A/N: Published first on tumblr and AO3, then decided to publish it here too. (The pagebreaks look ugly ugh.)

Taboo

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If Donquixote Rocinante had been able to foretell the events that it would cause, he never would have brought Trafalgar Law to live with him and his brother.

(Scratch that – he would have, nevertheless. He just felt so damn bad for the stupid brat; there was no way to evade that feeling of sympathy that had welled up when he had seen the kid.)

In any case, it all began when he brought the kid back to the apartment he shared with Doflamingo, who had quirked an eyebrow at the kid and then looked at Rocinante with doubt in his eyes.

Perhaps it was Doffy's strange fondness for childrean – one of his more endearing aspects, to Rocinante's mind – but Doflamingo allowed the kid to stay, as long as he stayed out of the way.

Rocinante liked to think that even Doflamingo wasn't able to remain hard-hearted when watching the skinny boy whose very being seemed to be embraced by misery.

Law was a scrawny, withdrawn kid, and he spoke only a few words at a time while his eyes stared at nothingness. He stayed quiet when Rocinante asked about his parents.

Law was inside his own bubble, and there was no entrance into it – but Rocinante decided that he'd make one. He'd definitely help this kid, even if Doflamingo made fun of him for it.

(He knew his brother wasn't as hard on feeling, but Doffy wasn't the type to expose truth so easily.)

"I hate bread." Law made a face at the loaf Rocinante tried to offer him, and crossed his small arms over his chest defiantly, as stubborn as any kid when it came to denying disliked foods.

Rocinante could have laughed in relief; there was hope for this brat yet.

"Just eat your goddamn bread," he told Law, teeth biting onto a lollipop stick. "You'll never grow big if you don't."

Law threw him the dirtiest look he coul muster, and with the dark rings beneath his eyes and furrowed eyebrows, it was rather impressive – and yet adorable. Rocinante tried not to smile as it would only make the child angrier.

"I'll grow bigger than you and then you're in trouble," Law grumbled as he bit on the loaf, glaring at Rocinante with blazing eyes. "I'll make you eat shit."

It was relieving – even being at the receiving end of the kid's foul temper, Rocinante was relieved. The first time he had met Law on the streets, the brat had looked ready to collapse and die – and mentally, perhaps Law had died a little by then.

"First you gotta grow big and healthy, you fool," the man murmured to himself, glancing at his brother from the corner of his eye.

Doflamingo's lips had curled instinctively into a smirk. "Look, kid, you gotta aim big. Aim to grow up my height and then... you're big."

The way Law's eyes widened was almost comical, and Rocinante smiled as Doflamingo guffawed at the look on the kid's face.

Law slept in Rocinante's old room; he had made it clear that he 'didn't need to be babied' and he could sleep on the couch or whatever, but Rocinante had simply shoved the kid to his bedroom and taken to sleeping on the couch himself.

It wasn't a big deal.

A few weeks after them living together – tolerating one another – Rocinante had just lain down to sleep when Law waddled to him, poking his side carefully while holding a polar bear plushie in his other hand.

Rocinante cracked an eye open and squinted at Law, whom he could hardly see in the dark. "Why are you up, Law?"

"Too cold to sleep," Law muttered, voice shaking with embarrassment and darn if it wasn't kind of endearing. "Can I... sleep with you?"

Remaining silent for a while to raise the tension, Rocinante shifted quietly on the sofa. "I thought I showed you where the extra blankets were."

Law's turn to fall into silence. "They're shitty. Don't warm me up at all." He almost whined, and Rocinante bit his grin away.

"Hop on, then," he mumbled, pulling Law up to his lap and wrapping the blanket around them both, but it took a few tries as he kept accidentally rolling them both down from the couch.

Yet it was a night Rocinante would remember with a smile on his face.

Even with Law's seeming progress at relearning the art of living, Rocinante sometimes saw Law withdraw into himself and choosing silence whenever Rocinante tried to find out what was wrong.

