Disclaimer: Regular updates and myself don't work very well together ;)

Well...guess I've got some explaining to do eh? It's been well over my normal month long hiatus between each chapter, and for that I'm very sorry. I couldn't seem to find the time to write, edit, or do much else that had to do with this account. Although this one's totally on me, I really just didn't write when I should've! Anyways, new chapter, new plot, and hopefully new me? We'll see how this chapter does and if people still want more I'll finish this story. For all the people who're still here, thanks a ton! All of the reviews you left me really felt pretty cool to see, and I'll get the next chapter of my other story out when I can. I'll talk to you all later and feel free to ask me if you have any more ideas you think would be cool. Stay rad and take care everyone 3

-Shade

"Ouch."

I glanced down at my chest, which was very lightly scratched, then turned my attention to the familiar scene laid out in front of me. An empty black plain that stretched as far as I could see, my body already injured, and a very angry Pokémon nose-to-nose with me.

"You deserve that, you know." the rat-like Electric-type hissed. I took a small step back at the sight of lightly sparking cheeks.

I simply nodded. "I do. I suppose that Arceus has already told you about these special...circumstances...but just to make sure, do you know why we're here?"

The Raichu pushed me away and glared at me crossly. "Of course I know. I'm here to make peace with you for killing me in cold blood."

"Correction, self-defense. You do recall that you hit me with that Thunderbolt first, and that I attempted to flee before you cornered me?"

Her glare chewed into my pelt unforgivingly. "Come to think of it, you look different now than you did back then. Your eyes are different."

"Basically, yes. What else about me looks different?" I asked, already knowing the answer that would come from her next.

"You're bigger. Way bigger." she said slowly, sizing me up.

I nodded. "Your boss started sending mercenaries to kill me, and you just happened to be one of the first ones. You attacked me three days after I beat Devil, so I naturally didn't want to kill you, but you left me no choice."

"Please. Even now you're a monster, and nothing can ever change that." she scoffed.

"I know that more than any of you can tell me, because I have to live with myself every single day. But why do you think I agreed to do this? I'm not doing this for redemption or even for myself. I'm only doing this so hopefully each and every one of you can stop hating me and understand that I did what I had to do."

She looked at me again, and I could tell that she was still unwavering in her beliefs of what I did.

"You can see into my memories as a spirit, correct?" I asked, moving away from the point for a second.

She kept her eyes trained onto me and nodded slightly. "Yeah. What's it to you?"

"Have you looked at any of them?" I asked.

She looked at me like I was a complete idiot and snorted in contempt. "Why would I want to look at a mass-murderer's memories?"

I held my gaze with her. "What's your earliest memory as an infant?" I asked, ignoring the insult.

"Excuse me?" she asked.

"What's the earliest thing that you can remember? The first thing that you can ever recall seeing?" I sat down on the black floor and tried to look friendly.

"What are you trying to do?" she asked cautiously. "I'm not playing any of your psychotic games to trick me into telling you secrets, am I?"

I groaned in discontent. "We're both here until we can come to an agreement, okay? Just do it, what's the worst that can happen?"

She opened her mouth and I stopped her. "Scratch that. I don't want to hear what you think I'll do. Please, answer the question."

She sighed. "Okay. I guess I have no choice...besides, just being around you again is making me sick."

"Can you just tell me? Please?" I asked, slightly annoyed that the Electric Mouse Pokémon wasn't cooperating at all.

"I remember the same things that every wild Pokémon remembers. Hatching out of an egg, playing with some other Pokémon and growing up. There's not much else to our lives, as I'm sure as you know." she said, clicking her tongue at me. "In any case, you know it the same as I do. Rumor has it that you were a demon sent down by Arceus to test our faith."

I chuckled in laughter. "Really. There's others that actually believe that's true?"

She nodded. "I believed that wholeheartedly when I was alive, but after being killed by you and having Arceus deny that you were a real demon, well, that kind of cleared things up a bit."

