CHAPTER TWENTY: WHEN I SEE YOU AGAIN

It's been a long day without you my friend,
and I'll tell you all about it when I see you again.
We've come a long way from where we began.
Oh I'll tell you all about it when I see you again.

Why do you have to leave so soon?
Why do you have to go?
Why do you have to leave me when I needed you the most?
Cause I don't really know how to tell ya without feeling much worse.
I know you're in a better place and it's always gonna hurt.
Carry on, give me all the strength I need.
To carry on.

It's been a long day without you my friend,
and I'll tell you all about it when I see you again.
We've come a long way from where we began.
Oh I'll tell you all about it when I see you again.

How do I breath without ya?
Feeling so cold.
I'll be waiting right here for ya till the day you're home.
Carry on, give me all the strength I need.
To carry on.
So let the light guide your way, hold every memory as you go.
And every road you take will always lead you home.

Felicity had always thought keeping track of the number of days since or until a certain occasion was mindless, but that didn't exactly stop her for mentally crossing off the nine hundredth and seventy fifth day since she had seen Oliver when she woke up that morning. It was a day like any other, the October air crisp and slightly chilly and yet, so much would change.

In the past three years, a lot had changed. Felicity still worked at Queen Consolidated, but she had recently been promoted to head of IT and had moved out of her father's house, cutting all financial (and most emotional) ties with him. She had found a lovely townhouse with a spare bedroom that she'd converted into a computer/tech palace. She had tried dating, even had a boyfriend or two, but it never lasted. She was unable to really commit to anyone for reasons she was all too aware of. Oliver.

At one point, she had gone a bit out of control in an attempt to just feel something. Whether it was booze, drugs or sex, it didn't seem to matter. It never worked, but she'd actively tried. Tommy and Laurel had sat her down and talked some sense into her and she'd realized what a mess she'd turned into and had vowed to turn things around.

After her morning coffee she sent a quick text to Thea telling her to get ready because she would be at the mansion soon. Thea had grown into a lean, strong and sophisticated young woman over the past three years but she hadn't quite grown out of her teenage antics. She still liked to party hard and often while her anger issues had actually become such a problem that Felicity had suggested she put some of that pent up anger into any kind of workout. Thea had agreed, but on one condition; that Felicity would train with her. Felicity was quick to agree, because Thea was the one Queen she could actually help with something. And it meant she had less time alone to worry herself sick over Oliver.

Over time, not only Thea's anger problem had lessened but her grades had gone up as well, ensuring that she would be able to go to a good school after graduation. Felicity was more than a little proud of her. Thea was as close to a sister she had and to see her thrive gave her the best feeling in the world.

Oliver would have been so proud of his little sister. Felicity often found herself taking on 'big brother' tasks, as far as scaring off teenage boys unworthy of dating Thea. She took her job very seriously, for Oliver.

God, she missed him so much. His voice was a constant presence in the back of her head that she didn't want to get rid of. She clung to his memory like a life boat. If she lost hope that he wouldn't return to her, she would lose her mind and tip right back into that pit of despair she fell into right after the accident.

About forty minutes later, halfway down the Queen driveway, Felicity had still not received a reply from Thea and was expecting, and preparing for the worst. She parked her red mini cooper, grabbed her duffel bag and walked over to the grand front door. It slid open before she could grasp the handle, a smiling Raisa on the other side.

"Good morning, Miss Merlyn." She spoke with her thick Russian accent.

Felicity smiled sweetly at the older woman and sighed. "Raisa, please. Call me Felicity."

Raisa nodded and smiled but Felicity knew she wasn't gonna change the way she addressed her. She let Raisa take her coat and glanced around the foyer.

"Any sign of Thea being up yet?"

Raisa shook her head. "Not yet, but you can go right upstairs. I have breakfast ready in the dining room."

"Thank you, Raisa." Felicity smiled, a hand falling to Raisa's forearm before she stepped away and ascended the stairs. Felicity knocked twice before entering Thea's room. The girl in question was sprawled out in her enormous king sized bed, arm hanging off the edge, drooling all over her pillow. Sighing, Felicity let her shoulders slump and quietly closed the door behind her. Dropping her duffle bag on the sofa, she sat down on the edge of the bed and tugged Thea's hair out of the girl's face.

"Thea. Wake up. The new day isn't gonna wait for you." She whispered, trying to gently ease Thea into consciousness. All the response she got was a groan and a weak attempt at swatting her hands away.

"Come on, Thea. We don't have all day." Felicity spoke up, lightly shaking Thea's shoulder.

Another groan and Thea was peeking through her lashes, squinting her eyes against the bright daylight.

