Title: Things That Make Mulder Wonder or The Enigma That Is Dana Scully
Category: X-Files (MSR)
Summary: A whole pile of post-eps for episodes in season 6 and 7 (not necessarily every episode), revolving around Mulder's thoughts, particularly about Scully.
Rating: Strong PG… some sexual situations!
Spoilers: Spoilers up to seasons 6 and 7. You'll know if you read the title of each chapter which episode it pertains to.
Disclaimer: Not my characters, and I make no money off of this, but they would look great doing this.

Well, it is over. If you don't know by now, I wrote these a billion years ago, somewhere between the end of the series and the IWTB movie. When I started, I intended to post the entire series up within a month, however, this was written rather haphazardly and a lot of sifting through and editing had to be done to get it somewhat up to snuff (there are still many, many grammatical errors, which some day I may go back to fix). Also, real life got in the way, with career shifts, a toddler at home, and the acquisition of a rescue dog. I apologize for the sometimes slow updates. But, here it is, a year later, and that's all she wrote!

Some people ask if I would write more seasons, but I don't think so. Season eight was fine by me, flaws and all, but season nine lost me with the episode William. That's when the show jumped the shark in my mind, and when I realized TPTB just stopped trying. I watched William and Sunshine Days only once, many years ago, and have not watched either since. It seemed so trite to me. But, never say never, and who knows...

Thank you so much to all those who reviewed and cheered me on and gave me praise/criticism/advise. You kept me motivated and kept me smiling, and I think that's what fandom is all about. I appreciate so much the regulars, those who have stuck with it from the beginning, and those who found it halfway through. To all the guests, I'm sorry if I didn't answer your questions, I just didn't know how!

I hope you check out my other stories and my future postings. Enjoy this last chapter. As always, feedback is welcome, and much appreciated. Thank you :)

Requiem

He'd heard all his life, "if you love something, you have to let it go." He never understood that before, wanting to hold on to Scully tight with both his hands and his mind, wrapping her up in mysteries and conspiracies so that she would be too engrossed and involved to leave. But now…

"There has to be an end, Scully."

The words came out of his mouth straight from his heart. He once thought he couldn't continue the X-Files without her. He thought she would leave him if she left their work. But he knew the less quoted second part of that saying as well: "If it comes back to you, it's yours." She said she loved him. He certainly loved her. If he let her go, she wouldn't fly away. She would be safe and happy, and she'd never have to give up another thing for him and his quest.

He wondered if she knew how strong his faith in her was to allow him to suggest she leave the x-files.

He was relieved and upset to know that she didn't seem to like the idea any more than he did. But as she cried in his arms, he wondered if she too knew it was right. If she realized it was time, and realized that she was not well, and that he could tell she had not been for some days now. He wouldn't even dare think it was the return of….

Eventually her soft, quiet cries ceased, and his tears stopped as well. He wiped his eyes with the heel of his hand and sat up.

"Mulder," she said, shivering slightly with the loss of his warmth.

"You have to change."

He brought her one of his t-shirts, a sweatshirt, and sweatpants. They were the warmest things he brought with him. He unbuttoned her shirt, unfastened her bra and helped her slip the shirt over her head. He pulled off her pants and was about to slip the cotton jogging pants on, when she stopped him with a hand on his arm.

"Mulder," she said again. By now, he knew when he saw desire in eyes.

"You're not feeling well," he mumbled, half-heartedly. She leaned forward to kiss him, and his excuses were forgotten.

Their lovemaking was slow and gentle, and he kissed her tenderly as he stroked inside of her. He met her eyes and realized he'd never made love to a woman like this. It wasn't for the release, it was to be close, to be connected. It was to show love.

"I love you," he whispered, and she smiled softly at him and closed her eyes. She didn't seem at all close to completion and that didn't seem fair to him, so he maneuvered a hand down to rub her clitoris until she sighed and tensed around him, and only then did he allow himself to let go.

