Disclaimer: Dogbertcarroll is evil… He dropped me into the game. Neither of us own any intellectual property other than our stories. We are sharing with you a heaping helping of crazy.

Charles slowly awakened to a black featureless plane aside from three glowing screens, and in his best William Shatner impression he yelled. "JOHN!" Standing he noticed that he was in nothing but boxers and walked over to the screens curiously. The screen on the left was in Japanese which fortunately he read and spoke so he could tell it said "Ninja Nookie - Game Start" the screen directly in front of him said "Hellmouth High - Game Start" and the screen to the right read "Wizarding World - Game Start".

Chuckling and shaking his head Charles muttered. "Thanks John… this should be fun." Charles reached over and tapped the Ninja Nookie tab and scrolled straight past Naruto's character and continued onward until he found Kiba. "Load Avatar."

Charles hit his knees and grabbed his forehead as the life and skills of an 11 year old Kiba impacted his frontal lobe with fairly intense force and sharp claws. Standing up he grabbed his head, noticing his nails and cursing up a storm as he accidentally stabbed himself in the scalp with Kiba's transformed clawed hands. "Stats!" he ordered roughly in a voice recognizably not his own, in a body that was definitely shorter and lighter than his own muscled 6'2" frame. "Kiba is a damn shrimp…"

Revealed before his eyes were Kiba's stats…

Kiba Inuzuka

Level 1

Hit Points: 390 / 390 (50/level, +10 per point of Vitality)

Chakra Points: 200 / 200 (50/level, +10 times average of Intelligence, Vitality and Wisdom)

Strength 14

Dexterity 12

Vitality 34

Intelligence 08

Wisdom 05

Charisma 10

Luck 12

"Shit!" Charles muttered, glaring darkly at Kiba's poor mental scores. "This is … gonna be a problem." he muttered and pulled up the Merits and Flaws section of his sheet.

Inuzuka Clan: Child of the main family … blah … blah… blah. Charles flipped that screen.

Spirit of the Wild: Allows speech with animals and enhanced physical stats/senses.

Short-Tempered: Charles ignored the short tempered blurb because frankly it was obvious.

Impulsive: As was impulsive, he was really going to have to buy those two down to quirk level or buy them off.

Grumbling Charles checked the amount of points he had available to work with. "Ten points to spend here…" he flipped through the various pages. "Okay… I want Ambidextrous, Double Jointed and Photographic Reflexes…" He selected each of these muttering darkly when it cost six points to grab them all and flipped to the Flaws page.

"Okay, I'll take some fanon cliches here… Horndog gives 4 points for Minor and 10 points for Major… Kiba is 12 and his mom and sister may or may not beat it out of him, plus he's a ninja and has a life expectancy that isn't so high… Plus Jiraiya is cool." Charles selected Major Horndog as a flaw so he had more points to work with.

He spent two points buying off short tempered and impulsive leaving him with 12 points to play with. "Hmmm… five points to enhance the Inuzuka Bloodline…"

Enhanced Inuzuka Bloodline: Many years of immersion in wild chakra have reduced the costs of Clan and related jutsu by 50%, +2 to each stat enhanced by bloodline. Perception increases as the mind forms new paths to deal with the additional information more efficiently than normal. This trait increases the bonds between companion animals.

Charles immediately purchased the ability and watched as Kiba's Strength, Dexterity, Vitality and Intelligence went up by two and blinking tapped the Intelligence attribute and noticed that Perception was a derived attribute and it was at 15. "Okay; evidently that bonus to perception was 5 points. That was definitely worth the five points."

He grabbed photographic memory to further enhance his photographic reflexes, costing him an additional point… "What's this?" Charles murmured and clicked on the Wisdom of the Wild merit.

Wisdom of the Wild: The art of survival teaches many lessons. +2 Wisdom per level.

Charles blinked then grinned wickedly and purchased that 4 point merit. "Two points left, I'll take Efficient Chakra Use."

Efficient Chakra Use: Energy expended for techniques reduced by 10%.

Charles grinned and looked around the greyed out soundless world to see where precisely he was before he unpaused the game. "Unpause!"

The sounds of Iruka's lecture suddenly slammed into his ears and he winced hard and curled around Akamaru, reflexively squeezing Akamaru a bit causing him to yelp.