But as quickly as she had softened, her gaze steeled itself again and her lip curled up in a snarl. "So tell me, what was the point of that question?"

I got up and shook my head lightly. "I still find it so hard to believe that so many of my own kind still think I'm some type of monster. True, I have killed an outrageous number of them, and I have been completely ruined by that, but I started off much differently than all of you."

"Care to explain? Because you're still a murderer, no matter what you do to try and fix it." she spat, her voice dripping with malice.

"You know that these..." I said, motioning to my green rings and my electric-blue eyes. "Aren't what I was born with with." I said softly. "I was actually born with blue rings and yellow eyes. What's known as a 'shining' Pokémon in these regions."

"So what? You still got those colors from being a monster, but the eyes are new. I don't know how they got there, but I also don't care. By the way, I know what a shiny is." she scoffed.

"Surely you know what being shiny means to others in this world." I said, looking to her for her reply. She shook her head and looked at me for the answer.

I sighed. "It's rare. And what do people do when something is rare? They take it for themselves."

"Aw cut to the chase already! I don't want a whole story on how special you are, just tell me what your first memory was so we can be finished here." she hissed angrily.

I stared at her dead in the eyes. "Fear. I was captured before I could hardly walk and never saw the outside of my Pokéball except when my idiot of a trainer decided to show me off to some of his friends."

"I honestly don't care-" she started to say.

"A trophy. That's all I was. A fucking prize that wasn't even good enough to use in battle because he wouldn't let me try. All he ever told me was that I was too weak. Eventually, I stopped being a prize, I had become a liability. A pain, weight, baggage that was lost and forgotten to the person who had taken my life away from me." I spat, trembling slightly in pure rage.

"Do you know what that's like? To be told to your face that you weren't good enough and denied every opportunity to get better when all you wanted was to please the one person in your life that was there?"

"I don't-"

"Do you? Answer me!"

"I can't really say-"

"Exactly. You can't say because you don't know what that feels like to be completely hopeless."

"Listen to me! I may not know what that felt like in my life, but I know how you felt!" she said loudly, trying to get my attention.

"You can't possibly have known how I-"

"No no, I mean that I actually know how you felt." she said. "Y'know, since us spirits have the ability to see into your past memories and all that..."

"Oh. I didn't think about that." I said coldly. "Well, now that you know all about that, you can go. After all, to a spoiled Pokémon like you, this doesn't really matter, does it?"

I turned away but the Pikachu spoke. "I know that you did a lot of bad things, things that I actually can't forgive you for."

I knew it. Some of them cant forgive me for what I've done...

"But. I can see now that you did what you had to, albeit in a way that I wouldn't have expected. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I don't forgive you, but I see that you want to try to change. And if you can do that, then I'll be able to leave this world in peace." she said softly, giving me a small smile.

"U-Um...thank you. And I promise that I'm trying my hardest to turn myself around, even if it's not the best thing to be doing at a time like this with tons of others who still want to kill me." I said.

"Believe me. It's the best thing to be doing, no matter how hard it is. So I'll let you go back to the real world for now, but don't forget that you'll have to face me again sometime and prove that you've completely changed. Got that?" she asked strongly.

"Got it. I'll show you how far I can go." I replied, nodding my head.

She smiled and walked away, then stopped and started to speak without looking back.

"I haven't forgotten about Nawto either, and you know that you'll have to deal with him at some point too. If I was you then I wouldn't expect it to be too long either. The kid's as sharp as can be, considering he was on your side." she muttered, then walked away and disappeared from sight.

I haven't forgotten either. Not by a long shot.

I closed my eyes as I felt the world from around me being sucked away, and fell into a fitful sleep.

"Yoohoo? Shaaaaade? Wake up sleepyhead, it's morning y'know!"

"Hmm?" I mumbled drowsily as I opened my eyes. I was greeted to an Espeon staring me from a few inches away, which surprised me more than it should have.

"Jolt, Ary, and Arc are all waiting for you! Even that weird guy from yesterday from the Black Hawks. We're waiting to go to their base, so get up!"

