Author's Notes: Usual disclaimer on ownership. I first posted this on 4chan's RWBY General.
We aren't together, but we study together.
Our teacher paired us up in our Grimm behavioral class because she thought you'd be a calming influence on me. We shared our desk and book and studied as an unstoppable team. I read aloud, making animal noises and you calmly took notes. The teacher wasn't very impressed with us, with me really, but it was a blast. I learned a lot from you and while I know you probably didn't learn a lot from me, you enjoyed it too.
We were split up after that, but kept finding our way back to each other. Reading in the library until I fell asleep or got us kicked out or eating together in the cafeteria and losing our trains of thought and talking about anything but schoolwork until the bell rang and we made our way back to class side by side. In class it's hard for me to sit still and stay silent so I whispered to you while our teacher's back was turned, but the words came too fast and many and loud and she put us on opposite sides of the class from one another. At the end of the day I yelled some joke across the class to you and got detention, but it was worth it.
On the weekends we met at a tea house you knew. You brought our book and we sat next to each other, pressed side by side, drinking tea and ignoring it completely. I didn't know why I was so nervous and I didn't know why you blushed when I rested my head on your shoulder. I was disappointed and frustrated when my dad came to pick me up. I'd never been disappointed to be distracted from studying before, and never so happy than when we scheduled another session.
I passed that class because of you, and with better marks than any of my other classes. You said it was all me, that I had it in me the entire time, but I know it was you and I'll always remember it. It was the best class of my life.
We aren't together, but we spend time together.
It started with a movie. A kung fu movie you wanted to see was playing and you asked if I wanted to go. I said yes immediately and felt the butterflies in my stomach flutter and fly. It wasn't a date, just going as friends, but I still dressed up nice and met you at the theater. You bought me popcorn. And nachos. And gummy bears. And chocolate. And a soda. And a refill on the soda and popcorn when I finished them off before the trailers were over.
I'm a nervous eater.
We sat side by side in the dark. I was rigid and stared straight forward. I wanted to say something, but couldn't because of the film playing in front of us. Your arm brushed mine on the armrest and I jerked away in surprise. "Sorry," I said, humiliated. You told me it was okay and that we could share the armrest. I nervously returned my arm and felt yours beside me. You were warm. I was glad for the darkness that hid the flush in my face.
We spent the weekends and summers at each others houses until we became family. I could walk through your door without knocking and you could sit at my family's table without being asked. Our families learned our favorite foods and birthdays and celebrated triumphs and holidays together. You and I explored the woods together and skinny dipped in the quiet pond behind your house. I don't know if you saw me then. You promised you wouldn't look while we were out of the water, but I promised that too and I know I lied.
When I ran away from home it was your home where I found refuge. Your parents called mine and you comforted me while waiting for my dad to pick me up.
You held me when I was sad, stood by me when I was afraid, and was simply with me when times were good. You were my partner, my comrade, my friend, and if I live to be a thousand I will always be there for you and I know you will be there for me.
We aren't together, but we made love together.
It was a quiet, hot afternoon in the last days of summer. We lay in your bed, window open, hoping for a breeze and listening to the cicadas drone relentlessly on. The ceiling fan slowly rotated above us, doing little to cool us. I wore shorts and a tank top, drenched in sweat, and you were on your stomach beside me in pair of shorts.
I felt sweat trickle down my forehead and I sighed a long groan of frustration and heard you chuckle beside me. You were as miserably hot as I was, but were smiling at me. I smiled back and felt you shift and press your lips to mine.
It was not the first kiss we shared, a quick and furtive brush behind a stairwell at school. We had kissed often, telling ourselves it was friendly or even familial, but this was different. Our tongues intertwined and I held your face to mine. Your hands caressed my body and moved under my shirt.
No words were spoken. I heard a needful groan and still don't know if it was you or me or the two of us together. You awkwardly undressed me and stared at my body beneath you. I felt a sudden shyness and tried to cover myself but you took my hands in yours and kissed me again and it was all forgotten. You explored me with your hands and lips and tongue and I, you in awkward, hurried movements, afraid your parents would arrive home and catch us or that we would come to our senses and stop ourselves.
It felt like a rushed eternity and when we were done we lay naked together, hotter and sweatier than before, staring at each other. I laughed and you laughed for a long, long time, longer than the event that preceded it. Eventually your parents arrived home and we hurriedly dressed.
A week later you dyed a strand of your hair the same bright pink as your eyes.
I started wearing my heart on my chest.
We never talked about it.
We aren't together.
And I don't know why.
I don't know why you chose her over me.
Do you really not think of me as I think of you? Do you know know how I feel? Can you spend so much time with someone and not know them? Am I just a friend or a sister to you?
Sometimes I wonder how much I can bear.
We aren't together. We have never been together
It kills me inside.
But then I think of us. The nights we spent studying, the jokes we shared, the pain we withstood, a single beautiful moment and I think...
We are together. We have always been together.
And that's enough.