"Do I have to get up?" She mumbled.

"Yes, you do. You told me to get you out of bed no matter how much you would protest, remember?"

Thea groaned again and turned to lie on her back. "Please remind me why I told you that because I honestly can't think of a single reason right now."

Chuckling, Felicity stood up and walked into the giant walk-in closet attached to Thea's room.

"Because, and I'm quoting here: "I don't wanna waste the entire day by spending half of it in bed." Besides, It'll be good. We haven't trained in a while and I wouldn't want your progress to be for nothing." She called out, grabbing some comfortable clothes for Thea.

Walking back into the main room, Thea had managed to sit up against the headboard. She rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest. "I hate it when you're right."

Felicity smiled sweetly and dropped the clothes on the bed. "C'mon now, get dressed. Raisa made us breakfast."

After Thea got dressed and Felicity changed into her workout-gear, they ate their breakfast and made their way to the gym the basement of the mansion housed. Starting off with a proper warm-up, Felicity attempted to get Thea's hangover under control, but it was clear that today would only consist of medium butt-kicking in the gym. After all, miracles only happened in the movies, Felicity told herself. She would have to work with what hungover Thea could give her. She was lucky they didn't have much time today, anyway.

Thea's hands got wrapped up in electric blue boxing gloves, Felicity stationed behind the punching bag, keeping it still while Thea let out her anger.

"C'mon Thea, you can do better. Rotate your hips. That's where the strength comes from."

Grunting, Thea did as Felicity instructed, delivering pointed strike after strike, one with more force than the other until she collapsed against the leather of the punching bag. Wiping the sweaty hair out of her face, Thea sighed heavily. Felicity let go of the punching bag, letting it swing with Thea's weight against it while she retrieved their water bottles. Thea's eyes lit up when Felicity handed her her uncapped bottle between her boxing gloves, taking a large sip and gasping in relief. They were quiet for a while, both catching their breaths, letting their heartrates slow down a little.

"Can we do wing chun instead?" Thea asked, suddenly. Felicity's eyes went wide as she gulped down another sip of water."I think I got most of this week's anger out. I wanna go hand to hand." Making her eyes big and pushing out her bottom lip, Thea knew she could persuade her.

Felicity chuckled and shook her head. "Okay fine, but we don't have long. We don't want to be late for Laurel's party."

Thea excitedly clapped her gloved hands as they moved to the practice mat in the center of the gym. The gloves were quickly tossed to the side, next to the forgotten water bottles. Starting with the easy punches, the easily deflected, Felicity let Thea get into 'the flow' before increasing the pace and level of difficulty. Thea was getting quite good, but not as good as the years and years of training had made Felicity. Younger Queen was no match for her, but that didn't stop Thea for getting some strikes in. Thea was crafty and seized opportunities she saw in less than a split-second. And it worked. She couldn't defeat Felicity yet, but it wouldn't come as a surprise if she would be able to do so in the near future.

"Have you ever wondered where he learned all this stuff?" Thea asked after their third round of sparring.

Felicity froze. The question came seemingly out of nowhere but she understood exactly who and what Thea was talking about. Her father and his martial art skills. It wasn't that he was an uncomfortable subject for her to talk about, but she would still rather not associate with Malcolm Merlyn too much. He had his ways, in parenting, in business, etcetera, and Felicity didn't always approve of his methods. Hell, she full on disagreed with him on most subjects in general. Their relationship had always been strained, much more so after her mother had passed away, but he had thought her things that would always remind her of him no matter how hard she tried to forget.

She shrugged and reached down for her water bottle. "Not really. I always figured he did some traveling and maybe tried a 'reinventing yourself'-course or something after mom died."

"But why do you think he started training you?"

Felicity took a large swig from her water and frowned. "What's with all the questions about my dad?"

Lifting her shoulders, Thea held out her hand, immediately receiving the water bottle and taking a sip. "I don't know. I'm just curious. He's just… he always seems so closed off…"

"He is." Felicity interrupted her.

Thea sighed and let her head hang for a second. "I'm sorry, Lis. I shouldn't pry. I just thought maybe there's a good reason for his behavior."

Pursing her lips, Felicity shook her head and sighed. "It's okay, but even if there is some reason that would excuse his ways, I haven't found it in twenty three years so I doubt it is there to be found in the first place."

Thea nodded and smiled softly, sympathetically. "Let's change the subject. Like…" She trailed off, thinking of a new matter to discuss.

Her smile brightened. "Like, what are you gonna wear to Laurel's party?"

Felicity chuckled as they collected their gear, silently agreeing that the workout was over. "I was just gonna go with what I had on this morning." Felicity said as she pulled her towel from her duffel bag.