"Visho's waiting, huh?" I asked, rolling out of bed and wincing slightly as I felt the dull ache of my ribs crash into my senses, barely noticing Shine nod in reply.

Right. I guess that Pikachu did more damage than I had previously thought...tch.

"I'll be waiting for you when you're ready to head out, alright?" Shine asked as she walked out of the door.

"Sure thing Nawto-" I said absentmindedly. "-er. I mean Shine."

Shine turned around and glanced at me with a curious look on her face. "Nawto? Who's that?"

I waved my paw nervously. "No one. Sorry I guess I'm still not quite awake yet..." I muttered.

Shine looked at me curiously, but ended up just shrugging. "You didn't sleep very well last night. You were shaking for a few hours and then you calmed down. Everything...okay?"

I smiled weakly. "As good as they can be right now."

She nodded. "That's all I can ask for. Now get downstairs! We're waiting!" she demanded in a jokingly serious tone, then walked out of the room, leaving me alone.

"Nawto...I never thought I would have to hear that name again..." I sighed. "It makes it even worse that she said the exact same thing he used to say every morning. Arceus, that kid was annoying."

I walked into the shower and half-heartedly washed my fur, my mind in a much different place. The forgotten Pokémon's raspy voice rang throughout my head as the water poured over my dark fur.

"Yo Shade! Imma wait here until you get your lazy self ready, alright?"

"I still don't know how I agreed to let him stay with me...that kid talked me into it faster than I thought possible..."

I gently raised my power level and pushed the energy out from my body, effectively drying my fur in seconds.

I walked out of the door and down the stairs, still thinking about other things, and ran face-first into a large Scrafty.

"Oh, I'm sorry about that." I said, picking the orange Pokémon up.

"Jeez, that's my second time in two days. I must be a magnet to bad luck..." he said with a smile. "Do I know you from somewhere?"

I looked him over and shook my head. "I don't believe we've met. I'm very sorry but I have somewhere to be right now.. Have a nice day!" I said with a smile and walked past him.

I stepped downstairs and groaned internally as I saw Visho sitting down with my team.

"That guy just doesn't quit, does he..." I said under my breath as I walked towards them.

"Oh Shade! Can I call you Shade?" he asked cheerfully.

"I'm sure you'll call me that no matter what I say." I said flatly, half-joking.

He smiled. "A sense of humor! I like that!"

"You seem to like a lot of things about me." I observed.

"Well, I'm still kind of worried that you're going to decline my offer so I'm trying to be very sweet to you." he admitted, letting a loud laugh roll through the room.

"You don't have to do that anymore. I believe that joining that Black Hawks is the best thing to do right now to protect my team." I said.

"Wonderful! We know that you'll love the position we have laid out for you-"

"Let's make one thing clear. I'm not doing this for me. I'm doing this for the sole reason of keeping my team safe. Let anything happen to them, and we'll have problems. Got it?" I spat.

His mood changed and he looked very serious. "I understand completely. Your team will be among the safest Pokémon in the world under my staff's care. But we need you to focus on the task at hand."

"Taking down Team Plasma's headquarters and finding Master?" I asked.

"Yes and no. That is our main goal, but our first objective is to train you." he said, somewhat nervously.

"Train him?" Shine asked.

"Yeah, for what?" Jolt added.

"He can already kick major ass as it is, what does he need more training for?" Arc chimed in.

"Very good questions. Shade, as you are, my staff can't work with you. You may be an absolutely amazing solo fighter, but you have to be able to fight with a team to make this work." he admitted. "On top of that, you're a very hard mix to work with. As you may know, there's two types of fighters in the world. Calm and Kinetic. Calm-"

"Calm fighters stay calm and draw their power by intense concentration. Kinetic fighters get psyched up and release their power by releasing their rage." Arylide said. She blushed as we all looked at her and chuckled. "I'm not just some dumb Vulpix y'know..."

