my friend helpd me fix my mistake. I hope this time it's readable!
Sorry, but for now this is oneshot. I have my final test in theater in two weeks and then school trip, and I will bee at rehearsals all this time so I wont bee able to write. But how know? maybe after 'Israeli Journey' I will have time. We shell see in month from now!
Dear sister,
it's been a while since I heard from you. Can't you find a minute to think of me since angel boy became your boyfriend?
Every hour you don't spend thinking on me, I think of you both. Sometimes I think about my hatred to him, I think about the anger. I mean after all, it's mostly his fault I'm here. Ever since he came to our neighborhood everything went wrong. That obsession he developed with you, the quick stares he snicks on you while you don't notice, and the nights he spends on stalking our family from his home. Can't you see how sick that is? I know you didn't mean to seduce him. All you wanted is a friend, but I could feel that he didn't want to be "just your friend". Boys can sense when one of the others tries to steal the girl in their lives- that's why I wanted you stay far away from him! I wanted to protect on you little sis, and explain to him that you are off limits!
Of course, you've disappointed me too. The fault is yours as well. You know it's best for you to reject the bastard, not just because what I thought or what dad wanted for you, but also to save your heart from breaking when he will leave you. But after a while you just couldn't hold yourself anymore. Oh, my poor little angel girl. One day you shall come back from work and catch him cheating on you, maybe with your best friend. He won't be loyal to you! He can't understand the meaning of love! You deserve someone better than him, someone who knows how special you are, that you are the most beautiful thing on Earth. And most importantly, someone who will not hesitate to punish you the way you deserve when you cross the line.
You have decided to follow him, blinded by his pretty mask. Tell me something, dear sister: when he touches at you, do you think of how my hands used to make your skin shiver? Does his kiss makes want to you cry from joy like mine used to? I know he could never replace me, no matter how good he is in bed. You know, the picture of you in my head keeps me sane here. I keep seeing you in my bed, your red curls on my pillow, your bright eyes opening up when I come into you. I miss mostly to your whining, the sweet sounds you insisted were from pain and I know that they weren't.
Although you never came to visit me here, you're still a trouble maker on my behalf. The others keep away like there's something's wrong with me when they hear what I'm here for. Your lies are tiring me, really. I can't understand how the judge could believe them. The fake cries, the way you insisted to not look at me. Stupid angel boy, sitting there waiting for you next to your lawyer while dad sits next to me. How could any of these idiots not see that the bruises on your body were made by a loving hand, not a monstrous one?
It doesn't matter I guess. In two weeks from now I'll be free. Free to go wherever I want. Free to find you, free to take you again. Free to love you as much as I want. Free to hurt you. No angels in this world shall stop me from haunting you, my dear. There is just one thing I want more than anything Clary: I just want to see your eyes again, feeling for me one last time.
Before they'll be filled with darkness.