Caught

The Guildhall

"Laxus," Mira giggled. "Behave."

He just leaned further down, continuing to nuzzle his head against her neck. "You smell nice."

"Laxus-"

"Ain't nobody around, Mira," he whispered against her neck before kissing it. "We're alone. It's so early in the morning, ain't no one out."

"Still," she said as she allowed herself to be pulled closer by the arm wrapped around her shoulder. It wasn't even sunup yet and they seemed to be the only ones around. Usually Mira would be making the walk over to the guildhall alone, but after spending the night at Laxus' apartment, he had decided he would accompany her.

"Besides," he had reasoned. "I want to get a crack at the board before any of those losers snag a good job."

"I really wish you didn't have to leave again so soon," Mira told him softly as they continued on down the street. "I feel like you just got home."

"Don't get clingy on me now, Mira," he warned as the guild came into view. Dropping his arm from her shoulders, he said simply, "Quickest way for me to lose interest."

"Lucky me, I know exactly how to get you to regain interest." Then she started giggling again which only succeeded in causing him to roll his eyes. "What sort of job are you looking for, Laxus?"

"You know me. The one that pays the most."

"Hmmm. Are you taking the others with you?"

He snorted. "No."

"You're going alone then?" Mira looked up at him slightly concerned. "Are you sure that's a good idea?"

"What? You wanna come with me?"

That set her off into giggles. "Of course not, Laxus. I was only asking."

Grunt. They were at the guild then and he opened the door for her. "You gonna make me dinner when I get back?"

"If you want. What sort of meal are you thinking of?"

"Surprise me."

"Well, go pick a job so we can figure out how long you'll probably be gone. Wouldn't want to spend all day on a roast if you won't even be back for it."

"A roast, eh?"

"Maybe."

"Then I'll make it a short trip. Gotta get back for that, huh?" He leaned down to kiss her neck again when they walked into the building, her giggling all the same. When he turned away from her though to bound up to the second floor to pick a mission, he found that they weren't alone.

Makarov was sitting much how he always was, cross-legged on the bar, clearly waiting for someone. Mirajane, no doubt, as she would be the only one that would be around at such an hour. He only blinked in surprise however at what he had just seen.

"M-Master," Mira said slowly as she walked over to him. Laxus only stood there staring for a moment before making a noise and heading towards the second floor. "What are you doing here so early? Usually-"

"I wanted to speak to you about the upcoming S-Class trials," he said slowly. "But perhaps something new has decided our conversation topic."

"I don't know what you're talking about, Master." Mira was back to her perky self then, falling easily into the façade with the current environment. "Did you-"

"I'm old, Mirajane, but I'm not that old."

"How about you just mind your own business then, old man?" Laxus was coming back down the stairs then, a job request in his hands. "'cause true me, Gramps, this don't involve you at all."

"What did you pick?" Mira asked Laxus, wanting off the subject at hand as soon as possible. "Something fun?"

He grunted, going over to the bar as she went to stand behind it. Handing over the job request, he said, "Simple enough, huh?"

"You two are just going to ignore the elephant in the room then?" Makarov asked then, glancing at each in turn. "My eyesight hasn't left me yet."

"I don't know what you're talking about, Master. Remember?" Mira smiled at him before looking back to Laxus. "Did you want something to eat or drink before you take off?"

"Nah. Think I'll head out now," he told her with a frown. Had his grandfather not been there, he'd have no doubt stayed around with her until others started to show up.

"The sooner you leave, the sooner you get back," Mira agreed though she was clearly disappointed too.

"The sooner you get a roast too, from what I hear."

Mira couldn't help the slight blush then, but Laxus only turned to walk away. Whatever. So the stupid old man knew that he was messing around with Mirajane. So what? It's not like they were kids. They were grown.

Still, she did call out to him as he was nearly to the door. "Bye, Laxus!"

Ugh. Raising his hand, he gave her some sort of slight wave before he was off, leaving both of them behind.

So Gramps knew. That wasn't too bad. Who would the old man tell? Better yet, who would believe him? Their relationship was practically as secret as it ever had been.

Right?

The Apartment

Laxus snored a little when he slept. More of a slight hum. It was a comfort to Mira for some reason though as she snuggled ever closer to him. He was actually rather cuddly, or at least he put on the rouse for her when she was in the mood for it. At the moment, his hands were limp against her back as his arms relaxed with his slumber, but before they had been firm and tight, clutching her to him.

It wasn't like she wanted to wake him up, but she could not help herself as her fingers slowly began to trace the lines of his intricate tattoo, following the lines up his shoulder and back down again. It was almost as good as when she traced it with her tongue.

"Mira," he grumbled softly, letting out a slow breath. "Tired."

