This is placed in the Colonial Days, and I got the idea from the song Trophy Father Trophy Son by Sleeping with Sirens.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything, if I did I wouldn't be writing fanfiction. Alas, Hetalia isn't mine, neither is Sleeping with Sirens or their song Trophy Father Trophy Son.

America was lonely. It had been more than a year since Britain last came to visit, and he said he be back soon! America guessed he lied, it had been happening more and more after all. Britain would stay for shorter times and be gone for longer and longer. When he did come back he wouldn't explain why he was gone so long. He stopped telling America what was going on around the world. Britain wouldn't even play pirates with him the last time he visited! The worst part though, was that he started keeping Canada away from him.

The little colony just didn't know what to do. He had even written Britain letters, but he never received a reply. He wasn't allowed to contact Big Brother France anymore either, and there weren't any other countries he knew in the world. His nanny also wouldn't answer any of his questions, she just shushed him and then locked him in his room.

One time America managed to escape from his nanny and went in search of Canada, who had the same idea as his brother. When they finally found each other they were disappointed to discover that the other didn't have any information. However, they did manage to make a plan to see each other again. Keeping America and Canada apart hurt them more than not receiving any news from their big brothers. The two brothers were determined to never hurt each other ever, because they were already sad enough.

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The night America came back from his trip to find Canada he wondered if Britain even cared about them. After all, he practically ignored them most of the time. America's heart ached to think that Britain thought of him and Canada as a waste of space. He tried to not think about that; he missed Britain too much, so Britain must miss him too! He couldn't help but wonder what Britain was doing, what was so important that he had to be away all the time? He could work over here! Why doesn't he send any letters at least? America never gets any word from the Empire while he's away, even though America wrote, with his nanny's help, countless letters to Britain.

Everything's so much better when Britain is here too. His nanny also wants him to be quiet, and throws a fit whenever he gets dirty. Plus, Britain always teaches him something cool when he visits! One time he showed him how to ride a horse, and another time he showed him how to make a fire and build a shelter! America's nanny is nice, but she doesn't get him. Britain is the best caretaker in the world, but without him around America's life seemed so much darker.

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A few years later America and Canada decided to follow Britain when he came back To visit them. Lately, whenever Britain came to visit he would go into the towns and spend most of his time there, sometimes he didn't even come back at night! America and Canada had been curious as to what he was doing for a long time. Until they finally decided to follow him.

During the first part of the day Britain walked into a bunch of craft shops and printing presses with his soldiers. America wasn't sure what he was doing, but he looked pretty angry when he came out. The people inside the shops didn't look very happy either. Then Britain spent the rest of his day in a pub. America and Canada stayed and watched until they heard him complaining about how uncooperative his colonies are. Then they couldn't get home fast enough.

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Another couple years had past and things were getting worse. It seemed that there was always tension at home, and Britain always seemed to be angry at him. Despite this, America still wished he would stay longer. He was so confused. He didn't understand what happened. They used to be so close, but now Britain could barely be in the same room as America for an hour.

"Did I do something wrong?" the colony constantly wondered. There was no other explanation to his brother's behavior. He must be waiting for America to realize what he did and apologize. The only problem was that he didn't know what he was doing wrong, everyday he woke up at dawn and did all his chores perfectly. Then he worked on his studies. However, Britain still seemed upset with.

America sighed as Britain stormed out of the room again. He'll just have to try harder, eventually he'll figure out what he's doing wrong.

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The Boston Massacre, America felt it burn in his heart. It was horrible, and he spent the night sick to his stomach. It was worse because he saw it happen, he was standing right there when Britain fired on his people. It hurt him so badly that it felt like he had been the people who were shot. Still, he wanted to speak to Britain. There had to be some explanation, there had to be! America knew Britain, and Britain is a good person. He wouldn't shot his people for no reason. Right?

Unfortunately, Britain never came back to the house. America waited up all night and all day, even though he wanted to crawl into bed and sleep for a year. America forced himself to go to town and ask where his brother had gone. What the soldiers told him nearly tore his heart in half.

Britain had left. He didn't leave a note, and didn't tell anyone to inform America. He just left in the middle of the night. America crawled into bed that night without Britain, hell he didn't even know where he was! And then, he cried, and cried. He couldn't help but wonder again if Britain even cared about him. His actions said no, but his words said yes. America didn't know what to think.

All America knew was that his head heart, his heart ached, and he couldn't stop crying that night.

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After the war America hoped things would be better between him and Britain. They could start over as equals, Britain wouldn't have to hide things from him. They could finally be brothers again. That's not how it went though. After the war Britain barely spoke to him, and at the World Meetings he ridiculed his ideas. America felt like shit. Was this how Britain thought about him all along?

Britain's cruel words crushed his will to try and mend things, and instead he took to waiting. He waited for a letter from his big brother for years, and nothing came. Then they went to war again, and America broke inside. Britain made him fight his brother. He had to hurt Canada, and it was the worst thing he ever did. His family wasn't a family; France used them to hurt Britain, Britain used them to make money, and America just hurt his closet friend and brother.

They weren't a family. A family is always there for you. Where were they when he was trying to make a government that works? Nowhere! They were just pestering him for money. America was all alone.

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America didn't understand it, and he guessed he never would. He gave up trying to get Britain to smile at him, and instead searched for a way to end the pain. Apparently countries can't die from normal causes, he tried and failed many times to stop everything in that way. Nothing worked, and nothing ever would unless he wanted to ruin his citizen's lives.

America just wished Britain would tell him why. The question had been burning in the back of his mind for years. Why did he always leave? Did he hate him? Is this how things were going to be? America just didn't understand, he would lay in bed for hours at night turning the question over in his mind. Everything spun around his head in confusion. He never found an answer.

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America and Canada made up after the war, and that made things better to deal with, but it still wasn't a family. England still wouldn't speak to him, and America still didn't know who he could trust, if he could trust anybody.

So he hid beneath a happy face, he pretended he wasn't hurt, and didn't know what was going on. Everyone thought he was an idiot, but none of them suspected a thing, and America was able to cope with the pain. Eventually though, his hurt began to fade. What England thought of him didn't mean as much to him. America made new friends, and found people he could trust.

America didn't need England anymore, and one day he finally told him that.

"America get back here!" England yelled at him. They had gotten into an argument after the World Meeting, and America refused to fight with him anymore.

"Why? I'm not your colony anymore, you can't tell me what to do anymore!" America shot back. England sputtered, he hadn't expected America to bring THAT up.

"No, but I'm your older brother. Since we're family you should respect my wishes," England replied calmly. America snorted.

"This is what you call a family? You, Canada, France, and me?" America asked curiously.

"Yes, of course! What did you think it was?"

"I think it's dysfunctional and fucked up that you call it a family. Canada and I are family, but you and France haven't done anything to be deemed part of our family," America stated calmly. He then turned and walked away. A single tear slide down his face, but it was the last one he ever cried for England.

Ta-da!

Lyrics aren't allowed in fanfictions, so I'm afraid you guys will have to go look them up if you're really curious.

So I dunno this idea has been stuck in my head for a while, and it's purposely vague about the events going on, but you can infer information and stuff.

I'm thinking about writing this from England's perspective, I would tact that on as chapter 2. If any of you would like to read that review and say so!

I would love it if you guys would review, tell me what you thought of it! Hearing your opinions/ideas makes my little heart sing!