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思考

It is an important thing in business to avoid the involvement of emotions. I've watched people make disastrous errors when they allowed their emotions overrule common sense. I've seen even more people gain advantage by provoking strong emotions in others. As I've gotten older, I've learned that emotional involvement–– whether it be in business or in my personal life–– is like trying to handle a poisonous two-headed snake without getting bitten.

Back at the age of 28, I made the mistake of stirring up someone else's emotions to achieve my own ends. Ironically, as I was warning him about the dangers of giving in to unnecessary emotions, I was in over my head myself.

No, it wasn't love, not that ridiculous emotion. I'm not quite sure what it was. A young man who was called Fei Long, the "Flying Dragon", had much potential, but was slowly being crushed by his unstable foster family. He possessed a brilliant inner fire that first drew me to him. I thought I could give him the push he needed to break free, but I did not expect to be thwarted by his foster-brother, Yan Tsui. Yan's possessiveness and wild jealousy of Fei Long, drove him to gun down his own father in cold blood.

Nor did I suspect I would be betrayed by Fei Long's true father, Tou, who had tasked me with "rescuing" his son from the Liu Family; only to reveal later that his true motive was to permanently remove Fei Long from ever becoming a threat to him.

The Dragon's wings had been cut off. Now grounded, he refused any help, preferring instead to wither away in prison. At that point I should have washed my hands of the whole distasteful ordeal, but I arranged for one of my own to watch over him anyway. Why did I do that, I wonder? Fei Long was obviously a lost cause.

Perhaps I was curious if that inner fire of his could be ignited once again. To watch him rise again–– not as a dragon, but as a phoenix born from the ashes of its own destruction. I would have relished seeing that.

I'm being sentimental, aren't I? What a useless emotion.

I made it a point to avoid any potential emotional entanglements after that. Those within my inner circle would have me marry and produce an heir. I have no interest in this, as I do not believe bloodlines guarantee a worthy heir. The Liu family is evidence of that.

麻見 隆一

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The years passed by. Before I realized it ,I had reached the age of 35–– although at times I felt much older. Life had become routine. I was considered a success in the business world. As for my other world... let's just say it has its occasional challenges. It is a continuous cycle of power struggles and I was presently in the midst of one now. In a rather bold move, an unknown gang was attempting a territorial takeover. They bought off one of my managers and then had him arrange for a Diet member's secretary to be photographed buying drugs at one of my clubs. Their real intention was to damage my reputation by exposing my ties to the underworld.

I used my connections, along with several costly bribes, to keep the photos and the story from being published. Despite this, multiple warrants were issued to search my property. We tracked down the photographer, a young man by the name of Takaba Akihito, in an attempt to discover the identity of the informant. Takaba proved to be a tough kid. Not only did he resist giving us any information, but he managed to break loose from my two assistants, Kirishima and Suoh. That was a rather impressive feat in itself, now that I look back on it; but at the time I only remember being annoyed at the inconvenience he was causing us. We thought we had him once we cornered him on the roof of a tall building, but he escaped from us–– by jumping off the roof.

I was unnerved that this kid had foolishly thrown his life away so carelessly. I looked over the edge of the building expecting to see his broken body on the sidewalk below, but instead I saw him clinging precariously to a sign on the side of the building. Caught by surprise, I couldn't help laughing as he boldly taunted me. A crowd began to form below him, so we were forced to retreat before anyone could take note of our presence.

麻見 隆一

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Further digging revealed that Takaba was acquainted with a detective by the name of Yamazaki who worked in the organized crime division. We were certain Yamazaki was the one tipping off the photographer, but we needed to find out who was passing on that information to Yamazaki. We arranged for fake information to reach Yamazaki's ears about a large drug shipment that would be coming in at one of the container warehouses. No doubt he would tip off the photographer again. I planned to kidnap Takaba. Once Yamazaki discovered his pet photographer had disappeared, I had no doubt he would go looking for the informant himself... and my men would be following close behind.

As for the young photographer, he would soon receive a lesson from me he would never forget. I was looking forward to it. The kid had awakened something in me that had been asleep for a while now. I hadn't felt that kind of exhilaration in a long time. And it had been a while since I last laughed out loud.

How rare.

He was a surprising creature. His physique was much to my taste, although that dyed hair of his–– along with the defiant attitude–– was not. I would never allow someone like that to treat me with such insolence.

The dyed hair and the defiant attitude... how interesting. I just felt that surge of exhilaration again. I must find something attractive about it after all.

Of course I can't allow myself to be distracted by petty desires.

I will crush that rebellious attitude of his.

麻見 隆一

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My men were not only investigating Yamazaki, but they had also done some surveillance of Takaba as well. Other than his work and drinking with a couple of his friends occasionally, he didn't seem to have much of a life. There wasn't a girlfriend. One of his friends, by the name of Koh, had a habit of spontaneously hitting on females. The other, named Takato, had a fiancée. They were concerned that Takaba showed no interest in finding anyone, even asking in a roundabout way if he might perhaps be gay. After responding to that in a violent manner, Takaba told them that he had no interest in relationships, and could not see what the big deal was about sex.

The poor boy had a very low libido. What a shame. Therefore, I decided the best way to punish him would be to sexually humiliate him by treating him as a submissive. BDSM play was also something I had not indulged in, for a very long time.

The fake drug deal scheme went off as expected and I soon had Takaba Akihito in my possession. I had set up an improvised "S/M dungeon" in an abandoned warehouse office, not far from where we caught him.