"Kiba?" Iruka asked tentatively as his Inuzuka student winced and squeezed his ninken, stealthily padding over to where Kiba and Naruto were sitting.

Naruto blinked and turned to look at his friend and his dog, reaching over to squeeze his shoulder.

Charles meanwhile was being bombarded with far more sensory information than he was used to, massaging his temples. "I'm okay sensei, just … give me a minute."

Iruka knelt so he was at eye level with Kiba, whose eyes were a trifle glazed and glassy. "What's going on?" he asked softly in a voice that only carried to the two boys.

"I think it's something to do with my bloodline…" Kiba replied, rubbing his eyes and ears. "Suddenly everything is louder and scents are stronger and my eyes are better even…"

Iruka turned to look at Naruto, "Take Kiba to his sister Hana; she's a medic nin and should know if this is a secondary stage of their bloodline or if something is wrong. Tsume is currently out of the village."

Naruto nodded rapidly then suddenly had a Eureka moment and whipped out a small plastic case from a pouch and poked Kiba in the shoulder and pointed at it. 'Nose and Ear plugs!' he mouthed enthusiastically to Kiba.

Kiba grinned back weakly and accepted the plugs, and after making sure they were clean slowly inserted both sets of items. Iruka meanwhile was glaring dubiously at Naruto before shaking his head and pulled a pair of sunglasses out of his pocket and offered them to Kiba. "Here, these may help as well."

Naruto grabbed Akamaru and sat him on his head who yapped softly and licked his nose then slid under one of Kiba's arms and lifted his friend up and helped the two out of the room. Ino spoke up as they left, "Is Kiba going to be okay sensei?"

"I'm not a medic nin Ino; however he seemed confident that this was bloodline related." Iruka responded and gently patted her on the shoulder as he returned to the front of the class.

Charles meanwhile was very glad of the muting effects the protective equipment had on his senses and shambled along with Naruto's support, Akamaru having climbed down from Naruto's head was tucked into the hood of his jacket and a comforting warmth against the back of his neck.

Naruto lead his friend through the back alleys and quick paths he often used for his pranks and soon had the pair at Hana's clinic. Pushing open the door he called in quietly but with some urgency, "Hana!"

A torrent of barking greeted his call and Hana came to see what her brother's sometimes annoying, often hyperactive friend wanted. Kiba just winced as the barking definitely didn't help his headache. Her ninken rushed to Kiba and snuffled at him, receiving scratches in return as they whined worriedly.

"Naruto, what happened?" Hana asked as she closed the door, thankfully muffling the barking.

"Kiba said all his senses were suddenly stronger." Naruto replied, slipping out from under Kiba's arm as the Haimaru triplets pushed him out of the way.

Hana gently tilted Kiba's head back and pulled the sunglasses down to see his eyes which were glassy and slightly unfocused. "Owww…" Kiba groaned at the increase in light.

"How do you feel?" Hana asked as she scratched his scalp gently while discretely using medical ninjutsu to make sure he hadn't gotten some sort of head injury.

"Everything is too bright, too loud and smells way too much…" Charles did his best not to whine as she continued; her fingers on his scalp really felt good though.

"Thanks for bringing him Naruto, I think some rest and time for him to relax will help a lot - there's nothing wrong with the gaki." Hana said, turning to grin at Naruto who'd watched the whole thing with worried eyes. "Kiba should be back in class in a day or so; his balls dropped is all."

"Don't tell him that! My bloodline matured…"

Naruto was obviously biting his lip and trying to hold in laughter, "Balls dropped; right… I'll be sure to let Iruka know…"

"Why couldn't I be dying?" Kiba whined as Naruto took off, bursting into raucous laughter as the door closed behind him. "You know, I've heard medic nins were supposed to comfort their patients?"

Hana laughed and ruffled his hair and led him back through the clinic and into the clan compound. "Blowing smoke up someone's behind has never done anyone any good runt."

Charles found himself stuffed into his bedroom and lying down with a soft furry puppy worriedly looking down into his face. "Yeah Akamaru I'm fine," he said reaching up to scratch the puppy's ears.

