A/N: Yes, I know I have a problem. But Bellarke is running round my mind and I can't stop. And you know I have a problem because I don't want to.

This was meant to be a short one-shot, but this has actually turned out to be longer than a lot of my stories about these two. I hope you enjoy it.


DISCLAIMER: I do NOT own The 100 or any of the characters; I also don't own any of the quotes used


Touch


"We are not people who touch each other carelessly; every point of contact between us feels important, a rush of energy and relief."

Veronica Roth, Allegiant


There are five senses, but it's only when around Bellamy that Clarke begins to appreciate how strong touch is.

If she thinks about it, it started when she hugged him. When she leapt into his arms without thought or fear, because she knew that he would never reject her. In that moment they weren't careful with each like they usually were; in that moment they were free.

Yet if she's honest with herself, it had started even earlier than that. When she had walked out of the drop ship after the storm and Bellamy had taken the object he had stabbed Lincoln with out of her hand. Their hands, for a brief moment in time, touched. In that brief moment there was electricity, a connection between the two of them.

And even before then, when she had fallen into the trap the Grounders had made when she had been trying to rescue Jasper; when Bellamy reached down and grabbed hold of her. How she had looked up and he had looked down, how their eyes had met in a second.

The first time they touched, he had saved her life.

That's when it began.


It happens the first night they return to camp after rescuing their people from Mount Weather. The general mood is high, especially when parents and children have reunited (there are only a few families that are lucky enough to do so), but Clarke is exhausted. By the look on Bellamy's face she can tell he feels the same way.

"Do you feel bad?" she had asked him as they made their way back to the camp.

"No," he had answered bluntly. At the look on her face he added, "They were trying to hurt our people. We had to stop them. And the Grounders have suffered for years."

"At least that explains about the Reapers," Clarke had pointed out. "I feel bad about those Reapers that managed to survive the explosion. They're going go through a hell of a withdrawal."

She saw Bellamy look back at Octavia, who was walking with a number of Grounders, including Lincoln. He seemed to be doing well, though he looked a little grey. Clarke had almost believed that she would never see Grounders and her people co-existing together; but not only were they co-existing, they were actually taking an interest in each other. Some things united people, and battling a common enemy was one of them.

Back at Camp Jaha, the adults were thrilled to see them. Abby clutched Clarke to her and berated her for running off, but she is so happy to see her that she has barely let her out of her sight. Clarke manages to slip away though and is currently walking down the halls of the Ark. Abby has mentioned that the children that don't have any rooms can make do with some areas of the Ark that haven't been taken yet. "There may have to be some doubling up," Abby had warned. "We'll start thinking of building in the morning." Clarke knows this doesn't apply to her; she'll be sharing with her mom.

To Clarke's surprise, there are some mattresses and blankets (she supposes that it helps bringing the Ark to the ground in regards to supplies) in these rooms already. She pauses in a small one that looks particularly cosy. It's going to be winter soon, but the good thing about sticking in the Ark is that it was built to protect people from space, which is pretty cold. Right now Clarke is actually warm.

Before she knows what she's doing she has settled on the mattress, pulling a few of the folded blankets across her.

It feels like only a second has passed before she feels movement. She jerks up, her eyes blinking quickly.

"Hey, relax." She recognises the voice and automatically settles, even though doing the opposite of what Bellamy Blake wants is highly entertaining.

"What are you doing here?"

"I got worried when I couldn't find you. We created the buddy system for a reason." It's a joke and despite the lameness Clarke gives a little laugh. "You okay?"

She nods. "Just tired. What's going on out there?"

She feels, rather than sees, Bellamy settle on the mattress. "A party. The Grounders cleared off a little while ago, but we left on good terms. I think we might have successfully made a truce."

"And you're happy with that? You, Bellamy lets-kill-Grounders Blake?"

He chuckles. "I know. But I think I've had enough murder and death to last a lifetime."

She pauses for a moment. "I hope this is the end, but I have a bad feeling we'll be fighting until we die."

The mood grows sombre for a moment. She feels Bellamy move closer to her. "Well, we've made it this far."

Clarke tries to smile. "As long as we fight together, we can win." She had meant fighting with the Grounders, but the way it comes out it sounds like she means her and Bellamy. For some stupid reason she feels her face heat up and is glad of the darkness. "You don't want to join the party?"

