Chapter 20

Izaya Orihara was a man of many flaws. He would always graciously admit them to himself though; he was the type that understood that the best way for someone to make use of any means that fell into his disposal, in order to keep emerging a winner in every possible circumstance, was to acquire full-fledged knowledge about them. And due to the first thing anyone had at their disposal being their own self, Izaya Orihara had always understood that knowing himself and analyzing him as thoroughly and objectively as it was possible, was the first step to any kind of victory.

That was why he understood. He understood very well why he inspired such hatred and disgust in his beloved humans, and that was why he honestly considered it okay for them to believe so about him. After all, his love for humans was special; it was more like an overflowing morbid curiosity mixed with sincere interest over an abstract and complex philosophical concept: humanity. Humans themselves didn't really matter when it came down to it, they just consisted an infinite amount of test subjects for someone – him – to be able to see just where were the limits of said concept. He often said that he wanted his love to be reciprocated but that was mere sophistry; after all, you can't get loved by an idea, and he knew that also very well.

He had long ago distanced himself from actual people, and this was exactly why he could see many more things about them than they ever could about themselves. He had even lied to himself multiple times to be able to achieve that, and kept knowingly lying in order to maintain that fragile but necessary balance. By doing so, he had managed to stay true to his own desires and kept observing people as he always liked to do, giving them each time the necessary push and amusingly watching where they would go. No one had taken the right path, but wouldn't have been interesting… he wondered though if it was his fault. But oh, who could surely say which the right and which the wrong path was? Eh, maybe the one where you don't hurt yourself and everyone else you love was righter than the other…

That was why he knew. He knew that the way he acted would sooner or later come and bite him in the ass. He knew that everyone he came across would sooner or later hate him and wish bad things to happen to him. He had heard them many times in the past, he would hear them even more times in the future: The angry yelling, the curses, the insults… and more than anything, the strong desire to see him humiliated, weeping, beaten and thoroughly broken. There had been, many times, even before those green monsters appeared, people who had expressed a strong desire to violate him sexually. He knew that it was the combination of his arrogance, his confidence, his trickery and his prepped looks that resulted to such reactions, but it had never bothered him before.

Before they had appeared.

Before HE had appeared.

The distance had crumbled and the danger was imminent. He knew that there was some kind of trauma after everything he had seen and experienced so far well hidden inside his psyche, but he had done his best to cover it up so far. But the words he used to sneer at and which would usually bounce right off his cold exterior of self confidence, were now coming back and itching their way in, like they never really left. The more Shizuo's hands embraced him and the more he caressed him and fondled him, the more painfully aware he was becoming that he would never be able to be truly intimate or perform any kinds of sexual acts without remembering those words… how degrading it would be to be taken like a bitch by another man, how exploitative, demeaning and downright awful. After all their previous tries, he finally understood that succumbing to Shizuo in any way, and for whatever reasons, spelled defeat from his part, and all he could hear in his head was just how much he deserved it. That he deserved getting fucked to the ground mercilessly. That he deserved to be treated like an animal. That he deserved…

"Izaya…"

The deep, beautiful voice brought him back. Izaya opened his eyes; he hadn't realized that he had clenched them shut. He looked up at Shizuo's beautiful face, into his beautiful eyes; his mind had long ago stopped trying to generate any other descriptions or interpretations about anything that consisted Shizuo. He was just beautiful. Every single thing about him was beautiful. How he hated him for that…

Shizuo just sighed. Izaya realized that he had frozen rigid, once again, for the millionth time, while trying to be intimate with Shizuo. He tried to remember what Shizuo was doing to him before; judging from the loose way his yukata was hanging down his shoulders, and his half undone belt which was allowing his right leg to show, he was probably caressing him and kissing his neck, trying to elicit a reaction perhaps, but he had gotten nothing once again. It was too bad that they hadn't managed the day before, caught in the moment; now they were too level-headed for this… at least, Izaya was.

He would reject him, as it seemed. Well, of course he would; who would like to be with such an unresponsive partner? It wasn't like Izaya blamed him. They had tried before but this was pretty much endgame. He had asked him to make him forget all the bad things but he had asked for just too much. Instead, all the bad things had flooded his mind. Now there were no excuses left. Shizuo would either get mad, or tell him that he didn't have to force himself if he didn't want to. Either way, Izaya would ask for forgiveness and the farce would end once and for all. His mind didn't want to go beyond that.

