WARNING! SPOILERS! WHY ARE YOU EVEN HERE IF YOU HAVEN'T READ BOO?

Disclaimer: I don't own Heroes of Olympus or Fall Out Boy

Which reminds me – there's a song in here. Listen to it or don't.

The Blood of Olympus: An Epilogue
(Because Uncle Rick is a sadistic person who doesn't write the dam things himself)

Leo Valdez had prepared himself for lots of things. A salmon was not one of them.

After getting Calypso off Ogygia (Heck yes, point for Team Leo!), the son of Hephaestus had flown them directly to New York, stolen a newspaper, and checked the date.

He'd died on August 1st… His eyes scanned the page, ignoring the reports on freak weather activity that had happened on Long Island recently and ripped through the leaflets until he found the top hand corner that held the date.

Leo blanched. Next to him, Calypso sucked in breath as she read over his shoulder.

The paper said, in traitorous black ink: August 22nd, 2014.

Well, at least it was the same year. But Piper was going to flay him. Three weeks and one day! He figured they'd all have at least gotten over the bulk of the grief by now, and probably burned his burial shroud because he was 'dead' now. But Leo Valdez was far from dead, and he was going to make sure the world knew it.

Because Leo was all about doing awesomely impossible things. Even if those things would get him in deep schist with Roman's, Greeks, possibly the gods and maybe even some monsters too.

~Super-Sized McShizzle~

Leo set about planning how, exactly, to break this to his friends and the rest of the camp.

Rigging all the electronic billboards in New York to put a picture of his face on it and the words: Betcha missed the Valdezinator! was maybe not a perfect idea. Besides, who knew if any demigods were even in New York right now?

Gods… three weeks. He still couldn't get over it. Leo bet that, by the end of it all, he was going to wish he was dead. Everyone was going to slaughter him.

Calypso had had the best time exploring New York, though, and that made Leo happy. She was fascinated by how the world had moved forward, sometimes running across streets with vehicles going 60km per hour just to look at the displays in window shops. Someone honked her once, and she had sent him a look that said: Goddess crossing here, you schist. Move the flip over. The guy had taken off pretty fast after that.

She was the one who had come up with the plan to re-introduce Leo to the land of the living.

~Bad Boy Supreme~

Leo drilled one last screw into his construction before standing up and wiping his forehead.

"Done," he breathed, looking over what he'd made.

A black-screened TV almost as big as the Jumbotron in Time Square stared back, its supersized speakers making dull humming noises even though it wasn't turned on. Leo had no doubt he could easily get it into Camp Half-Blood and make his entrance so epic people would talk about it for generations. Percy crashing his own funeral? Psht, no. Leo was way too cool for that.

Not to mention his funeral had probably been weeks ago and he couldn't crash it if he tried.

Leo reached into his tool belt and brought out a control, flicking the green switch to call Festus. It was time to come back from the dead.

~Commander Tool Belt~

The Romans were visiting Camp Half-Blood. That was fine with Nico. He loved seeing Reyna and having Hazel sleeping with him in the Hades cabin. Percy and Annabeth had even come in from apartment scouring in New York to spend the last few days of the summer break at Camp.

They'd made extensions to the dining pavilion so twice as many demigods could fit in there, for when they had the Romans visit every month. Every two weeks the camps upped and overed to the other one, and this time it was the Romans turn to come to Camp Half-Blood.

It was lunch now, and the six of the prophecy, Nico and Reyna were seated at the Hades table. Chiron had screwed the rules for now and let them eat wherever they wanted, so the heroes of Olympus were gathered at Nico's table.

And one more person was there too.

Will Solace, head of Apollo cabin, was next to Nico di Angelo. They were holding hands under the table and kept stealing sly glances at each other. They'd started dating two weeks ago under the heavy guidance of Piper, Annabeth and Jason. They had basically set Nico and Will up for it to be impossible not to accept a stroll to the beach. Then Will had shyly asked Nico if he wanted to be his boyfriend and Nico had said yes after careful consideration and proof it wasn't a joke.

Everything was perfect.

But the loss of Leo still weighed heavily on their minds.

"So, Nico," Percy said, slapping pizza in his mouth. "How'sit in tha Udderworld?"

His face was so stuffed he could barely talk properly. Annabeth glared at him she cut her brisket into strips.

Nico shrugged in response.

"I wouldn't know," he replied. "I've been stuck here for three weeks under-"

"-Doctors orders," Will finished, smirking at his boyfriend. Nico rolled his eyes, smiling slightly.