Akamaru responded with a soft bark and curled up on the pillow beside his head. Charles meanwhile examined the room which was done up in dark colors and adorned with a few furs that his Kiba memories told him were from animals he'd successfully hunted. Ninja tools and a scroll rack were the only other decorations in the place.

As much as it hurt he wasn't just going to lay here and waste time so he dimmed the lights and pulled out one of the scrolls that detailed the stuff required by the academy.

Twelve Very Uncomfortable Hours of Studying Later…

Kiba raised an eyebrow as Hana opened the door, "Hi runt how're you feeling?"

"Like all my senses aren't going haywire anymore," Kiba replied softly with a grin up at her as a delicious smell wafted in through the open door behind her. "Where's the food?" he asked eagerly.

Hana chuckled, "If you're hungry that means your nose at least isn't feeding you more information than you can handle anymore. This many rich scents would make you nauseous if it was still bothering you." she said as she stepped outside and returned with a covered tray and a pot of tea.

Kiba grinned back at her. "That's mean, tempting me with food when it could make me want to puke." He happily yanked open the container revealing succulent chunks of seasoned steak one of which he happily popped into his mouth and tossed another to Akamaru who barked happily.

Hana chuckled. "Give me some credit, you aren't nauseous obviously; or you wouldn't be happily doing a vacuum impression on that beef. Slow down so you can taste it would you?"

Charles smiled back at her, a mouth full of juicy beef staining his teeth.

Hana laughed and reached over to ruffle his hair, causing him to lean into her fingers as she scratched gently. "Heh, you're worse than Akamaru."

"Am not, everybody likes being petted." Charles huffed with a grin at her, "when is mom due back from her mission?"

"In another week probably," Hana replied thoughtfully, "she's on long range patrol again with her team along the border with Iwa."

Kiba continued eating, though he did slow down some and fed Akamaru his fill from the tray also before relaxing back onto his bed with a grin up at her. "Want to get some training in?" he asked Hana hopefully.

A pop-up informed him that his wisdom had increased by 1.

"You sure you're up to it?" Hana asked curiously.

"Sure!" Charles replied enthusiastically, grabbing Akamaru and setting him atop his head. Akamaru barked his agreement happily enough as well.

Hana chuckled and grinned at the two of them. "What type of training do you want runt?"

"Ninja training," Kiba replied as if it was that was the most obvious answer in the world.

"Dodging practice it is." Hana said with a smirk.

Kiba sighed and joined her outside in the clan's practice area, watching her carefully as she gathered up blunted training kunai and began tossing them at him only to return the favor; throwing his own at her and mimicking her dodging technique.

Hana barked out a laugh and grinned playfully at her little brother. "Okay funny guy lets get serious." she dropped into the signature form of the clan's Jujin Taijutsu and charged him.

The brawl that ensued was definitely a losing proposition for Kiba but as he panted on the ground he realized he'd certainly learned a lot when he finally had time to focus on all the pop-ups in front of him.

Hana walked over and knelt next to him. "You did a great job runt," she said as she gently tousled his hair and began to heal him using medical techniques. "You really surprised me with how skilled you are. I guess you've been practicing a lot huh?"

Kiba panted and grinned back at her. "Yeah, I've been training a lot! Mom is scary when she doesn't think we've applied ourselves."

Hana chuckled and nodded then helped him up. "Ready to go back inside?"

He nodded and hugged her before strolling back to his room with Akamaru.

Charles flopped onto the bed, scratching his snoozing puppy as he went through the pop-ups.

Strength, Dexterity and Vitality had all went up. Strength went up by a point leaving him at 15, Dexterity had went up a whopping 5 points, and Vitality had gained two points… Skills was where his gains really shined however.

Jujin Taijutsu was up to an immense 42 points from it's starting level of 23. Kunai skills had went up from his initial 26 to 35, Dodge had increased from it's initial 18 to 56 - he'd learned very quickly that dodging his sister's attacks was much better than being hit by them.

"Photographic Reflexes was one of the best damn things I could have bought." Charles mused thoughtfully as he picked up Akamaru and wandered into the clan library, having dealt with the popups in privacy. He currently had ten points to spend from the two levels he'd gained in the gruelling full contact spar with his sister the medic-nin. "Pause."

"Stats"

His updated stats filled the screen in front of him.

