Author's note: To say that I am annoyed with what is happening in the show would be an understatement. And then I thought, I have an account here, why not use it?

I realize that the events in this story would probably never really happen. But, well, everyone can dream, right?

Hell yes, right!

Enjoy. :)

Caroline's cheek pressed into the cold glass of the window.

'' Where is he? It's almost eight. ''

'' Speaking of the time, '' Bonnie began uncertainly. '' When... can we... go home? ''

The words tumbled out of her mouth, clinking against each other softly, like she was already waiting to be scolded. Because she knew what was coming.

One. Two.

Three.

Caroline's head snapped in her direction abruptly. '' What? No way! I'm staying the whole night, as planned. ''

Bonnie sighed. '' Okay, I'll just get a taxi. ''

'' No, no, no, '' the blonde girl protested, pulling her friend back by the arm. '' Seriously? ''

Before Bonnie could even utter another word, Caroline stuck a finger into her face. '' You're not leaving this house tonight. What did we agree on? It's a party. You promised. ''

The witch crossed her arms. '' Caroline... '' she whined.

'' Oh, look! There's Matt! ''

As if on cue, Donovan appeared out of nowhere, a big, goofy smile on his face, his hand stretched out to pull Bonnie into his arms. Accepting her defeat, she rolled her eyes - fondly - letting herself be persuaded. For now.

'' I'll leave anyway! '' She called over his shoulder, and he laughed.

Caroline waved her off by sticking her tongue out, then jumping into Stefan's arms.

A night just like any other.

Swaying gently in the rhythm of the music, holding Bonnie, Matt cocked his head to the side.

'' So... '' he said curiously. '' Wanna tell me why you're so eager to go? This is practically your party. ''

Bonnie wasn't sure how to answer. She simply didn't feel comfortable in the Boarding House tonight, celebrating life and death, drinking expensive wine. Even though she couldn't have been happier about being reunited with her friends, about being alive, loneliness lurked over her like a cloud, raining upon her the entire evening.

She needed a little time. That's all.

'' I'm just tired, I guess. '' She replied with a small shrug.

Her chin rested on his shoulder, and they slowed down, melting into the quiet melodies dancing around them. Her gaze burned through the crowd, searching, though she didn't want it to; she didn't want to search for him. She didn't want to find him.

But she did. He was already looking at her ( and Matt ), well, glaring, really, though his expression softened when he noticed that she was looking at him, too. He rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly and attempted a smile, but it looked forced.

Why? Bonnie couldn't help wanting to know. She smiled back, gently; her heart fluttered in her chest, a caged dove, longing for freedom. Damon looked strikingly handsome tonight - though, didn't he always - his hair dark and wild, eyes blue and deep, skin smooth and pale, mouth like a sin and white clothes on top.

That color really suited him.

Elena inched towards him, laughing, placing a hand on his cheek to turn his head in her direction. She succeeded, but his eyes were still on Bonnie; until finally his girlfriend pressed her lips into his.

Bonnie wanted to look away, yet she couldn't. Her throat felt dry, her bones heavy.

And she couldn't look away.

All of sudden, Caroline stepped in, blocking the view. She tapped Matt's shoulder lightly, making him look at her. The strangest expression was sitting solidly in her bright eyes. A nameless wonder.

'' Sorry, Matt, I'm stealing Bonnie away for the rest of this dance, '' she said with a smile.

Say what? Matt seemed amused, if not a little baffled, but he nodded, leaning in to kiss Bonnie's cheek.

'' Have fun. ''

'' Thanks... '' Bonnie replied, raising an eyebrow.

She felt like laughing when Caroline took Matt's place, putting one arm around her waist loosely. They have danced like this before, only years ago. When they were much younger and smaller. Practicing and messing around for their lessons.

Now, here, it seemed out of place, but Bonnie went along with it, because why the hell not? It reminded her of all the fun they had in their dancing classes. Though her cheeks burned - especially when, out of the corner of her eye, she caught Damon gaping - she didn't care.

She did care, however, about her friend's piercing gaze. She had been so busy thinking and looking around that she almost forgot to ask what the sudden rush to dance was about.

But, as it turned out, Caroline did all the asking.

