Part 9 Cat gets the cream.
So here we are again standing outside Spike's crypt. Willow's got that odd look on her face that asks if she is being played.
Yes you are honey.
"What am I doing here, again?"
"Red, pet"
"Spike." Oh blimey, here we go roll call!
Miss Kitty- present.
"Are you ok pet?"
I'm fine actually, a little tired and…
"No."
"Oh love come on in."
Oh Fine don't ask how the kitty is, no I've just been chasing all around this damn town for you my paws hurt and… I'll stop whining now.
"I did it Spike, I broke up with Tara."
"That's alright, pet."
"And Buffy and Xander and Anya."
"Bloody hell when you go for it you really go for it."
Yes I fully realise all the double entendres that amass from that statement make up your own little joke and we'll get on. Quite finished? Good.
Willow stares at him for a long moment and then they both start laughing.
"I love you pet." Spike says looking into her eyes.
"I love you too Spike." She gives him a hug and aww don't they look all cute together. I feel sick again and I think its time to find that Tom cat and exert my dominance. Until her quiet question.
"Actually Spike I have a question I'd like to ask."
"What's that Red?"
"What *exactly* were you doing with my cat?"
Oh Shit.
"Hmm, what was that pet?" It no bloody use Spike, you just don't do innocent well. At all.
"Nice try Spike. That's twice I followed Miss Kitty to your crypt."
"Aw Crap. Kit. Come on out looks like we've been busted."
Hey Willow.
"Miss Kitty!"
Oh ok hugs are nice, yup very nice. Um honey I need to breathe!
"Ease up Red. Cat needs to breathe."
Would you knock that off, it's creepy!!
"Oh sorry Miss Kitty Fantastico."
"Nice name for a cat by the way Pet."
Oh pack it in *SPIKE* or I'll set Tom and Jerry on you.
"So what were you doing with my cat Spike?"
"Hey she came to me!"
And he used me to win Kitty Poker! Which I still owe you for, you overgrown mosquito.
"Um we bonded over some whisky and she offered to help me win you over."
"Ha ha Spike you do realise that she's a cat and as such she can't actually talk."
Here speaks the champion for animals everywhere.
Oh and she lives on the Hellmouth she should realise that anything is possible. Dumbass Wicca.
"You know there's this little thing called a blood bond."
Oh…again…shit.
"A blood bond?"
"When two animals bite each other and drink blood they have this sort of bond that allows them to communicate, normally just emotions but Kit is a special Cat, care of you leaving your potions out all over the place."
"Oh Goddess, so you can actually talk to Miss Kitty."
Yeah and it's such a picnic understanding what Captain Libido is thinking all the time. I hate baths and I've wanted cold showers all week.
"Yeah of course, and she is one clever Kitty."
Say that *now*.
"So you kidnapped my cat and went to hold her ransom for a kiss from me."
"She obviously takes after her owner."
"Flattery will get you nowhere."
"Really so what if I told you that you were gorgeous kiss and sexy kiss and oh so cute kiss…and I think there was some nibbling there too. Especially when you blush like that."
Ok guys I may have wanted you two to get together but I really didn't want to be this close to the action.
"I think I owe you that Kiss."
"And I intend to collect."
Guys? Guys? Ew eww eww. That's it scarred for life.
"Mmm where's Miss Kitty going?"
"I don't think she wanted front row seats. Don't worry pet, she'll be back. I owe her some whisky liqueurs."
"You've been feeding my cat alcohol?"
"She made me, pet."
"Well if cat can make you do that I wonder what I can make you do."
"Anything you want."
And on that note I close the crypt door. I'd hang around to listen for you guys but hey… I'm no peeping Tom.
I'm Miss Kitty Fantastico.
Matchmaker extraordinaire.
The End
So here we are again standing outside Spike's crypt. Willow's got that odd look on her face that asks if she is being played.
Yes you are honey.
"What am I doing here, again?"
"Red, pet"
"Spike." Oh blimey, here we go roll call!
Miss Kitty- present.
"Are you ok pet?"
I'm fine actually, a little tired and…
"No."
"Oh love come on in."
Oh Fine don't ask how the kitty is, no I've just been chasing all around this damn town for you my paws hurt and… I'll stop whining now.
"I did it Spike, I broke up with Tara."
"That's alright, pet."
"And Buffy and Xander and Anya."
"Bloody hell when you go for it you really go for it."
Yes I fully realise all the double entendres that amass from that statement make up your own little joke and we'll get on. Quite finished? Good.
Willow stares at him for a long moment and then they both start laughing.
"I love you pet." Spike says looking into her eyes.
"I love you too Spike." She gives him a hug and aww don't they look all cute together. I feel sick again and I think its time to find that Tom cat and exert my dominance. Until her quiet question.
"Actually Spike I have a question I'd like to ask."
"What's that Red?"
"What *exactly* were you doing with my cat?"
Oh Shit.
"Hmm, what was that pet?" It no bloody use Spike, you just don't do innocent well. At all.
"Nice try Spike. That's twice I followed Miss Kitty to your crypt."
"Aw Crap. Kit. Come on out looks like we've been busted."
Hey Willow.
"Miss Kitty!"
Oh ok hugs are nice, yup very nice. Um honey I need to breathe!
"Ease up Red. Cat needs to breathe."
Would you knock that off, it's creepy!!
"Oh sorry Miss Kitty Fantastico."
"Nice name for a cat by the way Pet."
Oh pack it in *SPIKE* or I'll set Tom and Jerry on you.
"So what were you doing with my cat Spike?"
"Hey she came to me!"
And he used me to win Kitty Poker! Which I still owe you for, you overgrown mosquito.
"Um we bonded over some whisky and she offered to help me win you over."
"Ha ha Spike you do realise that she's a cat and as such she can't actually talk."
Here speaks the champion for animals everywhere.
Oh and she lives on the Hellmouth she should realise that anything is possible. Dumbass Wicca.
"You know there's this little thing called a blood bond."
Oh…again…shit.
"A blood bond?"
"When two animals bite each other and drink blood they have this sort of bond that allows them to communicate, normally just emotions but Kit is a special Cat, care of you leaving your potions out all over the place."
"Oh Goddess, so you can actually talk to Miss Kitty."
Yeah and it's such a picnic understanding what Captain Libido is thinking all the time. I hate baths and I've wanted cold showers all week.
"Yeah of course, and she is one clever Kitty."
Say that *now*.
"So you kidnapped my cat and went to hold her ransom for a kiss from me."
"She obviously takes after her owner."
"Flattery will get you nowhere."
"Really so what if I told you that you were gorgeous kiss and sexy kiss and oh so cute kiss…and I think there was some nibbling there too. Especially when you blush like that."
Ok guys I may have wanted you two to get together but I really didn't want to be this close to the action.
"I think I owe you that Kiss."
"And I intend to collect."
Guys? Guys? Ew eww eww. That's it scarred for life.
"Mmm where's Miss Kitty going?"
"I don't think she wanted front row seats. Don't worry pet, she'll be back. I owe her some whisky liqueurs."
"You've been feeding my cat alcohol?"
"She made me, pet."
"Well if cat can make you do that I wonder what I can make you do."
"Anything you want."
And on that note I close the crypt door. I'd hang around to listen for you guys but hey… I'm no peeping Tom.
I'm Miss Kitty Fantastico.
Matchmaker extraordinaire.
The End