Bouncing Back

By Michael Weyer

I don't own Once Upon a Time. Obvious spoilers for 4X12.

Hard drinking was never something Belle had been into. It hadn't been that way with her old life back in the Enchanted Forest and not in her years locked up. There had been that brief Lacey period but she preferred to forget that as much as she could. After all, it had simply helped push her into her current situation. She sighed as she sipped from her glass, no longer feeling the bitterness of the alcohol in her throat. She placed it on the counter as she sighed, tired of this.

"I'd say penny for your thoughts but in this town, stuff like that can come true."

Belle glanced up to see Ruby sauntering toward her, a light smile on her face. The brunette was dressed in one of her usual fun outfits, tights under a red mini-skirt, red vest over black blouse and a red cap on her long mane of hair. "Hey," Belle greeted her friend. "Haven't seen you around lately."

Ruby sat on the stool next to her. "What that Shattered Sight curse hit…well, you know my own dark side." Belle winced in sympathy as Ruby went on. "It was…not nice. Thankfully, made it to the outskirts of town before it hit so I just ran around the woods, didn't meet anyone until after it was broken."

"Glad you made it out," Belle said.

Ruby made a motion to the bartender and a few moments later had her own glass beside her. She looked to Belle and her smile faded. "I…heard. About you and Gold."

"Sure all over town by now."

"It is," Ruby admitted. "Can I say something?"

"As long as it's not 'I told you so.'"

"It's not." Ruby sipped her drink. "What were you thinking?"

Belle gaped at her. "What were you thinking? 'What you were thinking" is an 'I told you so!'"

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" Ruby defended herself. "But seriously, what were you thinking?!"

"I loved him."

"The Dark One? You know, all those books of yours, you should look up Stockholm Syndrome, explains a whole lot."

Belle glared. "You didn't know him, Ruby. He…he was a good man. Deep down, he was. You knew Neal, you saw that."

"Just because he had some goodness in him doesn't mean it stayed," Ruby said. "We've seen enough of that."

"Evil isn't born, it's made," Belle retorted. "I've read enough to know that. We've seen people change. Regina, for example."

"Yeah but Gold?" Ruby shook her head. "Power is the only thing he ever truly loved, Belle."

"I know." Belle looked down at the bar. "I can see it now. I just…I just wanted to believe…" She rubbed her face. "I wanted him to change, Ruby. To be the man I wanted."

"We all want that," Ruby admitted in a softer voice. "To see the best in people. But sometimes…well, the best just isn't enough. Maybe, somewhere deep down, there was good in Gold but…Not anymore."

"I tried so hard," Belle went on. "I fought for it, searched for it and along the way…I lost myself. I turned…into someone I wasn't."

"Yeah, Lacey."

"No…I mean, yes…" Belle took another drink. "That…was not a happy time. It just brought out my dark side and the fact I liked Rumple that way…"

"That should have been a red flag."

"Red flag. That supposed to be a joke?"

"Sorry. I just mean…" Ruby sighed. "I'm not trying to make you feel worse, really. It's just that if there's one constant, no matter the realm, you never let yourself change for a guy. It never goes well."

Belle was silent for a long moment. "You're right. I did change. I lost my way. I was so busy trying to see the good in him…I missed it in myself."

Ruby was quiet before moving her hand to Belle's. The other brunette looked over, touched at the smooth skin. "It's there," Ruby said in a soft voice. "I can see it." She pulled it back, sighing. "I just…Part of me can almost understand Gold. After all…I know what it's like to have a monster inside me."

"You are not a monster."

"I killed my boyfriend."

"Not you. The Wolf."

"It's different?"

Belle turned her around. "Yes. It is. You didn't choose it. You can't really control it. Rumple…He made his choice. Again and again. He could have chosen to be happy with me and let power go…But he couldn't. He didn't."

Ruby smiled softly. "You're right. He didn't. Always remember that. What happened to him was not your fault. You shouldn't feel bad about driving him away."

"I don't," Belle quickly said. "I…" She paused as if reflecting on her words. "I really don't. Huh…I mean, I feel bad about how it ended but…It's not tearing me up." She sipped. "I love him…Part of me still does at least but…" Her lips turned up a bit. "I'm not in love with him. Not anymore."

"Were you? Ever really?"

Belle examined her glass. "I'm starting to wonder…If it was true love…Or just an adventure and being somewhere I felt I belonged."

Ruby was quiet for a moment. "I know how that feels. I wanted to belong with my mom, my pack, I wanted it…" She brushed her hair back. "But I realized that it wasn't for me. It wasn't what I wanted, to be such an outsider. I had to be myself, no matter what."

"That's what I need," Belle announced. "To be myself. Not his girl, not the damsel. Just me, Belle."

"Good," Ruby said. "Like I said, the guy's hurt you so many times before, don't let him win now by having you feel so guilty."

Belle smiled. "Thanks. I needed this. I mean it, I needed to clear my head on all this."

Ruby lifted a glass. "See, this is why I hated seeing you with him so much. Ruined the great talks we had."

"You always did get me."

"Well, you're Beauty and I'm a beast, makes sense."

The two were smiling just as they felt a presence and turned to see Regina and Emma coming up. "Belle, hey." Emma moved to give her a hug. "How are you?"

"Getting better," Belle confessed. "It's hard but I'll make it."

"Take it from someone who knows about revenge," Regina said with a cool smile. "Living well really is the best type."

"I'll get her started on that," Ruby intoned with a grin.

Regina looked to her with a raised eyebrow before looking back to Belle. "We do need to talk about Gold's shop. There's no telling what sort of things he's got in there that can cause damage."

"I know," Belle sighed. "But I know Rumple and my guess is he's got the place laid with magical traps to keep us from getting at anything."

"Maybe they faded when he crossed the line," Emma suggested.

"Maybe," Regina agreed. "First thing tomorrow we start going through it." Her lips pursed. "There might be something there I need…"

"Regina…" Emma began dangerously. "We talked about this…"

"Oh, relax, Ms. Swan, I'm not going to make his mistakes and plot to undo the barrier."

"Sure? You said you wanted to find that writer…"

"For Henry's sake, I'm trying to change."

"Just him?"

"Who else?" Regina moved to the other end of the bar. "Now, come on, Ms. Swan, you owe me a night as a drinking buddy." With a wave to the two brunettes, Emma followed her.

Ruby chuckled and shook her head. "Geez, when are those two going to just get a room already?"

Belle chuckled as well. "Granny still running the pool?"

"Yep, pretty big pot now." She looked at Belle. "Are you still going to stay at the shop?"

Belle shook her head. "No. No, I can't…I can't be there. Not now."

"There's room at our place."

"Ruby, you don't…"

"Nope, not hearing a denial here. Step two on your road to recovery is not letting you mope around alone in an empty apartment."

"What's step one?"

In answer, Ruby picked up a bottle from the bar to pour into her glass, then Belle's. She raised her ups, Belle doing the same as they clinked them together and then downed in unison. "Ah, that is tasty," Belle said.

Ruby giggled as she poured again. "To Gold, may he rot in Hell."

"Feisty, Ruby."

"Oh, I'm just getting started."

The two laughed together as they drank once more to open a new chapter to their lives.

All comments welcomed.