A/N: So this chapter is a lot, but i hope you guys like it. TRIGGER WARNING: mentions of rape/abuse.

Regina steadily paced back and forth among the forest life, wringing her hands and worrying her full bottom lip. Several hours' time had passed from the moment the former mayor pulled out of her driveway that unfortunate morning. She'd been waiting all day for what exactly she wasn't sure of. As if she had been expecting it, Regina knew exactly when Emma had read the letter; she felt it when Emma lost control. The blonde's swirl of emotions hit the former mayor like a tidal wave, bringing her to her knees. The pain had been insatiable as she coughed up blood unto the grassy ground. And just as quickly as it had come, the pain vanished. She had called sometime after it happened, and Henry and Snow and the whole Brady bunch, but she answered none of their calls. Something foreign and impulsive made her pull out her phone and listen to the voice message she knew was there. Tears stung the corners of brown eyes as her love's tired and edgy voice washed over her.

"Well Regina, you've done it again. As soon as we find some sort of peace in this crazy town you go throwing a wrench in the plan. And I know what you're thinking—that just because you left me the letter doesn't mean that this is my problem. But here's the thing, it sort of is. Just like everything you do is my problem, and everything I do is your problem. For whatever reason, we're in this together. I guess we always have been. I hope you have service wherever the hell you are because I really need you to here this. And I don't know what drove you to tell me how you felt, but I appreciate it. I've always wanted to know what was behind that mayoral posterior and now I know. Anyway, we'll talk about that another time. I just want you to know that whatever trouble you're in; I've got your back. And I'm coming after you."

The brightest smile she'd allowed herself in months graced her features as tears cascaded down flushed cheeks. Even if Emma didn't make it to her in time and even if Emma didn't return her feelings, her wanting to save what was left of her made everything worth it. Her body began to tremble and she could feel the timber of magic coursing through her veins, sending surges of uncontrollable power into a heart that wasn't hers. Regina paused and took a deep breath. The brunette's body was becoming weaker by the second. Every breath was a battle in itself, a war not yet won. She leaned back on the hood of her car, eyelids sliding closed. Emma made her sacrifice worth it; she was abandoning all that she knew and loved for a chance to finally do what she thought was right, what the savior would do. Haunted dreams and lingering whispers had called her to this very moment, and she knew that sooner or later she'd have to face them. Her.

"Princess?" A small voice called from behind her, effectively snapping her out of her thoughts. Regina's eyes peaked open as she turned to see who it was. The boy was small, she noted, and he couldn't have been much younger than Henry. His brown skin glowed in the early sunlight, wild eyes dancing with tendrils of green and grey. Raven curls fell around the boy's shoulders.

"Who are you?" She asked, her voice pregnant with strain. Army green trousers fell loosely around his waist and billowed out down to his ankles. A cream vest accented his off white embroidered tunic, brown slippers encompassing his small feet.

"I am Raja. You are far sicker than we thought, princess."

"Yes, well that can't be helped much now, can it?" She replied offhandedly. A warm smile broadened the boy's handsome features.

"Oh, but it can princess!"

"Why do you keep calling me princess?" Raja seemed confused.

"You are princess Regina, are you not?" Surely he was mistaking her for someone else; she was no princess. She was a queen, or at least used to be. But she was certainly not a princess.

"Are you the one that sent me the message?"

"Yes. Humans have such strange things, your Highness. I have been to many worlds, but this is definitely the most peculiar. I should like to leave now, if it pleases you. " Raja raised his right hand and whispered a foreign enchantment, opening a portal behind Regina. She blinked in surprise.

"How do you have the magic to simply open a portal at will?"

"I am a gypsy, you're highness, as are you. We have magic stronger than any other. This is mere child's play."

"I've never been able to open a portal, at least not by myself ..."

"You only need try, highness, and anything you wish will come to be. It is in your blood." Regina looked at the portal skeptically.

"Where will this take us?" Raja smiled again.

"Home." The boy raised his hand to Regina, silently asking her to trust him. She swiftly pulled out her phone and sent out a quick message. Casting a glance at the crimson sunset with a wayward smile, the woman tossed the phone away. Looking back to Raja she grasped his hand, and together the pair stepped into the portal.