Thea tipped her head to the side and squinted a little. "Please, refresh my memory, cause even though I seem perfectly not hungover right now, I definitely was this morning and I didn't take notice of your outfit."

Felicity chuckled again and shook her head. "The floral blouse we bought in Coast City a while back and black skinny jeans."

Looking up, Felicity could see the wheels turning inside Thea's head. She was tugging at her bottom lip as she was thinking until one of her perfectly arched eyebrows flew up into her hairline.

"Now, the blouse I can work with! I'm not too sure about the skinnies."

"The invite said semi-formal!" Felicity argued.

She had a feeling this wasn't a battle she was going to win. If Thea was passionate about something, it was fashion and dressing people up. Felicity didn't mind, she always liked the clothes Thea picked out for her because she always kept in mind who she was dressing and what they liked. She took the unusual and brightly colored items Felicity loved and somehow always managed to create a classy outfit. They always went shopping together because Thea was also able to find great deals on designer items. Not that they really needed it, but there was something very satisfying about finding a piece for half the usual price.

"What did you have in mind for shoes?" Thea asked, pulling Felicity's attention back to the matter at hand.

"Uhm…" Felicity stammered. "I was gonna go with my panda flats."

Thea gasped."Felicity! Pleaselet me borrow you my Louboutins."

The door swung open revealing a smiling Laurel. She was wearing a stylish orange dress that suited her sun kissed skin perfectly. Excitement was radiating off of her and Felicity found herself already being uplifted by it.

"Hi guys! So glad you could be here!" She beamed.

The last three years had been kind to Laurel. She had matured, looking very sophisticated and professional. She had decided to enroll in law school and they were here to celebrate her passing of the BAR exam.

She and Tommy had been living together for little over a year now. They had found a beautiful penthouse downtown, near the university and Queen Consolidated, that they could afford with Tommy's new job as Junior Marketing Executive. It wasn't too extravagant, but the view was to die for. It was perfect for the young couple.

"Congratulations!" Felicity and Thea sang in accidental harmony. Laurel's smile grew impossibly wider as she stepped forward to embrace them both at the same time.

"Guys, thank you so much!"

"We brought you flowers!" Felicity laughed.

"And champagne!" Thea chimed in, holding up the bottle of Moët.

Chuckling, Felicity shook her head as they walked inside. The living room was scattered with guests, most of which Felicity had met before, some new faces. Altogether, it looked like everybody was having a good time.

"Don't worry, we brought you an actual gift too." She said as Laurel put the flowers in a vase.

"You didn't have too." Laurel smiled thankfully, accepting the little package Thea handed her.

"Of course we did! You graduated freaking law school. That's a big deal!" Thea squealed

Chuckling, Laurel ripped of the wrapping and opened the little box containing a thin gold chain and a tiny gold wishbone hanging from it. She sighed audible as she pulled it from the cushioning of the box, marveling at it as the necklace sparkled.

"Oh! It's beautiful! Thank you so much."

Thea smiled brightly "We figured it would bring you some luck on your fancy new job."

Laurel pulled both of them in for another hug and sighed, carefully draping the necklace back into the box.

"It's not that fancy. It's situated in the Glades and it's mostly charity work."

"That doesn't make it less amazing that you're doing it." Felicity said softly, earning a smile from Laurel.

"I just wanna help those in need of legal aid." She said.

"Laurel Lance. Always trying to save the world." A new voice said.

The women turned around to see a grinning Tommy leaning against the doorpost.

"Smoak! I was wondering where you were. I figured you'd be glued to her side all day." Felicity teased, gesturing in Laurel's direction.

Tommy chuckled and crossed the distance between them and kissed her on the cheek. "Good to see you too, Merlyn."

He turned to Thea. "Speedy."

Thea sighed audibly as he kissed her cheek and swatted at his chest playfully. That only seemed to make the nickname more fun for him. He moved to Laurel's side and kissed her temple. It was nauseatingly sweet.

"Can I talk to you for a second?" Tommy whispered in Felicity's ear as the conversation had continued. Thea had just asked Laurel more about her new job and Felicity had meant to listen when Tommy had jerked his head to the side. She frowned in confusion, but followed him anyway.

They ended up in his and Laurel's bedroom. Felicity sipped her drink calmly while Tommy paced back and forth.

"Are you okay? You seem nervous."

He let out a breathy laugh and nodded. "I am."

Frowning, Felicity tipped her head to the side. Tommy wiggled his eyebrows and reached into his jacket-pocket. He pulled out a square velvet box and Felicity immediately knew what it was. Her eyes went wide, lips forming an 'o' in astonishment.