She only kissed his chin. "You spent two weeks away, Laxus. Shouldn't you be more concerned with me than you are with sleep?"

"So concerned," he mumbled as she nuzzled against his neck. "Mira."

"I don't feel like you are."

"Mmmm. Just sleep for now. In a few hours, I'll show you just how interested I am again, huh?"

With that sort of incentive, Mirajane just rolled over onto her side and let him snuggle her back to him. A few hours was nothing compared to the countless ones that she spent worrying while he was off on jobs.

She must have fallen asleep because at some point she was awoken by the violent sound of someone, as she would later find out, climbing through Laxus' bedroom window before tripping and banging their head against a dresser.

"Laxus!" the person yelled. She sat up almost immediately, confused for a moment as she held the bed sheet against her chest. Laxus, however, was always quicker to power surges than Mirajane and must have been having a pretty rough dream, because he sprang into action from the second he sat up in bed. Light filled the room suddenly as electricity shot through his finger tips. In the flashes, Mirajane saw pink hair, a blue cat, and her overly horrified sister.

"We know that you have Mirajane, Laxus!" Natsu yelled. "Where is- Mira?"

"The fuck do you think your doing?" Laxus jumped up immediately, rearing his fist back as he advanced on Natsu.

The pink mage only began laughing. "Laxus, you're, like, totally naked dude."

"What is going on?" Mira still didn't get out of bed, only staring at her sister, their eyes finding each other in the darkness. "Lisanna? What are you-"

"I tracked you here," Natsu said as he jumped out of the way of Laxus' flying fist. Happy yelled as it almost hit him. "With my nose."

"Why the hell would you-"

"You didn't come home, Mirajane," Lisanna cut Laxus off. "And Elfman and I… You never haven't come home before. And no one saw you this afternoon at the guild, because you took off, so-"

"Wait, are you naked too?" Natsu finally tried to attack Laxus, but the bigger man only shoved him to the ground. "What exactly-"

"Natsu, get out. And Laxus, stop it." Mira was on her knees then, though she clutched the sheet ever tighter against her chest. "And Lisanna..."

"Get the fuck out of my apartment!" Laxus raged as Happy hightailed it out the window.

"Come on, Natsu," he called.

"No fighting," Mira yelled as Natsu moved to strike Laxus. "I mean it."

"Natsu, stop," Lisanna whispered as she just stood in the corner, more concerned with her naked sister than anyone else. Oh, and if she could avoid seeing Laxus fully naked, that would be great too. "Just leave."

"No way." He was still rubbing his head, him no doubt being the one to run into the dresser a moment ago. "Not when he's raping Mirajane."

"Raping?" Laxus raved. "You little-"

"Get out, Natsu." Mira was beginning to get irritated as her tone dropped its false happy pitch and took on its real one. "Now!"

In the end, it took Lisanna to separate the men, promising Natsu that she would meet him and Happy outside after everything was said and done. Then, him gone through the window, she left the bedroom to wait in the living room. It didn't take Mirajane long to hurry and dress to get out there.

"So that's why I couldn't say anything," Mira finished a few minutes later as she sat next to her sister on Laxus' couch. For his part, he was going through his cabinets looking for some hard liquor to wash away the whole night. "I mean, it's really wouldn't be good, you understand? For Laxus and I to be…for others to know…"

Lisanna was still sitting there wide-eyed. "You could have told Elf and me though, Mira. I mean-"

"I know. I'm sorry. I really did mean to come home tonight. It's just-"

"She ain't a fucking child, Mira," Laxus grumbled as he mixed a soda in with some rum. "Tell her straight. We were fucking. Get the hell over it."

Lisanna only blushed while Mira stared at her.

"And that's mainly why we can't officially be together," she concluded. Then she reached out to pat her sister on the shoulder. "You understand?"

Glancing over at Laxus, who was still drinking in the kitchen, Lisanna slowly said, "Mira…I don't get it."

"Just please don't tell-"

"Not that. Believe me; I can see keeping him a secret."

Laxus gave her a snide grin back. "Don't see anyone crawling up you either, chick."

"But why him?" Lisanna was staring at her sister once more. "I mean, he's not exactly-"

"It's complicated," Mira said, which is what she told herself whenever she reflected on the same thing. "Very, very complicated."

"Ain't too complicated. We got drunk, fucked, and now we like it." Laxus took a long gulp from his cup, staring at them from the open kitchen area. "Now get out. Both of you if you ain't coming back to bed, Mira."

Rolling her eyes, she looked back at her shocked sister. "He's just kidding, Lisanna. He's only trying to act tough because he's afraid that you saw us snuggling before."

"Shut the fuck up, Mira."

Lisanna only blinked. Then, grinning devilishly, she asked, "Are you sure that it wasn't the fact that I totally just saw you completely naked, Laxus?"