She hears him sigh. "I'll party when I'm not exhausted." She feels him shift his weight on the mattress, and she's aware that they are now lying side by side. "Is it okay that I'm here?"

For a moment she is touched that he asked. She moves her body down, pulling a blanket up to her chin. "Of course it is." And she means it. After all they've been through, she doesn't feel awkward around Bellamy.

The next thing she knows it is brighter in the room, and even though there are no windows she can tell it's morning. She rubs her eyes and moves her head to the right, only to meet a back of black material. Bellamy. She freezes, uncertain of what to do. She doesn't remember even nudging against him in the middle of the night. Come to think of it, it's been a while since she's slept as well as that.

She gets up and quietly moves outside the room so she doesn't disturb him. The last thing she wants is the morning after conversation when they didn't actually have anything the night before. She swings round the corner and smacks straight into her mother.

"Clarke!" Abby gives a little sigh of relief. "I've been looking for you everywhere. I had thought you were going to be in my room when you went to sleep."

She has no quick answer for this. "I didn't know where you slept," she admits. "I was tired, and I just ended up talking with one of my friends and I-" She gives a little shrug. "Y'know."

Abby smiles. "You were tired," she repeats. "You've done a lot these past few days. From what I gather with the other kids, it wasn't easy."

Clarke doesn't have to close her eyes to see the flames leaps through the rooms; the people from Mount Weather screaming as their skin began to burn; the desperate race through the caves before jumping into the water, using the same escape route Anya had done before.

Back in the present Abby turns slightly. "How about we have breakfast and we talk?"

That is the absolute last thing Clarke wants to do. Not because she's avoiding her mother – now that they have the kids back and are on good terms with the Grounders, she thinks it's about time she worked on her relationship with her mom – but because she doesn't want to relive what happened. If anything she wants to forget.

But before she can formulate an answer she hears footsteps. A feeling of embarrassing horror comes over her and she glances round quickly, but there is no stopping Bellamy from appearing from the room she just vacated – the room her mother saw her vacate.

Bellamy barely pauses – indeed, he doesn't show any surprise at seeing the two Griffin women outside. "Hey," he greets. His eyes linger over Clarke for a moment. "Thanks for last night Clarke. That was exactly what I needed." He walks right past the two of them. Clarke sees her mother glance in shock at Bellamy before jerking her head back to Clarke; it's then she misses Bellamy turning his head, sending Clarke a pleased smirk.

She glowers after him. Bastard.


Even though they don't plan to, Bellamy and Clarke immediately set about organising the camp. What remains of the children set to the daily tasks of collecting water and food, organising shelter, taking turns guarding, easily and without a fuss. The adults, despite themselves, are impressed, she can tell. Clarke also makes sure Finn is without a gun, and Raven stays with him most of the time. His eyes still have a dazed look in them, but being with Raven reminds him of who he was before. Clarke thinks that's a good sign. Earth has changed Finn Collins, and not for the better.

Jaha and Kane finally return to the camp. The Grounders had kept them during the quest to Mount Weather, worried that the "Sky People" would betray them. Now that they had proved themselves, they allowed Jaha and Kane to return. They are bloody and bruised but the adults greet them enthusiastically. Clarke warmly welcomes Jaha, but she notices Bellamy is absent. Excusing herself she leaves the crowd, finding him in their spot i.e. the place where Raven helped them escape to find Finn.

He is sitting on the floor, gazing out into the woods. "You miss it?" he asks.

She sits next to him. "Miss what?"

"Our time on the Ark? Do you miss the life you had before?"

The question throws her off-guard. "I miss the first seventeen years," she admits. "I had a pretty good life up there. I had Wells, I worked with my mom, and my dad..." She trails off. Of all the people in the world she wishes was here, it's her dad hands down. If he was here she would feel safe. She would know everything was going to be okay, because that's what her dad did.

"I don't." Bellamy's voice is muted. "I don't miss being up on the Ark at all. I know things have been hard down here, and I know we've lost people. But I would rather be down here than back on the Ark." He glances over at Clarke. "Down here we've lived. We've done hard things, yeah, and it's not been easy. I'm sure that a mental health specialist would have a field day with us. But I think its better being down on the ground than up in the sky living a life of waiting."

Clarke thinks for a few moments. "You're right," she says quietly. She sighs, running a hand through her blonde hair. "I had such dreams of Earth. I thought it would be beautiful – and it is. But I never thought that we would have all the fighting. I thought we would do better than our ancestors did."

