Here it is everyone. The big finale! It's kind of a relief that I got to this point, I've been running out of energy for this story. It's bad, I know. But I will continue making stories in this new universe that I have dubbed the "Humorverse." Unfortunately, there won't be any more of these humor-based stories for a while now. I plan on working on another story I want to get off the ground before I forget.
Thank you all for favoring, following, and reviewing this tale as it gave me great hopes and kept me going in the long run.
Also a special thanks to Niom Lamboise, ProtectorKori, as well as anakinlove for their advice and help. Kudos to you three for your suggestions and adding your ideas or thoughts onto .net. Now for the funny conclusion...
Added January 1st, 2015: Just fixing some errors I saw, nothing more.
Disclaimer: All Rights To Young Justice Belong To DC Comics and Cartoon Network
Chapter Eighteen: Busted!
"Recognize Superman 01. Batman 02. Wonder Woman 03. Flash 04. Aquaman 06. Martian Manhunter 07. Green Arrow 08. Zatara 11. Black Canary 13. Robin B02. Superboy B04. Lois Lane, reporter for Daily Planet. Alfred Pennyworth, former member in British Secret Service."
The Team watched in horror as the Zeta-tube in the Cave turned on and revealed all people mentioned by the feminine voice. Their horror was only amplified when they saw Superboy and Robin being led forward with looks of shame. A tall, young woman and an elderly man also shared the same look as well. And every other person coming in looked pissed! Even Batman couldn't look that scary even if he tried; speaking of which, he was for the first time ever seen without his cowl completely on. It was as if he was too distracted to even get himself ready accordingly. Superman seemed to have put on his cape the wrong was as it covered his chest like a tunic, but he didn't seem to care at the moment.
Wally tried to hide behind Artemis, only to have the female archer push him away. Although the shove was a tad too strong even for her as the young Speedster found himself standing right in front of the Dark Knight himself. One Bat-glare sent Wally scurrying behind his teammates again, with more shelter this time.
"Team," Batman grinned evilly at the teenagers, "Thank you for coming to the Cave this evening despite your 'conflicting' schedules."
For a moment, M'gan let herself sigh with relief before she heard the man say, "It saved us a great deal of trouble of finding you. For that, I thank you." The young Martian started sweating again. Conner wished nothing more than to place his hand around hers and give comfort...the one time Superman actually stays with the young Kryptonian for more than three minutes! Oh the irony!
"Well...Batman," Wally spoke up bravely, "What do we owe the honor of your company...and that of the rest of our mentors?"
"I am certain you already know the answer to that question, Wallace," Martian Manhunter spoke calmly, "Do you wish to know what we have been doing these past several hours?"
When none of the young heroes spoke, Black Canary stepped in, "Recovering other League members who were sadly too incapacitated to come here this evening. Not to mention recovering from...certain assaults." As she said this, Black Canary and Green Arrow looked at the old man and young woman, both who then started chuckling nervously.
"Could any of you enlighten the League as to what has been going on?" Batman questioned in a deadly whisper.
"Well Bats," Wally chuckled nervously, "The thing is, um, we don't understand-"
"Kaldur, as team leader, I think you should set the right example for everyone and tell me the whole story," the Dark Knight looked at the Atlantean more maliciously than anyone had ever seen before. And for the first time ever, Aqualad felt terrified beyond reason.
Whatever you do. M'gan warned Aqualad. Do not let Batman get even a hint about the You-Know-What!
A You-Know-What you say? This sounds interesting for your report. Tell me more... The Team never thought Batman could get inside their heads!
M'gan! You let him in the mind-link?! Artemis's voice bounced around everyone's heads like a hammer to an anvil.
Along with the rest of us. Martian Manhunter replied in his calm voice. Didn't change the fact that the Team was screwed now.
I just asked you a question, Miss Martian. Batman growled. And I am waiting. Do you know. What. Is. Going. On.
M'gan couldn't speak. Her legs were trembling. It was all she could do to not break down for the second time this month in front of the World's Greatest Detective.
I would also like to know where Red Tornado is. Batman added. Considering how he is responsible for your safety.
If we said that he was charging his batteries, would you believe me? Wally tried coming to M'gan's rescue with that statement, only to be shot down by a Bat-glare to the face.
No. Batman responded. Because I wasn't asking you and Red Tornado doesn't run on batteries. Miss Martian, answer the question and do not agree with Kid Flash's statement. I know you're smart enough to do that.