Regina stumbled onto hard concrete, gasping for air in her dry lungs. Hazy black spots clouded her vision as she fought to maintain her consciousness. Troughs of raw magic shot through her heart. The witch clutched at her aching chest.

"Regina?" A loving voice called to her from above her position on the floor. Her head lazily bobbed up from the ground, pain etched over her features. Regina was met with a blurry woman's figure. A soft hand graced her cheek. The last thing she felt before slipping into unconsciousness was the warm press of smooth lips on her forehead, and a hushed reassurance.

Lithe fingers combed through Regina's shoulder length hair as she slowly drifted awake. The comforting scent of flowers hit her nose, eyes fluttering open. She soon realized that her head was in the lap of a woman, and her body shielded by covers. The witch quickly extracted herself from the woman and backed away against the metal headboard of the bed. Said woman wore a pleasant expression on her native shaded skin. Darker than black hair cascaded down the woman's back. She looked to be at least in her fifties, but her features were quite becoming. Her emerald eyes shined with love and adoration.

"Who are you?" Regina squeaked, voice small and spent. That certainly won't do, she thought to herself. The witch sat up straighter, hiding the pain from her face.

"Regina ..." The woman smiled. Her emerald green eyes brimming with tears.

"How do you know my name?" Regina asked again, now irritated.

"I'm the one that sent for you, dear." She stared hard into the woman's eyes, searching for an answer.

"Are you the woman from my dreams? I could never see your face, but you seem oddly familiar and I don't know where else I'd know you from."

"Yes. My name is Esmeralda." Regina frowned, still in shock.

"I read about you in The Lost Fairytales."

"So then you know who I am." The older woman raised her chin in a regal gesture.

"I'd like to hear you say it first." She challenged.

"You're my child, Regina." A softness swirled in Esmeralda's eyes, but her face remained stern. She noted the flash of sadness and vulnerability that swept across her daughter's face. And as many years of being a royal taught her, she watched on as the younger brunette swiftly schooled her features into a blank mask.

"I haven't been a child for many years, and you haven't been my mother for even longer." She sneered at the woman. Her eyes hardened into a dark abyss as she clenched her jaw.

"I have always been your mother."

"Have you? I must have missed those years."

"Just because we were apart doesn't mean that I was no longer your mother."

"Oh, it doesn't? Then, pray tell, where were you when my mother abused me for eighteen years?" A sadistic glint shone in Regina's nearly manic smile. Her words were laced with a venomous sarcasm. Esmeralda did not answer.

"Or when she killed my first love, were you my mother then?" She stood from the bed, now zeroing in on her mother like prey.

"Oh I know, how about when she forced me into a marriage with a man old enough to be my father?" Hollow laughter ricocheted throughout the vast space. Esmeralda stood and faced away from Regina trying desperately to hold herself together.

"Stop it." She whispered fiercely.

"Stop? You want me to stop? But I'm just getting to the best part! After all, you've been my mother this whole time. It's only right that I fill you in on all the years you missed! Let's see, why don't we talk about when she whipped me like a slave when I muddied my boots, or when she'd make my father watch as she beat me?!"

"Were you my mother when she ….. when she had me raped by a man she'd met at a tavern?" Her voice had slipped into deranged screams as she unveiled her gruesome past, her last words spoken in a desperately sorrowful whisper. Chest heaving in anger, she swiped furiously at her plummeting tears. Electricity crackled on her skin, spurring on her unwanted breakdown.

"I'm so sorry …" the older woman choked out in harsh sob.

"You're sorry?! Where were you?! Where were you when I needed you?!"She cried. Magic seethed in her chest and lungs at the over exertion. She stumbled slightly but her voice would not falter.

"Let me make something very clear to you, Esmeralda," She spit the woman's name like venom.

"I am not here to play house. I didn't come here to have some precious mother daughter reunion, and I sure as hell don't need your apologies. I came here to rid myself of this magic ridden heart and return it to its rightful owner. So you can keep your meaningless apology. 'Sorry' isn't going to change what happened to me, what you let happen to me." Regina seethed. A fit of raucous coughs staggered her breath as she fell to the floor. Tears continued their stream while she hacked up black blood. Esmeralda kneeled in front of her, attempting to move her into a sitting position.

