Do you regret it?

Chapter 1

Gokudera Hayato is a seventeen year old, handsome teen with the shiniest silver locks that was styled oddly to resemble an octopus. They extended to his neck with some strands resting on his porcelain face. He had the most beautiful, almond-shaped, emerald eyes that glistened in irritation, hate, and distrust. His facial features enhanced his handsome face, thin nose and lips that was always set in a permanent scowl that gives him a bad-boy attitude, having boys and girls alike, fawning over his handsome good looks.

Well, enough of how handsome he is, let's get back to the story… shall we?

Gokudera walked through the streets of Sicily with his hands tucked in the pockets of his jeans, his back hunched and his face in its normal hateful scowls. He stopped and watched as he saw people interacting and smiling happily, with no problems whatsoever. He smiled sadly and continued on his way. He sighed. The town was already crowded and busy with people rushing to work, buying presents and decorations or just taking a stroll, enjoying the last clear sky before tonight. It was said to be snowing tonight.

Now, why would he be out walking? Simple. Escape the place that most people would call a Famiglia. His eyebrows creased at the word as he let out a bittersweet smile creep on his face. He couldn't and wouldn't call that- the word was spat out in distaste mentally- place as famiglia. That place could never be called a family. He didn't feel welcomed or loved at all. He felt like he was just a piece that was forever set to be controlled in a game of chess, despite him being one of the most important and strongest individual in Vongola.

That's right, the Vongola, the most notorious, influential, and strongest mafia families that existed in over four hundred years. It would have made Gokudera happy to be part of it, more so being a Guardian, but he hated it as much as he loved to leave the family, which by, mind you, quite a lot.

Gokudera was a bastard's child. His father was a mafia Don yet he was an illegitimate child to a deceased piano artist. He was scorned, neglected and despised. He was different . He was a half-breed, well more like a quarter-breed, yet none was ever born like that in the mafia. Just because he had the blood of two different nationalities, he had been scorned and hated ever since he was born.

Gokudera was never given a chance to prove himself. He was always seen as rash, violent and ill-tempered. None knew that this was his way of building a wall to protect him from insults and wrathful gazes. None knew or ever tried to get to know the real him. He wanted people to know that he was more than just a bastard's child. He was more than a brash and loud teenager. He was much more than that. He just wanted someone to accept him.

So, he built up a reputation. He learned how to use dynamites and practiced them until it became his expertise. He defeated many of mafia families that dared challenge and ridicule him by his own power. He made a name in the underground world as Smokin' Bomb Hayato. He was happy. If he was strong, maybe, just maybe, someone may finally accept him…

Yet that wasn't the case. He was still hated and rejected of a spot in a family. He didn't care if they were illegal or not, he just wanted someone to accept him but also love him like he was a part of the family. Yet every time he turned to new families, when one lands their eyes on his face that was filled with hope, rejects him immediately and crushes the little hope that glistened in his eyes. He tried and tried until he finally got accepted.

Vongola accepted him in the family, and he was ecstatic at first. He was finally going to be happy. Yet he only found out how wrong he was the second he met the new soon-to-be-boss of Vongola. He was ridiculed and insulted at first meeting yet he put up with it, finding out that his half-brother was here, made him feel hope. However, it was crushed seeing how he was treated by everyone else. Again, he was treated differently. He was back to being a bastard's child.

His half-brother, G, loved him as well as the CEDEF leader , Giotto, yet that wasn't enough. Everyone practically seethed as soon as they see him that he began to hat Vongola, as well as thinking that he'll never find his happiness…So he wanted to escape Vongola. He wanted to just stay away. He longs for someone to just love and accept him. He wanted people to see the real him and look beyond him being an illegitimate child.

Gokudera sighed as he reached a dark alleyway. He continued walking until he saw a lone can sitting on the damp and cold stone-tiled, cemented floor and picked it up. He scowled an unholy frown. The thought of even having to hear the name Vongola makes his stomach churn. He squashed the metal can between his palms and casually threw it in the dumpster. He turned to away and walked out of the alleyway… of course not before bumping into someone. "Watch where ya goin', ya brat!" shouted a gruff and haughty voice.

Gokudera glared as the person, the leader, he presumed, scowled at him. Suddenly, a split-eating grin stretched across that scar-filled face. "Well, since ya injured me… you need to pay for the hospital bills!" he mocked as his lackeys laughed together with him, bending over like what he said was the funniest thing on earth.

'No maiming… No maiming… No maiming' thought Gokudera as he settled for insulting the ugly looking, wannabe Mafioso. "Why don't you watch where you're going, fucker!... And I never knew you were so weak! Getting injured because someone bumped into you! Pathetic weakling!" shouted Gokudera as he glared at them rebelliously and tucked his arms back into his pants.