Well. M'gan kept her voice steady. Red Tornado...had his systems...jammed and we didn't go near him in fear of making things worse...not to mention Robin wasn't around to give us his technical two-cents.
Aqualad stepped forward, "If I may speak, I would like to say something to my Team. But first, release Robin and Superboy immediately."
"You are in no position to negotiate with us," Batman growled.
"This is no negotiation," Aqualad insisted, "I feel as though they should be able to hear me out freely. I assure you that I will keep them under control." Batman relented and nodded towards Superman and Flash, who were restraining the other two young heroes. As soon as Robin and Superboy felt the tight grips around their shoulders relinquish, Aqualad screamed,
"EVERY MAN FOR HIMSELF!" And with that, the Team fled all over the Cave with the Justice League hot on their tail. Alfred and Lois were left behind with Wonder Woman, who kept them in place with her magic lasso.
Flash chased after Artemis and Wally, who fled into the library.
"We need to think of something and fast," Artemis whispered as Flash came closer and closer to their hiding spot near an air vent. Without warning, Wally grabbed Artemis's face and pressed his lips against hers, ignoring the muffled cries of protest from the archer. As Flash made himself known to the two, he gasped in horror at the scene before him. Seeing the older Speedster's reaction, Artemis stopped resisting and started making realistic moans of pleasure.
"No, not again!" Flash cried, "Please Wally, how does this make sense? You HATE her!"
Wally began to unbutton his shirt while Artemis continued to press her lips on his neck as well. With his bare chest exposed, Wally gave Artemis a look that she somehow understood. As she started fingering at her own shirt, Flash screamed his head off and ran out of the room. When both teens were certain that Flash had left them completely, Artemis roughly pushed herself off of Wally and leaned back against a wall for support.
"That felt disgusting!" She declared as she wiped her face fiercely as if she was removing a terrible germ.
"You're telling me," Wally moaned, "You're not the one who feels like he's gonna lose his lunch."
"Hey, they were just putting on an act!" Damn it, Ollie. How did he find them?
"And here I thought they'd be a cute couple," Black Canary sighed, coming out of the shadows, "Guess I was wrong."
At that moment, Flash zoomed back in front of the two and shouted victoriously, "I knew it was all fake! I was also putting on an act."
Right as he said this however, Wally relieved his stomach of anything he had eaten in the past hour, making the older Speedster tremble in horror as he felt half-eaten pizza and peanut butter all over his body before slowly charging towards his nephew.
"I DON'T WANT TO DIE!" Wally screamed and proceeded to dash against the wall and managed to break through the solid concrete, leaving only an imprint of his body on the wall. This victory was short lived, however, as he collapsed onto the ground moaning more than ever.
"I surrender," Artemis sighed as she put her hands up, only to pull out her bow and begin shooting, "Not!"
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Alfred looked at his captor, trying to convey a sense of pity within the Amazon warrior. Unfortunately for him, it seems as if only Master Richard and Master Conner are the only ones capable of the puppy-eye trick. Lois sighed next to him and tried to find a nail file in her pocket. Batman somehow always missed one tool whenever he confiscated any "weapons" from her or Richard during their misadventures.
"I'd stop fidgeting if I were you, Miss Lane," Wonder Woman warned the reporter, "You're wasting your time. My lasso cannot be broken by mere pocket-book accessories."
"Excuse me, madam," Alfred looked up at Wonder Woman pleadingly, "Could you loosen this rope around us, please? I am not as young as I used to be."
"I am not as gullible as some people take me for, old man," Wonder Woman huffed, "It's partly because of you that I had Bruce and Clark breathing down my neck for several days like a bunch of perverts."
"Welcome to my world," Lois grumbled. Alfred and Wonder Woman glared at her in annoyance.
"Please madam," Alfred begged, "I can't-cough, cough-have any doubts right now. Cough, cough-please, show some compassion Miss Diana."
At the mention of her name, Wonder Woman looked at the butler with pity before bending over and loosening the rope only a little. But that was all the majordomo needed to slip out and put the Amazon in his position. Lois slipped out of the rope as well before assisting Alfred with ensuring that the rope stayed firm.
"Masters Bruce and Clark went off in that direction," Alfred pointed towards the hanger, "We must intercept them and help the rest of the youngsters."
While Alfred ran as fast as he could towards the hanger, Lois lingered around a little before dropping a single nail file at the Amazon's feet.