Suddenly, he felt a tag at his right hand. Surprised, he realized that Shizuo had picked it up. Izaya needed to sit up a bit, because he had fallen on his back, with only his elbows supporting him, as Shizuo loomed over him. He hadn't managed to open his mouth to ask what Shizuo was doing, when he saw Shizuo unbuttoning the first couple of his shirt's buttons and guiding Izaya's hand inside, so that his palm would fully touch the bare flesh. Shizuo's skin was warm, and his heart underneath was beating fast but steady. Izaya looked up at him, with his mouth slightly open but still unable to say anything. He was only asking with his eyes.

Shizuo's face was slightly red, out of excitement or embarrassment or both, Izaya didn't know. But no matter the reason, Shizuo still looked at Izaya in the eyes, as he spoke to him. "I don't know much about this… in fact, I don't think I know much about anything, but the way I see it, you seem to be under the wrong impression… or something." He said, hesitantly.

"…eh? …what do you…"

"This isn't something…!" Shizuo started saying, but he halted. It seemed like he was struggling to find the best words. "This isn't something that only one… it isn't supposed to be only for one person's delight or pleasure. It isn't supposed to be only for one!" He said, and he was getting redder as he spoke. He lowered his head and looked down at Izaya's hand, the one he was holding onto him. "Ever since you came here, everything you do… you think that you're obligated to do things that only please me." He clutched Izaya's hand more tightly, but carefully enough as to not crush it. "But this is not something… this is for two people to enjoy! It's not just for me, it's for two, so… what I mean to say is…" He finally looked at the side. "That if you think that you belong to me… then I belong to you too!"

Izaya would have laughed in any other situation, but now it just seemed impossible. He wanted to say things like how cheesy that line sounded, how clichéd, he wanted to make fun of him but he was weirdly unable to. He was just too stunned about what he was hearing.

So he just kept staring, as Shizuo started fretting. "It's not that I mean that you're my property or anything like that! I don't mean I own you or anything, people don't belong to people… no matter what everyone says, you're not my property, you're you and I'm me! What I want to say is…" It was so frustrating. This man was never good with words; he was clumsy and awkward, so why did he seem to say all the right ones? "What I mean to say is… touch me."

Izaya gaped. "W-What?" He curled his fingers on Shizuo's skin, rubbing it slightly and then opened them once again, out of fear of leaving scratches onto him. "I-I cannot…"

"You don't want to touch me?"

Beautiful. The golden hair he had glued his eyes on even during that insane first mayhem, though Shizuo would never know. The deep voice, either boiling with anger or offering soothing words, the one Izaya was always catching himself longing to hear, one way or the other, it didn't matter, it didn't matter at all, as long as it was focused on him and only him. The brown eyes that seemed like they held all the warmth the world had to offer. The soft mouth, Izaya knew that it was soft, usually twisted in a furious snarl, or grinning like a beast, drawing him into this man more than any of his human subjects was ever able to. Now it had settled into a small, apprehensive smile, and it sure as hell didn't lose charm. And those lean and firm muscles underneath that ever so slightly sun-kissed skin…

So beautiful.

How could he not want?

"I'm yours. Touch me. Do anything you like to me."

Aah… Shizuo.

Izaya knew for a fact that he wasn't a good person. He liked toying with people too much to be considered one. Shizuo might have been a soldier, he might have been someone who had committed some rather heinous acts during the line of his duty, but even so, Izaya knew, he knew very well that this beast was a far kinder and better person than he would ever be. How else would anyone else have been able to tolerate him… with such a short fuse even? Touching Shizuo would seem like he would be defiling something no power in the world would ever allow him to even get close to. That alone should have been tempting enough to make him try, but he found out that day that he was more of a coward than he already thought.

"I want to touch you…" He hesitantly said, and then looked up to meet Shizuo's gaze. He felt the other's heart rate speed up under his hand.