'' Okay, what is going on? '' She inquired in a whisper. '' I thought it was coincidence before, but now... I just caught you staring at Damon. And he was staring back! You two have been at it the whole night. What's up? ''

That questioned knocked the breath out of Bonnie's lungs. '' What - what are you talking about? ''

'' Please, '' the vampire replied, almost rolling her eyes. '' I'm not blind. Are you jealous or something? Is this why you wanted to go home? ''

Bonnie swallowed the painful lump in her throat. '' Of course not, Caroline. This isn't about Damon or Elena. I just... don't feel well. ''

'' Is that why your eyes are glued to him? ''

'' Caroline, that's silly, '' she said firmly, attempting to locate some courage. '' Damon and I have may have bonded on the other side - or what was left of it - but that doesn't mean I'm in love with him. You of all people should know that. ''

'' Well, for the love of everything, I certainly hope so. Now, get that fabulous ass over to the liquor supply and get some down you. You look like you might need a drink or two. ''

With a light smack on the said fabulous ass from Miss Forbes herself, Bonnie was left on the floor, still dripping wet with loneliness, her umbrella standing a few feet away.

She wondered what he saw while looking at her and Caroline seconds before. Yin and yang, perhaps? Fair skin, a white dress, golden locks, mixed with dark skin, a black dress, hair of the hue of a crow's feather.

She wondered what he was thinking about, because his cheeks were aflame he looked distracted as Alaric walked over to him.

She guessed she'd never know.

A week later, she just came home with the groceries when her phone rang. Again.

She had no idea who wanted to talk to her so badly, because she couldn't answer. Her arms were full of bags with food and drinks for a girl's night later, her mobile buried deep in the pocket of her jeans.

When she set everything on the kitchen table, relived by the lack of pressure on her muscles, she finally did answer the call, in hurry, without bothering to check the name flashing on the screen.

'' Hello? ''

'' Whoa, did you just run a marathon? ''

The familiar voice froze and melted her. '' Oh, Damon, '' she laughed breathlessly, not knowing why. '' No, I was just shopping with Jeremy. ''

Her reply was greeted with a heavy silence. And at last with sarcasm. '' Sorry I interrupted, then. ''

A creased line appeared in between her brows. Seriously? Hadn't she told him already that her and Jeremy were not going to get back together?

'' You didn't interrupt. ''

'' Right. Anyway, '' he continued. '' I was just wondering if you're busy now? ''

It felt extremely good to hear his voice again. Directed to her, echoing only for her. Filling her up. He had been so busy with Elena lately that they didn't really have time to hang out like they used to.

And it hurt, though she'd never admit.

'' I'm not. Why? ''

'' I miss you... ''

Her stomach flipped.

'' Meet me at The Grill, now. ''

She did.

They sat in the corner of the bar, laughing and talking, and she could see everything in his eyes. All of his walls were down. Just like that. It was the most beautiful kind of nudity.

It was odd; but wonderful. Until Elena joined them.

Bonnie felt horribly guilty; there was no other way to describe it. Guilty. But she couldn't help it. Obviously, things have changed between her and Elena. And she really, really missed Damon too. At least an hour on their own would have been nice.

When the Gilbert beauty entered the pub with a light smile, Damon's jaw dropped a little due to surprise, and though he said nothing, his eyes turned apologetic as he looked over at Bonnie. He became very distant all of sudden.

Or maybe that was just her imagination.

One way or another, the nightmare was over a few glasses of Bourbon later.

Bonnie had informed Caroline of the events by a text, asking for a ride home. When she stepped out of the bar, the blonde was already waiting for her behind the wheel, eyebrows raised, bottom lip caught between her pearl white teeth.

'' So, how was it? '' She asked curiously as Bonnie hopped into her seat.

The dark haired girl kicked her shoes off wearily, not bothering to hide the fact that her night out basically sucked. Watching Damon and Elena together for almost two hours was too much to bear. '' Don't ask. ''

'' God, Bonnie, '' Caroline said impatiently, but gently. '' Just be honest with me. Do you feel something for him? ''

Again, the same question. The witch wasn't convinced she could say ' no ' anymore. She closed her eyes, leaning her head back on the seat. '' I don't know... ''

Caroline sighed. '' Well, that's the first step towards the truth. At least you're not denying it anymore. ''

Bonnie's eyes popped open and she raised her eyebrows disapprovingly. '' Caroline. ''

'' Just stating the obvious. ''

Two weeks later, young miss Forbes entered her friend's bedroom without knocking. She was too pissed off for that.

