Title: Birth-kun

Pairings: Goto/Satonaka

Warnings: A little out of character. Okay, quite out of character. Also, implied sex, although nothing too serious :D

I don't own Kamen Rider.

Shintaro Goto was in a mess by the time Date had managed to get him to calm down. He'd trudged out the lab's door, with Maki staring at him trying to figure out just what the hell happened. Tears of anger, embarrassment and sadness still stained his cheeks. His uniform was very crumpled, what with Satonaka kicking him in the chest (ouch) and his rolling all over the floor. Under his breath he kept muttering a mixture of "...why?" and "Birth-kun...", his mind still latched onto the silver-green transformation device. Date pulled Goto out of the lab, giving an awkward smile to Maki, who merely raised his eyebrow and continued with his work.

Needless to say, it was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to see Goto in this state.

Date kept patting his back while getting him to walk, saying that it was okay and that he was sure that Goto would get the chance to use 'Birth-kun' again. Goto was too emotionally shattered to make a big deal out of it, but he could have sworn he heard Date mutter, "at least mine didn't get stolen..."

As the (former) twin Birth users walked down the corridor from the lab leading to the elevator, Goto suddenly quickened his pace, heading towards his quarters. Date only noticed this once he realised that there was no longer a surface his hand could pat. "Oi, Goto-chan!" Date couldn't catch up fast enough. Goto made a sharp turn and locked himself inside, the door slamming loudly.

Date just stood there, dumbfounded. After a few seconds of waiting he heard whimpers and sobs coming from inside. Date knocked on the door. "Oi, Goto-chan! You okay?" No response. Just more whimpers and sobs. "Man, what am I supposed to do now?" Date sighed, scratching his head. He decided the best course of action was to talk to Kougami Foundation's eccentric CEO.

"Satonaka-kun. I trust your training of the Birth users went well?" Kougami stood up upon seeing his secretary enter the office. "Yes, sir. It went very well." She smirked evilly, holding up the Birth Driver in full view of Kougami. Kougami pointed a finger at Satonaka. "SUBARASHII! You took the driver from Date-kun?" Satonaka nonchalantly shook her head. "Goto." Upon hearing this, Kougami started, "SUBARA-", but then he realised what he just heard. "...shii...? You took it from Goto-kun?" Satonaka sat down on the couch and started messing around with her phone. "Mmm-hmm."

Kougami frowned. "Satonaka-kun. Do you know how much Goto-kun treasures his Birth Driver? If he lets it be taken away from him, the results would be..." He breathed in. "Unimaginable." Satonaka chuckled. "I like it when he's sad. He's cute when he does that." And as sadistic as that sounded, it was the truth to her. Every single time she looked at the Rider, that same emotionless face would look back at her. It would be nice for him to show some emotion once in a while.

Kougami didn't seem to be listening to her, but nevertheless he responded with a thoughtful expression, and sat back down. "Hmm. Subarashii," he said softly. He went back to writing down his new cake recipe.

All was peaceful in the office... for about another twelve seconds. Suddenly, Akira Date barged into the office, his legs struggling to stabilize himself from the run he had just broken out into. Satonaka glanced at him, giving him a polite nod, before going back to whatever she was doing. Kougami stood up again, this time extending his arms in a greeting. "Ah, Date-kun-" he started, but Date cut him off. "President-" he was speaking more formally than usual. "We have a situation."

Kougami looked at Satonaka, who grinned, obviously having more than a few ideas about what that 'situation' was. Kougami, despite being smart enough to figure out the problem by himself, still asked, "What situation?" and sat back down with another frown. Date glanced over at both of them before starting, "It's Goto-chan. He's locked himself in his quarters. He seems... very miserable."

Kougami nodded slowly with understanding he already had. "Satonaka-kun?" Satonaka looked up, herself resisting the urge to laugh loudly. "Yes?" She finally managed to respond. "Would you settle this problem? As you can see, I am quite... busy." Kougami said, pointing to his cake recipe." Satonaka stood up with a smile. "Okay." She picked up the Birth Driver from the couch and made her way out.

Date sat down in her place. "Ehh... how is she going to settle this?" Kougami merely shrugged and muttered, "...Subarashii."