"Don't touch me!" The younger brunette wheezed. Her mother simply used greater force and placed a hand encompassed in glowing blue light to her chest. Her touch was warm and momentarily alleviated the pain beneath her bosom. Regina struggled to catch her breath.

"I didn't let anything happen to you, Regina. You were stolen from me as a baby, and I have spent this entire time looking for you. When you were taken we couldn't find you because your heart was replaced, and Cora knew that when she took you. Without your heart we couldn't see you with our magic. I wish more than anything that I could have found you sooner and spared you of all the pain that you suffered, but I can't. I can't change what has already come to pass, Regina—no matter how much I want to. And regardless of what you want to hear, I am sorry. I've failed you as a mother and I am so sorry." She placed a tentative hand to Regina's cheek and wiped away her tears. The younger brunette was far too worn to fight the gesture and instead leaned into her mother's soft hands.

"Did … did you and my father ever love me?" Her words were vulnerable and weak to hear but she could no longer find it in herself to care.

"Always." She said without hesitation. The older woman's smile was fragile. Regina gave a dull nod.

"I'm tired." Brown eyes were covered by drooping eyelids as she fought to keep them open.

"I'll be here when you wake." She nodded again and drifted into a fitting slumber.

This time when Regina awoke, she didn't fight her mother's gentle caress of her hair, nor did she welcome it. Sensing her tension, Esmeralda began to speak.

"It's been so long since I held you last. You were just a baby, still my little princess. You used to lie on my chest and listen to my heartbeat. I would sing to you, old hymns of our people. It used to make you so happy, right before you would fall asleep. Your little tiny hands would hold onto my hair all night, I think you were afraid that I would disappear if you didn't ... You were such a precious little baby. You're father and I adored you so much. He used to stand over your bassinet and just stare at you while you slept. The light of his life, he would call you. I wish that he was alive to see you now, I think you would've liked him ..."

"When did he pass away?"

"He was killed trying to save you from Cora. She ripped his heart out and crushed it, and I was too late to save him." The tale was painfully familiar to the former mayor.

"I'm sorry..."

"Don't be. You're father was a strong and brave man, and he loved you dearly. His only regret was that he couldn't stop her from taking you. Phoebus would have died for you a million times if it meant that you would be safe." Regina pulled herself from her mother's grasp, looking anywhere but at the woman in question.

"I don't know if I'll ever be able to forgive you …." She murmured.

"I'm not asking you to, but I would like to have the chance to get to know you." Esmeralda smiled, brushing a stray hair out of her daughter's face.

"I don't need a mother anymore." Her words stung, but the older woman refused to be deterred.

"Then allow me to be your friend, if nothing else. Everyone needs a friend." Regina studied her mother's face. They had the same nose, and her lips were just as full as hers. Although her mother was darker skinned, she looked exactly like her. Except her eyes; green flecked with blue, and bright as stars. Like that of someone she missed dearly.

"I suppose that would be …. Adequate." The smile directed at her reflected her own when she allowed herself to smile.

"You remind me of my father, so proud and strong. He's going to adore you, I'm sure."

"I read his book. He seems like an interesting man."

"Yes, he and your father were very close. We met Phoebus when we first came to the human world, he was a soldier."

"What was he like?"

"Your father was wonderful. He was always making people laugh and doing things to help others. He would have been a wise and noble king, but because he wasn't a gypsy he couldn't take the throne. I married him anyway, of course. That's why my father has ruled for so long, because I refuse to take his place." Regina frowned.

"And why would you do that?"

"It's not mine to take, and even if it was—I'm no ruler."

"Well if you don't want to take your father's place, who will?"

"Since I've forsaken my birth right, the throne is technically yours. You are the next in line." Regina laughed, fervently shaking her head.

"No, absolutely not. I'm not going to rule over people that I don't even know. And besides, I've already had my time as a queen and I have no desire to be one again."