'' All right. Damon is insufferable - more than usually, that is - and you have been cooped up in here for three days, not answering my calls or texts. What is going on? ''

When treated with silence, she pulled the thick blanket off the Bennett girl brutally, dropped it on the floor and then crossed her arms.

'' Bonnie! ''

'' I don't want to talk about it. ''

Ah, there was the answer. Quiet, but it was there, all right. Rolling her eyes, Caroline walked over to the left side of the bed and crouched by it to look into the tired, hazel eyes she knew so well.

'' You look like hell, '' she said softly, sighing. '' Want to tell me what happened? ''

An hour later, drinking sweet tea and sitting in the puddles of sunlight by the closed window, both girls were silent. Bonnie had told Caroline everything. How her emotions finally got a hold of her; how when Damon approached her, she told him that she couldn't be there for him, because she was going to spend some time with Jeremy.

The first boy she ever loved, the first boy who ever loved her, the first who ever got to explore her wholly.

Of course, those details she did not include, but he probably knew.

Because he had looked like someone slapped him. And she dug further into the wounds, telling him that they got back together, and now that she had a boyfriend, things would have to change.

And Damon was furious. But he quickly masked it and said that it was okay. Because that gave him more free time to spend with Elena.

Elena, the love of his life.

Things quickly turned nasty; at the end she was screaming and crying, and he was shouting, too. It was horrible.

'' None of this makes sense, '' Caroline said finally, shaking her head. Her eyes were fixed on the wooden floor, her chin resting on her knees. She set her cup down, looked up at Bonnie intensely and pursed her lips. '' Just be honest with him. It can't be that bad, right? ''

Bonnie's stomach flipped at the thought. '' No way. It will make things even worse. Besides... there's nothing to be honest about. I just... got used to him being with me all the time, you know? Now it's difficult to get back to real life. But I'll be fine. I'll get over it. ''

'' Ugh! '' Caroline groaned loudly. '' Listening to you say that makes my ears bleed. Or maybe it's just that all the blood from my ass flowed to my head. Am I the only one feeling a little bit numb from sitting on that floor? ''

Bonnie sniffed, but cracked a smile. Having a friend like Caroline was a blessing; no matter how difficult to handle at times.

'' Stefan? Stefan, where are you? '' Annoyed, Caroline took a deep breath. The next sound coming out of her was rooted right at the bottom of her lungs, strong and loud, a wave crashing the silence. '' STEEEEEE - ''

'' Jesus Christ. Did I just hear a dog howl in agony? '' Damon said, stopping her mid sentence. Well, mid name.

She rolled her eyes and ignored him - then paused in a moment of brilliant enlightenment, turned to face him and grabbed his arm. Her sunshine kissed locks swirled with the swift movement of her body. She was just about to ask the asshole what was his deal and beat him up for treating his best friend like crap, but then decided against it. Her mouth closed magically.

'' Mmm, '' Damon sighed, delighted. '' You hear that? The beautiful sound of silence. '' He smirked at her, mocking and arrogant, looking around them as if to prove his point. '' You should close your mouth more often, barbie. ''

She smiled at him sweetly, narrowing her eyes, digging her sharp nails into his shoulder. He winced, but didn't pull away.

'' Cute. Is there a reason you're keeping me captive, or can I go back to enjoying my life? ''

Caroline took a deep breath. She was a vampire, she had murdered before, she probably will again. All the same. She prayed to God almighty, whether he existed or not, she prayed for patience and tolerance not to become a worse sinner and kill the man before her, too.

She remembered that she was doing this for Bonnie. Perhaps God would take this sacrifice into account if judging her one day.

'' Yes. Yes, there is, '' she replied coolly. '' I just wanted to ask if you've seen Bonnie. She's not answering her phone. ''

The strangest expression crossed Damon's handsome face. He frowned; she could actually see him swallow.