These were the days Law looked like he wasn't in this world at all, and Rocinante was pushed out from Law's personal bubble.

It was horrifying.

It was like watching Law from the beginning to re-emerge and take over the kid that could smile, could laugh, could cuss like a sailor (undoubtedly learned that on the streets, but Donquixote brothers weren't exactly helping with that either) and could be... if not happy, then content at least.

But Rocinante didn't know what to do.

And what bothered him was that in Law's darkest days, the child sought out Doflamingo's company while not talking.

Law would sit on the floor, staring the same page in a book for fifteen minutes, while Doflamingo occupied the couch and surfed through all the TV channels.

Doflamingo would occasionally talk. Law wouldn't speak, but he'd make noncommittal sounds, and every once in a while look up at Doflamingo when the man said something Rocinante wouldn't catch.

And maybe it was just him, but perhaps he caught something flickering in Law's eyes during those times.

Nah, it must've been his imagination.

"Happy birthday, Law!"

Law stared at the cake suspiciously, eyes narrowed and brow furrowed, before turning to glance between the two adults.

"Which one made that?"

Doflamingo puffed his chest out, lips curving up. "I had a friend of mine make it. Last time Roci tried out the kitchen, we had to get a new apartment."

Rocinante coughed inconspicuously. "The oven malfunctioned."

Doflamingo gave him a 'we fucking went through this, you shit' -look.

Both of them were surprised when Law started laughing out loud, the sound pleasantly child-like and maybe even a bit happy .

"You two are idiots," Law gasped in between his laughter, his lips forming a wide, undeniably happy smile.

"Yeah, yeah," Doflamingo flicked his wrist at Law. "Just get to it, kiddo."

As he watched Law struggle with cutting himself a piece of the creamy cake, a thought dawned on Rocinante.

"Doffy, it's not Vergo that made the cake, is it?"

"How did you know?"

"LAW, DON'T EAT THE CAKE!"

"H-hey, Rocinante..." Law was twelve, introvert and embarrassed as hell, and Rocinante only barely resisted the urge to tease him for it.

"Hmm?"

"Can I... call you Cora-san?"

Rocinante stared at the kid blankly, the newspaper forgotten on his lap. "What for?"

"Well, you know. 'Corazon' means heart in Spanish, and..." Law bit on his lips, cheeks flooding with colour, and he looked away as his hands clenched and unclenched anxiously. "It sounds stupid, and I've read too many books, but...! Since you took me in, my heart feels... warmer..."

Rocinantes jaw fell open, and for a moment he couldn't comprehend. How did a kid like this exist? How? How?

Memories from all the good and the bad times flashed through Rocinante's mind, and his chest tightened until it felt like his heart was being squeezed.

If he weren't a Donquixote, he probably would have cried.

"Say something, asshole," Law grumbled, and the magic broke as a grin spread to Rocinante's face, and the man scooped the kid up to his lap for an embrace.

"Of course...! Call me whatever you like, Law... I'll be happy with whatever-!"

"Ow, ow! That hurts! Cora-san!"

"You called me C-cora-"

"Stop sniffling!"

Alright, he cried, but he couldn't help it.

Law's such a cute little brat-!

Things were changing, however.

At some point, Law's smiles weren't only for Cora, and Rocinante wasn't sure how to feel about that.

Now, as he watched Doflamingo helping Law with his homework-

(Law was in middle school already, and Rocinante felt so proud-)

-Law's attention kept switching between the book and Doflamingo. It was natural, perhaps, but Rocinante saw the different way Law's eyes glimmered.

He bit down on the cigarette that hung from his mouth, contemplating on the change of dynamics as Doflamingo's hand ruffled at Law's messy hir. An innocent gesture on Doffy's part, but the way Law's lips curled when he thought no one was looking...

Maybe he was just a hysterical step father over this matter, but Rocinante couldn't get the feeling off his chest as he watched Law do his homework with Doffy.

His gut feeling, no matter how off he had thought it to be at first, turned out to be right in the end.

