening. It's really fucking happening. There's an actual human being growing inside Lauren's womb, or fallopian tube, or wherever it is they grow at this stage of life, right now. And not just any human- their human. And not just their human, their human, who fucking hates gummy bears.

Her life is literally over. Done.

"Oh my god," she whispers, shoving more gummy bears into her mouth because if this is the last time she ever eats them then she's eating as many as she can.

"Bo." Lauren calls her name like she isn't sure if she's just doing it, or if she's asking Bo some sort of question. They've been waiting for this to happen for weeks and now its happening and neither of them know what the fuck they're supposed to do. "Honey, are you okay?"

"Yes." She answers. Calmly chewing on her gummy bear. "I'm great." She adds a nod at the end for no reason.

"You're freaking out." It's not a question.

"You're pregnant." She says like that's supposed to answer questions Lauren is yet to ask. The thing is, it should answer questions Lauren is yet to ask. Well, according to Bo anyway. Lauren is maybe, possibly, probably pregnant. Meaning she has a tiny little thing that at some point will develop into a human inside her. Into their human. Meaning half of it will be Bo's. Meaning half of it will maybe, possibly, probably be seventeen different levels of fucked up before its first birthday.

Poor thing.

"Bo-" soft hands cradle her cheeks and it's only then that she realizes at some point during her internal freak out, she actually started having a panic attack. "Bo, look at me." Lauren says sternly yet softly and Bo forces herself to look into brown eyes. "I love you."

It's all she says. Simple and straight to the point. Like it's all the truth that exists in the world right now. Like it's the only truth that matters and Bo starts to feel her heart calm. It gets that feeling it always does when Lauren says those words and looks at her like that. Like it's beating too fast and too slow and too perfectly all at once. And her lip twitch develops into a full blown smile and she tries to duck her head to hide her blush because Lauren looking at her like that- like she's the most perfect, most amazing human being that the gods ever created, always does her in. It turns her into a blushing idiot and that's really as un-badass as it gets.

(Blushing is for wimps. Except when Lauren does it because it makes her look hella pretty.)

But Lauren doesn't allow her to hide her blush. Instead, she moves even more into Bo's personal space so now Bo can smell her shampoo and that lavender scent she has on her and she can see the little drops of water fall off her hair to her shoulder.

"I love you so much." She says again in her just-for-Bo voice. The one she never uses on anyone else. The one that makes Bo feel worth the entire world and then some. "And I can't believe how lucky I am to be bringing a child into this world with you." Her fingers move to tuck a few strands of hair behind Bo's ear and she leans down and presses a soft kiss to Bo's cheek.

"Yeah?" Bo feels herself smile a goofy ear to ear smile.

Lauren chuckles and then smiles like Bo is the most adorable thing ever. "Yeah."

…

So, apparently, as it turns out, baby freak outs come in stages.

You freak out, you calm down and go all-oh I'm having a baby. And you're happy and all mommy like and just when you think you have finally accepted it, you freak out again.

"Bo-" Lauren sighs and rubs her forehead, looking at Bo as she runs all around the place, looking for her car keys that she could have sworn she had seconds ago. "Is this really necessary?"

"Yes." Bo answers with no hesitations. "Fuck where did I put those damn keys?"

"You're holding them." Lauren answers like she's not sure whether or not Bo is actually asking that question.

The brunette looks down at her hand which as it turns out, really is holding the key. Right.

"Uh- okay. So rememeber to drink the whole bottle of mountain dew okay, you're going to need to pee a lot."

"Bo-"

"I'll be right back." She leans down, kisses Lauren's forehead and rushes off.

….

The girl at the store looks at her like she's her own special brand of crazy as she picks every single brand of pregnancy test she can find. But that girl can also go fuck herself. There're like literally a million different brands here and each of them says they're the best.

One of them, no lie, promises to tell you everything down to the day of conception. And Bo might not be front runner to mother of the year seeing as she had zero examples growing up, but she sure as hell is going to try her best to give her kid the very best money can buy. And that includes a goddamn pregnancy test. And since there's no way for her to tell which one of them is the best –they're all in fucking boxes for crying out loud- she's just going to buy them all.

"Would you like to buy all of them?" The sales girl with the big glasses and judgmental voice asks, looking at Bo's gazillion boxes.