Kiba Inuzuka

Level: 3

Hit Points: 510/510 (50/level, +10 per point of Vitality)

Chakra Points: 350/350 (50/level, +10 times average of Intelligence, Vitality and Wisdom)

Strength 15

Dexterity 17

Vitality 36

Intelligence 13

~Perception 18

Wisdom 11

Charisma 10

Luck 12

Merits / Flaws: Ambidextrous, Double-Jointed, Photographic Memory/Reflexes, Enhanced Inuzuka Bloodline, Efficient Chakra Use, Spirit of the Wild, Wisdom of the Wild, Major Horndog.

After examining his sheet Charles dropped 5 points into Charisma and 3 points into luck bringing them both up to 15. leaving him with two points which he dropped into Intelligence to bring it up to 15 from the 13 it was he'd gotten going over the Academy Scrolls Kiba had accumulated thus far.

Off to one side of his character sheet were glowing tabs marked Quests and another marked Dungeons. With a grin Charles selected Quests.

"Quests Currently Available to Kiba"

Help Naruto with a prank. Reward +10 Reputation with Naruto; bonuses to traps, sneak and fast talk.

Help Hana with the kennels. Reward +10 Reputation with Hana; bonuses to animal affinity, +1 Strength.

Clan Mission

"Dungeons Currently Available to Kiba"

Academy Training Yard.

Inuzuka Training Grounds.

Forest of Death.

Charles blinked and shrugged then unpaused the game in a rush of color and headed over to the section the clan used to store the scrolls of their clan techniques as well as the techniques from which the clan techniques derived. Looking through them Charles selected the scroll that described the Shadow Clone technique.

"Title Awarded: Chester Cheetah, you have plundered the cheese and cliche cheese at that; still we'd have to give you negatives to your intelligence if you hadn't."

Charles chuckled and made sure to memorize the technique; deciding not to copy it out for Naruto and just teach him instead of enduring the lesson in frustration.

"Wisdom +1"

He also went through and studied each of the clan techniques; he and Akamaru wouldn't be able to use some of them just yet but at least he'd have them memorized for when he could. "Save Game, Slot One."

"Game Saved, Slot One."

Focusing a bit he did the requisite seal and popped out a Kage Bunshin then checked his Chakra use.

Thanks to his merits, instead of cutting his chakra points in half the kage bunshin had only cost him 72 points. He manfully bit his lip to avoid cackling madly. The Taiju Kage Bunshin might well be in his reach if he really wanted it.

Akamaru nipped him firmly. "Oww!"

"Why did you do that?"

Akamaru gave him a pointed look and shook his head from side to side in scolding fashion. His clone raised an eyebrow. "So, what do you want me to do?"

"Go teach Naruto how to use Shadow Clones… Try not to get popped but help him with his pranks if you want to… See if you can interest him in training in Tree Walking; and use a Henge when you're around anyone who might notice I don't want Hana knowing we're in multiple places at once."

His clone chortled. "You really want me to inflict a Naruto with the knowledge of Shadow Clones and Tree Walking on the unsuspecting populace of Konoha months before the Genin Exams at the Academy?"

"You didn't even have to ask; you knew the answer already." Charles replied and his clone laughed and changed shape into a random Inuzuka clansman before running off.

Charles headed to help Hana deal with the dogs in the kennels; the bonuses to strength and animal affinity would come in handy.

1 ½ Hour later…

Kiba blinked as he got the memories from his clone; Naruto had been successful in learning the Shadow Clone, and was currently working on tree walking with two dozen clones and had some terrorizing people with pranks.

A number of pop-ups appeared.

"Increased relationship with Naruto by teaching him the Shadow Clone technique; status increased to Revered."

"You have taught Naruto the Tree Walking technique to help his chakra control, you've also pointed out it's pranking potential, reputation increased with Naruto +25."

"Quest Complete: Help Naruto with a Prank. Fast Talk increased by 2, Sneak increased by 12, Traps increased by 18, reputation increased with Naruto +10."

Hana reached over and ruffled his hair. "What is that evil look of yours about?"

Kiba smiled innocently at his sister. "What evil look? I've been helping you; you're my alibi."

Hana growled and put him in a headlock, proceeding to give him a noogie. " . ?"

"How could I do anything when I'm standing right here with you?" Kiba yelped.