"Oh. My. God." She whispered, hand flying up to cover her mouth. Tommy let out a breath he didn't know he had been holding and opened up the ring-box, revealing a cushion-cut diamond engagement ring. en/one-cushion-cut-diamond-micropav%C3%

Pressing her teeth into her bottom-lip, Felicity let her hand fall away from her mouth to cover her heart. She was having a hard time choking back the tears of happiness.

"You're gonna propose." It wasn't a question, just a statement. Tommy laughed nervously and nodded.

"Things are good. We're happy. So I thought, why wait."

Suddenly, Felicity unfroze, stepping forward and wrapping her arms around Tommy, hugging him tightly.

"Oh my god! I'm so happy for you guys!" She cooed.

Tommy chuckled. "You know, she has to say yes, first."

"Of course she's gonna say yes. I've known her for a long time and if the heart-eyes she gives you whenever you're in the room, she's head over heels in love with you. She's not gonna say no, Tommy."

Tommy smiled softly. "Thanks, Lis."

Felicity couldn't stop herself from giddily clapping her hands and jumping up and down. Tommy and Laurel had become two of her best friends and she wanted nothing more than for them to be happy.

"So, when were you gonna go down on one knee?"

"I was thinking today. All our friends are here to celebrate anyways."

"Oh no! no no-no, you're gonna want to wait a little while. You don't want to be a party freeloader. You know, use this party for like a million different things. Besides, you got to plan this properly, she's gonna remember this moment for the rest of her life, make it special. Take her to the beach, or to the place of your first date, or maybe her favorite restaurant."

"Our anniversary is coming up."

"Yes! That's perfect!" Felicity put a hand over her heart as she swooned like a schoolgirl at the thought of her two friends getting engaged.

"Oh, Oliver would have loved this. Seeing you two so happy." She sighed. She didn't miss the concern in Tommy's eyes. He smiled at her but the unspoken question hung in the air between them. Felicity let her head hang and pressed her lips together.

"Tommy, I'm fine." Lie number one.

She sat down on the bed and reached for his hand. "I'm moving on, I swear."

Lie number two.

"It's just…It's hard." Now that was the truth because knowing that Oliver was alive out there, somewhere, probably in horrible conditions, must have been the hardest thing Felicity had ever had to live with, worrying about him every day, wondering if he would come back.

She knew it was extremely unfair because of what Oliver had to deal with, but she was kind of mad at him. She wasn't able to move on, enjoy her life, find peace with his disappearance because she knew he was still out there, somewhere. Extremely unfair, but still the truth.

She was scared to admit it but she needed those workouts with Thea just as much as the latter did. Not only did they keep her busy, but just like Thea, she got to punch that pent up anger and worry and sadness right out of her.

"I worry about you, Lis." Tommy said, sitting down on the bed next to her.

"I want you to be as happy with someone as I am with Laurel."

Felicity smiled softly and bit her lower lip. "And I will be, someday. I just need a little time."

When Oliver would return home, she thought to herself. That would be the start of her being happy again. It would take a weight off of her shoulders she wasn't sure she could carry for much longer.

"Can I ask you something?" Tommy asked.

Felicity nodded. "Sure."

"What happened with that guy, Barry was his name I think?"

A breathy laugh escaped from her lips. "He was a nice guy, we had a scary lot in common, but we soon realized that we were both hung up on other people, so we ended it before it could get ugly."

"I'm sorry, Lis."

"It's okay. Like I said, I just need time. Laurel is your soulmate and Oliver is mine. I'm probably never going to be as happy as I was with him, but I'm trying." She squeezed Tommy's hand again and smiled a little.

The universe must have had pity on her right then because her phone started ringing. She scrambled for the piece of technology in her purse and frowned when she saw the caller-id.

"Hang on a second. It's Moira." Tommy nodded understandingly, raising his hand a little to wordlessly tell her to go ahead. Pressing the call button, Felicity put the phone to her ear.

"Hello."

"Felicity? It's Moira. Is Thea with you?"

Felicity's eyebrows knitted together. Moira sounded concerned and on edge, like she was nervous to tell her something.

"Yes, she is. She's just in the other room, do you want me to go get her?"

"No, that's okay, I just… could you both come to the house, please, it's important."

Felicity's heart started racing in her chest. "Of course. Is everything okay? Are you alright?"

"I'm fine dear. Never been better, actually." Moira let out a breathy laugh and then sniffled. Was she crying? Felicity pursed her lips.

"Moira, please tell me what's going on, you're freaking me out."

Another huff of air blown into the phone's microphone. "It's Oliver. They found him."