Shizuo blushed even more. "Ah… that's fine then, isn't it?" He scratched the back of his head, like he was always doing when he was nervous. Izaya knew. "Well then…" He scratched even more. "…go on…"

"I-I'm not worth-"

Izaya didn't get to finish his sentence because Shizuo bumped his forehead onto his. He yelped from the sudden pain, because Shizuo had a head made of iron apparently, just like the rest of his body, but it was actually more due to surprise.

"Don't speak of stupid things." Shizuo said, and then placed a really tender but fiery kiss on Izaya's forehead. "I want you to touch me." He said, and then looked straight into Izaya's eyes, and Izaya was able to see just how clouded his were. "I want to feel good with you…"

Well if he wanted it that badly…

Izaya wouldn't be responsible for what would happen next.

His mind suddenly cleared and his usual smug expression made its appearance on his face once again. Shizuo barely had the time to frown at the development, as Izaya used both of his hands to push the blond man behind, reversing their positions and having Shizuo land on his back. He wasted no time straddling him, as he grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and then proceeded to steadily unbutton it.

"Shizu-chan better take responsibility for this…" He almost sang as he worked on the shirt. It was almost unbelievable to him why he was so afraid just moments earlier.

"Heh, you bastard, don't you mean the reverse…" Shizuo was quite taken aback by the sudden change of attitude, but his devilish grin more than implied that he was happy enough for it.

"But Shizu-chan told me I could, didn't he?" Izaya purred, as he brought himself slightly forward. He doubted Shizuo would actually let him top, and that was honestly too bad; having finished with the shirt he tugged it open with one move, revealing Shizuo's well-toned chest and torso in all of its glory.

Shizuo was a man. Moreover, a man he had seen naked countless times. There was nothing new with the view, and still, revealing bare flesh at that moment made Izaya's throat dry, his heartbeat and breath erratic, just at the thought at ravishing the body in front of him. The hard sensation that he felt prodding his backside as he straddled the other man, only served to intensify that feeling, as he squirmed teasingly on top of it.

"Ah, fuck…" Shizuo groaned, closing his eyes and dropping his head behind.

Izaya giggled. "Soon, Shizu-chan, but how do you say it? 'Patience is the mother of all virtues', wasn't it?"

Shizuo didn't answer. Instead, he worked at regaining his concentration. "Hey." He finally told, and reached a hand towards Izaya. "Come here." He whispered, in a sweet tone Izaya had never heard before, as Shizuo cupped his right cheek. His eyes widened, and he let Shizuo guide him forward, until their noses were touching. "Let's take it slow, okay?" He said, as he kindly kissed Izaya's lips.

When their lips parted, Izaya spent a couple more moments looking at Shizuo's eyes before he smiled a bit and placed a finger onto Shizuo's lips. "Okay. But Shizu-chan lies back. Lets me do all of the work for now. Okay?"

"No complaints." Shizuo smiled and shrugged.

God damn it finally.

Izaya didn't even have the time to regret his thoughts or beat himself over the fact that he realized that he had waited way too long to get his hands on Shizuo; whatever that should mean. His malicious smirk almost reappeared, but he knew very well that if seen, it would earn him a punch and probably bring Shizuo back to his senses, so he dodged the bullet by hiding his face into Shizuo's neck, just at the crook, where his carotid was. He gave the soft skin a few experimental feathery kisses at first, but then he finally run his tongue down the flesh, and wasted no time latching his lips onto it.

Shizuo's moans and groans and he started licking and sucking feverishly at the sensitive spot were pure music to his ears. Perhaps this would be easier than he thought, he contemplated as he moved downwards, spreading kisses anywhere he could, filling Shizuo's chest until he reached his nipple.

He started viciously sucking on it and giving it slight bites, while he played with the other with his fingers. Smirking in between with the way Shizuo's body was arching upwards, in an instinctive attempt to feel even more of him, even more of Izaya's wet and warm lips, he have some more tentative bites as he decided to move even further down the other's body.

The abs were rock hard and Izaya just couldn't get enough. The more he was touching and kissing Shizuo's beautiful – and admittedly, delicious – body, he more he felt his own desires reach their peak, both figuratively and literally. The lower parts of his body had started growing extremely hot, and extremely hard; it was a shame, really, that Shizuo wouldn't probably let him top, he thought as he delved his tongue into Shizuo's belly button and heard his deep, sensual moan fill the place, imagining what he could have elicit by delving something else in another hole of the man under him. Would Shizuo let him if he asked the right way? It was possible, since he was so unpredictable, but there were two problems with that: One, Izaya had no clue as to which was the right or wrong way when it came down to Shizuo, and two, it didn't fit his plans. He still needed to play the part of the object – of a trophy. Of someone to be protected. And he couldn't do that if he was the one in control.