The leader blushed in embarrassment but quickly regained his posture and glared wrathfully at Gokudera. "What the fuck did you say!?" he growled as he towered above Gokudera together with his lackeys. " Wow!" exclaimed Gokudera in fake awe. "I never knew you were deaf as well! That's amazing! Weak and deaf!" stated Gokudera sarcastically. He didn't feel threatened at all. Compared to the mafia he fought, these wannabes were just a speck of dust. They don't even compare to him.

The leader snapped his head as he grabbed Gokudera by the throat and lifted him up. Said silver-haired boy acted to be in pain and was wheezing. Gokudera wrapped his hands around the leader's tan and muscled arm trying to pry it off his throat. The leader leaned in and looked at Gokudera in the eye, watching those emerald-green eyes flash in pain. "Listen here" he growled as his voice went an octave lower. "You better watch your words… you never know what kind of people you meet" he said as he turned around to face his lackeys. "Right guys?" he asked with an ugly smile. Said lackeys nodded in agreement. "Right, boss!" said lackey number one. "You are fucked dude! That's what you get for insulting boss!" followed lackey number two as they both began to laugh. The said boss had a sudden boost of confidence as he began to laugh with them, momentarily forgetting Gokudera.

Gokudera watched this interaction with amusement hidden in his eyes. It's not like his weak, but this was his orders. He couldn't attack normal civilians, no matter how much they pretend to be in the mafia. He has a lot of experience and he can differentiate real mafia and fake mafia. These people were fake. Yet that doesn't mean he can't feel pain, NO. He can fell the air being forcefully taken out of his lungs with his throat burning like it was on fire. His eyes were beginning to become blurry as a poll of tears began collecting in his eyes. He needed air and he needed it right now.

So, he did what the first thing that popped up in his mind. Kick the guy where it hurts, HARD. He swung his left knee and kneed the leader in his groin. Said leader dropped Gokudera unceremoniously onto the ground as he began clutching his dear groin, his lackeys running up to the fallen leader who looked to be in great agony, leaving Gokudera on his hands and knees as he clutched his chest and forcefully breathed in air. 'Sweet air!' he thought.

Gokudera looked from the corner of his eyes and saw the leader finally gaining the sense back in his private area-that he needed to have babies, which I doubt, will never happen- and stood up with the help of his lackeys. He glared at his lackeys as he punched both of them in the stomach, both landing with a thud and clutching their stomachs, coughing out some blood as well. "If this ever comes out, I'll kill both of you… Understand?" he growled as the lackeys nodded fearfully. He turned to Gokudera and said in a voice that was trying to be intimidating but sounded like ha had diarrhea. "That's the last straw kid… you are dead." He said as he raised his fists, but momentarily stopped and turned towards his lackeys and kicked them. "What are you waiting for!? Stand up and kick his ass!" he shouted as both lackeys stood up and advanced towards Gokudera with both fists raised.

Gokudera sighed. There was no way out of this. He shrugged mentally. Well, he'll just agitate them more then. If he was going to get beaten up, then he'll insult them more. "N-Never… k-knew…y-you…w-were..ugly…a-as…w-well, b-baldy" he wheezed. He wasn't thoroughly back to his senses after being choked. So he smiled a bitter smile as he felt a fist connect with his face.

xxXX00O00XXxx

Three figures stepped out of the alleyway, looking smug like they had just won the lottery. Gokudera watched as the three left him on the dark alleyway, bleeding, bruised and beaten. He looked back to see if they were completely gone before trying to stand up, using the building wall as support. But a sharp pain caused him to fall down on his stomach. He was now facing the colorful street that was decorated with variety of colored lights. A giant tree placed at the very middle of the street with people gathering around and singing merrily, snow falling down on his bloodied figure.

He laughed humorlessly. He was going to die today. With the frosty snow falling on him and his injuries getting worse by the minute, he wouldn't be surprised if his system just breaks down. He was already feeling his breathing getting worse as he winced at every sharp pain caused by him trying to breath. He watched was blurry images of people looked at him in pity, but not trying to help him. They were all fake. Everyone was just fake. They already saw him in agony yet none tried to help.

He smiled bitterly as he looked up the midnight sky that was glistening with pure, white stars. Yeah, he'll just die. After all, no one will miss him. He was just a bastard's child and a nobody. Sleep sounded good. A sleep in which he will never wake up. Yeah, he'll do just that.

Gokudera felt his eyes getting heavier yet didn't fight the sleepiness that was washing over him. But before he could fully closed his eyes, he saw a figure running towards him and felt warm and comforting arms surround his body.

END