"Yes, I've recently heard tales of your time as the Evil Queen, but that is who you were, not who you are."

"I know exactly who I am." Regina snapped.

"Do you?" Esmeralda eyed her warily. "What are you referring to?"

"Your heart is very troubled."

"Well obviously, considering that isn't mine." Her snide remark was ignored.

"When I healed you, I sensed a bond in your heart. It's tied to someone else's." Regina rolled her eyes. "Yes, I know. The fairies already told me that Robin Hood is my true love, but that ship has sailed."

"Well unless Robin Hood is a woman in your world, they were very wrong." The former mayor's eyes widened, her body going rigid. There was no way she could know about that, it wasn't possible.

"I think you're mistaken." Esmeralda shook her head.

"No, I'm quite sure that I'm correct. The minute that I felt your heart, I saw her face."

"I don't want to talk about her." She scowled.

"Regina, there's nothing wrong with-"

"Drop. It." The mother sighed. Resigned, she stood from the bed and moved towards the door.

"I fear that we may have moved a little too fast today. I meant not to pry, but I can see that I'm making you uncomfortable."

"Yes, you are." The former queen gritted out.

"May I see you later, then?" Regina turned her head up at the woman.

"I'll send for you if I should wish to see you." Taking no offense to her daughter's harsh words, Esmeralda merely smiled and shook her head. She mock bowed to her daughter.

"Of course, my queen." Regina's scowl deepened.

"Get out, mother." Realizing her slip of the tongue, Regina grimaced and flushed a deep red. Esmeralda laughed a boisterous howl as she exited the room.

"You are certainly your mother's daughter." She threw over her shoulder. The younger brunette fought the urge to laugh at her mother's words. Finally alone, Regina took in her surroundings. The room was a dark shade of red with a flurry of colorful tapestries hung on the walls. Golden sheers hung atop the canopy bed that she lay in, curtaining her from the ceiling. It wasn't her taste at all but she couldn't deny that the room held its own particular flare. Feeling the need to rid herself of her wrinkled clothes, Regina rose from the bed and looked around. To her right were gold embroidered double doors, and she ventured over to them. She made quick work of assessing the walk in closet and found that everything was colorful and drastically patterned. The brunette picked the most casual clothes she could find, settling on a deep purple skirt with a golden jeweled belt attached to it and an off white tunic that cut off just beneath her breast and loosely hung around her shoulders. The ensemble was much more revealing and summery than she was used to and yet she still felt a certain familiarity with the style of dress. Hearing a knock at the door, Regina quickly donned a pair of brown slippers and made her way out of the closet.

"Princess!" Before she could even get the door open, Raja burst through the doors and launched himself into her arms. He stood no taller than her bosom, his weight upon her weak body making her head spin. She stiffened, lightly patting the boy on the back.

"I'm so glad that you're alright, I was afraid that I had hurt you on our travel. Please forgive me highness, I meant you no harm." He said in a huff. Regina softened at the boy's obvious worry for her wellbeing. "I'm fine, Raja, there's no reason to apologize." She smiled. The boy released his grip and beamed up at the woman.

"You are much too kind, princess. Now that you're awake, would you like to explore the palace grounds? I can show you everything, even the city and the gardens. If it would please her highness, I would love for you to accompany me." His smile reminded of Henry when he was little, and she found that she couldn't deny him anything.

"That would be wonderful, thank you." He offered his hand and she took it, allowing him to lead her all throughout the palace. She followed him down endless hallways and winding staircases until they reached the balcony that looked out upon the whole city.

"Look your highness, from here you can see all of Agrabah!" The sight nearly took her breath away. High cathedrals with stained glass windows and clock towers with bells littered the streets, temples and domed buildings on nearly every corner. Palm trees grew in the market place, small monkeys sitting in their leaves. And just beyond the large city walls lay a vast desert with the sunset at its horizon.

"It's beautiful …" Regina whispered.

"It is yours." She sighed.

"No, it's not. I didn't come here to assume the throne, Raja. And besides, how can I rule over people that I don't even know?" The boy frowned.