"Well that's completely right. Shade, in your fights you mix Calm and Kinetic. That's an extremely dangerous method, and one that could end up killing you. I myself am a Calm fighter, and it's important that you figure out what you are. If you keep drawing power from your positive and negative chi, it will not end well." he said grimly.

"Then the deal's off." I said softly.

"What?! Why?" Visho exclaimed. "Don't you want to protect your team like you said that you did?"

"Of course I do." I said. "They mean the world to me."

"Then why can't you just-"

"I can't...change." I muttered.

"Please explain what's happening?" Shine whined in exasperation.

"Shine, you aren't a fighter so it wouldn't make a whole lot of sense to you." Visho said sympathetically. "It depends on how the fighter releases energy."

"I can't change...because I already know which one that I am. I'm a Calm fighter but since I've been trained in combat I have Kinetic moments. After all, I was 'trained' as a street fighter. Nothing more, nothing less." I said lowly.

"Shade. You know how dangerous that is, correct?" Visho asked in a grave tone.

"It's only dangerous if I let it get to me. I'm only able to use Kinetic power when my life is in danger. I'm a Calm fighter for most of the time." I explained.

Visho shook his head. "I can't allow my men to be around that. They're already antsy enough by who you are. Part of the deal was that I would make you a team

player."

"You can't make me into anything you please. I'll become whatever I want." I growled. "And if your men don't want to work with me because of my past then I'll leave right now."

Visho looked at me intensely and I matched his gaze.

"Can you help my team more than you can hurt it?" his eyes seemed to say.

"Can you protect my team well enough?" I silently replied.

Jolt stopped our silent conversation by clearing his throat. "Are you two alright?"

Visho looked at me one more time, and I replied by giving him a slight nod. We both knew what question he was asking.

"We're fine. And we have our answer. So who wants to see the facility?" Visho asked. enthusiastically

"Wait." I said coldly. "Before we go, dismiss your men."

Visho looked at me and chuckled. "What are you talking about? I came alone!"

I stared at him with malice in my eyes. "Don't lie to me."

Visho gave me a nervous smile and waved his three-fingered hand over his head with a sigh. Almost instantly, four Pokémon walked out from the corners of the room and another three stood up at tables around us.

"Y-You were watching us?" Shine gasped.

The men didn't move a muscle.

"Now, don't be mad. Please. I only did this because I didn't know how you would react to my requests, so I had to take every precaution that I could-"

"Shade isn't some monster you know! You can't just do that and expect us to follow through with whatever the hell you want to do to us!" Arc spat angrily.

"Arc, quite the contrary. You haven't known me long enough to say something like that. I am, in fact, a monster. Visho knows that and did this to protect everyone in this town, not just himself." I said lowly. "If I got out of control...lets just say that he did the appropriate thing."

I flicked my eyes toward the Medicham. "That is the reason, correct?"

Visho scratched the back of his head and nodded silently. "The mission of the Black Hawks is defense. We hardly ever go on the offensive side, but with all the Pokémon that Plasma is taking...we need hell on our side. And Shade..." he said with his eyes full of admiration mixed with fear. "You're the closest thing that we can get to Hell that has a chance of making this work."

I nodded and stood up. Visho's men flinched slightly at the sudden movement and watched me nervously.

I didn't pay any attention to them and looked at my team. "Is everyone here up for this? If you decline now, no one will judge you. You'll still have my utmost respect. I'd be more than okay with all of you staying at the Black Hawks base and leaving this to me."

They all looked at each other, then nodded and looked back at me with the same expression. They told me something that words couldn't explain, but in a way that let me know exactly what they meant. They put trust in me.

"If that's the choice, then may Arceus be with us." I said softly, then turned around and dipped my head towards Visho.

He nodded. "Again, I'm very sorry for not telling you about the men. It was just security in case you went and did something that I couldn't control on my own."

I shrugged. "I'm quite impressed. I didn't notice them until you got up. They started to get up too and that threw the whole disguise."