Satonaka walked down the corridor, and stopped at Goto's door. She knocked, first softly, then very loudly. "Goto-san?" She could hear sniffles and the occasional cough, although it was nothing compared to what Date had heard earlier. "Goto-san? I have your beloved Birth-kun here~" The sniffling stopped. She could hear a faint "...Really?" coming from inside. "Yes~" She responded.

She heard the door slowly unlocking, turning open a small space to reveal a portion of Goto's tear-stained face. She waved the Birth Driver at him, and the door was opened just enough for Goto to reach the Birth Driver with his hands. He snatched it away from her hands and shut the door again, however this time forgetting to lock the door. The crying started again, although this time he was crying tears of joy and relief.

Satonaka noticed that the door was no longer locked. She wasn't about to let up this chance. She slowly opened the door to reveal a very happy Goto curled up against the wall, with his arms clutching the Birth Driver tightly and his face buried in it. She had to admit that he looked VERY cute.

Closing the door, she sat down on the floor to Goto's right. She then turned to put her right arm around Goto's curled up body. "Goto-san~" She called him seductively. The crying abruptly stopped, his emotions of happiness and delight replaced by those of shock and arousal. The Birth Driver would have to wait, Satonaka thought.

She coaxed his arms away from the Birth Driver (not without some fierce resistance at first) and set it on the ground beside them. Goto felt his face burn up. "W-What?" He responded, still a little suspicious of her after the whole incident. Satonaka gave him a very sad look, and softly drawled, "Sorry~", her hand going up to his face and feeling his cheeks before pulling his head to hers for a kiss. Goto already felt his blood circulation getting faster. Satonaka rested her head on Goto's right shoulder, her silky hair settling down- and Goto would be damned if it didn't smell good.

By now, Goto was a little freaked out... not to mention turned on. "A-Ah... i-it's okay, you know- as long a-as you don't do it again-" Goto stammered. Satonaka grinned, and pulled down Goto's legs from his curled up position. After that was done, she slowly- excruciatingly slowly- dragged her hand across his legs, aiming for the spot that Satonaka would normally only focus at if she wanted to kick it.

Oh. Oh no. Oh god no.

Oh god yes.

Satonaka slowly undid his zipper, producing a satisfying sound which only served to make Goto more nervous.

"DATE-KUN!" Kougami stood up for a third time, this time with much more energy. This sudden movement jolted the current Birth Prototype user from his sleep. "What?" he grumbled with a yawn. Kougami sat back down. "Let's go check on Satonaka-kun. She seems to be taking a long time." Date wondered what he meant by 'a long time' before glancing at the clock which read: 8:02 P.M. Satonaka left at around 5PM. It didn't take long for Date to put two and two together. He nodded in agreement, and dashed out the door.

Kougami stood up yet again and paced quickly after Date. The chair fell to the floor after him.

Date was, of course, the first one to arrive at Goto's door, still closed. Kougami, who arrived soon after, was quick to point out that his door was no longer locked.

Date knocked on the door. "Goto-chan? GOTO-CHAN?" No response. Date suddenly felt fearful for his partner. For all he knew Satonaka could have tied him to his own bed and gagged him. "Goto-chan, if you don't open the door I'll open it myself!" Still nothing. Kougami just stood there, hands behind his back. Date silently counted to three, then turned the doorknob and pushed in with his eyes closed, preparing for a horrible scene.

What he saw shocked him, to say the least.

He saw the Goto and Satonaka on the former's single bed. Their clothes were on the floor, so Date could only assume that they were naked- with only a thin bedsheet covering everything up to their necks. The two were snoring contentendly in their sleep, with Satonaka's face buried in Goto's neck.

Oh, and not to mention the Birth Driver sitting on the floor.

Kougami soon followed into the room. When he saw how the... 'situation' was being handled, he could only let out a loud "SUBARASHII!" This, of course, woke up both of them. Their reactions were very different. Satonaka stuck a hand out of the sheets, giving a thumbs up to Kougami while smirking. Goto could only pull up the bedsheets so much to at least cover half of his face, the colour of which was comparable to Ankh's core medals.

A/N: Oh god. I'm so sorry. I couldn't resist. My first fanfic and I'm already entering dangerous territory. Please kill me.