"But it is your birth right. You are the long lost princess." Regina looked down at the boy, smiling sadly. "I'm not a princess, I'm just Regina. And you don't have to call me 'your highness' or 'princess', my name is just fine." Raja fervently shook his head.

"Oh no, I could never address you so formally. You are the future queen, I am just a peasant boy that works for the king, and I am beneath you." She tilted the boys head up by the chin to meet her eye.

"Well as your future queen, I command you to call me Regina and treat me as you would any other person. Can you do that for me?"

"Yes pr- Regina, if you insist."

"I do insist." She said, turning her attention back to the city before her.

"So if you're not going to take the throne, does that mean that you aren't going to stay here?"

"I haven't yet decided. There are many things that I still don't know about this place, or the people that inhabit it."

"I can tell you everything you'd like to know." He smiled.

"And how would a little boy such as yourself know so much?"

"I'm not a little boy, I'm 9! I'll be a man soon." The small boy puffed out his chest. Regina laughed at the gesture, tears gathering in the corners of her eyes. Henry had done the same thing when he was little, running around the house and telling her of his masculinity and strength.

"Of course, how rude of me. I would be honored if you would share your knowledge with me." And just like that, his beaming smile returned. Running a hand through his shoulder length raven curls, the boy began to speak.

"I found you just last month, but I didn't know how to come to you. The queen had told me not to startle you, that is why I discovered the human device used to send messages. And King Solomon told me that you read his book so I knew that you would understand when I sent the message. And your mother's dreams that she sent you, those were of our world. They were all memories of her past and yours, that's why you saw her with a baby—that baby was you. She's been searching for you since you were stolen, she never stopped. And when we finally heard word of the Storybrooke world, she sent me right away. And you were there!"

"And now that I'm here, what does the she intend to do?"

"We're going to get your real heart back from Alice, so that you don't have to be sick anymore. And we're going to defeat the queen of hearts so that you can be safe. And the king will step down from his long reign, he means for you to take his place."

"My grandfather, you mean?"

"Yes, King Solomon of the gypsies. He is a wonderful king and our people have prospered during his reign."

"You speak so highly of him."

"He saved my life; he took care of me when no one else would. He is the only father that I have ever known."

"What about your parents?" Raja's smile fell.

"They were killed during the wizard's war when I was 5. I was alone, until the king found me stealing in the market place last year. He remembered that my father was a knight in his guard and he made me his servant in the castle. And when I'm old enough, I'll be his squire! His majesty and your mother have made it so I never have to go hungry ever again."

"I'm happy that they found you when they did, i'm sure that they love you very much." Regina smiled. "They love you as well, pri-uh—Regina."

"So they've said."

"It's true, I know it. You are loved by everyone, I'm sure of it." The boy smiled at her with an innocence and assuredness that made the former queen sick to her stomach. Her attempted smile was more of a grimace, and she fought the urge not to cry. These people had an unnerving way of disabling her highest walls; she hated that more than anything.

"Not everyone sees me the way you do, Raja. But I appreciate the sentiment very much. "

"You're most welcome."

"Would you mind if I were alone for a little while, my dear? I'm very much enjoying spending time with you, but all of this is a lot to process at the moment and I need some time to think."

"Of course," As if never deterred by anything, Raja only smiled even brighter before throwing himself into Regina's arms.

"I believe in you. Even if you don't." Tears threatened to fall from somber brown eyes. She pulled the boy closer to her and kissed his head full of hair.

"You're such a special boy Raja, don't every let anyone tell you different."

"Of course, your grace." With a wicked grin the boy scampered off the balcony, leaving Regina to her own devices.

She'd felt her approaching before she'd even reached the balcony, but still her mother said nothing. Her back tensed as she felt her mother studying her every move. The sun had long since gone down, and Regina stood leaned over the balcony staring at the glimmering city beneath her. Even now, its beauty still took her breath away. The late night summer air hit her cheeks like a saving grace and she basked in the feel of it.

"Were you planning on saying something or are you just going to stand there all night?" She murmured in a tired rasp.

"I was merely trying to memorize all that I had missed," Esmeralda said, moving to stand beside her daughter on the balcony.