Visho smiled. "You honestly are as good as they say. I'm looking forward to working with you, Shade."

Surprisingly, I smiled back. "I didn't think I would feel this way, but I'm looking forward to it as well. Anything to save those Pokémon in that warehouse."

Visho stood up and walked to the door. "Our headquarters is slightly secluded. Strictly speaking, it'll be hard to come back if you forget something. Get all of your things and we'll be on our way, alright?"

I nodded. "We'll meet you here in ten minutes."

I turned away from Visho and walked back up the stairs without turning back. My heart pounded with a mix of anger, fear, and a small twinge of excitement.

Why the hell am I excited? If we fail the mission, everything I've grown to know and love are all going to be obliterated and I'll have failed my real mission. I swear to Arceus, this is getting too hard for-

"Well well. Look who's going to give up."

Shut the hell up. I'm not in the mood for your stupid mind games. In any case, they don't work and you know it.

"That might be true. But who saved your little lady from that Zoroark? Was it you, or was it because I managed to slip out?"

It was me. You're nothing unless I'm here, and that means I don't have to take orders from you anymore.

"It's quite amazing, really" my past self mused, "that Arceus was able to completely drive me out of your conscience. For now, I'll leave you alone."

Really?

"Don't thank me just yet, I'm only curious. I have the most power, but somehow you're able to maintain control of this body with almost no issue at all. It's...perplexing."

I'm stronger than you are.

"Don't get too cocky. You'd be amazed at what I could do if you just let me give you-"

No. Unless they're in danger I'm not going to resort to that.

"Suit yourself. Looks like your little lady is following you, by the way. Don't let her get killed..."

Say that again and you'll regret it.

"Alright, I'm going. Keep your calm, Mr. Do-Gooder."

"Hey! Shade!" the Espeon's voice called. "What's the matter?"

I blinked and realized that I had been staring at a wall, lost in thought while my other side was talking to me in my head. "Uh...nothing. We should get packing though, we don't wanna be late."

Shine chuckled. "Shade. We don't have anything with us. All we have is that tiny little pouch of Berries, and those really aren't going to be needed where we're going."

I nodded absentmindedly, not even listening to her. "Yeah, let's go get the others then."

Arc hopped up the stairs and nudged me. "Come on old man, get a move on!" he exclaimed excitedly, then hopped down the stairs again.

I smirked, still deep in my thoughts. "It doesn't matter how fast you run Nawto, I can still catch you with no sweat!"

He turned around. "Nawto? Who's that?"

I clamped my maw shut and looked at Arc. "Uh...did I saw Nawto? I must've been thinking of someone else..." I trailed off. Arc looked at me and shrugged.

"You must be getting old if you can't remember my name anymore! We'll be downstairs!" he yelled, taking them three at a time without looking back.

"Kids are such a pain sometimes..." I mused aloud, and Shine giggled happily.

"Of course they are, but don't you just love them anyways?" she sighed dreamily. My eyes went as wide as saucers and I decided to change the topic before she got any ideas.

"Um, right. Ready to go?" I asked quickly. "Don't want to keep Visho waiting!"

I slipped out of the door and padded downstairs, alone with my thoughts.

I have to forget about that. It's in the past.

"Hey! Shade! Did you know that they sell Items here?!" Arc called from somewhere to my right.

I nodded absentmindedly. "Sounds good. Don't spend all of our cash though."

Arc scowled. "Don't worry, for some reason Jolt won't trust me with the money..."

A long sigh came from Jolt. "Kid, if we trusted you with the money, there wouldn't be any money left!"

Arc shrugged. "Whatever. Oh sweet! Shade come look at this!"

I walked over to the stand and looked at Arc expectantly. "What's up?"

He pointed towards a group of small stones. "What are those?!" he asked in awe.

I eyed them for a few seconds before I realized what they were. "Those are evolution stones."

"Like what an Eevee uses to evolve?" Arylide asked. I nodded gently.