Bellamy looks at her for the first time. There's a little smile on his face; Clarke can't quite work out whether it's happy or sarcastic or even sad. Bellamy's never been the easiest to work out. "A lot of things can change, but not people."

They aren't sitting particularly close, and Clarke bridges the gap between them. Her arm stretches over and she places it on his.

Her hand, almost immediately, begins to burn. She feels electricity, a strike of lightning, fizzle through her body.

"You have," she says gently. "I remember what you were like when we first came here: self-righteous, arrogant, argumentative-"

"Me?" Bellamy bursts out laughing. "You were the one who challenged everyone-"

"Challenged you, you mean?"

"See, you're doing it right now."

"Would you let me give you a compliment, you ass?" Bellamy purses his lips together and attempts to keep a straight face, but Clarke can tell his eyes are dancing. "You're different. You saved that girl when you were desperate to find the rest of us. Before you would have left her without a thought."

Bellamy lowers his eyes. "Being a leader...it isn't a choice, is it?" At Clarke's shake of the head he continues. "I wanted to be the one in charge for once. On the Ark it was pretty much a class system; there was no way I would ever have gotten any power. You know that's true," he says when Clarke opens her mouth to argue. "I wanted to have the power for a change.

"But then I realised that I had to make decisions that affected everyone. I could make life hell for people, and that – that scared me. I realised I had to do what was best for everyone, not just myself."

Clarke would later wonder if it happened then: the moment that Bellamy admitted that he had tried to protect everyone, when his face seemed to lighten, when he took responsibility for his actions. If she fell in love with him in that moment.

"You're not the same boy that shot Jaha." Bellamy glances at her and she sees she hit the nail on the head. "Jaha forgave you; and no matter what anyone says, you've saved so many lives, including mine."

Bellamy gives her a tiny smile, but it's one that is truly bright. His eyes lower to the ground and Clarke realises that she is still holding onto his arm. Their eyes rise at the same time and connect in the middle.

Clarke stands a little too quickly. "C'mon," she says, pulling him up. Her smile feels a little too forced, and yet at the same time not forced enough. "We've got kids to look after."


"For God's sake Clarke," Bellamy mutters. Clarke doesn't even turn round as Bellamy attempts to pull the covers back over. "You're hogging them."

Clarke curls herself up, gripping the sheets right to her. "I'm cold Bellamy."

"Well so am I." He tries to pull them closer. "I'm going to go find those wolves the Grounders told us about and kill an entire pack of them. With their skins we'll be warm."

"That's a good idea," murmurs Clarke. "But what are we going to do until then?"

Bellamy lies flat on his back and sighs. "I suppose we could always share body heat."

Clarke turns her head slowly. She can still see his profile outlined in the darkness. "Meaning?"

He sighs. "How you and Finn had sex is a mystery to me."

She sits up. "What did you say?"

"As if everyone doesn't know." He turns his head and reaches his arm out. "Come here."

She feels her face do something – freeze, she thinks, or drops. "Excuse me?"

"Oh for fuck's sake." Bellamy's arm moves round her and pulls her across no man's land i.e. the space that Bellamy and Clarke have left between the two of them. She feels his arm wrap round her shoulders, turning her so her cheek lands against her chest.

She feels the spark light in her body.

"If we share body heat we'll get warm," Bellamy says. Clarke isn't sure if she's imagining it, but his voice sounds restrained. "Then we'll be able to keep the covers over both of us." He lifts the blankets up and puts it over their heads.

Clarke's mind scrabbles for something to say. "I suppose that's something," she murmurs, and winces; what does that even mean?

The silence falls over them, only echoed by the noises outside the room. Camp is never really quiet, even at night. Bellamy's arm is still securely round her body. She is conscious of every little movement that Bellamy makes; it feels like she isn't even breathing.

How she manages to fall asleep with her cheek on his chest, his arm round her, is amazing.


The Grounders invite them to a party. "It's not a party," Lincoln explains. He is sitting down, having a drink of water while Octavia is rubbing his back. She had explained that it helped sometimes when he got the craving for the drug that the Mountain Men had him on. Bellamy had gone a little pale when he had heard that.

"It's more like a festival," he says. "A welcome to winter, in the hope that because of this it will be an easy one."

"Winter," Clarke says, wincing at the word.