"You've grown into a beautiful woman, my darling. More beautiful than I could have ever imagined." "Thank you." Her voice carried in a whisper. Her thoughts clouded with an ocean of emotions that she'd yet to decipher. This woman was her mother, and she didn't even know her; but she felt like she'd known her for her entire life, like her horrible past never happened. It infuriated her to no end. Her mind was angry and hurt and confused and she shouldn't care about this woman—she should hate her because she'd abandoned her to a life that no one should have to live. But oh how her heart craved to be nurtured by her, she wanted what she never had; a mother who loved her. A son that understood her. A woman that loved her just as much as she did. Everything hurt, but her mother understood, or wanted to understand. But she just couldn't. She couldn't let this woman in to only have what was left of her possibly short time spent being loved by a mother that she'd always wanted, only to die and cause them both unrelenting pain. She wanted it all; her mother, her grandfather, her son, her Emma. She wanted her so bad she couldn't breathe.

"It's okay to love her. You don't have to be afraid to feel what you feel." Regina couldn't cry again—wouldn't cry again. Her lips quivered in trepidation and she shut her eyes tightly, bowing her head into her forearms on the balcony. The woman knew, like she'd always known her daughter's every feeling. "You don't understand." She rasped.

"Maybe not, or maybe I know exactly how you feel," Regina scoffed.

"How could you?" A shaky sigh escaped the brunette mother's lips.

"Before I met your father, when I just coming into my womanhood, I fell in love. And with a woman, no less," The woman chuckled. Regina did not.

"I had never been attracted to women and I haven't been since, but it was just something about her. The way she spoke, the way she laughed—everything about her was so perfect."

"What was her name?" The woman chanced a glance at her mother, still hiding in the crevice of her arms.

"Cornelia. She's one of the merfolk of Atlantis."

"I've heard that their world is beautiful."

"It is, one of the most beautiful worlds I'd ever seen. It was the first time that my father had let me travel so far away and I was only in my nineteenth year. I hadn't mastered my powers nearly as much as Raja has at his age, but over time I'd become stronger. And so I left home and went as far as I could, and I ended up in Atlantis. My strongest element is air so I was able to breathe just fine when I went into the sea."

"What was it like?"

"Unlike anything I'd ever imagined. I loved every minute there, and I never wanted to leave."

"So why did you?" Regina stood straight, now focusing on her mother.

"Cornelia was the queen of Atlantis. She was married to the king, and she loved him. She me as well, but she wouldn't leave him to be with me. And soon enough the king found out about us and wanted to have me executed, but Cornelia and my father would not allow it. I was a princess, after all. It would have started a war if King Triton had killed me, and my father's army would have slaughtered them—and for what? A young fool in love with a woman twice her age. I wasn't selfish enough to cause such a thing, so I left and I never went back. I haven't seen her since." Esmeralda did understand, better than Regina did herself. She knew what it was like to see the person you loved in the arms of another. The pain and heart break etched its way across her features; she was so tired of feeling like a lost child. "When did you stop loving her?"

"I never did. To this day I still love her very dearly, but I was lucky enough to fall in love again. Phoebus was everything I needed and he helped me in ways that i can't even begin to explain. He was everything to me, and so was Cornelia. But they were two separate parts of my life; who I was and who I became. I was courageous enough to love Phoebus because he was my happiness, and I wouldn't have given up that chance for anything in the world." She looked upon her daughter with a long, hard stare. Her eyes spoke volumes that Regina was not yet ready for.

"I might not see her ever again …" She whispered, a lone tear trailing down her flushed cheeks.

"You will see her again; I'll make sure of it. And you will love her fiercely with everything you have. I refuse to stand by and let you throw away what could be one of the best things in your life because of fear. Love is everything, my child. Don't run away from it." Her words were earnest and true and she said them with a pride emanating from her being. Regina wiped away her tears, looking up into the starry night sky. They reminded her of the blonde sheriff's eyes.

"She's so wonderful …"

"What is her name?" A smile that brightened her mother's eyes with adoration slipped across the younger brunette's lips. She looked to her mother with a twinkle in her eye.

"Emma."