It's at the tip of her tongue. A sarcastic retort that's both funny and witty is right at her effin tongue. Because honestly, why the fuck would she carry all this damn boxes here if she didn't want to buy them. Just why?

But then she remembers Lauren, her wife, who's always insisting that she should be a bit nicer to people. Lauren who's carrying their baby. Their baby who might one day work at a store like this and who might one day ask such a question and Bo would want whoever the person being asked is to answer nicely because if not- if they answered rudely and made her child cry, which in turn would most likely upset Lauren, she would find them and make their existence miserable.

So she smiles. "Yes. I'd like to buy all of them."

"All fifteen of them."

The girl insists and it takes every single thing in Bo to keep smiling. It's for her baby, she reminds herself, it's all for her baby. "Yes. All fifteen of them."

The girl just keeps looking at Bo like she's insanity personified but she does do her work and it a few minutes Bo is paying and carrying her huge ass bag home to Lauren.

It's not even born yet and this baby is already making her be nice to strangers; it's definitely Lauren's kid.

…..

Lauren is a little reluctant at first. Apparently she also thinks fifteen is a bit much. "But you drank all that mountain dew. Don't you think you'll need to you know pee? Like a lot. " Bo reminds her helpfully. On the way home, when she stopped to get Lauren some ice cream for no other reason other than the fact that they don't have any left in the house and Lauren loves that shit, she also bought a How to Deal with Your Pregnant Wife without Messing Up for dummies. That is actually the title of the book. And chapter one says, 'present everything like it's her idea,' so that's what Bo's doing.

Between this and the romance book and her natural way with females, Bo is literally going to be the best wife ever.

"I didn't drink all of it." Lauren opens the tab and pokes two spoons into it. Clearly inviting Bo to join her. "And besides, I only need one test to know if I'm pregnant or not. I have no idea why you bought so many." She says, looking at the numerous boxes they have spread on the table.

"I wanted to be sure." Bo shrugs, scooping some ice cream and feigning calmness when it's the opposite of what she feels inside. She literally started feeling a panic attack coming up once Lauren mentioned pregnant again.

Apparently she's not great at all this calmness business because Lauren sees right through her. "What?" Bo asks, as the blonde looks at her intently.

Its long minutes before Lauren finally throws the box she'd been holding on the table and just looks at Bo. "You know what, we should do something today."

Well, if that's not fucking random then Bo has no idea what is.

"What?"

"Yeah." Lauren nods like her own idea is sinking in. "Jerry's not around and you've wanted to bake a cake for days now. We should do that."

"But-" Bo looks at the table full of pregnancy tests then back at Lauren, "what about-"

"The tests are going nowhere and if there's a baby inside me now, there'll still be a baby inside me when we're done baking. Come on," she gets up and stretches her hand to Bo. "Let's go shower and get ready."

….

It's evident within the first fifteen minutes of their cake baking just exactly what Lauren was offering Bo; a distraction.

It's clear that she's really over fucking whelmed with everything. The panic attack. The numerous tests. The book. She's walking waters she thought she was ready for but turned out to be too deep and for a moment, she thought she was drowning. And as usual, Lauren was there to offer her a way out.

They don't, not even once, mention babies while they bake.

Lauren is bossy as usual and she keeps telling Bo what to do and what not to do and just because she looks so good when she's being all dictator like and shit, Bo does the opposite of what she's told just so bossy Lauren can come out in full swing.

Also, getting to kiss her pout away is a plus.

"Okay." She ties her red bandana even tighter around her head and Bo refrains from telling her she might cut off her circulation or something. "Pass me the eggs."

Bo does as she's told but then pulls back when Lauren goes to take it from her and the blonde gives her a confused look. Or it's meant to be one but there's a smile playing at the corner of her lips all the way to her eyes that makes it anything but. "Bo-"

"You only get the eggs if you kiss me first. In fact, you get nothing here, unless you kiss me first."

"What if I say no?" She retorts, crossing her arms.

"You won't." Bo grabs her apron and pulls her closer, loving how she laughs when their bodies finally connect, "you love my kisses."

"Maybe a little." Lauren gives a playful little shrug and Bo smirks. Trailing kisses from her neck to her cheek stopping right at her ear.