"Don't encourage him, Doffy," Rocinante muttered to Doffy one day when Law was at school. (High school alreay, oh boy; Rocinante got the foreboding sense that the rebel years were ahead of them.)

Doflamingo never bothered to glance at him as he read through the newspaper with no care in the world. "What are you talking about, Corazon?" Doflamingo even took a big bite out of the sandwich Law had rebelliously left behind.

The nickname had caught on, and Rocinante nearly smiled when he thought about 12-year-old Law asking him for permission.

"Surely you know," Rocinante sighed, the unlit cigarette rolling between his lips and emphasizing his impatience. "Law. You know how he feels, don't you?"

Doflamingo merely smiled. "He's very transparent, isn't he?"

Rocinante frowned at the fondness he detected in the voice, his anxiety curling tight inside his stomach the more he thought about the possibility of-

"Doffy," he said as he contemplated the words he should use. "It's serious."

"Don't kids always want to marry their parent figures at some point?" Doflamingo huffed, frowing as he side-glanced Rocinante while adjusting the shades on his face with his middle finger.

How subtle.

"Law's fifteen now, Doffy," Rocinante argued. "It's not normal anymore."

"Law's heart would break if he heard you say that, you know," Doflamingo said airily as he leaned back on his chair and folded the paper, eyes now fully on Rocinante. "You're the one he's the closest to."

"His psyche's always been a bit damaged," Rocinante ignored Doffy's blatant attempt on getting him to feel bad, and he slammed his hands on the kitchen table. "Don't fuck him up more, Doffy. I beg of you."

"Your major in psychology certainly didn't go to waste," Doflamingo sneered as he stood up behind the table. "But aren't you getting a little too far yourself, little brother? Just 'cause Law likes spending time with me these days, you act like it's the end of the goddamn world."

The words sparked an ache within Rocinante, but he clenched his jaw and stared at Doflamingo relentlessly. "Perhaps I just care about Law more than you do, big brother."

The tension between the brothers crackled in the air, neither backing down, though both knew Rocinante had a point.

Doflamingo was just much more willing to leave the situation as it was.

Not too long afterward – a few weeks at maximum – it happened.

Law was late from school, late from his extracurricular activities, and Rocinante was worried and pacing in the living room, occasionally tripping on the edge of the rug.

Distracted by his heart-wrenching anxiety, he barely felt the pain – and when he heard the front door creak open, he rushed over, tripping more than once.

When he got there, well...

"Law?"

The fifteen-year-old didn't seem to notice him; the brim of his hat covering his face for most part.

"Law, what's wrong?" Rocinante's eyebrows furrowed when he saw the teen limp further into the apartment with swaying legs and a bleeding lip. "…Law?"

The boy gave no immediate response; he stood at the entrance like he didn't know what to do with himself. It was only when Law raised his head that Rocinante saw the bloody lip and the black eye Law sported.

Rocinante sprung to action and wobbled over to Law, tripping over only twice, to check on the teen. "What the hell happened, Law— shit, your nose looks broken." Rocinante frowned at the sight: blood dripped down to Law's chin, the nose seemed to tilt more left than usual.

"It's not," Law muttered, voice barely above a whisper. "Not entirely, anyway." The corners of his mouth tightened as Law tugged his hat lower to cover his face, hands trembling as they gripped the rim of the black-dotted hat.

Rocinante tugged Law's hands off of the hat, and took off the hat too. "Law, look at me." The teen kept his gaze down, hands clenched around thw hem of his hoodie, which too had patches of dark red scattered over it.

Rocinante frowned. "Did you have a fight?"

Not saying anything, Law nodded, tension radiating off of his smaller frame as he took quick, frantic breaths through his mouth.

"Okay. Who the fuck hurt you?" Now Rocinante felt anger rising from the back of his throat like lava, ready to be spat out at anyone that dared to bring harm to his boy.

Law swallowed thickly as he swayed forward to Rocinante, and – for the first time in a long while, if not for ever – Law clutched onto 'Cora-san', fingers tight around the fabric of Rocinante's dress shirt.

