A/N: I wrote this in Geography whilst we were watching a film on Rainforests. The film was actually quite interesting, but writing Jily fics for you, my dear readers, is much more fun. So here it is! Enjoy!
DISCLAIMER: I REALLY hate doing these things. I don't own anything blah blah blah J.K Rowling owns everything etc etc. Done.
It wasn't gentle or kind or caring or loving. It was wild and ferocious, hands roaming, teeth nipping. It wasn't anything like what a first kiss was meant to be. A first kiss was meant to be soft and chaste, a quick peck on the lips. This was anything but. Her hands were in his dark hair, loving the feel of the silky locks between her fingers. His hands have already pulled out her cream ribbon, letting the elbow-length red waterfall cascade down her back. His hands leave the back off her head and bury themselves in the crimson mass. The pads of his fingertips massage her scalp, just as her hands leave his hair. They travel lower and start to push his shirt up, never breaking lip contact. His tongue swipes across her lips, pleading for entrance. She opens her mouth obligingly, and his tongue immediately plunges deep inside her mouth. It would be disgusting, she thinks, tracing circles on his bare stomach, if it hadn't felt so good.
"Lily!" Comes the breathy moan from the dark haired, hazel eyed boy before her. He pushes her away regretfully, and pins her against the tapestry at the side of the wall. "Lily, what does this mean for me-you- us?" Her eyes have glazed over and she looks slightly dazed, probably from lack of oxygen. Her eyes start to fill with tears.
"Oh Merlin James, this wasn't meant to happen. I shouldn't be doing this. Merlin, I'm not even meant to be here." Quick as a wink, Lily slips out from under a confused James and starts to run down the corridor, away to her dorm, away to silence, away from him.
"Lily please!" His voice starts to break and Lily feels her heart being torn. She stops, almost halfway down the corridor. He sounds like he's about to cry, and she wishes more than anything that she could make him stop. She so wants to be the one to hold him close and rock him, to smooth his hair and tell him that everything is going to be alright, to tell him that it's okay because she is never going to leave him. But she can't. She closes her eyes and breathes in shakily.
"James I am so so sorry. But I can't do this. I can't be with- I mean- do this. I just. Can't." To her horror, Lily finds tears dripping down her cheeks.
"Why not Lily? Why not us?" In those six words it seems as though everything they have ever felt towards each other: anger, resentment, hate, embarrassment, dislike, friendship, love: it all came down to those six words. Everything they have bottled up for the past six and a half years, it all came out in those six words. She turns to face him and finds that hazel as well as emerald eyes have hot tears spurting from them.
"See this is why you should never let yourself fall in love," Lily thinks, her heart feeling as though it has been shattered into millions of pieces. "Because in the end someone or everyone gets hurt. And it hurts so, so badly."
"Don't you understand James? Why can't you understand?" Lily cries, swiping a fist over her eyes. "I can't give in now. Because I let myself fall in love with you, after all these years and then- what-? Hmm? You've caught me." Lily sniffs. "You've caught the elusive Lily Evans. Well done Jamsie. And what's she to you now, huh? Just another trophy girlfriend? Another girl for you and Sirius' Prongs & Padfoot's Official Snog Chart, eh? Because I'm not your One True Love, or whatever other shit you tell the rest of the school. Nah, I won't fall for that crap. I'm sorry James but I can't take this anymore. What we just had isn't allowed James. What we just had broke all the rules there are when it comes to us. What we just had was wrong. Plain wrong. Goodbye James Potter." And with that she was gone. Out of the corridor. Out of his heart. Huh. He wished it was that easy.
Ooooooooh so whaddaya think huh? Huh? HUH?
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