Pairing: Tom/Rachel

Category: Romance, Angst.

Rating: T

Word Count: 1,149 words.

Content Warnings: Adult themes.

Spoilers: Take place at the start 'No Place Like Home' and contains references to 'Phase Six' and 'Trails'.

Summary: Tom couldn't believe such a simply act could be so intimate. Tom/Rachel. 'Scene Tag' to Tom and Rachel vaccination scene in 'No Place Like Home'

A/N: I'm calling this a 'Scene Tag' and it is a stand-alone at the moment. While I could definitely move forward with it I'm torn between doing that and moving on to some other scene's that are just begging for a tag… basically every Tom and Rachel scene.

LSLSLS

Tom felt like he had been physically struck by the immense intimacy of the once standard and not very much relished act of receiving a vaccination. But now that the world and everything they had all once known had been turned on its head, now that it was her pressing that needle into him… everything about this act had changed.

The slight pain of the thin needle piercing the skin was somehow translated by his brain as pure unadulterated physical pleasure. He held his gaze glued to her features, unable to look away from the woman who was the source of the immense emotions currently assaulting him.

He couldn't remember sex holding as much feeling and intimacy as when that needle pierced his skin, infusing him with the product of the blood, sweat and tears she'd shed over the last months. The contents of that tiny syringe represented so much pain but at the same time all the hope in the world…and it was her creation…that he was privileged enough to be receiving from her very own hand, here alone in his cabin.

He wasn't alone with her very often, at least not in such a private setting, add to that the sudden all-powerful emotions that he was currently being bombarded with and it was causing the mother of all internal wars to rage within him.

They were on their way home. For real this time, after so many false starts and mislaid hopes this was real. They had it. The Cure, and they were really going home with it. And home was where his beloved wife, children…and his father, hopefully awaited him…healthy and safe. All of them. That was his hope against hope anyway, but there was ample reason to worry that it was just too much to hope for in the current climate. The thought of not being able to find his family…or worse finding them too late; sent a stab of pure terror straight to his heart.

He didn't know what he would do if he lost his children…his wife…he loved them with every fiber of his being. His love for them was a large part of what had kept him going these last weeks since his and everyone else's known world had crumbled. A fact others might have trouble reconciling as he had turned away from his family…quite literally…to follow Rachel down what many had quietly and not so quietly believed was a rabbit hole of false hope that was stealing their last hope of ever being reunited with their families.

But he had known, or at least he had believed, for the men and woman on this ship, for their families back home and for the entire human race, that all of their best hope's lay with the woman standing before him. The woman who was now looking for all the world like one of the most beautiful sights he had ever seen.

He would be lying to himself if he did not admit that in truth; twinges of feelings, the tinniest seeds of lust and love, had been present from their very first meeting. Easy to ignore at the time, write-off as a normal male response to encountering a very beautiful female, even if it was a somewhat stronger reaction than he had experienced in similar situations in a very long time. And looking back he could admit that Rachel had not been the only one engaging in active avoidance during those first four months she had been on his ship. Though their reasons had been somewhat different at the time.

Throughout those four long months those twinges had remained, present every time he saw her, brief though all those encounters had been. But he had stamped down on them each and every time, refusing them permission to multiply and grow.

The first time he felt those twinges start to expand beyond his remotest ability to control, he was finding out the world had all but come to an end and it had of course been all too easy to bury the knowledge of those seeds taking root under the mountain of anxiety and anguish the revelations of that day had born.

Brought back to the present, his gaze having not strayed from her for a moment; but the strength of newly discovered emotions having compelled his focus inward, now returned to study her features. It was only then, after dragging his minds focus away from the waves of emotional intensity roiling inside him, that he saw she had completed her task and had lifted her gaze to meet his.

Yes, those seeds had been there between them for months and they had been growing stronger unchecked these past weeks…but still they were lowly compared to the all encompassing knowledge assaulting him now.

He could swear he felt electricity spark between their gazes. He watched her take a deep steadying inhalation, exhaling outwards on a quiet but ragged breathy sigh, exactly as a lover would when the level of lust and emotion in an intimate moment rose to overwhelming. Their eyes remaining meaningfully locked. And in that instant he became aware with absolute clarity that every emotional revelation that was unfurling inside of him at their earth moving yet accidental intimacy was unfurling inside of her as well.

She was feeling all of this too. Emotional intimacy, almost completely belying the physical and at a potency unlike anything he had ever dreamed could be possible to come upon one so quickly.

But that was the cause of his internal war, how could he be feeling this towering inferno of awareness for this woman when he was also feeling the strong invisible pull of the connection he held with his beloved wife with every mile the Nathan James travelled closer to her…? Shouldn't the latter emotion greatly overtake the former in intensity?

These feelings and pulls were entirely different and seemingly intent on pulling him in different directions. He could not seem to explain them any more or better than that, even to himself.

And it made him feel sick with disloyalty. And that was something he could not be…lest he loose himself, because loyalty was his defining self when all else fell away…and he would hold on to it. At all cost.

He knew the choice he had to make, he just never, from the moment he had met his wife, ever anticipated having to make it. He had certainly never anticipated such a decision being remotely difficult.

But Darien would remain his in body, love and promise but she was not the only woman holding a place in that particular part of his heart now and that was not something he had ever expected.

No, nothing would change outwardly…but everything might have changed inwardly…with one act…one act hiding abundant love and intimacy, sealing an emotional connection that could never be physically fulfilled.

THE END.