"In case you want to test out your 'accessories' theory," Lois grinned before running off.
Men! Even when they seem old, they still trick others around them.
XXXXXXXXXXXX
M'gan and Zatanna did everything they could to keep their mentors away from them. M'gan kept on throwing chairs and anything else that wasn't nailed down towards her uncle, who merely brushed them aside with his mind. Meanwhile, Zatanna seemed to be having a reverse verbal argument with her father, who finally cleared his throat with a little water, and unleashed all that she had learned over the years and more. Zatara struggled to keep up with his frustrated daughter, seeing that most of her motivation must have originated from his overprotective behavior in terms of her chances of being on the Team.
"Ecnad," Zatanna chanted, causing Zatara's feet to move in a strange rhythm against their will.
"Esaec gnicnad," Zatara countered, freeing his feet from the spell.
"Pals flesruoy," Zatanna shouted. Her father's cheeks soon turned a bright-red, now that he was at the mercy of his own two hands.
"Sorry," M'gan apologized as she threw another chair at her uncle. He stopped it in its tracks before actually doing something with it and using his powers to push the object towards his niece. M'gan channeled her mind on the chair and began pushing it towards her uncle again.
Stops.
Towards M'gan.
Stops.
Towards Martian Manhunter.
Stops.
Towards M'gan.
Stops.
Towards Martian Manhunter.
Sto-
BOOM!
The force of the explosion pushed both Martians back and proceeded to knock them out simultaneously. When father and daughter saw the result of the battle beside them, they both pulled out a white flag and waved them in surrender.
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"Kaldur'ahm," Aquman pleaded as he chased his partner through the kitchen, "Please reconsider opposing the League. We do not wish to harm you."
"It was you along with the League that rejected me and my friends full membership into the Justice League," Aqulad growled as he unleashed a barrage of water tentacles from his water-bearers against his mentor, "You lied to us! I consider this justice to an unforgivable crime!"
"I always told you that everything happens for a reason," Aquaman tried reasoning with his student as he dodged each attack, "Because of the rejection, you formed a team of your own."
"So you do not deny the accusations?" Aqualad insisted as he kept the attack going.
"That is not what I meant," Aquaman got close enough to Aqualad that he could disarm the boy before anymore damage could occur, "Is there anything else you'd like to try?"
"Think fast," Aqualad said as he threw an open bag of chips at his king. As the snacks fell to the floor, Aquaman looked at his student with confusion.
"Is this your trump card?" He asked his student, "Mere snacks?"
"Wait for it," Aqualad grinned. Several seconds later, the ground beneath them began to tremble slightly. Aquaman looked all around him for an explanation, but his answer came to him when he saw black creatures coming towards him with sharp teeth. As they began attacking the man, Aquaman did the most natural thing a hero would do in a time like this...scream.
"Courtesy of Conner," Aqualad grinned, "It is because of him that this was possible." His satisfaction was short-lived, however, as the moles starting making their way towards him too...
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Robin never thought he'd find himself cornered after several minutes of running. It was embarrassing, really. But considering that their pursuers were the World's Greatest Detective and a guy who could see through almost anything, maybe he and Conner were lucky that it took several minutes instead of just one. Batman and Superman were just toying with them now, standing in place while their proteges kept backing further and further against the wall.
"I knew you two were behind all of those pranks," Batman growled triumphantly, "But I still don't understand why I had to be a victim too!"
"Bruce!" Superman cried indignantly.
"Face it, Kent," Batman barked, "You've had this coming for a long time."
"Around four months actually," Robin corrected.
"Whatever," Batman continued before glaring back at the Man of Steel, "Considering your behavior around Conner, I'd say this was the only thing that could have come out of it. But why me?!" This last question was directed towards his son now.
"Why not?" Robin smirked, "Someone needs to knock you off your high horse!" Batman finally had it and began marching towards the two teens.
"Now what?" Robin sighed, "We never made a Plan B."
"I did!" Conner yelled as he pounced on the Dark Knight and proceeded to pin the man in place.
He leaned into Batman's face for a few moments when Robin cried out, "Dude! You can't kiss my dad! You're underage and he's practically your uncle. That's a double no-no, man!"
"What're talking about?" Conner frowned. He pulled the older man to his feet, "I wasn't going to try the 'memory kiss thing' again. That's gross."
"So what was Plan B, then?" Robin insisted, "Surrendering?"