Lincoln eyes her. "That's one thing you can't avoid," he says plainly. "Unless you want to begin walking south. If it makes you feel better, your space ship seems well equipped to get you through it. Food will be the difficult thing. That's why it's a good thing for you to go to the festival. Making these links might lead to getting help if you need it."

Bellamy and Clarke meet each other's gazes. They are the only leaders present, though the council would argue that they weren't leaders at all. Lincoln showed that he held little regard for the adults. "Besides, I've seen you two fight for your people." He had eyed them. "We hold courage and loyalty highly."

"Okay," says Bellamy. "We'll go to the festival. Anything we need to bring?"

"How about some of that moonshine drink?" Lincoln says, brightening considerably.

Octavia gives him a whack on the head. "You don't need to get addicted to anything else," she says sternly.

Bellamy gives a little chuckle, eyeing Lincoln, before moving away.

All in all, the festival isn't that bad. It is exactly like a party, with food offered and dancing. The Grounders love the moonshine, and quickly become tipsy after only one cup. Clarke and Bellamy relax, knowing that if anything happens it's doubtful the Grounders will have the upper hand.

"It seems okay," Clarke says. "I think working together has finally solidified the alliance."

Bellamy shrugs. "I guess so." He looks round the crowd of kids. "No adults here," he comments.

Clarke shakes her head.

"I'm surprised they even let us out," he says. "You're mom help out with that?"

"Hardly," says Clarke. She remembers the argument she had with her mother about going. Kane had thrown his two cent in, saying that it would be foolish to leave the safety of the camp. Jaha was the voice of reason in the end. He said that the kids had managed this far, and that it was important to keep peace with the Grounders. He told Clarke to make sure they were back before midnight (he even gave her his watch, which after everything still worked) and she had hurried away before her mom and Kane could call out objections again.

As the evening wears on, the dancing begins. The Grounders play some kind of music, with drums and something that looks very similar to a guitar. Jasper and Monty lead in some type of war type dance, and Bellamy kills himself laughing. Jasper sees him and Clarke on the sidelines. "C'mon," he calls.

The smile falls off Bellamy's face. "No way," he says.

Clarke, who has had some moonshine herself, laughs at the expression on his face. "Can't ruin that reputation, can we Blake?"

He glowers at her. "I don't see you dancing princess."

"You're just scared your sister can outdo you." She and Bellamy look over to Octavia, who is being thrown up in the air by Lincoln. She is screeching, responsible for a good half of the noise there. Lincoln looks the happiest he's been in a while though, which is something.

Bellamy is about to speak but suddenly Clarke is grabbed by a Grounder and dragged into the crowd of people. Without thinking she clings to Bellamy and pulls him with her. The two of them are in the thick of the dancing. There doesn't seem to be any sort of standard; every person is doing their own thing.

Clarke grabs hold of Bellamy. He looks at her and they aren't two leaders anymore; for a few minutes they allow themselves to be children, to be friends, perhaps even something more.

So they dance.

And when they dance together, it's so easy for them to touch each other. It's so effortless for Bellamy to take hold of Clarke's hand, so easy for her own to brush hers on his hip. And because there are no steps it's so easy to move closer, to brush against his chest, to lean closer, to smell him and feel the warmth from his body.

By the time the party/festival is over and they have to get back to camp (both Grounders and children groan at this) Bellamy and Clarke are grinning. It isn't just because of the moonshine either.


They only talk about the nightmares once. Sharing a bed means that they can't hide things from one another. Not just the physical things, like the scars on their body or the way their faces relaxed when they slept; the emotional things too. Like how Clarke cries sometimes when it all becomes too much. Bellamy pretends not to notice and she thanks God that Bellamy Blake has some form of tact.

She never makes a noise. Sometimes she sniffs, but most of the time she just lets the tears fall. When she does she always feels Bellamy's arm tighten round her. He strokes her hair sometimes too. It's always a comforting feeling when he does that, and it usually manages to sooth Clarke to sleep.

The nightmares are the worst though.

Clarke has lost track of them all. She dreams that Dax is coming towards her with the gun; dreams that Charlotte is standing at that damn cliff again and she can't get her to move; that the Grounders are attacking the wall and she sees Finn and Bellamy racing into battle; that she is being hung upside down by the psycho doctor at Mount Weather; fighting the Reapers as she and her people are preparing to jump down into the water.

Earth really has screwed her up.

But it's not entirely because of Earth. She dreams of her father too. It's more the memory of him being floated, the smile he gave her before he was killed. In her dream she fights more, struggles and screams to stop them. Nobody takes notice though, and her father just smiles before he is shot into space.

