"And so, in the spirit of the season, we will be doing a Secret Santa event." Said Nami, to the crew, who had gathered on the deck of the Sunny for a 'special announcement'. "Brook, your hat please.". "Of course, Nami-San. By any chance, would this favour grant me a peek at your-"
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Brook was face down on the grass, his head covered in large, red bumps. He was hat-less, but curious to see what she would do with his chapeau. "Write your name on these and put it in the hat please" said Nami, as she distributed several slips of paper to her Nakama. "I still don't see why we're going through all this trouble" Zoro grumbled, unhappy at the fact that he would have to purchase a gift in the maze of a mall during the busiest hours of the season. It wasn't his fault that those stupid shops changed locations every 5 minutes! "You scared of department stores, Marimo?" taunted Sanji, knowing full well that his crew mate couldn't find his way through an empty room. "Shut up you stupid Love-Cook!" yelled Zoro and the two proceeded to engage in a duel.
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Sanji and Zoro were sitting with their heads bowed in pain and shame as Nami stood over them with a smoking fist and a terrifying expression. "Now then, let's get on with it, shall we?" She passed around the top hat, and each crew mate took one piece of paper out and examined it before tucking it in their pocket. "Alright then! We'll be heading out to the island tomorrow, so take tonight to think about what you're getting for your Secret Santa!" said the navigator, allowing the crew to disband to mull over their Secret Santas.
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'Of all the people it had to be that stupid Marimo...' thought Sanii, as he absent-mindedly chopped his carrots. With his pinky. While flambéing a stir fry. Using only his thumb and index finger. 'Maybe I should give him a freakin' lump of coal'.
The idea was tempting, but Sanji ultimately decided against it, due to the fact that his precious Nami-Swan would kill him if she found out. "Arrgh!" He screamed out in frustration. 'What does that crappy swordsman like anywa...' an idea struck him like a thunderbolt. Of course! Why didn't he think of it before! He snickered to himself as he proceeded to the oven to collect the souflé he had made for the women. This would be a cinch.
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'Of all the people it had to be that idiotic ero-cook...' thought Zoro, as he lifted his dumbbells up once more. With his feet. Upside down. On one hand. 'That swirly-eyebrow freak doesn't even deserve my time!' he mind-screamed, as he switched hands. Maybe he could negotiate with Nami. 'Or maybe not...' he shuddered, remembering her flaming fists of fury that slightly resembled those of Garp. Besides, the cost of a favor from Nami was too high. Plus interest, he might not have enough Beri left to even buy a gift. 'What does that pervy cook like anywa...' and an idea popped into his head. He snickered. Why didn't he think of that before? What he had in mind was expensive, so he went to find Nami to offer to carry her bags for some extra cash. It wasn't like he needed help finding his way through the mall or anything... "Tch" he suddenly snorted. "Perish the thought." he said, to no one in particular.
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Luffy was dying on the inside. Keeping a secret was too hard! He kept his mouth shut for Nami though, who hadn't had a proper Christmas ever since Arlong took over her village. Now then; who was his Secret Santee again? 'Is that what you call the person who gets the gift?' he wondered, his mind getting ever farther from the topic. "Santee? Santoo? Santai? Wait, what was I thinking about? Oh yeah! Usopp's present!" He exclaimed, finally coming round in his train of thought. He lied back down on the Sunny's figurehead, trying to think of something the sniper would like. He made a mental list and then forgot it almost immediately. 'This is too hard!' he complained, as he slid off the figurehead and bounced towards the kitchen. Meat. Yes, that would help him think. "Sanji! Meat!" he yelled, as he burst through the door into the dining room. "Luffy, we're eating in 30 minutes" replied the cook, completely entranced with his work of making sure nothing was wasted. "Heh? But that's too long!" the rubber-boy whined, his face drooping and his eyes widening. "98,89- Wait what?" the cook shuddered to a stop, having messed up his count. "Now look what you made me do! You rubber bastard! Get outta my kitchen!" He screamed, as he drop-kicked his captain out of the kitchen, over the deck, and back onto the figurehead. "Back where I started..." Luffy muttered. 'But that was pretty cool.' He started thinking 'It was like being on Skypeia again; flying through the air...' and he got an idea. How he had gotten an idea from being, literally, kicked out of a kitchen, he had no clue. But he had an idea, and that's what mattered. He trotted down to the docking stations to find Franky.
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Gift-giving was Usopp's thing. He always had a knack for knowing the needs of the crew. Sure they weren't practical needs, like Sanji's cooking or Chopper's medical attention, but they were needs all the same. Such as Nami's Clima-Tact. And Brook's automatic instrument tuning machine (granted, he never used it, always being in favour of the the 'old-fashioned way'). So of course when he found Robin's name on the slip of paper, he knew exactly what to get her. 'A book.' he had thought immediately. But which one? 'Horror?' He asked himself, thinking of the woman's affinity to gore and guts. 'Mystery?' He asked again, considering the devil-child's sharp mind and ability to think of what others hadn't. 'Historical?' He questioned, recalling the archaeologist's greatest passion and life goal. And then he overheard her talking to Nami in the library. "You know navigator-san, occasionally, I find it pleasant to read something outside my usual choice of genre." the intellectual had stated. "Is that so, Robin-San?" The mikan-head had politely replied. "Yes. I find it quite refreshing to explore the many types of literature." Usopp backed away slowly from the door, and ran to his workshop to go over the conversation in his head. He could do 'outside', alright, but what kind of 'different'? He fiddled with his tools for a bit until he gradually developed his idea. "Perfect..." he uttered, as he began his blueprint.