He didn't even seem bashful about it. "Ain't ever banged sisters. Keep screwing with me, and I might mark it off the list."

"Laxus! Just go to bed," Mira complained as he only glared one more time at Lisanna before stalking off.

"I still don't get it, Mira," Lisanna finally said when they were alone in the strange apartment. Reaching out, Mira only grabbed onto her sister's cheeks and smiled at her.

"I don't expect you to. Or anyone. And that's why no one can know. Not to mention, I'm not sure what it would do to my tips at the bar if everyone knew Laxus was my boyfriend."

"Is he?"

"Is he what?"

"Actually your boyfriend?"

"I dunno," Mira admitted slowly. Then she grinned and moved to kiss Lisanna's head. "But I'm willing to stick around to find out."

When she got back to bed, Laxus had stripped again, letting it be known without words that he expected her to do the same. After that, she moved to climb back into bed with him.

"She gone?"

"Mmmm."

"Your fucking siblings, man."

She snuggled back into his chest, but he wasn't too receptive then. The moment was lost, fine, but that just gave her a new objective; either reclaiming it or finding a new one.

"You tell her to tell that freak that if he ever comes into my place again, I'll-"

"Calm down." She stroked his chest gently as she settled out against it. "I told her that she can tell Elfman that I was with a man, but that was it. And to reiterate to Natsu and Happy that this never happened. Not that anyone would ever believe them anyhow."

"Why?" Laxus had his hands behind his head and shifted to flex his arms slightly. "I'm sexy as fuck, your hot enough to be sinful. Why shouldn't we fuck?"

"Stop saying that." She nuzzled his chest. "The point is that it's fine. We're safe. This is safe."

"Like I was ever worried."

She leaned up to kiss his lips then, gently. Then, still right in front of his face, she whispered, "Sinful, huh?"

"'course. Ain't nothing more of a sin than screwing the devil himself. Or rather herself. If you do it right, that is." He grinned at her. "Do I do it right, Mira?"

"Mmmm…can't remember." She shifted to drape a leg across his. "And we can't have that."

"No, we can't."

"You think…you can do that thing with your fingers? The lightening thing? That lit up the room a minute ago?"

He only grinned slightly. "Only if I can fuck Satan herself."

"You're in luck. After all that, I'm stressed." She moved to fully straddle him. "Stressed as hell."

He shifted to sit up. "Sounds perfect."

"You have no idea."

So okay, so Lisanna knew. And Gramps. But neither of them would say anything. And Natsu was more unreliable than that cat of his and neither had much credit in the truth department. So basically, they were safe.

Then again, when weren't they?

The Party

It was a big deal when Gajeel finally went out on a job. Mainly because they were able to have a band perform on the stage without him thinking he needed to get up there and play his stupid guitar. They usually had a party that first day and the last day he was supposed to be gone. The only ones who seemed to think it was wrong were Juvia, who would forget all about it being rude to Gajeel the second Gray asked her to dance (or she tricked him into asking her) and Levy, who wasn't necessarily dating Gajeel (or so she said), but did care about him a bunch.

Still, they were a pretty big deal for everyone. Laxus usually avoided the guild on those days, but it just so happened to fall on the day he got back from a particularly long job once and when he went to the guild to check-in with Mira, he got stuck in the middle of a concert.

"Do we really have this many members?" he yelled at her over the sound of the crowd and whatever band was up on stage. She was walking passed with a tray of beer and hardly glanced at him.

"Of course, Laxus. We have a lot of people in the guild. You just only pay attention to our friends. That's all."

Friends. Right. Snort.

He wanted to leave, of course he wanted to leave, but first he at least wanted to get a drink. Heading over to the bar, he found a horribly overworked Lisanna who still seemed slightly skittish around him after finding her sister over at his apartment some odd weeks back.

Taking a seat at the packed bar, Laxus ordered his usual, though he kept glancing around, watching Mirajane happily at work, not breaking a sweat ever. She was in her element, after all. And all the tips she was getting didn't hurt either.

"I'm going on break," she called to Lisanna at one point as she walked by. "Ten minutes. I need to clear my head, huh?"

"Sure, sis," Lisanna agreed, though it was clear she wasn't so certain about being left alone. Laxus only frowned, but didn't say anything as he focused mostly on his liquor.

When Mirajane didn't reappear in a timely fashion, however, he told Lisanna that he would go and find her. She had disappeared into the back, but her sister was too busy up front to go look for her.

"Here you are, Mirajane," he sighed as he got to the book room of the guildhall. She was in there, organizing some books that had been left out. "What are you doing? You-"

"Master wanted this all done by tonight. I forgot about the silly band coming to play." She was working hurriedly and didn't even stop to look at him. "So I thought I could multitask and-"

"You said you were taking a break."