To work around his low libido, I planned to use stimulants on him, known as "poppers".

It was gratifying to watch the shame grow on his face once he regained consciousness and realized he was restrained, with his most intimate parts exposed and on display for me. There are several variations of BDSM play and I introduced him to them, one after another, in an effort to break him. But even in the midst of some of the more hardcore acts, he held on and remained defiant.

And then, after a long while... finally a crack.

I don't think it was any one thing that I did, just that my persistence had finally worn him down. The defiance in those bright eyes of his began to fade. Suddenly, I had no urge to take it any further. His tears stirred something deep inside me, and now my desire was to comfort him. I kissed him and he responded with enthusiasm; although it was likely against his will, caused by the influence of the stimulants. The long session had left me so strongly aroused that I couldn't resist taking him right then. He was already sore from the abuse I had given him earlier. It's always painful the first time a man is penetrated anyway so it couldn't be helped, but I still tried to ease him into it. His whimpers from the pain mixed with occasional moans of pleasure were an intoxicating combination but I still stayed in control.

Until Akihito cried out for me to take him harder, deeper... begging for me to make him come.

When I am acting in the role of a Dom, there are certain rules I follow. I always remain fully clothed when I am with a sub. I stay cold, cruel and in control as I provide pain and pleasure. I never risk becoming intimately involved by having sex with a sub, and I certainly would never have an orgasm in a sub's presence.

I broke all the rules that night.

Regrets?

I have none.

麻見 隆一

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It took a couple of days before Yamazaki made a move. Meanwhile, I held onto Akihito.

I had clearly crossed the line with him, so I avoided touching him again after that. I kept him well-fed and comfortable. Well, as comfortable as you can get being handcuffed to a cot. At first he was in a rather foul mood, which was made worse by a nasty headache–– an aftereffect of the drug I had used on him. He was quite lively with his curses toward me. I was pleased to see that this wild animal had not been tamed. Once he quieted down, I tried to educate him on the mistakes he made that had gotten him into this situation. Number one on the list was that he was far too trusting.

We learned there was no informant. Yamazaki was being paid directly by a rival yakuza group to assist them in my takedown.

We discovered Yamazaki had a young daughter that required expensive medical treatment, costing more than a detective's pay could handle. That's what first drove him to strike a deal with the yakuza. However, it had been more than a year since the daughter's surgery, and she was fully recovered. The lure of easy money is difficult to resist once you get a taste of it. It seems he could not break the habit.

Now that I had this information, there was no need for me to detain Akihito any longer. I released him on the morning of the third day.

Within minutes after I released him, I received a call from Kirishima informing me that Yamazaki had been spotted in the area, meeting with the yakuza group. If Akihito was seen by them now, there would likely be trouble. I told my assistant to call the police and warn them that one of their own was working with yakuza, and was about to take down one of their informants. The last thing I wanted to do was to involve the police, but the chances were not good that Akihito would survive if I attempted to bring in my own men and ended up provoking a turf war. I grabbed my gun and went looking for Akihito.

It didn't take long for me to locate him. Unfortunately, he had already run into Yamazaki. I stayed in the shadows and listened to their conversation. Ever trusting, Akihito did not want to believe that Yamazaki was involved with yakuza, but he promised he wouldn't say anything, regardless. After all, the detective had been looking after him since he was a teenager.

Yamazaki's response was to pull a gun on Akihito. Damn him!

I knocked Akihito out of the way and fired at Yamazaki, hitting the hand that held the gun. It was fortunate for him the police were on their way, otherwise, I would have killed him. As it was, I didn't need any more complications.

The police came and began their crime scene investigation. Yamazaki confessed without hesitation, and told them he was willing to testify about the yakuza group's illegal drug trafficking in exchange for a lesser jail sentence. That solved all my problems rather nicely.

All but one–– Akihito.

I watched the different emotions play across that cute face of his. At first, he was shaken by seeing guns come into play for the first time in his life, and then it hit him that Yamazaki had betrayed him.

Tears flowed freely down his face. "He used me."

What could I say? Welcome to the grown-up world. Help yourself to a hot cup of cynicism and drink up.

No, now was not the time for cruel sarcasm.

I told him I wasn't certain Yamazaki would have actually shot him, but there's no knowing what a cornered man will do.

I had an odd impulse to kiss those tears away, but I chose to affectionately ruffle his hair instead. That didn't go over too well with him. He irritably slapped my hand away.

"How can you be so calm?! You just shot a cop!"

"Better him than you," I told him, which then led Akihito to the shocking realization that the "bad guy" had just saved him from the "good guy".

I was rather amused at this thought myself.

I had indulged myself long enough. Unfortunately, it was time for me to say goodbye to Akihito, and return to my own world. I had enjoyed the diversion while it lasted.

"Don't think I've forgiven you because of what you just did! I'm going to get even by exposing you as the criminal you are... AND I'll get rich from the scoop!"

Oh? After all the things I did to him, he still intends to pursue me?

What a reckless boy.

I look forward to meeting him again.

麻見 隆一

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Libido: a person's sex drive; the urge to seek satisfaction of sexual needs. BDSM: overlapping term for bondage/discipline, sadism/masochism, and dominance/submission. Dom: in BDSM sex play the term is used for a "dominant", a person who sexually controls a sub. sub: in BDSM sex play the term is used for a "submissive", a person who is sexually controlled by a Dom (male) or Dommes (female)

Cynicism: a belief that all humans are basically selfish and dishonest, only caring about their own self-interests.