"A little?"

"Okay, maybe more than a little." She finally relents and Bo laughs. And it's easy and it's unguarded and she just loves how Lauren knew she needed this even before she did.

"I love you." She sighs out, burying her face in Lauren's neck and not really liking how fucking emotional she's getting. "I love you more than a little, more than a lot even. I just really really love you.

"I really, really love you too." Lauren says back in a quiet sincere voice and when Bo's tears hit her neck, neither of them mention it.

…..

It's almost two hours later when they finally finish eating their cake and the dishes are done when Bo nods, "I'm ready."

Lauren doesn't even ask for what, she just looks Bo in the eyes like she's searching for something before finally smiling softly and walking to the bathroom, Bo behind her.

"Do you want me to come with?"

"I know how to pee on a stick, Bo." Lauren snorts out and Bo rolls her eyes, leaning on the bathroom door.

"I know that you dork, I just meant for you know-"actually, even she doesn't know what she meant. Moral support? Do people ever need moral support to pee?

"All I have to do is pee on a stick, babe. I got this."

"You're sure?" She asks, she's going to be a supportive wife goddammit.

Lauren just chuckles and pecks her. "You're cute." She teases and before Bo can tell her she's not cute, she's already disappeared behind the door.

….

"Are you done?"

"Not yet."

"Are-"

"Bo!"

"I was going to ask if you need more fluids." The brunette defends herself because honestly that's what she was going to ask.

"No. Thank you."

Five seconds go without them talking then, "are-"

"No babe. I'm not done and I'm never going to be done if you keep asking me if I'm done after every five seconds."

It's silent again for a whole minute which is actually a record before- "baby." Bo calls sweetly.

"Yes." Lauren sighs out.
"Are you having performance anxiety?"

"Bo!" Lauren gasps out and Bo can hear traces of laughter in her voice and she chuckles out.

"Sorry."

"No you're not."

"No I'm not." She shrugs and slides to the floor. Wondering from a scale of one and silly how hard Lauren would slap her if she just barged in there. Usually Lauren isn't a violent person, like at all. But there's a huge probability that she's pregnant and those beings are like feelings Ninjas. You literally never know with pregnant people.

It's just been so long and she feels like whatever bugs are residing in her stomach just had babies of their own and are now wrecking havoc inside her.

"Okay, you can come in now." The words aren't even fully out of Lauren's mouth before Bo has the door open. Lauren is standing in front of the sink, the test just lying idly like the information it's holding won't change everything.

"Are-"she moves to stand beside Lauren and the blonde nods, smiling.

"Yeah. We're having a baby."

Her stomach twists and her throat feels dry and it's like her hands can't stop shaking no matter how hard she tries to make them. She looks at Lauren with apologetic eyes. She thought she was ready. After they baked and everything, she thought she was ready. She was even psyching herself up while waiting on the other side of the door and she honestly, really thought she was ready.

Apparently she thought wrong.

"I'm sorry." She says looking at her shaking hands because she is sorry. She knows it might seem to Lauren like she doesn't want this, but that's not it. It's just- she doesn't even know what the fuck it is. "I'm so sorry." Her voice comes out broken and Lauren moves from the sink to stand in front of her. Taking her into her arms and hugging her in those hugs that make Bo wonder how she ever fit into anything else on earth.

"I'm so sorry, baby. I'm sorry for being like this."

"Don't be." Lauren pulls away and wipes away her tears, "you're allowed to feel any way you feel like feeling. You care so much." Lauren says, taking Bo's hands and lacing their fingers. "You care so much even without knowing it and that's how I know you're going to make an amazing mother. Our baby is so lucky to have you."

Bo doesn't know how she does it. She doesn't know how Lauren keeps being so patient with her because lord knows even she herself has lost her patience with all this crying business hours ago. And she doesn't know how Lauren knows the right things to calm Bo down even if it's just for a second.

But she does know that she's lucky she's bringing a child into the world with her. And she might not believe in herself as much as Lauren believes in her just yet, but she does believe in Lauren.

And she knows she's the lucky one.

…..

I really am Sorry this took so long, life happened & I lost all my work so I had to rewrite. But now I have some part, so the wait won't be as long. Hopefully.

Thank you for reading.