"Compared to all that, this is a break."

Snorting, he came over to her. She was up on the ladder, shoving some books back in their place.

"You do this a lot? You're supposed to be a barmaid, not-"

"I'd do anything for Master," she assured him as she came down the ladder, empty handed. Just as quickly, she went to grab another stack of books. "And when he asks me to do something, I try to get it done as fast as possible."

"I'm sure, Mirajane, that if you just asked Gramps, he'd be fine with you doing this tomorrow."

"I would never ask him to give me more time on such a simple task."

"Simple? Mirajane, you work more than anyone I know."

"Master gave me everything I have now," she told him as she walked passed. "I would do anything for- Laxus."

He had caught her arm and wasn't ready to let it go. "Stop for a minute. You need to-"

"I have to hurry, Laxus, and get back to Lisanna. She-"

"The girl doesn't work half as hard as you and takes way more time off. So let her suffer a little for once. She's a big girl. She can handle it."

"Lax-"

He jerked her arm then slightly, until she was rested against his chest. "I said to stop."

Now, Laxus never deluded himself. Mirajane was one of the strongest wizards around. He couldn't force her to do shit. However, he also knew that sometimes she had a tendency to forget that fact. And at the moment, he wanted some time alone with her.

It had been a hard job, after all.

"I don't get to see you, but a few times out of the month. You really think I want to watch you restock books? Huh? These stupid morons in this guild, making you work harder than you have to," he grumbled as he leaned down to kiss her head. "They need to learn to clean up after themselves."

"While that would be nice, I don't see it happening any time soon."

Grunt. Then, after a moment, he whispered, "I am so fucking horny."

"L-Laxus!"

She was trying to act offended. Psst. He only grinned slightly, releasing her elbow then. Slowly, she turned to look at him before going to put the books back down on one of the tables.

"I cant get off early, Laxus. Not with all of this going on. I-"

"Who said anything about going home?"

That got her to stare into his eyes. Then she blushed. "La-"

"You know you think it'd be hot to fuck in the guild." Advancing on her once more, he reached out to grab her face in his hands. "You little dirty demon."

She turned her head when he tried to kiss her, though it wasn't in a resistant kind of way. She wanted him to kiss her neck. As he went to work on it, she mumbled, "There's no one in the infirmary, I guess. W-We could go up there and-"

"And get caught back up in that party? No effing way." He dropped his hands then to her hips, which he immediately grasped before lifting her up and setting her on the table, knocking the books down in the process. "Right here, right now."

"Lax-"

"Don't worry. We'll get the infirmary one day too."

"B-But someone might-"

"Over that noise, baby, you can be even louder than you are in my apartment." Then he grinned. "And shit you're loud in the apartment."

"Mmmm." She was giving in. She always gave in. "Laxus."

He pushed up the end of her dress slightly, running his hands slowly up her thighs. "These feel frilly, babe."

"I knew you'd be back today."

"Did you?"

"Mmmhmm."

"Well, you are quite mistaken about what I like."

"Oh?"

Leaning down, he breathed against her ear, "You're much sexier without them."

She had taken to messing with his pants then, giggling slightly when he bit at her ear. "Laxus-"

"You've gotta be louder, babe. Can't hear you over the mus-"

"L-Laxus!" Suddenly, her hands were away from his pants and up on his chest, shoving him away. Frowning, he glanced over his shoulder to find a very shocked Erza Scarlet, her cheeks about the shade of her hair at that point.

"L-Lisanna asked for me to look for you. She needs your help." Erza just stood there, at the bottom of the stairs, staring at the two of them. "I…I am shocked."

Mira was blushing pretty deeply as well as Laxus looked away from Erza, as if embarrassed.

"And now…now I am going to chalk this up to being drunk, all of us being drunk, and am going to forget about this." Slowly, she turned to walk away. "Although I am very disappointed in both of you, drunk or not."

"Just fuck off, Erza," Laxus growled, though he wasn't too loud. The last thing he wanted to do was fight with her in that moment. Mira was still silent though, watching her past rival leave them alone in the room once more.

"Shit," Mira uncharacteristically cursed as she slowly hopped down from the table. "Now Erza knows."

"She thinks we're drunk." He paused. "Which is actually kinda good. So she'll just act like-"

"How many now, Laxus? Natsu, Happy, Lisanna, Master. And now Erza? Oh, she'll use this against me for the rest of my life."

"Hey, I ain't that much of a shame now, am I?"

Absently, she reached up to rest a hand on his chest before moving to straighten her dress. "Yes, well, Lisanna needs me, so-"

"We already have been found out, babe." He moved to grab her. "Let's-"

"Tonight. Maybe. I'm still just…" Flushed. Her whole body was red then. "I need to get back to work."

