A/N – Set during episode 2.08 "Rhymes with Shout". If you haven't seen it, it might be better if you do as I reference a lot of things that happen without going into a lot of detail. Okay, I was asked if I would do a version of "Somewhere Along the Line" from Gabby's perspective. I wasn't planning on it, but as soon as it was suggested… my brain took over and started putting this together. So, I give you the companion piece to "Somewhere Along the Line". I hope you enjoy it and let me know what you think.


Plain and Simple


"I've been thinking about it, and um… the truth is, I don't know where I'd be without you…"

Gabriela Dawson could do nothing but curse herself as she sat in the back of the ambo listening with half an ear to Alan Chout go on and on about the awesome-ness that was firehouse 51. Granted, she had to give the guy credit for being totally on the money with that… but as she sat thumbing through gauze pads for inventory, all she could think about was the look on Matthew Casey's face just before the overeager spelunking enthusiast had burst into their private little bubble.

Damn it, Gabby… and you just walked out! What the hell had she been thinking? Wait… she hadn't been. Her heart had been thudding through her chest at the time, trying to get a handle on all the wrong ways she could possibly interpret Matt's meaning. There'd been no thinking. There had almost been a reaction… so it was better that she'd walked out.

She'd be the first to admit that trying to breach anything more than their friendship now made her a little wary. In fact, she'd told Matt that just the other day. I just feel like we've already been down this road, ya know? The last time she thought she'd had a handle on his feelings on the matter, she'd been flat out denied. It had been more painful than anything she could remember. And then… she paused in her thought as she stared helplessly at the gauze in her hand.

Oh just say it, Gabby… And then he'd gone back to Hallie. Granted, she'd been with Pete at the time, but it only made her play the 'What If?' game even more than she already was. What if there'd been no Pete? What if they'd gotten together and Hallie rejoined the picture? What if Hallie had never died? What then? There were so many questions, many of which she didn't deserve or really need the answer to… but part of her wanted all the same. The part of her that liked to remind her of the pain to keep her from retrenching herself in something that would never turn out the way she wanted.

Yet the other part of her liked to remind her that he'd been subtly and not-so-subtly trying to inch them back to the place they'd been at before that disastrous Christmas party. Every time they had hung out just the two of them over the past few months, there was always that air of something more in it – something hidden in the meanings and something heavier in the looks. Just the way it had been before. And it made her scared. But then… the look on his face as he'd stumbled out of that burning van earlier that day… His level of fear and concern for her had been eye-opening and his relief more than evident to anyone who had been paying attention, and it had made her speechless more than the fact that she'd nearly died.

Gabby let out a sigh, shaking her head as she realized she'd lost count in her inventory long ago. Her focus was good and shot. She threw the gauze pads back into the box and closed the lid.

"Chout, it's time for grub. If I stay in this ambulance a minute more, I'm going to scream," she said, zipping up the jump bag and throwing it onto the gurney. Before he could say anything, she jumped out of the rig and made her way towards the kitchen. As she walked in, she realized there was something missing.

"Hey, where's the chow?" she asked, noting the lack of dinner time aroma. Severide grumbled from his perch on the counter.

"It's coming. She'll be here," he bit out. Gabby just shook her head with a smirk before starting over to the table, her eyes meeting Matt's briefly before they both looked away quickly. She internally cursed herself yet again for acting like a 3rd grader… But then Capp caught her attention by waving her over.

"Ah, Dawson. Bring that beautiful brain of yours over here. I need some help with this. If I don't finish this I owe Bennett on first shift a twelve pack." He held up a book of crosswords. Gabby smiled.

"How could I refuse a charmer like you, Capp?" she asked. He grinned at her as he pushed out the chair next to him.

"You can't," he said with a wink. She smirked.

"Nah, never can resist a half cut of a twelve pack," she told him with a return wink. He pretended to stab himself in the heart with his pen.

"You hit where it hurts, Dawson," he said with a grimace.

"No, I hit where it counts. Ya want my help or not, big guy?" she asked. Herrmann snorted a quick laugh.

"Just take pity on the guy, Dawson. Your flirting is making me nauseous," he said.

"I second that… but then I'd be more nauseous if I'd eaten anything," Otis said wistfully.

"She's coming!" Severide bellowed from the counter. Gabby held up her hands in surrender and nodded to the crossword while taking a seat next to Capp. It would be enough to keep her entertained, occupied and not thinking of the person sitting at the end of the table.


"Chout, you're a really nice guy, but the thing is… I'm taken."

Gabby walked wide-eyed out to where the ambo was parked, hands stuffed into her jacket pockets. She could hear Chout following, but made no effort to hurry him along.