'' Nope. Anything else? ''

'' I'm worried about her, '' Caroline stated quietly. Then, as if struck by lightning, she slapped her forehead, a bright smile glowing on her face. '' Oh, right! I totally forgot. She must be with Jeremy. They have another date. ''

Not. Oh well. It was a white lie.

Damon returned her smile, but it was forced and bitter. '' That's great. ''

Caroline nodded eagerly, all her teeth showing in a grin. '' It is! They're perfect for each other. ''

'' Yup. ''

'' Yeah. '' A pause. '' He's such a good boyfriend. Did you know where he took her the last time? Oh, there's this exclusive restaurant, you should totally bring Elena to it. Or maybe you did already. It's where a lot of guys proposed to their girls, you know that one? Maybe he's thinking about doing it, too... oh my God! Could you imagine a clan of stubborn little Gilberts running around? His genes mixed with Bonnie's would - ''

Damon's eyes glowed dangerously as he narrowed them.

'' They're together. They're happy. I get it, '' he snapped. '' Anything else you need to add? ''

'' Well - ''

He raised one finger up. '' Oh, wait. ''

Another smile, just as a bitter, just as mocking. '' I don't care. ''

Huffing, Caroline rested the balls of her fists on her hips.

Interesting development indeed.

'' I'm telling you, he was reeking of jealousy! ''

Bonnie sighed, attempting to ignore the fluttering of these simple words, unwilling to let them plant themselves in her mind. Or heart. '' Caroline, I told you, that's impossible. Damon loves Elena. ''

'' Yeah, '' Caroline agreed. '' But... is he in love with her? ''

Looking up, Bonnie frowned. '' Of course he is. He has been for years. ''

'' Well, if you think about it, it's kind of unhealthy. Katherine started this whole cycle in his life. I mean, she's basically the reason for his psychotic side and misery. ''

The lines in Bonnie's forehead deepened as she processed Caroline's words warily. '' Where are you going with this? ''

Caroline shrugged innocently. '' I just think that the toxic cycle should have ended a long ago... maybe Damon just doesn't belong with the doppelgangers. ''

Shaking her head, Bonnie went back to folding her clothes. '' Caroline, I don't feel anything for him, okay? He's just a friend. Well... he was, at least. '' Her voice dropped to a whisper. '' He's still not talking to me. ''

'' Exactly my point. Look at you. You look like you haven't slept and eaten in days. He doesn't look any better, either. It's obvious you miss each other. ''

Bonnie raised an eyebrow.

'' Okay, seriously! '' Caroline exclaimed tiredly. '' I know I'm a bitch. But I stick with my opinion - which is that Damon and Elena are not a good combination, okay? And there is obviously something going on between you two. Something so strong that you're trying to run away from it. ''

Taking a step towards Bonnie, she took one of the short skirts splayed out on the couch and folded it slowly. '' But you can't... because just the fact that you're trying to run proves you're already caught. It's only a matter of admitting it to yourself. And I'm done watching you beat yourself up! ''

These words, however, Bonnie couldn't stop sinking deep into her system.

No matter how much she tried. No matter how much she wanted to.

The next day, there was another get-together. In Grill this time. They had the whole place to themselves, thanks to Matt, so they celebrated the end of the exams passionately. Spring break was on its way.

Caroline and Bonnie took a seat as far away from their crew as possible. The golden blonde shrugged her jacket off awkwardly, her eyes searching, her fists ready to punch. She was obviously ready to attack. She was obviously worried.

'' It's okay, '' Bonnie said reassuringly, smiling weakly.

It was anything but okay.

'' I know you want to talk to Stefan. Go. ''

Caroline shook her head firmly.

Tired, oh so tired, Bonnie rested her head on the table, letting her eyes fall close. This pain and yearning inside her burned, cutting holes in her flesh. She needed to let some of the smoke out. She wasn't able to keep it in any longer. What was there to lose?

Heaving a sigh, she let it go.

'' I love him... ''

The words sounded miserable. Barely a whisper in the noise.

Caroline choked on her drink. '' You LOVE - ''

'' Shhh! '' Bonnie hissed, lifting her head abruptly.

It was the first time she admitted it, fully. And out loud. Tears pooled in her eyes, and she put her head back on the table, hiding. Damon still wouldn't talk to her. And why would he? Things went back to how they were before. He was happy and in love, and Bonnie Bennett didn't mean anything to him.