"Mirajane-"

"Can you be helpful and clean up these books around here?" She glanced up at his face finally. "Please?"

"After not even getting head?" Snort. "No."

"Laxus-"

"Fine. Fucking fine. I never get shit around here. I'm supposed to be the fucking guild master by now! You'd be calling me your master, not that stupid old man."

She only reached up to ghost a hand over his scarred eye. "Behave. And thank you."

"Stupid Mirajane," he was grumbled even ten minutes after she was gone. He was doing as asked though, because no matter what, she was always his little demon. He'd do her bidding for the rest of their lives, he feared. And she didn't even have to put out anymore! It was sickening, truly.

"How does this fucking system even work?" he yelled up the stairs at no one. "Why the hell would I even know how to put away books!"

Nothing. Now that she thought that the stuff downstairs was getting taken care of, she would focus fully on the bar. Great. Now men got to gawk at his girl while he was busy putting way some damn books.

"I hate this place. All of it," he complained as he went around, looking for where a specific book went. Mirajane did it all with ease, but then, she wasn't him. She liked work. He just liked the money that came from it. She felt like she owed Master Makarov her life. He felt like Gramps owed him his life.

"She owes me more than head after this," he went on as he walked around the room. "Stupid devil."

The Date

"You really think this is a nice jacket? I just found it at the market yesterday," the woman went on as her boyfriend sat across from her, focused mostly on his food.

"Beautiful," he told her with a nod of his head. Then, slinging back some water from his glass, he cleared his mouth before leaning against the table and staring across at her. "So you like this place, huh?"

They were seated outside a quaint little restaurant, far away from Magnolia and all their friends. The perfect spot to go out on a date. He had searched all over for a nice spot to make their place. It was where he planned on taking her from then on.

"It's cozy," she told him as she crossed on leg over the other and grinned across the table at him. "It was really sweet of you to take me here, Elfie."

The moniker made the man blush and look of, running a hand through his shock of white hair. "Yeah, well, you know. Anything for you, Ever. I just wish it didn't have to be this way."

"You know what everyone would say, if they knew we were together," Evergreen said. "And Bickslow and Freed would never let it go. Not to mention Laxus. Though I haven't seen him around much recently."

"Be thankful for that," Elfman said with a nod of his head. "I need to talk to that guy about what it means to be a real man. He sure is a chump."

"You just don't know him like I do is all, Elf."

He shook his head slightly. "Well, if you like him so much, maybe-"

"Oh, things would just be wonderful if the two of you became friends. Why, I'd-"

"Tell me, Ever, that I don't need to worry about you and this dope. Because I'd hate to think-"

"He's just a mentor to me, really. I respect him so much." Then, reaching across the table, she laid a hand over one of his. "You know that you're the only one for me, Elfman."

That made him smile slightly. "I love you."

"I love- Laxus?"

"You what?" He jerked his hand out from under hers, bucking up. "What-"

"No, Elfman. I love you, but- Just look." She was staring passed him then and he turned to see what she was staring at. Then, slowly, his eyes widened. "Is that your-"

"No. No way. Not big sis."

Sure enough, across the large patio sat Laxus and Mirajane. They were seated at a table for two, clearly on a date. Laxus had this big goofy grin on his face that Evergreen had never seen him wear before while Mira kept leaning over the table to feel his right bicep.

"You can feel the difference then, Mira?" he was asking as she moved to squeeze the left one. "I'm just got more muscles in that one. It's my dominate hand, after all."

"They're defined about the same."

He flexed when she moved to sit back in her seat. "Yeah, well, I don't lift for nothing."

Pouting then, she just stared at him. "That could be a fun date, don't you think? Working out together?"

"What? No. You aren't even on my level, babe." He gave her a look. "My warm up, your entire workout."

"You're so cute, Laxus." She giggled then, rather femininely, before giving him an evil stare. "You couldn't keep up with me and you know it. Especially when I work on my flying-"

"Yeah, okay, I concede." Grinning at her, he said, "Besides, I think we got this date thing down, don't you? This place is nice, eh?"

"Very."

"A lot better than just hanging around the damn guildhall all day." Then he winked at her. "It's hard to get you out of work, Mirajane, but when I do, all the better."

As she giggled some more, he moved to scoop up some food on his fork. It was then, however that a very peculiar scent hit his nose. Perplexed, he looked up. That almost smelt like-

And then it happened. From across the patio, their eyes locked and Evergreen and Laxus were both looking at one another with an equal amount of shock. Then he noticed that not only Evergreen was looking at them, but also Elfman. The first thing that hit him was panic and annoyance that they had been, once again, found out. Then he thought about something.

What the hell was Ever doing out with that Strauss idiot?