Well, he did plan to give up some of his control, but only a little, he concluded, as he unfastened Shizuo's belt and shoved down his pants along with his underwear, revealing his big, hard, raging erection. Shizuo's size was so frustrating and for so many various reasons. No matter how much porn he read, Izaya sincerely doubted that he would find a way to fit this enormous thing into his backside… He vaguely remembered how terrified he was when he saw it for the first time, and then it was even flaccid. Now, those thoughts and that fear seemed utterly stupid. It was really hard for him to believe that there was a time when he thought that Shizuo would force himself on him…

"Um… y-you okay?"

Startled, he looked up, to meet with a pair of half-lidded, yet worried brown eyes, red cheeks and disheveled hair; it was the first time he looked at Shizuo's face after he started his ministrations. He had lost a big deal of cuteness, but he suddenly felt his entire chest burst with pure satisfaction. That man, that one capable of wiping out armies, lift rocks triple his size and tossing them to the sky, the one capable of killing someone with the same easiness someone else would crush a bug, that man, with the monstrous strength and the even more monstrous temper, was now a blushing mess into his hands. Izaya could practically hear his own dick grow even bigger at the sight.

So he was just left staring at him and watching the blonde's worried face grow even more uneasy, the longer it took for him to reply. With thoughts barely coherent by how turned on he was, he realized that he must have seemed weird; after all, he was so passionate just moments ago, only to stop at Shizuo's dick and stare with a concerned look on his face. "Y-Yeah, I'm just fine Shizu-chan…" He said, and without allowing Shizuo to protest, he bent down and gave the hard shaft a rousing lick, from the bottom straight to the top of it, where he placed a light kiss.

Shizuo hissed and whatever he had wanted to say died right at his throat. He threw his head back and bit his lips hard in order not to scream. He didn't know if Izaya would have wanted to hear him, he probably would, but they weren't inside a house and they weren't alone. They were in a tent surrounded by other tents for five hundred more people, and if sometimes even the walls were not enough, the fabric of a tent sure as hell wouldn't be. Thank God they weren't transparent. He was a bit of embarrassed to be heard himself, sure, but he didn't even want to even imagine what that would spell for Izaya later.

He felt Izaya dragging the rest of his garments down his legs, and then settling between them. He propped himself up with his elbows, just in time to see Izaya's head going down on him, his dick disappearing into the dark-haired man's mouth.

For a moment, he saw white. It had been so long, too long, since he did this, and the ecstasy of the feeling almost took him over; for a moment, he would admit that he even forgot Izaya's existence. The only thing that mattered was the wet and hot cavern, welcoming his member and filling him with absolute pleasure. It took him a while to come down from his high. The fact that Izaya had wasted no time licking it and playing with it in his mouth, before he started bobbing his head up and down surely didn't help him to break out the trance.

Shizuo just surrendered, letting Izaya do as he pleased with him. He had seemed concerned at first; Shizuo was too. He knew that he was big, but the few women he had been with were always happy with that. But a vagina wasn't the same as an asshole, and he had never before tried anal sex. Well, he knew the basics, but he wasn't an expert at them, and that was why he had thrown away his dignity and asked for gay porn. At least he knew that if they did it as they had tried to the day before, he would have ripped him apart, and he just had to do anything in his power to prevent that.

He didn't know if it was because it had been so long since he had some, or because it was Izaya who was giving it, but Shizuo would swear that it was the best blowjob he had gotten so far. He did seem kind of inexperienced, compared to the women Shizuo had before, but maybe exactly because he was a man – and Izaya – he knew how to touch, when to touch, where to touch, at all the right places that would make Shizuo see stars. He loved occasionally taking a few breaks and licking it and playing with it before he continued sucking, making quite lewd noises, without ever removing his mouth since he took it in. He had tried to take in as much as he could, but he only got to the middle of it so he used his hand for the bottom half.