You're taken? Where the hell had that come from? The second it had come out of her mouth, it had felt right. Like it was more than just a dodge for unwanted attention. Her mind went immediately back a few months to when she'd told Pete Mills truthfully that she didn't have the answer he wanted when he'd questioned her feelings for Casey. It had always been between them, no matter how sincerely she'd been in the relationship. It was those very feelings she was battling now. She'd meant it when she'd told Matt that she had no expectations, that she wanted to be in his life as a friend. It had been a reassurance for him, because of what he'd just been through, and for her, so that she could fill that spot in his life without sacrificing her own feelings. But it was becoming more and more apparent that it was just a smoke screen, a verbal talisman of sorts, to keep everything in check when needed. Then Jay had come along, and that had helped. A physical reminder that Matt Casey and friendship were what mattered the most. But that had blown up spectacularly in the middle of it only to go out with a whimper in the end. Maybe dating just wasn't for her right now. Maybe Shay was right: men were the problem. Gabby would have chuckled at that, until it reminded her.

Shay… another rabbit hole.

Gabby used the drive back to 51 to center herself again, as if two of the most important people in her life weren't throwing her for constant loops. As soon as she parked the rig, Chout was out of the rig like a rocket. Not that Gabby could blame him, as he was the victim of a very recent shootdown. She wouldn't want to stick around for small talk either.

After a quick report back to the chief, she went to go find her things. Shift had officially ended 20 minutes ago and there were deliveries waiting at Molly's. As luck would have it, Matt was just finishing in the locker room, along with her business partners.

"Hey, it's Betty Crocker! Those home ec classes finally paid off, huh?" Herrmann grinned.

"Hey, Chute wants me to tell your cake pan story on my next podcast, apparently he's a big fan of the show," Otis told her. Gabby smiled. Well, apparently she hadn't crushed Chout's enthusiasm for life. Smart guy. She looked past the guys to see that Herrmann and Otis had so helpfully found her bag for her, and quickly tried to squeeze by Matt. It was more awkward than it needed to be, but they hadn't spoken since the interrupted moment in his quarters. And she wanted to say something to him – to tell him it was okay, to explain her own motivations to him this time. But her bag was being thrust at her.

"Hey, c'mon, let's go. Change at the bar, we're late for deliveries," Herrmann told her, completely unaware of the tension within the small space. Duty called, and she gave him one last fleeting look before following Otis and Herrmann out.


She, Gabriela Dawson, was a coward. Plain and simple. After Joe Cruz had announced his spur-of-the-moment impending nuptials, she'd done her best to escape after two celebratory rounds. Otis had moaned about being left alone with the rest of the 51 crew when they arrived, but she reminded him she was working the next night's shift with Zoya. Underneath it all, though, she just hadn't wanted to be around all of the raucous, joyous celebrations that were sure to ensue. It wasn't that she was taking out extra insurance that she wouldn't run into Casey. It was partly the fact that it was hard for her to stomach that Cruz could be so blissfully happy about marrying someone he barely knew and she could barely keep a years-long friendship in one piece after everything they knew about each other and been through together.

So, instead of smiling through the celebration, she sat on her couch in her comfiest of clothes and poured herself a glass of wine. The first sip was calming. Just what she needed. But the siren call of her phone… it was stronger than the wine. To call? To not call?

Picking the phone up, she felt the edges of panic and slammed it back down again before giving it a glare. Stupid. Don't call him. This is not the time to be having a heart to heart conversation. Really? If not now, when?

She picked up the phone again, taking a sip of wine again as she looked at it closer. You're the one that made this awkward today, Gabby. He was telling you something. You heard it for what it was this time and then ran at the first opportunity. She took another sip of wine. It's you that's going to have to fix this. With a sigh, she stood up and stormed into the kitchen. For what, she didn't know. But, the pacing seemed to help. He was telling you he wanted more… what is it you want? To be safe or to have that chance?

Gabby stopped pacing as an idea formed in her head. She'd go back to Molly's. It was early yet, the party was likely not even in full swing yet. If Matt was there, the stars would have finally aligned for their talk. A serious talk. If he wasn't, well then, Gabriela Dawson would have a good time.

With this in mind, she did her damnedest to get ready. Someone was going to eat their heart out tonight. Who it would be was really dependent on the timing – as seems to be the ultimate factor in a lot of her relationships as of late. So, in her best little black dress and lips a daring fire engine red, she plucked up her Dawson courage and made her way to the door, more and more confident that this was the best plan.

Nothing could have surprised her more than to see Matt Casey standing outside of her door. He looked just as surprised as she was, until he really looked at her. That surprise turned immediately into something else, something way more heated. She stared at him, staring at her. And it seemed as if everything seemed to click in her head. She was in love with Matthew Casey. Plain and simple. There was no maneuvering around it, no renaming it or running from it. All signs had been pointing towards it, and she would be even more of a coward to run away now. Safety was over-rated. If this was the only chance she got with him, then she'd grab onto it with both hands.

When he finally kissed her, she realized that maybe he was doing the same thing.


End


A/N – Alright, that was a short little companion piece. I hope it was satisfactory. I apologize for any errors, I cranked this out pretty quickly. I may revise this sometime later, but I'm happy with it for now. :)