"Do you think he sees us?" Elfman mumbled softly to Evergreen as they both continued to stare at Laxus from their table.

"Yes, idiot, I think he sees us."

"Well, can't you do something? Turn him to stone or something?"

"In what way would that help anything, Elfman? I mean, honestly is there a brain in there or what?"

"Hey! Don't turn on me! He's the one that's out with-" Then he stopped, turning to face forwards again. "He's out with Mirajane. Laxus. She's on a date with…Dreyar. Then that means…do you think that he was the man that Lisanna told me…no. No way. Not big sis!"

Ever frowned, glancing back at him. "Well don't cry about it!"

Back with Laxus, Mirajane was beginning to notice his stare and glanced behind her. "What are you looking at, La- Oh no."

"Great." Reaching for a napkin, Laxus wiped his mouth as Ever turned her attention from him and to the man she was with. He was no doubt raving over the whole thing. "Now these idiots know."

"Awe!" Mira pressed a hand to her cheek as she looked back at Laxus. "Look! Ever and Elfman are so cute together. I-"

"Mirajane, can you focus on yourself for once? And by that, I mean us?"

"Hmmm?"

"They found us out, woman," he grumbled as he dropped the napkin to the table. "This completely ruins everything. There's no way that Evergreen and Elfman can keep their traps shut. We're sunk."

Mira was still giggling though. "Elfman and Evergreen. A green elf!"

"Would you listen to me, woman? We're screwed over here and you're playing games."

"Well, Laxus, I don't see this as a complete loss." She went back to her food as if nothing was wrong. "I mean think about it; we came out here for a reason. What was it?"

"To have dinner."

"Why so far though?"

"So no one would see-" He stopped himself. "They're doing the same thing."

"See? You're not completely stupid."

Ignoring the jab, he said, "Then that means they might have something on us, but we also have something on them."

"Mmmm. I think its damn sexy when you talk intelligently."

Not ignoring that one, he sent her a glare. "You know, Mira, you could be a little concerned."

"I'm more concerned about what we're doing next."

"Next?"

"I feel like you owe me a shopping spree."

"What?"

"It's only right. You not only flashed my little sister, embarrassed me in front of my rival, but have also now ousted me to my baby brother. I mean, honestly, Laxus, have you no decency?"

He blinked. Then he sighed. "Mira-"

"It's only fair."

Back over with Ever and Elfman, she had finally gotten him to calm down enough to speak. All he asked though was, "Do you think we should go over there?"

"Why? What are you going to do? Hit him?"

"A real man doesn't hide his women. Especially not one as beautiful as my big sister!"

Evergreen gave him a look. "What are you trying to say here, Elf?"

"Not you, Ever. You're different. This is different. Very different." He shrugged sheepishly at his mistake. "Besides, I would love to come out about our relationship, but you-"

"Yeah, well, your perky sister over there just ruined this all," Evergreen sighed dramatically. The moment did call for it, after all. "And I'm sure Laxus is going to hold this over our heads forever."

"Then we have to go over there," he insisted. "To straighten this out."

"Na-ah. I ain't going over there." Ever picked up her glass of wine while giving him a look all at the same time. "Laxus? Thunder God? No way. You go ruin his date. Not me though. I value my life."

Elfman only growled. "What kinda man is he not to ask me before taking my sister out?"

"Uh, a man that doesn't live as if women are property?" Evergreen suggested.

At that same moment, Laxus had just called the waiter for the check and was reaching into his pocket for his wallet.

"You about ready, babe?" he asked as Mira finished her drink.

"Mmmhmm. But you know that we're gonna have to pass them to get out of here, right? And something tells me that Elfman won't be too happy about this."

"Don't worry," he sighed. "I already got it covered."

Elfman and Evergreen were so busy arguing with one another about whether or not he was chauvinistic that they didn't even notice Laxus and Mirajane stand to leave. They did when they walked by though, as Laxus made a very pointed gesture of tossing a some jewels at them as well as a note. Elfman's eyes went to Mirajane, but she ignored him, all bundled up in Laxus' coat then and completely focused on holding his hand.

"What's it say?" Ever asked as Elfman slowly picked up the scrape of paper. It read,

Won't tell if you won't. And this is our place, losers. Stay out. Consider the jewels incentive to never speak of this and never come here again.

Then, in much prettier handwriting, it said,

Hi, Elfman! You and Evergreen are super cute together. Love you! Going back to Laxus' after this. Don't wait up.

Elfman just stared at the note for a few minutes while Evergreen counted the cash.

"More than enough to cover the bill. You think he'll want it back?"

"Incentive, remember?" Elfman mumbled as he sat the note down. Laxus Dreyar was…taking his sister home? His sister?

He thought he would be sick.