"So you wouldn't have… you know," Piper said quietly, and the table's mood darkened as they all completed her sentence in their heads. Nico shook his head, his eyes prickling.

"No," he said softly. "I haven't seen him."

Jason took a deep breath and looked about to say something until a loud hiss interrupted. He swung around on his chair to face the entrance to the pavilion where the noise had come from. The sound of chattering demigods stopped abruptly as the ground just out front of the steps to the dining rotunda split with mechanical accuracy and something thin, black and huge started rising up.

At first Nico thought, Oh for Hades sake Gaea, just go to bed! Then he realised it couldn't be Gaea or anything Gaea-related, because it was simply a flat screen TV the size of a small wall. Speakers bigger than some of the demigods eating extended from where they were tucked behind the screen.

A song started playing. A loud song that Nico had heard somewhere before when the Hunters had visited not long ago.

Something by Fall Out Boy. It had a long title – like, a really long title. It didn't occur to Nico until the chorus started playing after they all sat there in stunned silence for a bit.

"My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark," he said, staring at the speakers that were blasting the words he'd just said. He shared adrenaline-pumped glances with the rest of the demigods at his table as the song continued into the chorus.

"Light 'em up up up! I'm on fire!"

Jason went rigid. Piper gripped the bench so hard it might have broken. Percy clenched his fists and swore colourfully while Annabeth exhaled loudly. Frank and Hazel shared glances that dared to hope and Reyna looked ready to punch something.

Nico was feeling homicidal. Will squeezed his hand for comfort, but looked prepared to kill a man.

"I'm on fire…" Jason repeated as the song continued. By now all the campers knew something was about to happen and they didn't dare move in case they missed it. Piper stared at the TV.

"It can't be," she said, her voice choked slightly. She didn't want to hope.

Suddenly the music dimmed until it was barely audible until it stopped completely and a face appeared on the screen. Breathing hitched and stopped completely around the pavilion.

Everybody knew the cheeky face of Leo Valdez. His grin, which was a million-watt as he stared out from the TV. His sparkling brown eyes that held ideas and restlessness and the curly dark brown hair that hung over his forehead. His white shirt and suspenders. His elfish ears.

That same boy was gazing out at them all.

"Sorry I'm late," Leo said, twiddling with something in his hands below the vision of the TV. His grin widened, if possible. "But you know how it is: dying, not dying, rescuing beautiful goddesses from islands." He scratched his head. "It must be Tuesday."

Suddenly he was shoved from someone offscreen and the campers only saw a flash of caramel hair and milk-white skin before Leo was laughing and back in front of whatever he was using to film.

"Anyways." Suddenly his face was serious. "I came to reacquaint myself with the living people who I call friends, who, hopefully, won't be planning to actually kill me because I've been MIA for three weeks and a day." He winced a little. "Believe me, I didn't plan on it."

He was quiet for a moment before he grinned again, making Nico's cheek muscles hurt just watching him.

"But I guess you all want to see me in the flamin'-hot flesh, huh? Well, wait no longer!"

The on-screen Leo then tipped backwards and for a second they didn't see him or the real Leo anywhere.

Then a Latino bundle of Hephaestus-made demigod swung down from the eaves above the Hades table, his shirt riding up around his shoulders and a shit-eating grin on his face.

"Tada!" He wriggled his hands in the faces of his friends. Then he dropped onto the table, put his foot in Percy's pizza, and swung around to take in the hundreds of Roman and Greek faces staring at him with varying expressions.

"Not dead!"

No, Leo wasn't dead. But something else was, and that was the fresh, raw salmon that sailed through the air and hit him smack in the face. He blinked as it slid off him and onto the table, then looked around to see Nico with Hellfire blazing in his eyes and his plate minus one fish.

Piper chose this moment to snap out of it and she leapt on top of the table and grabbed the front of Leo's shirt.

"Not the face," he pleaded, before she flung her arms around him and subsequently depleted him of all air. Jason scrambled onto the table, shoving another demigod foot in Percy's pizza, and grabbed them both and squished them within an inch of their life, ignoring the very squashed salmon at their feet and the fact Leo was soaking wet.

Soon, all the occupants of the Hades table were up and standing on it, Percy's pizza be dammed, and hugging Leo and each other, crying (Hazel), laughing (Percy) and dying from the inability to breath (Leo, Nico and Will).

"On fire," Piper said, her voice thick with emotion. "You little schist."

So, there we go. I needed closure, okay, don't you judge me.

Jasmine Out!