"One, you got a smirk on your face that brushing dogs doesn't give anyone. Two, you're suddenly very pleased with yourself and finally I can smell the lie." Hana continued and gently scratched his scalp, something that Kiba really liked and usually helped in persuading her rowdy little brother.

Charles sighed and leaned back firmly against her. "Oh wise sister, impart to me your knowledge!"

"Nice try runt; now, what is it you did?"

"I finally got the shadow clone down well enough to send one to help Naruto with his pranks?" Kiba replied honestly.

"You sent a Shadow Clone to play pranks with Naruto?" Hana asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yeah, he just popped and I got all the knowledge of what they did back…" Kiba grinned up at her and gave her the puppy dog eyes.

Hana huffed and let him out of the headlock. "You didn't do anything that's going to piss off any of the clans or get a report sent to the Hokage did you?"

"Nope!" Kiba chimed happily.

Hana tousled his hair playfully. "Go on then, you've walked all the dogs and brushed out most of them. I've got it from here. Thanks for keeping me company."

A pop-up appeared. "Quest Complete: Help Hana with the Kennels, +10 Reputation with Hana, +1 Animal Affinity, +1 Strength."

Kiba grinned and bounced out, Akamaru barking back at her happily.

Once away from the compound Charles paused the gamed. "Save Game, Slot One."

"Game Saved, Slot One."

"Unpause."

Kiba then bounced around the corner and made two shadow clones. "Okay you two, one of you henge into a girl and the other henge into someone besides me. Don't try to mimic anyone in specific we just need to look like a Genin team."

His clones did as instructed though the male clone was staring fixedly at the female clone. Charles winced and turned to look. The female clone had chosen to be Natalie Portman, and was currently wearing a wet white slip and fondling herself.

"Dude! Those are real?" The male clone reached over and played with her breasts as well causing her to gasp.

Charles sighed and thumped his head against the wall. "We're never gonna get anything done at this rate."

"I dunno, I think I can have my own lesbian orgy." said the male clone.

"Alright, enough." Charles swatted the female clone's hands away from her breasts. "Ninja outfit, with a flak vest over it. You can play with girly bits later."

The clone pouted but did as instructed and they headed to the missions office.

½ an Hour Later

"Why did you take a mission to pick up stuff off the training fields?" the male clone asked.

"You're me, don't you already know?" Kiba replied.

"Just making conversation; otherwise this is gonna get really boring."

"One, we're doing this to observe other people's physical skills. Two, we get to keep any weapons or equipment that aren't marked as someone elses that we find. Three, we can sell any scrap or weapons we don't want and make some extra money." Charles replied.

The girl giggled. "So, we're accomplishing four things at once then."

"That's the idea."

"Where to boss?" the male clone asked.

"First thing's first; I'm hunting down Team Gai."

The female clone frowned. "Should we really steal knowledge from Lee and Gai? They worked so hard for it. I don't want to be like that emo prick Sasuke."

"All we need to do is ask and they'll willingly train us."

"Good point…" She trailed off with a grin.

Focusing he made another clone and sent it off with the other two, panting a bit as he realized he didn't have a hell of a lot of chakra left… Then again, asking Gai for physical training wouldn't be taking much chakra at all.

Kiba and Akamaru bounded into the clearing where Gai and Lee were currently exhorting each other to greater heights and Tenten was throwing kunai and shuriken at Neji.

Gai turned to face the Inuzuka with the puppy stuck to his head. "Hello!" he called as he bounded over enthusiastically. "Greetings young Genin! Have you come to stoke the burning flames of your youth?!"

Tenten groaned and buried her face in her hands. "Could you please not say it that way?"

"Hi," Charles replied, he'd honestly wanted training from Gai… But seeing him on television, and reading about it in the manga and fanfiction did not do the "beautiful green beast of Konoha" justice at all. The man for one wasn't wearing crotch hugging spandex; he was in reinforced green canvas pants and a sweater along with his jonin flak jacket. The orange leg warmers and blue sandals were a bit much however. "My mom is Tsume and I'd like to build a good training regimen for myself and Akamaru before she gets back from her patrol."

Gai beamed and quickly agreed to make him a 'Most Youthful' training program as well as help him with it. He knew of Tsume Inuzuka's high expectations for her children and had designed a training regimen for Hana after she had assumed her position as a veterinarian to insure she wouldn't lose her edge.