"Yeah. Eevees like Jolt had to use a stone to evolve. Shine and I evolve in a slightly...different manner." I said thoughtfully.

"How?" Arc asked in awe.

I looked at him strangely. "You don't know? I thought kids learned about the different evolutions in school when they're young."

Arc chuckled softly. "Yeah. If you've forgotten, the only 'school' I've had was what the other test subjects told me." I turned to look him in the eyes and saw the icy coldness in his eyes.

"I...sorry. I forgot." I sighed. "Really though, I won't forget again."

But in true Arc fashion, the look was washed away in an instant. "Don't stress over it man. Are you okay? You seem kinda off."

I smirked. "I'll be fine. Get Ary and the rest of the team together. I'd really not prefer to stay any longer than we have to."

Arc nodded. "Are you coming?" I nodded and motioned for him to give me a second. He shrugged in reply then walked outside to search for the rest of our team.

"Anything I can help you with, sir?" a small Fenniken behind the counter asked. "We sell specialty items too!"

I motioned towards a small bell behind a group of Berries. "How much is that?"

"That old bell? Gosh, I couldn't imagine selling that for anything over five Poké. But why do you want that old thing?" the fire type asked.

I placed five Poké on the table and picked up the trinket. "It's for a friend. If I'm right, it may be pretty helpful when the time comes. If I'm not, then it's only five Poké. Have a nice day!" I explained, picking up the bell and tucking it into the bag of supplies that Shine was carrying.

"Shade, maybe you could help me with this instead of flirting with the salesgirl." the Espeon said icily.

"W-What?! No, he wasn't- I mean, he would never- I would never- You've got it wrong!" she blurted out with her cheeks the color of her tail.

Shine winked at me. "Don't worry, if he went for anyone else I'd be sure that he never saw the sun again."

The Fenniken forced a small laugh and suddenly seemed very interested in checking the shop's inventory.

"What was that all about?" I asked quietly as I picked up Shine's bag.

She smiled. "You didn't notice? That poor girl couldn't take her eyes off of you for the whole time we were there."

I felt myself turn multiple shades of red all at once. "You and I both know that you're messing with me."

Shine just shrugged. "I knew just how she felt. Now come on! I want to get a move on so we can get out of here faster. This place creeps me out ever since that Vendrid guy showed up."

I silently agreed as I carried the bags towards the group of Pokémon outside of the hotel, then turned and took one last look.

I'm doing the right thing...right? Everyone's talked about me as though I'm safe, but maybe Visho's right. Should I even be around people that I care about?

"Tch. You're so soft that it's beginning to amuse me."

Am I really? Then tell me what you would do in a situation like this.

"Easy. First I would kill-"

Forget that I even asked.

"Your choice. But if you let me out...I can't guarantee anyone's safety. It's still such a shame. If only I was in control we would be so much better off."

I'm still up for that partnership.

"I'll take a rain check. Go and have fun playing with a team."

"Shaaaade! Come on!"

I turned towards my team and began to walk towards them. Between their smiling faces and their bubbly spirits, I realized that I didn't fit in. But I could do one thing, and only one thing. I could protect them.

I swear...I swear I won't let you end up like Nawto.

I grimaced at the thought as I walked towards the group of Pokémon and stopped as a wind blew over the clearing, a trickle of words almost seeming to slip past the leaves of the trees and the blades of grass, making their way to my tall black ears. The sound was barely louder than the rustle of leaves swaying in the trees, but the sound came to me in perfect clarity.

"Remember...why...you're here..."

Reviews:

Since I was gone for so long the reviews are a complete shitshow of asking if I died and if the story's dead. More people seemed to care about the story than me...hm. (I'm just kidding)

I am not dead and the story isn't either! It just may be in a coma from time to time! As for all of the reviews, I read them all and appreciate them all even more! I'll be sure to answer all the new ones next time and I'm really sorry that I'm making a blanket statement to cover all of you ;-; But there's too many to answer all at once. Thanks for understanding! Love you all and stay awesome/crazy for sticking around!

-Shade