Clarke wakes up at that moment, her body tense like she's been shocked. Tiredly she sits up. She had been leaning against Bellamy (they sleep that way now. The Grounders have shown them how to skin animals properly, and after a few bad attempts some of the people – kids and adults – are quite good. They have a wolf fur across the door to keep drafts from entering the room. They have more blankets over their bed, and Bellamy has managed to rig one of the covers from the ceiling which comes over the bed. Sometimes Clarke even says she's hot. She never moves away from Bellamy though) and she knows he's awake.

There is a moment's pause before she feels his hand on her back. She has a shirt on, but she only puts on a thin shirt during the night (she's is continuingly thanking God or whatever's up there for the fact all the things in the Ark came down with it – including more clothes) and she can feel the warmth of his hand. It warms, spreading across her back, soothing her.

"You okay?" he asks. His voice is loud in the room.

"Yeah," she says. Stifling a yawn she falls back down, moving her head so her neck is under his arm. "Sorry."

She sees Bellamy shake his head. "It's okay," he says. "I have them too."

As soon as he says that Clarke feels relief. Her chest loosens. For the first time she feels like talking about them. "I saw my dad dying again," she says. She can't look at him as she speaks. "I can remember everything about that day. I...I used to be so girly." There is disgust in her voice at how simply and naive she used to be. "I wish I could have stopped it his death."

She feels him shift, closer to her. "I wish I hadn't taken Octavia out. She would never have been caught if it hadn't been for me."

"That's not true Bellamy. Someone would have found Octavia sooner or later and you know it. It wasn't your fault." She knows though that Bellamy doesn't believe her. She's an expert in guilt.

After a while, when Clarke thinks they're done talking, she hears him speak again. "I don't dream about my mother though. Not in my nightmares. The one I now have are usually about Mount Weather, when we were trying to get out before the bomb blew."

Clarke remembers it: they had decided to blow the place up, killing everyone, another thing that left her feeling guilty. They had to set the bomb up and make a mad dash. It had been close. It had to be – they had to plant more than one bomb to set off a chain reaction. They knew that if they were going to kill them, they would have to succeed. They didn't want them coming after them.

(She will deal with that guilt later)

"In the nightmare all the walls look the same. I'm beginning to panic and most of the time I wake up when I feel the cave walls fall in."

"Most of the time?" At first she feels stupid for saying anything; telling someone about a nightmare feels strangely personal.

But Bellamy continues anyway. "Sometimes when I'm going through the caves I see a light. And then I see you." Even in the blackness she can see him smile. For some reason her heart feels like its hammering. "Then I know I'm okay."

In that moment, she wants to punch him. What the hell does he mean by that? But there's something else happening in her too: a light feeling, a good feeling, spreading through her chest and she wants to laugh and cry all at once.

She smiles in the end. "I have that dream too. I see you and then I realise you're never going to leave me." She puts on a face of mock-horror. "It's my worst nightmare."

Seeing Bellamy grin lightens her heart. "I was trying to be honest, princess." He lungs for her and pins her down. She can't help squeals and he pins her, and the two of them start wrestling. She has forgotten how much fun it can be to fight when the person you're fighting doesn't actually want to kill you. She tries to push Bellamy off, especially when he begins to tickle her. Her laugh is loud and echoes through the room.

"OI!" Another voice, a man's, shouts from somewhere close. "Some of us are trying to sleep!"

Bellamy relinquishes her, but the two of them are grinning. They settle back down, and automatically he lifts his arm up. She moves under it without thinking, resting her head back on his chest. His breath lands on her head and she closes her eyes, reassured that he is close.


At first Clarke doesn't notice that the new girl, Mel, hangs around Bellamy quite often. She's only aware that Mel happens to be in the room when Bellamy is, but she and Bellamy are usually discussing important matters and her mind is on other things.

But one day she sees Mel smile at Bellamy, and there's something in it. Her eyes are bright and she's paying attention to every word he's saying (Clarke knows that Bellamy can inspire the masses, but c'mon). She pauses, in the act of preparing to stitch up one of the guards wounds. Come to think of it, Mel is often smiling at Bellamy, asking questions about what he's doing and what he did before he came down to Earth. She practically gushes when she finds out he came down to protect his little sister. Clarke knows that Bellamy saved her life; has Mel got a crush on him?