"Law?" Rocinante's anger melted to make way to concern as he wrapped his arm around the teenager. "What's the matter?"

"They called me..." Law's shoulders shook, and there was a wet sound Rocinante recognized as a sob. Law... "They called me a 'fag'."

Law slowly looked up, eyes wet and face bloody, at Rocinante, as if searching for help. "Is there something wrong with me?"

Rocinante's world might as well have stopped right then when Law uttered the words in such a defeated tone that it could have made a rock weep.

He grit his teeth together, pressed Law harder against his chest, and held his head with a protective hand. Those fuckers. He may not know the full story, but damn .

"There's absolutely nothing wrong with you."

There's absolutely nothing wrong with you, Law.

The words repeat themselves endlessly in Law's head, echoing again and again until Law felt like he could believe them and Cora-san.

Even as his hand worked to get him off to the thought of Doflamingo.

There is nothing wrong with you, Law.

Law's lips quivered with the effort to breathe, the pictures in his mind clear and precise and-

Absolutely nothing.

He stared blankly at the traces of the creamy white substance on his hand, his mind busy understanding what it was that he had done.

His lips curved into a mirthless smile.

He could hardly help himself at this point.

Cora-san dies.

Cora-san dies, and it's not his fault; it was a terrible accident at Roci's workplace, and when the firetruck came, it was too late-

In the end, Cora-san is dead.

Law never showed up for the funeral, Doflamingo noticed; he wasn't surprised, considering the kid's nature, but perhaps- perhaps he had hopedLaw would show nevertheless, to help him get through this.

Perhaps he really was as selfish as Roci had always claimed him to be.

Doffy lowered his head to the closed casket, muttered a few words only Roci would hear – "I'll take care of him for you too" – before leaving.

Even when struck with grief, Law was as transparent as ever – or maybe it was the grief that made it so obvious.

Law would sink into his own thoughts, and absently stare at Doflamingo and eyes would trail down to Doflamingo's lips.

And being the teenager he was, sometimes the eyes would trail lower.

Doflamingo, perhaps out of respect to his dead brother's wishes, ignored them for most part, though he already saw what he knew Roci wouldn't have seen in Law.

The attractiveness.

At some point, Doflamingo wasn't entirely sure when, Law stopped coming home for nights, and it bothered him.

It bothered the possessive part of himself that took most people for granted; it annoyed him on a level that he couldn't explain fully because...

There it was, that word. Because. And many possible ways to continue the sentence from there.

Doflamingo would sometimes stop and stare at the empty space across the table, though he was scarcely home himself at that point too – work was an awful, dreadful thing, and it stole Doflamingo away more often than allowed him to stay.

He wondered if Law felt lonely whenever he came back to the apartment only to find it empty.

At 22, adult in every way, Law was much more than just attractive, and the thirst Doflamingo had felt earlier was much more urgent.

He often mulled over the miracles of puberty – it had done good with Law, who had been skinny at sixteen, but muscles had started to develop either on their own or with some assistance – and appreciated it a little more as Law showed him his tattoos.

"You sure have a thing for the heart design," he commented, perhaps a tad jealously as he trailed a finger on the tattoo on Law's right shoulder. "Makes a man feel inadequate when his brother's excellency is showcased this way."

Law's smile was an insincere one, but Doflamingo often found drops of truth hidden in the edges of those smiles.

Law was very transparent.

"Maybe because that brother was, in fact, the better one."

"Says the one having dirty thoughts about his guardian's elder brother. Or rather, his other guardian."

Law didn't seem surprised, eyelids falling halfway down as he regarded Doflamingo quietly. "Why am I not surprised you bring that up when I'm half-naked around you?"

Doflamingo shrugged, an easy smirk finding its way on his lips as he drank in the rest of Law's torso. Really, Law would be wasted on anyone else.

It really couldn't be helped.

"And yet, you have been waiting for much longer than I."

Law had to glance away, most likely in embarrassment, but Doflamingo wouldn't have any of that – he turned Law's head back toward him, leaning down to get a taste of Law.