Mirajane, however, was feeling the exact opposite as her and Laxus left the restaurant and began walking down the empting streets. She was bubbly as ever, holding one of Laxus' big hands in both of hers, swinging it slightly as she practically stumbled along. Maybe she was drunk. He hoped not. Drunk Mira would be a lot less useful at the apartment.

"I think, Laxus, that that definitely qualifies me for a shopping spree."

Glancing down at her, he fought a smile at how cute she looked in his oversized jacket. With a grunt, he said, "Just a few things."

"Oh great!" She nuzzled his arm. Then, giggling, she added, "Right now though, there's only one thing I want."

Finally. Man, he had been waiting forever to get her back to his place.

"Ice cream!"

…What?

"Mirajane-"

"That dinner definitely deserves another course. And by course, I mean dessert."

He made a face down at her. "You know how much that cost me?"

"But don't you love me, Laxus?"

Love had never been used. At least not to his knowledge. Mira was unaware of this though as she swung his arm some more.

"Now that Elfman and Ever know though, I think most of our friends have found us out. Except for Bickslow, Freed, Lucy, Gray, Cana-"

"I don't have friends, Mirajane. And don't ever forget it."

She didn't respond to that though as she drug him down the street, practically dancing with excitement. "So I can get however much ice cream I want, huh? And whatever flavors?"

"Babe, where do you put all this away? Your fucking boobs?"

"It's the demon in me," she said, winking over her shoulder at him. He about took her right then and there. "Now come on! I want cookie dough. Ooh, no, chocolate. Ooh, no-"

"Both," he groaned, letting himself be dragged along behind her. So Ever and Elfman, huh? He felt like he and Mirajane weren't so weird after all. Maybe the guild was just pairing up as a way to keep the fairy blood in a line.

He sure hoped not. Because he had a sinking feeling Lisanna would either end up with Natsu, which would tie him to the pink freak, or he'd get with that ditzy blonde one and who the hell needed those two reproducing?

The Announcement

"Are you sure my tongue isn't bit through? 'cause it sure feels that way."

"Quit being a baby, Natsu," Lucy complained.

"Yeah," Lisanna agreed. "You act like you've never bitten your tongue before."

"Well maybe I haven't! Who are you to judge?"

Laxus rolled his eyes as he passed the table the three were seated at, the blue cat there as well though he kept quiet as he stuffed his face with fish. Annoying. Very, very annoying.

"Laxus." Mira smiled as he walked straight over to the bar. "You're back."

"Hmmm?" Cana, who was at the bar as well, glanced over at him. "Didn't notice you were gone."

"Thanks," he grunted as Levy passed, carrying a stack of books from the room downstairs.

"Welcome back, Laxus," she called cheerily as she headed over to the table where Gajeel and Pantherlily sat. At the sound of the name, Lily looked up before frowning. Thunder was the only thing he feared, after all.

"Don't worry, cat," Gajeel said as he patted him rather roughly between the ears. "Thunder boy won't do shit with his woman here."

Laxus and Mirajane heard that and looked over at him as Levy only blushed.

"The fuck you say, nut sucker?" Laxus glared over at him.

"What'd you just call me?"

"Careful before I send your little kitty cat into a panic attack."

Lily just reached up to pull his ears down. "This, Levy, cannot end well."

"You won't do bull, you little coward, with Mirajane around."

Laxus bucked up. "You wanna fucking bet?"

"Who told you?" Mira asked, too embarrassed to even act as if the accusation wasn't true. "Gajeel?"

"Lev-"

"Lucy told me first!" Levy yelled out, causing everyone who had tuned into Gajeel and Laxus' fight to look over.

"Hey!" Lucy glared over at her. "And it was stupid Natsu that started the whole thing by breaking into my place yelling about how Laxus raped you, Mirajane."

"He what?"

Makarov, who was seated up on the bar, let out a long sigh. "I never thought I would see this day. Perhaps it is time for me to step down, if this is how my guild shall fall. Strauss and Dreyar. The world has come to an end."

"Well, what was I supposed to do, Mirajane?" Natsu defended. "Not tell Lucy?"

"Yes!"

"Can we get back to this rape thing for a minute?" Gray asked, looking up from the table he and Juvia were at. "Because if you're talking about that thing in the bookroom, Erza said-"

"Erza said what?" Mirajane's voice hit that octave of Satan Soul. The red haired wizard looked over from the request board and blushed.

"I thought, Gray, that I mentioned not to tell anyone," she hissed at him.

"What exactly happened in my bookroom?" Makarov growled then, finally growing less amused with the situation and more annoyed. "Do I honestly have to discuss good work ethic-"

"You wanna talk about ethic, Gramps, when you work Mirajane seven fucking days a week most of the time?"