"More like a compromise," Batman grinned. Superman's mouth dropped when he heard this. Just then, two arms snaked their way around the Man of Steel's neck and held him in a grip.
"You wouldn't hurt a girl, would you?" Lois whispered into Superman's ear when he began to struggle.
"It's alright, Lois," Batman reassured the reporter, "I've decided to call a ceasefire. That means no shooting is necessary, Alfred."
"And here I thought I'd have something to put on my mantle this time," the old butler groaned.
Batman pulled his communicator our of his utility belt and spoke into it, "Team and Justice League members. Report to the main hall for a talk."
He then grinned at his son, "Come on, son. I think it's time we all had a chat together."
XXXXXXXXXXX
It didn't take long to get everyone together, not to mention getting rid of the moles again to reveal an injured Aquaman and Aqualad underneath. Cleaning up Kid Flash and Flash however, proved to be a bit more disgusting. It was when everyone started expressing a lot of frustrations, that Batman decided to come up with a solution.
"I understand that we have all been treating you like second-class heroes, or worse these past few weeks. And I apologize, especially to you, Miss Martian. I was wrong to make you cry like that," Batman sounded truly regretful towards the end as he directed his words at M'gan, who then smiled weakly in repsone, "However, there must be a more positive way we can deal with these problems. That is why Black Canary is our therapist. If there are any problems you'd like to discuss, just talk to her and she can set up an appointment with you and the person you are having problems with. I've decided to let you all off the hook for now, but if this happens again, there will be consequences. Dismissed."
As League members and young heroes alike began to reconcile and apologize, Conner was left alone with Superman. Now the real battle began...
"I should have never been such a...jackass to you, Conner," Superman, now speaking as Clark, began, "I'm so sorry."
"Same here," Conner admitted, "Guess there is such thing as taking a joke too far."
"How about this?" Clark suggested, "I see you here once a week; we talk, train a little, maybe I help you with schoolwork if you need it, and we'll work our way from there."
"Sounds like a plan," Conner grinned. The grin grew wider as Clark placed a gentle hand on the young Krytonian's shoulder.
"I really hate to leave you, Conner," Clark started to frown. When he saw his clo-ah screw it, his son's face fall a little, Clark added, "I'm serious! I just want to let my Ma and Pa know that they'll see you more often. See you tomorrow, then?"
Conner's grin returned, "Deal." For the first time ever, Superman flew off, yet Conner didn't feel sad at all. He knew that his dad would see him again soon.
"Come along, Master Richard," Alfred sighed, "We must get you in bed now. Perhaps Master Conner would like to join us again?"
Conner looked at Batman, who nodded in reply. Without thinking, Conner went up to Robin and hugged him. Taken aback from this display of affection, Robin decided to return the embrace, getting more and more used to having a cousin again. If only John were here to see this...
"Wait," Wally spoke up, "Why's Bats letting us off the hook?"
Lois grinned, "Conner struck a deal. If Bruce and the League left you all alone, then Conner would give him something important in return."
"Been meaning to give it back for a while now," Conner admitted, "Hey Richard, race you to the Zeta-tubes!"
"You're on!" Dick started pelting off with Conner close behind him.
"So..what was the important thing?" Aqualad asked the Dark Knight.
"What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas," Batman replied in a deadpan tone.
XXXXXXXXXXXX
Clark almost had a heart attack when he saw what was on his desk around 5 pm the next day. He actually forgot about it with all that's been happening, thank God it was on his desk instead of online. There was even a note attached to it:
Clark,
Just wanted to give this back to you as a sign of goodwill. Conner found this on the floor of the Metropolis Bank and thought it would be safer in your possession. I'll still be keeping a close eye on you, though. If you screw up again, then you'll find this on Facebook. See you later.
Bats
P.S.
Don't worry about the gossip. They'll lose interest before the week is out, I made sure of it.
The bathrobe photo now seemed like nothing compared to what happened these past few weeks now. Clark stuffed the photo and the note safely in his front pocket and proceeded to gather all of his stuff together. He and Lois were supposed to meet Conner at Happy Harbor in thirty minutes. As long as there were no moles or stupid gossip, he'd be fine.
The End
That's it everyone. To anyone that's curious, my next story is going to be Dynamic, since it's been something I want to get back to now that this is done. If you want more stories connected to this one, just reply in the comments. Please review and thank you again for your support. Happy Readings! Happy New Year too!