"I'm not a virgin," Law grumbled, his voice rumbling against Doflamingo's shoulder. Doflamingo's lips curled upwards, amusement apparent in each twitch of his facial muscles even as he tried not to outright laugh.

"You know what they say about barking dogs, Law," he murmured as he felt up Law's bare back , the well-formed muscles tensing up as Doflamingo's fingers trailed paths up the skin.

Expectedly, Law's smaller frame shivered at the simple touch, and Doflamingo's smile widened, the see what I mean thought audible even without the spoken words.

"Shut up," Law grunted, clicking his tongue in frustration, "actions speak louder than words."

"Yet you're still talking," Doflamingo mused.

The only response he got was an agitated growl that only served to make Doflamingo's smile bigger.

He couldn't quite decide which annoyed him more – Law's smug grin or the fact that indeed, he hadn't been the first to explore Law's body.

Despite Law being an attractive twentysomething, Doflamingo had hoped. The kid's crush on him all those years ago had been painfully obvious, after all.

Well, guess he had been a little too idealistic regarding the kiddo's feelings.

"Who?" Doflamingo murmured, watching Law's chest rise and fall as the young man caught his breath from the previous moments.

"Who what?" Law swallowed, light yellow eyes flickering to Doflamingo.

"Don't play stupid. You know what I mean."

Law actually laughed – the sound was low and raspy, but at the same time more liberated than what Doflamingo had heard from Law since Roci's death.

"If you insist," Law wheezed, breathless and his chest quivering from laughter. "Eustass."

The name didn't ring any bells in Doflamingo's head, and so he liften an eyebrow. Law sighed. "The redhead I hung out with when I was sixteen and seventeen? He visited here on occasion."

"Oh… that brat." Doflamingo seemed to remember the kid, now: hair as red as a firetruck, lipstick like blood, and eyes that were only on Law at that time.

At the time, Doflamingo hadn't really paid much attention to Law's social circles.

"Yeah," Law's lips tilted into a crooked smile, mischief lingering at the edges with a hint of nostalgia shining through. "He was the first."

Doflamingo's eyebrows went lower on his face, knitting together as he took in that piece of info. Despite how withdrawn Law had been at sixteen and seventeen, had he really not been able to tell that Law had had something going on with that redhead?

"He did come over frequently," Doflamingo hummed eventually as he draped an arm over Law's waist, fingers curling to rub at the hip. "So, you two—?"

"Not here," Law cut him off sharply, eyes narrowing into slits and the yellow of his eyes seemed to glow in the dim light of the moonlight that slid into the room through curtain cracks. Law's head tilted aside, breaking eye contact. "Eustass and I… never did that here. Not in this apartment."

Doflamingo's lips stretched into a teeth-showing grin. "Oh, is that how things are?" He tugged Law until Law lay on his right side, face now in front of Doflamingo's. Law kept his eyes from making contact, however, but Doflamingo remedied that easily by cupping Law's jaw and tilting his head until their eyes met.

"Yes," Law muttered, a frown on his lips. Apparently this was a topic he didn't want touched, but hell, he had gotten Doflamingo curious now. "After… Cora-san's death, it… seemed inappropriate," Law added without Doflamingo prompting him, eyes glazing over and a cold, distant look replaced the intensity that had boiled behind the yellow irises before.

It always happened when Rocinante's death came up, and Doflamingo suppressed a sigh, a wave of regret washing over himself as the metaphorical ghost of his brother raised his mop-haired head.

There wasn't much Doflamingo could say to Law's statement, however, and he contented himself by inspecting Law's features he could see in the dim light. "His place, then?" Doflamingo suggested off-handedly as his eyes rested on Law's lips.

Law gave a slow nod. "More often than not." He seemed like he was about to add something, but a yawn beat him to it, and afterward Law made no move to say anything.

Oh well.

Doflamingo closed his eyes and let himself fall asleep with Law comfortably tucked to his side.