It shouldn't bother her; but to her surprise she feels uneasy over this newfound knowledge. In the evening when everyone is round the campfire, she is sitting with Octavia and Raven, across from Bellamy. He is getting warm by the fire, surrounded by people. Clarke is comforted by the fact that Miller is there, along with Jasper and Monty. Bellamy knows that these people, the ones that have been with him from the beginning, he can trust.

But Mel is there too. She is standing next to Bellamy, apparently fascinated by a joke that Jasper is telling them. Clarke peers through the darkness at Bellamy's face. He's listening to Jasper, a bit of a grin on his face. Relaxed Bellamy is different from warrior Bellamy, from worried Bellamy. When he's worried he commands, controls, needs to know everything. He's good; but he can also snap at people, and be short tempered. He doesn't have time for jokes. Now though, with the Mountain Men gone (please God let that be true) and allied with the Grounders, he's eager to laugh. And he laughs easily. She sees him let out a surprised laugh (Mel does too, but Clarke can tell she doesn't really find it as funny as Bellamy does), his head going back a little. Smiling Bellamy is different too: it reminds Clarke of how young he really is. She forgets it so easily, after all they've been through –

"Earth to Clarke?"

The girl jerks her head round. Both Raven and Octavia are staring at her. Clearly they've been trying to get her attention for a while. "Sorry," she says, attempting to smile.

"What's got you wearing you're frowny face?" asks Raven. Octavia is faster on the uptake though. She glances over at Bellamy, who is now talking (and smiling) with Mel.

"My brother's an idiot," she says.

"I'm not-" Clarke begins, but Octavia is already on her feet. Carrying her drink she moves towards her brother. She casually moves in between him and Mel, in the pretence of leaning against Bellamy. He smiles down at his little sister, and Clarke feels a wave of warmth towards the Blake siblings. In a few minutes Octavia has successfully led Bellamy away from Mel, the two of them in deep conversation. Once she loses sight of them Clarke watches Mel slink off with a couple of girls who came down with the Ark.

"So," Raven starts. She's been watching Clarke. "What are you going to do?"

"About what?"

She snorts. "C'mon Clarke." When Clarke continues to look bemused she says, "Everybody knows."

"Knows what?"

"Knows that you and Bellamy have feelings for each other."

"We don't – I don't-"

"Sure," she scoffs. "You're just friends."

"We are-"

"That's why you're giving him sappy, longing looks? Or why, every time that Mel girl talks to him, you look as if you're about to stab someone?"

Clarke is shaking her head. "Bellamy's my friend. I care about him."

Raven keeps her gaze on her for a second before shrugging. "If that's your story, fine. But just so you know, we've all got a pool going for how long it'll take before you and Bellamy start being one of those disgusting making-out-in-front-of-everyone couples."

Clarke, who had taken a sip of her drink, chokes on it. "You've got a pool going? Like, a bet?"

Raven nods. "It would be really helpful you if you could, y'know, get together in about a week? Miller's put up that hat he always wears and I would love to take it off him, and Wick has promised to give me full reign in the workshop if I win."

"Wick is in on this?"

Raven rolls her eyes. "Everyone is in on it," she tells Clarke.

The next day she is in the medical room, keeping it clean. It irritates her a little that her mother has taken over, but her annoyance is quashed since her mother helps so many people, does more than Clarke could do. And they need to work as a team. Clarke knows this too.

"Princess!" Bellamy walks in as he owns the place. "Where the hell have you been?"

Clarke rolls her eyes. "I'm a healer, Bellamy. Where else would I be?"

"With me," he answers. Clarke feels a little jump in her stomach, a zap of energy. "We're trying to decide the layout for where we're going to build the houses. I want you in on it. Kane's trying to take charge." He gives Clarke a meaningful look. Kane and Abby are the ones who are making it difficult for Clarke and Bellamy. Kane sees them as children who have caused nothing but problems; and Abby would rather Clarke sit back then be involved in the big things, no matter how trivial. Jaha is actually the one that listens to them. Bellamy and Clarke agree that it is better if they present a united front among the adults. It's not hard. They are use to it.

"I'll meet you by the front gate," he says.

"If you just let me wash my hands-" Clarke begins.

"It's not that; Mel wants a word."

