Ahahahahaha….stiffly laughing with her hand behind her head

OK, I'll cut the crap this time. I am lazy and irresponsible writer. Bite me!

Here's a new chapter for you. Kei-chan, thank you, you are a Grammar Goddess!

I promise you a Venus/Seras bitch fight after this chapter, I swear!Please review!

Sailor Moon and Hellsing do NOT belong to me!

1…

2….

3….

Action!

Usagi wished she could scream, let out her trademark wail that freaked out neighborhood cats, made passersby cover their ears, children cry, and Rei furiously smack her upside her head.

But she couldn't.

Her throat was tight, lips frozen. She absolutely couldn't shake her state of numbness. This primal, unbelievable fear: a Vampire, she was laying on top of a frigging Vampire!

Alucard almost lovingly slid his fingers through the girl's thick blond hair. Her pale lips finally moved in quiet whisper: "Wake up, stupid! Wake up, wake up, DAMMIT!"

Alucard's smile grew even wider…

Usagi was barely able to keep herself from fainting.

Alucard ignored the heat coming off Usagi's brooch, which dug in his flesh. Her pale neck craved his attention. He wasn't exactly sure what he was going to do with the girl; he decided he would think about it AFTER he had a little taste…

After all, he had never gotten a delicious breakfast in bed before. Passing on it would be absolutely ridiculous.

She didn't see him move…wide-eyed, pale and absolutely terrified, she just felt piercing pain in her neck, which immediately was replaced with a hot wave of something that made her shudder – ANGER. She was so very angry!

As soon as Alucard felt the blonde's blood sizzle on his tongue, he cursed his bloody luck. He felt like pulling his fangs out.

Here she was, an enraged angel, floating above him – wings spread wide, eyes blazing with anger, a slim, accusing finger pointed straight at him:

"YOU! You BIT me! OW!"

"…"

Alucard would have absolutely loved to agree with the girl, IF he could open his mouth. Ouch. The pain his mouth was going through was absolutely unbearable.

An attack, most definitely, but by who? Was Integra playing a sick joke on him? Tired of his mischief in her dreams and his obnoxiousness? Not that he was in any way obnoxious, mind you. The goodness and light coming in large, solid waves from the girl were distracting. He couldn't heal himself properly and had to buy some time. A puppy. Nobody would kick a puppy, right? Especially the one with a dozen red glowing eyes…

Usagi was finally able to let out that awesome scream of hers when she witnessed a red-eyed dog monster.

Mina fell off the chair she'd been standing on in the library, where she was trying to look for clues on the Hellsing Family Secret Weapon™. Judging by the decibels of the scream, Usagi had gotten herself in some serious trouble.

"VENUS! STAR! AHHHH, SHIT!"

Integra walked into the library while Mina was pretending to stare at the Sir Hellsing portrait.

The platinum blonde in man's suit stared suspiciously at Mina's back. Mina's fingers were fidgeting with the transformation stick behind her. Oops! She quickly turned around and cheerfully waved at Integra.

Integra swore under her breath and briskly walked towards her office.

Mina plastered herself against the wall, sweating. Too close! Now! She had to save Usagi!

Mina transformed and ran towards the hall where she heard Usagi scream.

"It better be important, Usagi, I risked my identity!"

Mina hoped it was something unimportant, like a spider. She really hoped Usagi hadn't run into that Secret Weapon™, whatever it was. Mina shuddered at the thought and increased her speed, until she collided with someone in the hall's intersection.

Mina picked herself off the floor, holding her bottom. "Ow, ow, watch it!"

Delicate fangs, red eyes, and pale skin…

Mina's blood froze in her veins.

The girl, however, ignored Sailor Venus completely. She mumbled a stiff apology and took off in the direction that Mina had been running.

Mina opened her mouth, then closed it and opened it again. A vampire, in a Hellsing military uniform. She was scared to think of the possibility of Integra having some sort of contract with the undead. Crap. Usagi. Mina massaged her temples and took a few uncertain steps forward. It was hard to move when one's feet felt like they were glued to the ground. Mina forced herself to move faster, then broke into a run…

If that's how things were here in Hellsing – Usagi desperately needed her help.