Yes, it was undoubtedly the best blowjob Shizuo had ever had the pleasure to receive.

He vaguely wondered if Izaya had done that before, for he was only a bit clumsy around it. He definitely hadn't done it in the camp, but wouldn't he have told Shizuo if he had someone special outside? Man or woman.

Probably not, this was Izaya he was talking about. But now he was with him, he was touching him, he was sucking his dick so what did anyone else matter. With thoughts like that storming his brain, he thrust his hips upwards, eliciting a surprised, choked noise from the object of his desires. Izaya looked up at him, not annoyed or angry, but actually surprised and maybe a bit worried.

Alluring and rusty eyes clouded, with some tears prickling at the corners, cheeks burning red as they hollowed just a bit, and a mouth tightly around his member. Izaya had quite dexterously worked Shizuo gradually to his climax, but the mere sight of him was the catalyst to almost drive Shizuo over the edge. He would have leaked enough precum he was sure but Izaya had licked it all clean during their session. Now, the only thing he wanted to do in the entire world was to finish inside the other's mouth, and have him swallow it all. Not only that, he wanted to grab his head and push it right up at the hilt, shoving his entire length down Izaya's throat while he was at it.

But his desire not to humiliate or hurt Izaya was far stronger than that. More so, those stupid robes were still clinging on him and it pissed him off. He wanted Izaya naked, all naked for him to see. He didn't want to finish before that. So he sat up and put his hand on Izaya's head, getting a soft but steady hold of it.

He felt the other man freeze like a frightened animal; his guess was that Izaya was terrified at him actualizing his urge to push him forward and have him deep throat him. His guess was more or less assured when he chose to push him back instead of down, removing his length from his mouth, making Izaya's entire body relax once again. But he did look up at him with even more worried eyes.

"W-What?" He stuttered. Shizuo noticed that he had a little trouble talking, like his mouth was a bit numb. "I-I wasn't doing it right…?"

Heiwajima Shizuo wasn't a man known exactly for self-restraint. While he had a talent discerning what was morally right or wrong without thinking much of it, restraint according to that discretion definitely wasn't one of his strong points.

So when he grabbed Izaya, turned and threw him on the ground, reversing their positions, and tore his robes away, it definitely wasn't a sign of self-restraint. No, that was now long gone. He had exhausted that while concerning himself with Izaya's issues before, now everything was wiped blank. The most he could do was barely registering not to actually tear Izaya's clothes.

"Oh God…" He just exclaimed, with a rasp and husky voice, as he looked down at Izaya's naked body and his flustered face. His robes were all open, and he wasn't wearing any underwear, only the sleeves still remained around his arms. "Oh God, please help me… You're so… you're so…! …Everything!"

And Izaya Orihara wasn't a guy that received compliments very often. Or at all. The most he would get would be a 'you're so handsome', or 'you're such a nice, considerate person!' of course before he screwed with them. But at the moment, it felt okay to never hear nice words ever again from anyone, for he had just received the ultimate compliment. Its charm would probably last for a lifetime. He knew that Shizuo had his own way with words and that he wasn't as stupid as he often made him out to be, but the way, when the right time came, when he threw away all of the useless ones and used just the perfect one was beyond him.

So he slightly smiled, and sat up and let the remains of his robes fall down his arms, leaving him now completely naked, as Shizuo was. He cupped Shizuo's cheeks with both of his hands, as he leaned forward and rested his forehead on Shizuo's.

"Then Shizu-chan is my everything, too."

It was no wonder that he was abruptly and forcefully kissed, tongue delving into his mouth and dominating it, for just a few seconds and then he was tossed behind at lightning speed, as well. Or that he felt hands roughly spreading his legs apart, as Shizuo was positioning right between them. He didn't blame him. He wanted him just as badly. He was no longer afraid. He had never done anal, and he couldn't imagine how it was to be on the receiving end though. He was confused about his own desire, not sure if he wanted a dick up his ass, or how exactly it could feel.

He just watched as Shizuo shoved some fingers into his own mouth, sucking and licking, lubricating them with his saliva. "It's the closest thing we have…" He said, almost apologetically, as he continued the display Izaya was more than enjoying. "I think it can do the trick…" And they didn't have anything else to use.