"Oh, well if Mel wants a word..." She turns away from him, suddenly annoyed. She doesn't recognise this girl, the one that is jealous and snipes in a funny voice. When Raven came to Earth, when she was heartbroken over Finn (so long ago; she doesn't feel like the same girl anymore) she didn't behave like this, even though she was mad and upset. She and Bellamy aren't an item. Why is she acting so childish?

She hears Bellamy pause. "What do you mean?"

Immediately she regrets that she spoke. "Nothing," she mutters.

She thinks that'll be the end of it, but she feels a hand on her shoulder. It's warm but it's not soft. "Clarke," he says. He pulls her round and she, knowing that Bellamy can be like a dog with a bone, half-heartedly fights back. "What's going on? Talk to me?"

She hadn't intended to say anything, but suddenly the words are pouring out of her like water. "I just think – I don't like Mel, okay? It's stupid and there's no reason for it, I'm sure she's very nice, but I don't want you to date her. I know I have no right to ask you that, I know I have no claim over you or anything, but you're my best friend and I just – I don't like her, okay?"

She whirls back round again, focusing on clearing the medical table. I've done it now, she thinks. Bellamy would tell her it was none of her business, and that she had no right to tell him what to do. Things would be awkward between them now. Clarke feels a little swoop of fear in her throat at the thought of Bellamy leaving her alone at night. She has grown use to his presence. The thought of him not being with her when she wakes up from a nightmare – it hurts –

"Okay."

Clarke looks at him; the word was so quiet she's not certain if he actually said something.

"I won't date her." He lifts his shoulders. "I was only planning to sleep with her anyway; I'm not the dating type."

If he's making a joke, she isn't laughing. "Why would you do that?" she asks.

The thing is, he doesn't look away from her. He doesn't look embarrassed at all. "I don't like her the way you think I do. And yeah, you're being completely unreasonable, but you're my co-leader. And you're my best friend too." He shrugs, acting like it's no big deal, but Clarke feels like she's about to burst into tears. "C'mon, or Kane will start planning a monument in his honour-"

He is taken off guard when she jumps into his arms. She buries her chin in his shoulder, wrapping her arms round him. Like the first hug, he pauses before he puts his arms round her too. This hug is gentler, not as desperate or as relieved as the one before, but just as heartfelt.

"Thank you," she murmurs, and hurries away before she can reveal anymore.


By the time she finally makes it to their room, Bellamy is sitting up and in a bad mood. "Where've you been?" he demands. As a rule they don't sleep without each other. They might make jokes about the buddy system, but Clarke and Bellamy are the ones who abide by it to the letter. They can't keep calm without the other being there.

"Held hostage," she mutters. She quickly changing into her "pyjamas", using a makeshift cover so she and Bellamy can get dressed and undressed in the room without the other one seeing.

"What?"

Now changed she crawls under the makeshift tent, pulling the covers over her. On cue Bellamy lifts his arm up and allows Clarke to nestle underneath. "My mom tried to get me to stay in her room. She doesn't want me to share with you anymore."

Bellamy considers. "Well, it's not a surprise. She doesn't like me. Every time I call you princess she looks like she's going to stick a needle in my arm to shut me up."

"She's told me that the contraceptive stuff they fed us before we left the Ark is going to wear off in a few weeks, if not already, and she says she has enough on her plate without being a grandmother too."

Far from being annoyed, Bellamy looks down at her in puzzlement. "But we're not having sex."

"Well I know that Bellamy, but she doesn't. Ever since the night we got back she thinks we've been having sex every night – you're fault by the way," she says, poking him above his hip, a ticklish spot she's found.

The warm air is beginning to make them feel sleepily. "She'll just have to live with it, won't she?"

Clarke turns her head, muttering grumpily, "It would be nice if you would make a bit more of an effort with her. She is my mother."

"And why does that concern me?"

"It would make things easier for me, wouldn't it?" snaps Clarke. She's already had to deal with her mother, she's not in the mood for an argumentative Bellamy too. "At least I wouldn't have to have these arguments with her. I don't want to have to go between the two of you."

She turns away abruptly.

A few minutes she hears Bellamy sigh. "I'll be nice to her," he grumbles. "Or at least as nice as I can be. I can't promise anything." This time he turns into her, putting his nose in her hair. She squeezes his arm to let him know that she's not mad at him. Now she allows herself to focus entirely on the fact his chest is fitted against her back.


It's only a few days later when Bellamy takes a few people on a hunting trip, a small part of a larger hunting party. Clarke is helping them lay the foundation for the houses when she hears the gates opening. She walks towards them, with a list of things in her head that she wants to talk to Bellamy about, and then freezes.