She felt like she was going to choke. It's been almost a month. Their only real interaction happened a week ago, when she was in trouble. He caught her before she hit the ground. He carried her home. He fed her his blood. He stroked her cheek and bottom lip and whispered soothing things, thinking she was unconscious, until she actually fell asleep.

When she woke up, he was gone. When she saw him after, he still wouldn't say a word to her.

'' I need some air, '' Bonnie stated, wiping her cheeks before sitting up straight again. Concern twinkled in Caroline's eyes.

'' Do you want me to come with you? ''

'' No, it's fine. I'll be back in a minute. ''

'' Promise? ''

'' Promise. ''

Unnoticed, it seemed, Bonnie went out and immersed in the cool, night air. It was a relief to have a break, breathe outside, completely on her own. She couldn't help herself; she fished Caroline's keys out of her pocket ( her task tonight was to keep them safe ) and got into her car.

Just to sit down and think. Not to run away. She promised, didn't she?

Besides, she couldn't, wouldn't run away. She just had to accept the facts and learn to live with them. But how, she had no idea. She had already forgotten what it meant to sleep.

She was sitting in the back of the vehicle, because there was more space to get comfortable. And before she knew it, the door on the left side opened. She only had the time to get a glimpse of Damon's blue eyes before she felt his hands on her waist, pulling her towards him slowly. She knew that she was supposed to say something, anything, however, she had no idea what.

Her mind wasn't even able to process what was happening. Upon seeing him, first came the surprise, the stutter in her heart, the nervousness - then the confusion, then the fire. Her stomach lurched with a thrill, her heart thundered in her ears. He had practically pulled her onto his lap.

And then he kissed her.

Now. Bonnie realized that they were in Caroline's car, right outside of The Grill. And anyone could have came out and caught them. And Damon was still with Elena.

She kissed him back, though. It was impossible not to. So she moved her lips against his own, frantically, feeding her starving heart. It was all teeth and tongues, her hands running through his soft hair, his roaming her waist and legs, pulling her closer and closer, if that was even possible.

And it was heaven. She was trembling in his arms, because even the most chaste touches were a rush, as was his reaction. She could feel his desire. His love.

When he stopped the kiss, breathing hot air onto her lips heavily, she kept her eyes closed, in fear, in confusion.

'' Come back inside? '' He asked softly. His voice sounded different. Passionate.

It gave her chills.

Her lids lifted gradually, inch by inch, second by second.

The way he looked at her. She could have died.

He looked at her that way for a long time; she just couldn't put a name on it. Now it was clear.

'' But... I thought - how - ''

He caught her bottom lip in between his teeth gently and pulled on it. Desire pulsed through her.

'' I might have been eavesdropping, '' he whispered.

The whole world spun. Puzzle pieces changed their places, shifting.

'' We have to talk to Elena. ''

His suggestion surprised her, soothing the previous burns.

'' Now? ''

'' Right now. ''

She has suddenly felt even more guilty. And excited. And yet again, nervous. It was a mixture of emotions.

'' And, oh, '' he added casually, his eyes sparkling, his fingers pressing into her cheeks. '' I'm an idiot. I should have said it earlier, but... I love, you too. ''

The last three words didn't sound so casual. That time, she was the one to kiss him, arms around his neck, nose bumping into his. Then he groaned.

'' Wait, wait, I can't talk to Elena like this. ''

He leaned back on the seat, taking a deep breath. His cheeks were red. His hair disheveled. He looked like a man in love, in lust. He smelled like home. He felt like home.

Bonnie watched his chest rise and fall as he inhaled. She absolutely understood what he meant. He couldn't walk into The Grill with a bulge in his jeans, could he?

A thought suddenly hit her, making her back straighten in alarm. '' Oh God, Caroline - ''

'' Don't worry, she's our guard. ''

His fingers rubbed her hips lightly and she relaxed, feeling a tide of affectionate gratefulness for Caroline rush through her. Not for the first time.

And then Damon shook his head, groaning again. '' Nope. Not working. ''

She started laughing, and he frowned.

'' What? ''

'' Nothing, '' she assured him. She pressed another kiss into his lips, a tender one. He was smiling against her mouth, and really, that night was just a beginning. Of everything.