"Wow, Shizu-chan sure did his research." Izaya giggled, as Shizuo frowned, a bit annoyed, a bit embarrassed. Izaya could read at his expression. It spelled: who do you think I did it for. "So I was right, doing my best to lick it as much as I could…" He purred lustily, and then brought his foot up, trying to rub Shizuo's dick with it. "Look, it feels so wet against my feet…"

Shizuo wasted no time grabbing that foot by the ankle and lifting it up, treating himself to a full view of Izaya's backside. "Yeah, they also said that the best way to do it would be from the back, with you on all fours…" He grinned sadistically. "But as tempting as that may sound, I want to see your face when you're taking me inside!"

"Eh? So, Shizu-chan, you're going with the slutty option? Whatever happened to being slow or gentl- nnnnghh!" Izaya was cut off as one of Shizuo's fingers suddenly slipped inside him. His muscles tightened around it instinctively.

He couldn't lie. It hurt like a bitch.

Now he was starting to seriously get scared once again. It wasn't like he was being a little bitch whenever he got a wound, but he wasn't seeking pain either. And this was only one mere finger. Not Shizuo's enormous thing.

This wouldn't be easy.

"I-It hurts." He let out, as he gripped tightly at the sheets beneath him, and clenched his eyes shut.

"Relax." Shizuo said as he dropped the leg he was holding up his shoulder. Izaya gave him a rather irritated look, one that spelled easier said than done, but Shizuo continued. "Just try to feel it." His words were calm and he looked like he knew what he was doing. "I'll keep doing it until you're comfortable with it, for as long as it takes. Just feel it."

Shizuo's words soothed him a bit so he let his head fall down and tried to concentrate. Slowly, the pain started subsiding. He had to admit that it wasn't all that unpleasant. After some thrusts, he started seeking it.

"I-It's not bad…" He uttered, and Shizuo immediately added another finger inside. Now that he had gotten used to the feeling, it wasn't as bad as the first one. He felt Shizuo making scissoring movements with them, trying to relax the muscle. It honestly wasn't bad. They way Shizuo was thrusting them and playing with his insides… Izaya never knew that playing with his ass would make him feel this way. He knew how it worked and why people did it, but experiencing it…

Shizuo added a third finger and it had started to hurt a bit again. But now he was so turned on he even welcomed the hot sensation, as complimenting to this weird but pleasurable feeling he was getting. And when Shizuo curled them inwards and pushed, hitting something Izaya didn't even know it existed there, he let out a really loud cry.

He covered his mouth with his hands immediately afterwards, but the damage was done. Above him, Shizuo was grinning like a maniac. "How was it? Did I hit it? Come on, tell me, did I?"

Izaya felt a whole new kind of fear at what was about to occur. He would lose his mind. He was definite about that. He didn't even know what he had felt, how it was possible, what the electric shock that had run through him was and how the hell Shizuo knew how to do that.

And then Shizuo pulled his fingers out. Izaya was left empty headed until he saw him spit more saliva inside his palm and pumping up his length. He just stayed there and kept looking at him wide eyed, until Shizuo finished, adjusted Izaya's legs around him a bit better, and guided it towards Izaya's hole.

"N-No! NO!" Izaya propped himself up with his elbows and put a hand on Shizuo's shoulder, stopping him just a hair's length away from his ass. Shizuo looked up at him, only to see him shaking his head left and right, panicked. "No, no, no don't do it, stop it, stop it!" Shizuo just kept staring at him, so he felt like he had to explain himself. "I'll go mad! I'll go mad, I'll get crazy, so stop it, stop it, YAMERO!" He screamed the last word that meant stop in his native language, as Shizuo pushed into him, completely ignoring his pleas.

For one thing, he had no longer the mind to do any kind of second-thinking translation in his mind. He kept mumbling words at his native language, that wouldn't even register in his own mind, as Shizuo started slowly but steadily push into him. He was even thankful for the pain, because even if it was almost unbearable, it was a sensation he knew and he was familiar with. What he dreaded was what would come afterwards, and he knew it would. Shizuo was inside him, and that thought alone…

"But I want to see you go mad." He barely heard what Shizuo was saying. To his defense, the blond strong man was almost whispering it. "I want to see you go mad from the pleasure I will give you. I just want to make you feel that good." And with that, he buried himself inside Izaya up to the hilt.