Some Time Later…

Kiba and Akamaru had both collapsed panting on the ground covered in sweat. Tenten plopped down beside him and offered him a bottle of water which he immediately cracked open and poured some into a collapsible bowl for Akamaru and proceeded to carefully sip the rest to avoid getting sick. "The man is a machine!"

Tenten chuckled. "You volunteered."

"And I've improved more than I thought was physically possible... and apparently is at the moment."

His three clones walked up. "Boss, we're finished… man am I glad I'm not you."

Kiba stabbed the smartass clone in the leg with a handy kunai and winced as he popped because all the junk in his backpack fell on him and to add insult to injury it felt like he'd just stabbed himself in the leg. "Owww…"

The other clones just laughed at him and divested themselves of packs and sundry items before dispersing themselves leaving him with two piles of good weapons, one pile of scrap, an envelope filled with D-Rank mission pay for three and a throbbing in his temples as well as over a dozen popups. He quickly paused the game to deal with them before he continued his conversation with Tenten.

He went through and dealt with the popups and then unpaused the game.

"What was that about?" Tenten asked curiously with a raised eyebrow.

"That was … me doing a D-Rank mission by myself," Kiba admitted sheepishly.

"How?" Tenten asked.

"Well, technically all it requires is a three person team, or one higher ranked ninja who wants to kill time and make petty cash to accept a D-Rank mission from the mission office." Kiba grinned at her.

Tenten chuckled. "Okay, and I'm guessing you took one of the collection missions for cleaning up the training grounds."

"Yep!" Kiba replied enthusiastically.

"How'd you do it?" She leaned over and asked conspiratorially.

Kiba's nostrils flared, the smells of clean sweat and girl, pretty much overwhelming his sensitive nose. "Oh… I used shadow clones."

"That's a B-ranked Kinjutsu, how did you learn it?" Tenten asked in shock.

Kiba nodded. "Its the basis for one of my clans high end techniques. I can't use many at once obviously but I've gotten to the point where I can have 3 out without killing myself. Lots of chakra control exercises. Plus my sister is a medic nin so good control may run in my family."

"How good are you at water walking? Did it help?" Tenten asked excitedly.

Kiba shrugged. "I know how to do it in theory and I've read my clan's scrolls on how to do it… but I haven't even mastered tree walking yet."

Tenten grinned wickedly and leaned forward into his personal space and propped herself on her hands after crossing them on his chest and peered down into his eyes. Then she used a technique all Inuzuka learned very early in life… The dreaded Puppy Dog Eyes. "If I teach you water walking will you teach me the shadow clone technique?"

"I already know the theory I just haven't had any practice…" Kiba trailed off.

"We could practice later if you want…" Tenten trailed a finger down his chest. "Of course I always seem to fall in the water and get all wet…" a rigid protrusion pressed against her stomach where she was laying across him and his eyes were locked helplessly with hers.

Kiba found himself nodding numbly entranced as she gave a little giggle that did wonderful things to the soft mounds pressed against his stomach. "Sure…" he found himself agreeing and shook his head rapidly when she bounced to her feet and cheered. "Wait … what? What just happened?"

"You just got tricked into teaching her the Kage Bunshin," Neji replied.

"No, I'm pretty sure I just got a date." Kiba mused thoughtfully, "and personal training in water walking with a cute girl."

"I suppose that's one way of looking at it," Neji acknowledged.

"Gai usually releases us by three and I need some time to get ready," Tenten said thoughtfully, ignoring their conversation, "so come pick me up around five, and Kiba… bring clothes you don't mind getting wet in." She smirked and went back to throwing weapons at Neji with absolutely no warning.

Kiba looked thoughtfully at the three distinct piles of kit in front of him. There was no way he was going to be able to carry all that out of here with one backpack. Shrugging a bit he turned to Tenten. "Can I borrow a sealing scroll?" Tenten tossed him an empty scroll and he happily stuffed everything into it. "Where am I meeting you at five?"

"Come get me at my dad's shop; the house connects to the shop." Tenten replied with a smile.

"Will do!" Kiba happily replied and trotted off with his newly sealed items and three D-Rank's pay.