Suddenly she is running. "What happened?"

Through the blood on his face, Bellamy winces. "Don't over-react princess, okay?"

"Don't over-react?" Her voice is higher than normal. A crowd is beginning to form. She looks over at the other boys, John and Miller among them. Miller is limping. "What happened?" she repeats.

"We were hunting a wild pig," says Miller. He and John have been carrying the large animal between them, and they place it down on the floor. "It didn't come quietly. Caught Bellamy in the face and rammed into my leg."

"I injured my hand," says John, wincing as he moves it.

"We caught it though." Clarke can hear the pride in Bellamy's face.

"Oh well, that's okay then, provided you've caught the animal. Who cares if it could have killed you?" The sarcasm is easy to detect, but far from looking irritated Bellamy grins at her. She feels a wave of annoyance towards him.

With more force than necessary she pulls him towards the medbay. "You're face needs sorting out."

Out of nowhere Abby appears. "I'll sort him Clarke," she offers. "You can make sure the houses are-"

"No, I'll sort Bellamy out," she interrupts. She jerks her head at the two boys behind her. "Go take care of those two." Before her mother can protest she leads Bellamy into the medbay. She thinks he's quickened his pace too.

She lies him down on the table and begins to clean his face. They've created some juice out of some beans (which taste horrible, as Jasper found out the hard way) which has made some sort of antiseptic. Stings like hell when it goes on, but it works. Clarke is pleased to see Bellamy wince.

"I know you're mad," he says. Clarke snorts in reply. "I'm sorry, okay? We had to get the animal-"

"For God's sake, the other hunting parties have brought food back! You could have lost an eye." She dabs the juice on the cut. Bellamy winces. "You'll just have another pretty scar on your face now. Well done."

"Like I'm bothered about scars." He winces again, his eyes blinking. "Stop it already Clarke." He grabs her wrist with his hand. It feels easily round it, like his hand was made for her. This time she can feel the burning from his touch, spreading right down to her groin. She looks at him. She doesn't glance or glare or scowl, she just looks at him. He looks at her.

Slowly their heads move towards each other, two magnets pulling together. Clarke can see Bellamy's eyes flickering to her face, making sure it's okay.

When their lips touch the fire comes. It's like she's swallowed some of Monty's super strong moonshine, and it spreads throughout her entire body. Her lips burn and her hands ache for him, and she can't breathe properly. Her mind is wiped clean of everything else accept this kiss. If this is what being kissed is like, then she's never been kissed before in her life. This kiss is one that makes her ache for more, a kiss that makes her weak at the knees and her arms tremble. This kiss is like finding out that there is more to life than what you think, finding out that there is more to you than you thought. It's like being reborn.

They break away too soon. She looks at his face and can see that he is ablaze with their kiss; and she knows she is wearing the exact same expression.


They are in their room in less than a minute. They collide with the tent over the bed, knocking it down. He is kissing her and his kisses burn, they are like fire –

She tries to lift her shirt up but he does it for her. She unclasps her bra as he lifts his shirt off, and oh God, his chest is so perfect and muscular and God –

He bends down then, kissing her again. She has never wanted anything so badly in her life, has never wanted to be with anyone more. He is touching her all over and every time their skin meets it is like being set alight. Her lips are on his skin and she loves the way they are still burning, loves the way –

He is taking his bottoms off and her hands are already going to hers. "We can't let this ruin things," she says as they land on the bed together. "If this is going to make things awkward then we should stop-"

"Like hell I'll stop," Bellamy growls. He presses her down on the bed. His hand snakes up to her breasts and they yearn for his touch. "Relax princess. Nothing's going to go wrong. This," he says, planting another kiss on her lips, "is right."

When they're done they lie on the bed. They are touching each other so easily, so much, that it almost kills her to realise how simple it is. He strokes her hair and, with a smile that could power the camp, she turns her face into him.


"Touch. It is touch that is the deadliest enemy of chastity, loyalty, monogamy, gentility with its codes and conventions and restraints. By touch we are betrayed and betray others...an accidental brushing of shoulders or touching of hands...hands laid on shoulders in a gesture of comfort that lies like a thief, that takes, not gives, that wants, not offers, that awakes, not pacifies. When one flesh is waiting, there is electricity in the merest contact."

Wallace Stegner


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