Jack: Do you miss him?
Martha: No. I made my choice! ... Maybe sometimes.

The next day Martha woke up and smiled. Had that really happened? It surely felt like a dream. But after she'd showered and dressed and made her way to the main area of the hub, Ianto greeted her with a hot cappuccino and a mischievous, knowing smile.

Not a dream then.

Martha took the coffee and smiled back at him, enjoying their little secret as Gwen and Tosh bustled in and prepared for the work day ahead of them.

"Doctor Jones!"

Martha jumped at the sound of Jack's voice, calling her from his office.

"Yes?"

"A word?" he requested.

"On my way!" she called back, and made her way to him.

She seated herself at his desk, sipping her delicious coffee. Jack was toying absentmindedly with a pair of paper 3-D glasses that dangled from a lampshade to his right. He only fidgeted when he was nervous. She sighed, realizing what was coming.

"I wanted to check in with you today," he said simply, looking up to meet her eyes. "Last night..."

"Was amazing," she assured him, holding up a hand to silence him as she spoke. She absolutely did not want to have a conversation about morality before breakfast. "Jack, I'm fine."

"It's okay if you aren't," he told her earnestly, without any of his typical flirting or teasing. "We all get caught up in the moment sometimes, and I know better than most people that choices made in the dark can look very different in the light of day."

"I knew what I was doing," she assured him. "I'm not like some poor Little Red Riding Hood waiting for the Big Bad Wolf to lead me astray."

Jack chuckled.

"Fair enough. If anyone here was ever led astray by the big Bad Wolf, I promise you it was me."

Martha was going to ask what he meant, but his eyes had gone to that far away place that meant he was lost for a moment in the distant past. Or future, as it were. She opted to let it go, instead gazing quietly at his lovely face, the brilliant blue of his eyes, and those soft lips she'd still never kissed. She really wished she hadn't made that stupid rule.

"I know you have an amazing, gorgeous, talented medical doctor at home waiting for your return," he commented when he came back to himself.

"Yeah, I guess I do," she replied, anxiety creeping into her guts. She didn't really want to think about this before breakfast either.

Jack raised an eyebrow at the uncertainty in her tone.

Martha looked back at him and sighed.

"I'm just... not sure about him," she confessed. "He's crazy about me. I know he's going to ask me to marry him soon..."

"And what's so bad about that?" Jack asked.

"It's just... I first met him... when the world was ending. He was amazing. He was kind to me. He was so wonderful I had to seek him out again afterwards. But... All of the things that first made me love him..."

"They never happened," he finished, understanding immediately. Of course he understood.

"Right. And I keep telling myself that no one knows, that no one will ever be able to know what it was like, what we went through, so wishing for that sort of connection is pointless. I know that's true. And he's still the same wonderful man I knew before, even if he doesn't remember meeting me the first time. But... I dunno. Never mind me. Emotional Martha, doesn't know how to accept the good things in her life without making them hard."

Jack reached across the desk to take her hand in his.

"It is hard. You're not making it hard. But I would regret if our actions last night made it harder. You're my friend first, Martha. Before any of the other crap."

She smiled at him and shrugged.

"Last night happened because I wanted it to happen. I have to lie and omit so many things to Tom anyway, between The Year and my work at UNIT, just to seem like I'm not a total nutter and that I'm capable of having a normal relationship. What's one more?"

Jack knit his eyebrows and the empathy in his beautiful blue eyes made her stomach ache. He wasn't going to say it but his thoughts showed plain on his face: no one who had experienced things like they had would ever really be "normal," again, would they?

They had traveled with the Doctor and seen things most people couldn't even dream of. They survived the end of the world and turned back time. Jack was from a planet the human race wouldn't see for millennia, and had been rendered immortal by a force he could never fully understand. They were both damaged and scarred and world weary and most people would never even believe their war stories if they told them. "Normal" would never again be anything more than a charade for them, and they both knew it.

Jack stood and came around the desk, offering a hand to help her out of her chair.

"You'll figure it out, Martha Jones," he said, pulling her into a warm, close hug. "And no matter what happens, I want to say thank you for last night. It was absolutely fantastic."

It was time to go home.

Owen smiled at her, looking as close to happy as she'd seen him since the terrible incident that had taken his life.

And saved yours, she reminded herself somberly.

She smiled laughed as he told her there were no vacancies yet for her at Torchwood, and she did her best to return his lighthearted banter. But when they hugged she found she had trouble letting go of his too-cold body, lost in thought about what he'd gone through and the debt she owed him.

"Oi," Jack called after a while, startling her out of her reverie. She and Owen stepped back, and she said her farewells to the rest of the team, smirking just a little at the delicate, chaste kiss on the cheek Ianto gave her.

Such a contrast, she thought to herself, to the kisses I saw him exchange with Jack...

They were good together, Jack and Ianto. Martha hoped they would be able to overcome their communication problems and find happiness together. Not that she had any place to judge anyone about communication problems.

She hugged Gwen fondly, then finally, she approached Jack, suddenly reluctant to leave. So few people understood her the way he did. So few people could ever really know her.

"Well," she said, smiling up at him, "It's been... interesting."

"Oh," Jack scoffed dismissively, "it's been fun! You know it has."

She smiled up at him as he spoke, entranced by his glittering eyes. And then, overwhelmed by all of the emotions and the "what-ifs" that filled her thoughts, she flung herself towards him, pressing her lips desperately to his for just a moment.

He looked at her, thoughtful and curious, as she pulled away. After everything, in the end she had broken her own rule.

"Well, everyone else has had a go!" she laughed, trying to keep the depths of her emotions out of her tone. She suddenly desperately wanted to throw herself back into his arms and beg him to take her back to the hub for even just one more night.

Jack wasn't fooled by her bravado. He walked up to her and cradled her face in his warm hand, his gentle kindness bringing tears to her eyes.

"You can so come back anytime," he promised her.

Martha smiled, knowing he wasn't just offering her a job. He was offering her solace, understanding, and companionship.

"Well," she told him, "maybe I will... One day."

In that moment she wanted nothing more than to stay, in a place where she didn't feel quite so alone, but she knew she'd never be able to live with the guilt of abandoning the duty she felt to UNIT, and to Tom. She owed them better than that. And running away from worries rarely solved them in the long term.

Traveling with the Doctor had changed her. The Master had broken her, in ways from which she would never recover. She was battered and damaged and the girl she had been when she met the Doctor was gone forever, replaced by a hardened, worldly young woman with nerves of steel and a will of iron.

But we all change, she realized. Everyone grows up. Everyone leaves behind the child they once were. My time with the Doctor changed me, sure. But without him, where would I be? He gave me the confidence I need to be who I am. He gave Jack a moral compass and the drive to make the world a better place. He showed us a better way to see the universe. A better way to live our lives. And now it's time for me to go live mine.

And so Martha Jones took her bags, smiled one final time at Jack and the Torchwood crew, and took the first steps towards home.

Jack: I'd rely on Martha if the world was ending... And in fact, I did.

A/N: And here we are finally at the end. I've really had a good time here, exploring the ways the Doctor affects people, both positively and negatively, once he's gone... the way he changes them. I hope you've enjoyed reading my take on it. I've also enjoyed sharing my headcanon about Martha's reasons for eventually leaving Tom Mulligan. I think both Martha and Jack have a tendency to be written as very two-dimensional, a lot of the time, which is a shame since they're both so very complex... and I really hope I've managed to do them justice here for you. Thank you for reading! Have a wonderful day. xxo! -O.A.