"Why, Laxus, I didn't know you were such a softy," Droy mocked.

"Lose a few and then talk, loser," he growled. Mirajane reached over and slapped his arm.

"Behave."

Gray about fell out of his chair with laughter. "Now that makes this whole thing worth it. What are you, Laxus? A man or a mouse?"

"Neither," Erza commented dryly as she went back to the job requests. "He is a dragon who just got slayed."

Mira, not one to ever take teasing from that specific mage, retorted with, "Careful, Erza, before we scope your apartment out for blue hairs."

"I do not know what you are suggestion," Juvia remarked. "But-"

"Trust me, Juvia," Gray sighed. "The last thing she's talking about is you."

"I told you not to talk about that either, Gray," Erza hissed once more. "Did you tell everyone that Jellal-"

"Oh dear," Makarov said slowly. "This whole guild has lost it."

Laxus was hoping that they would get off his fucking life and get onto Erza's, though that was partly because she acted so high and mighty constantly. The stupid-

"Can someone explain the rape thing, because I'm still all confused," Natsu said as Happy only sighed.

"What else is new?"

"Just be quiet, Natsu," Lucy told him softly.

"Yeah, we'll explain later," Lisanna assured him.

Laxus narrowed his eyes at them before looking back at where Ever and Elfman sat further down at the bar. Cana, who was on the other side of them, had actually put down her barrel as she stared interestedly over at all of them. Ever and Elfman, however, only sat facing forwards, her pretending to mess with her nails while Elfman became suddenly interested in a newspaper.

"You wanna talk about me and Mira? What about Ever and Elfman? They're totally together too!"

No one said anything for a moment. Then Makarov said, "Even I knew that, boy."

"What?" Elfman finally looked up.

"Yeah, I thought you guys have been dating for years now?" Lucy cocked her head to the side. When Ever sent her a glare though, she looked away. "Err…Natsu, come on. Let's go home."

"Home? To your place? Cool. I think I left something very important over there."

"And what would that be?"

"If I knew, Luce, I wouldn't have to go over there and tear the place apart looking for whatever it is, huh?"

"What? Natsu-"

"Wait for me guys," Happy yelled as he jumped up to chase after them as they ran out of the guild, Lucy getting as far away from Evergreen and her stare of stone as possible.

"You all knew?" Elfman dropped his newspaper. "Then what the hell have we been sneaking around for?"

"Beats me," Gray commented.

Mirajane was just staring at Laxus then, watching him. When he looked back at her, she gave him a long look. Then he sighed.

"Fine," he grumbled. "Mirajane and I are dating. Happy?"

"Not particularly, no," she sighed. "Ice cream would really make this all the-"

"No, Mira."

"You two are so cute! I'm so glad that I can finally say that," Lisanna giggled.

"You can't," Laxus growled at her with a glare. When Mira reached over to hit him again, he grabbed her hand. "And you can't do that either, woman."

"Hey!" Elfman stood. "That ain't no way to talk to a lady. Real men-"

"I'm about to beat you into a real man if you don't stay the fuck out of my relationship," Laxus growled as he released Mirajane. She only bounced slightly, clapping her hands.

"Yay! Relationship!" Then she giggled. "You said it, Laxus, not me."

Makarov jumped down from the counter then. "In any case, Mirajane, come with me for a moment."

"Something wrong?"

"You too, Laxus," he said, ignoring her.

"What is it, Gramps?"

"Did you two think I was kidding about appropriate behavior in the workplace?" He gave them each a look. "Come. Now."

After the three of them were gone, Juvia only leaned across the table and stared at Gray. He looked blankly back at her.

"When can we do that, Gray?" she asked him, her eyes practically hearts. He looked away. "Announce our relationship?"

"What relationship?"

"The one-"

"The only relationship you're about to have, Gray, is the one with my fist." Suddenly, Erza was behind him. Grabbing him by the back of his ear, she said, "And where are your clothes?"

"No fair, Erza." Juvia chased after them. "Gray is mine!"

"Trust me, you're not the blue hair she's after," Gray commented. Erza gave him a swift blow to the head before continuing to drag him out of the guild, his ever faithful (to their truly nonexistent relationship) water mage following behind.

"Glad that's over," Panthelily sighed as he released his ears.

"Told you I'd take care of ya, huh, cat?" Gajeel grunted as Levy finally sat down. "Ain't you glad we don't got that problem?"

"About thunder?" she asked as she moved to grab the first book in the stack.

"No." He nodded around, as if towards their general vicinity. "All this silly relationship shit. Load of crock."

She only stared at him before smiling softly and sighing. "Yeah, crock."

Still, when he reached over and pushed some of her hair out of her face, they shared a real smile that only Pantherlily saw. And unlike all the others, he would never tell a soul.