He curled up with her and as she slept, he wondered if he truly was as ridiculous as the investigative auditor made him out to be. Was he simply torturing himself and Scully, chasing a truth that would never and could never be found? Was he simply a waste of resources?

Images of Scully holding Theresa's baby, her natural, maternal nature, and the knowledge that she would never carry a child of her own haunted him and as the sun came up he knew something had to give. He would stop this, any way he could. They were right. The truth was not worth any more sacrifice.

She won't leave me, he thought to himself as he held her. She'll leave the X-Files, but she won't leave me. He got out of bed and showered and took her to her room to get dressed for what may be their last case together.

He was sure of it when he found her lying confused and scared on the forest floor.

Scully was never one to be commanded, and he was never one to assert any type of domineering masculine force upon her or take professional advantage of their personal relationship, but he would not let her return with him to Oregon under any circumstances. He used the truth to convince her.

That night he booked two tickets to Oregon, one for him, and one for Skinner. If she agreed to his request, he could agree to hers. She stayed at his apartment, hovering as he packed, uncharacteristically chewing on her thumbnail as he called to ensure the equipment he needed would be ready. She disappeared into his kitchen to make dinner as he consulted with the Gunmen online, reviewed his notes on the computer, checked a wide number of web forums and newsgroups and conspiracy sites.

"There are a number of witnesses and even some radar data that suggests there was an unidentifiable object in the vicinity of a fast moving navy airplane. The airplane was in the middle of practice maneuvers making its movements erratic and unpredictable."

"I am fairly certain that any alien technology that can allow them to travel this far could easily avoid a navy plane doing simple tricks in the sky, Mulder. In space there are millions of unpredictable objects flying about."

"What if… what if this UFO were damaged, or the crew otherwise occupied or…."

"Eat your dinner, Mulder."

He picked up his fork. He knew her tone, it wasn't dismissive, but she clearly didn't want to talk about it.

"What's wrong?" he asked, finally.

She sighed. "I just have a feeling. A very bad feeling. We've been… things have not being going well for us-"

"I think things have been going great."

"No, not personally, Mulder, professionally. I mean, with this threat of the closure of the X-Files, this whole thing with Billy Miles and Theresa Hoese, I'm not confident we know enough about what's going on. I'm not sure that you going back is a good idea."

"Scully, you know everything can disappear in a minute. There are people who want to cover this up just as much as I want to expose it. We cannot let that happen. If they shut down the X-Files, fine. But that can't stop us from doing our job. It can't stop us from the truth. Otherwise, what was all of this sacrifice for?"

She didn't respond, only went back to her dinner, and so he didn't comment further either. That night, however, she was hungry for him, and he wondered if her desire was born from the unease she obviously felt or if it was the knowledge that their relationship was shifting. After this, it was likely they would no longer be work partners, but life partners instead. Either way, he was pleased to oblige, allowing her to push him onto his back and take control for the night.

In the morning, as they got ready to go to the Hoover Building, she stood before him and he watched as she took off her chain.

"Here," she said, as he sat to slip on his hiking boots.

"What's this?"

"Every time I have needed reassurance, this has been there. You gave this back to me more than once. I want you to wear it."

"Scully," he said with nervous laughter, "I don't think Christ is going to help an old sinner like me."

"Humour me, Mulder. Please, I need… I need…."

"Okay," he said, holding her shaking hands still. "Hey, Scully. It's going to be okay. I'll bring this back to you in a day or two, okay?"

She nodded, and he let her clasp it around his neck.

It was too late when he realized his mistake. He'd been in denial, ignoring it for some time, but the brain issues he'd had earlier in the year had returned, carefully managed by drugs, and even more carefully hidden from his physician partner. That's what they wanted.

He stepped into the light in a daze, not thinking of the repercussions; he typically left that to Scully, which is what made them so perfect a team. They complimented each other. He would never leave her… no, not intentionally.

His last clear memories are of Skinner yelling his name and wondering if Scully knows he made a mistake. He didn't want to leave her. He never intended to leave her.