They stayed there, trying to catch their breath for some moments. Shizuo leaned down, kissing Izaya's cheek, his forehead, his mouth, his neck, trying to make him relax. Shizuo rarely felt pain but with the way Izaya's muscles were tightening up around him, even he felt uncomfortable. He didn't want to imagine what that would feel for Izaya. When he looked at him, he still looked panicked. Shizuo knew what he was afraid to lose. Control.

"Izaya… it's okay." He whispered, inside the other's ear. "It's okay, so just feel me. It's okay, stop thinking about anything."

Izaya shook his head vehemently. "No… no, I can't I'll… I'll die!" He barely put words together.

"You won't die." Shizuo reassured him. "Does it hurt that much?"

"I-It's fine if it hurts…"

Shizuo turned and looked at him in the eye. Izaya was ready to cry, but he held back. "No, it's not fine." He scolded him. "It's not supposed to hurt." He said, as he placed a small kiss upon Izaya's lips. "Trust me. I'll touch you properly."

He pulled back a bit, at the same time going a bit out of him, and he watched as Izaya bit his lips and clenched his eyes shut. It hurt, he was sure that it did, but they had done everything they could about that, now they just had to get past that. He slowly thrust back inside again, and then pulled out, this time more than the previous one. Then he thrust back in.

There were no protests coming out of Izaya, so he took it as a sign that he was doing something right. Slowly but steadily he started to pick up the pace, each time pulling out more before he buried himself back in. Izaya was moaning and whimpering in his hands, but he never got too loud. Ah, that was right. He was fucking Izaya. He was fucking that man. That was what he was doing at that time.

He grabbed Izaya's wrists and pinned them down at each side of Izaya's head, as he started fucking him for real. The muscles around him had relaxed but gripped him firmly and deliciously, as he picked up the pace and started seriously ramming into him. Izaya was letting out some small cries, but his struggle not to scream was more that apparent. When his teeth finally tore his lower lip, Shizuo delved down and kissed him, licking and drinking all the blood, muffling his screams more effectively. He knew that Izaya was thankful for that, until he angled himself differently and hit the spot he had hit before.

Izaya screamed just the moment Shizuo's mouth left his, so it was definitely heard around; but he honestly couldn't bring himself to care at that point. He had reduced himself to the point he hated, meaning to the point where he had absolutely no control over himself and he couldn't think of anything. He started screaming Shizuo's name as he broke his wrists free and wrapped his arms around the blond man's neck, his real name and not Izaya's beloved nickname.

As Shizuo continued to thrust inside him, hitting his spot, drowning him in pleasure he had never felt before, he could hear skin slapping against skin, smell Shizuo's sweat, taste his own blood mixed with the taste of Shizuo's dick, see a turned on and pleasured Shizuo burying his dick inside his ass, and more than anything, feel it.

From anything else, feeling the big, burning rod rubbing and scrubbing through his insides, stabbing repeatedly that very special spot which sent waves of pleasure all throughout his body and spots on his vision, was more than enough to reduce him to that mess. Izaya had lost himself. He couldn't remember who he was, he barely remembered who Shizuo was. Was that what people were supposed to feel when they had sex? Sure he had come undone too for some moments during his climax a couple of times before but this…

He could feel Shizuo grow bigger inside him, and he also started feeling other hot things making their way into him. He looked up and Shizuo's face was contorted, a sign that he would come at any given moment. He would come…

He would come inside. In his ass. Another man would come inside his ass. Before Izaya could realize what that meant, and if everything else weren't already enough, Shizuo grabbed Izaya's dick, and started stroking him vehemently, as he rammed inside even more violently than before.

Shizuo came first. Izaya followed the next moment, as soon as he felt all those hot stuff splashing inside him and hitting his inner walls. He came hard inside Shizuo's hand, painting it all white and having it trickle down from his fingers. How loud was he screaming, he didn't know, he couldn't hear. All he could hear was Shizuo's deep groans as he rode on his orgasm, giving him even more thrusts inside and releasing more of his sperm right into his ass.

Completely violated and thoroughly fucked, Izaya welcomed Shizuo as he slid out of him and collapsed on top of him, breathing just as hardly as he was, locking arms around him like he would never let him go.