Edit 23/10/2014-This is a fun little gender bender fic that as the original AN notes was conceived from consuming egregious amounts of alcohol with friends and us all being nerds, my characterization may be a bit off at times simply due to the fact that this starting out as nothing more then a oneshot that's grown into oh so much more. So with that in mind, enjoy the ride as we follow Lillith Potter and her happily dysfunctional family as they turn the magical world upside down for their personal amusement.

Original AN-So one of my best friends showed up last night to cut my hair while my buddy Jake was over and we all got talking about Harry Potter, I got very, very drunk and woke up with this written. Sooo...enjoy?

Harry Potter was having a rather rotten week, be it from the simpering ministry flunky running his Defense Against the Dark Arts classes, the unending line of detentions he'd accumulated over the past few days for speaking the truth about Voldemort, or having to deal with his best mates rather mercurial temperament, it all ended with him unhappy. So when he walked into his potions class it was not really a surprise to anyone when he reacted to Malfoy's insistent needling, the reaction though was memorable.

"Hey Potter, looking good, what did you do all summer, cry like a woman and cut yourself?" Ah Draco, now there was a case study on daddy issues, not really deigning it necessary to respond to the barb Harry attempted to move around the blonde ponce and his bookends. Crabbe and Goyle were as imposing and vapid as ever, he really had no intention of dealing with the illiterate trio but they moved as a unit to block his and Hermione's path to where Ron was seated. Gritting his teeth Harry finally let the summers worth of abandonment fueled rage bleed through,

"Malfoy...get the hell out of my way before I demonstrate in person what I did to your darling dark lord when I was an infant, now bloody MOVE!" None of his targets really reacted to the statement, for her part Hermione tensed up a bit and dropped her hand to her wand, bless her paranoid heart. Sneering again in a manner that just annoyed Harry further the blonde retorted,

"Are you trying to take the piss out of me Potter? You can't do anything to me, my father-" and with that Harry finally had it, he just couldn't take it anymore, utilizing every enraged abused and mistreated feeling he had wound in his psyche he performed an act of wandless magic that would have caused Merlin to applaud. All at once Crabbe and Goyle went flying to either side of the room seeing as they were inconsequential to Harry's ire, Malfoy though was thrown to the front of the room his robes melting around him as his hair turned a rather tasteful shade of violet.

A tableau of glowing magics spun around the room as Harry vented his rage, no one not even Dumbledore could have reeled in the boys anger at this point, after a time the miasma of energy bled off and the room was left silent. As the storm settled Harry was still standing there quivering in fury with Hermione grasping his arm staring at him in awe, they were both now occupying a rather impressive crater in the stone floor and a certain blonde was magically crucified on Snape's blackboard stark naked and sporting a rather impressive indigo mullet.

"Potter...forty points from Gryffindor for assaulting classmates," Snape, of course it had to be Snape, always waiting in the shadows to bestow blame on those defending themselves against his charges. Not really believing he was about to do what he had planned he turned to the greasy git and snarled,

"Fuck you Death Eater," and with that he grabbed Hermione's wrist and pulled her with him to his seat next to Ron. Every eye in the room was on him, no one knowing quite how to react, Snape pulled his wand out and in a few motions brought his dungeon back to normal while also freeing the ferret from the blackboard whilst transfiguring him new robes. No luck on the mullet though, pity that. Eventually Snape's vitriol laddened gaze met Harry's and he cooly said,

"Fifty points from Gryffindor for disrespecting a professor," Ah, that's how it was, meeting his gaze Harry just smiled grimly as he replied,

"What part of 'Fuck you Death Eater' did you not understand, Professor?" Opening his book he ignored the world around him as Snape said he'd involve the Headmaster, 'Good, about time the old man paid some bloody attention to what was going on around here'. Out of the norm Hermione partnered up with him and kept casting concerned looks his way, eventually sighing He gave in and asked her what was wrong.

"What wrong?! You're having to deal with Heinrich Himmler's reincarnation as a Defense Professor, you spent the entire summer feeling as if you were abandoned by all your friends after witnessing a classmate being murdered by the man who betrayed your parents, and then you perform an act of wandless magic that would leave every witch in existence hot and bothered all while openly mocking an authority figure?!" Her breathy rant ended when she ran out of air, huffing a moment she just shook her head as she got to work on their project.

He really hadn't the foggiest idea what he was working on, at this point Harry was seriously just tossing shite into his cauldron to occupy his mind, after a few moments of silence Hermione finally continued, "I'm worried about you Harry, I'm very worried about you and I don't know what I can do to help. You seem quite intent on making things difficult for yourself." He really didn't have anything to say to that, honestly she was right what could she do when all he wanted from life at the moment was to beat Snape and Voldemort to death (in that order) with his bare hands.

Mulling this through his mind he didn't notice Malfoy glaring at him from the next table over, really it wasn't his fault, the prats newly acquire violet lockes cowled most of his face in shadow anyway. With a rather impressive feat of silent magic Draco cast several items into Harry's cauldron while he was talking to his friends, Harry glanced up at the bubbling piece of cookware for a moment before shrugging and moving on. As class wound down Harry took a sample from the cauldron and walked up to Snape's desk placing the wax sealed vial before the Death Eater.

"Drink it, Potter," the man rather sardonically stated, Harry scrunched his face up and was about to deliver another rather poignant 'Fuck You' when the professor continued, "Its a simple 'Pick Me Up' potion Potter, if you messed this up you're truly pathetic." Grimacing Harry decided to throw in his obligatory insult regardless of the situation,

"Fine whatever you greasy git," unknowingly earning more points from his classmates with this statement Harry downed the vial and tossed it on the desk letting the glass shatter, seriously what did he care at this point. As he walked away his stomach began cramping and he fell to his knees, after a moment he began screaming in agony, he'd experienced something like this before, a transfiguration like polyjuice potion. But this was different, it felt like he was being torn apart at the cellular level.

As the world spun around him he fell on his back and continued to scream, oddly enough it sounded like his voice was lowering in pitch the entire while, eventually the world swirled back into focus and after a while he managed to pull his long raven tresses from his face. Wait...what? His hair was now at least a quarter meter longer then it had been before and as he looked at his hands he realized his fingers had thinned and were a bit longer as well, glancing over his breasts he saw the class staring at him in shocked horror.

Wait. His breasts? What? Trying to stand shakily both Ron and Hermione rushed up to him trying to help him balance, "What...what happened?" he asked in far too light of a tone, his friends exchanged a glance then Ron looked at him completely befuddled,

"Mate yer umm...yer a girl." Oh, lovely, why not, so with that he was dragged to the hospital wing and was thrown underneath the microscope...wait no, wizards didn't do that science thing, thrown under the wand of Madam Pomfrey. Hermione and Ron never left his side and even poor Neville stood their glancing at him in horror, more then likely thinking it could have easily been him who fell to Snape's vengance.

"It wasn't the Professor you dullard!" Hermione snapped at Ron, she looked truly frustrated as she kept leafing through her potions book like it would answer all their problems. "Seriously Harry wasn't paying any attention to what he was brewing, for crying out loud he threw in a crocalisk gizzard!" Nodding Harry shook his..her...ugh...whatever, HER head and agreed with the young woman,

"She's right Ron I wasn't doing anything even remotely related to paying attention, sure Snape forced me to drink it but he had no idea what the hell I concocted...I seriously doubt anyone does really." Neville for his part looked a bit indignent,

"Now come on Harry...errr...do we still call you Harry? Anyway we all saw Sn..Snape force you to take that potion, he didn't even LOOK at it before he dosed you, thats some serious negligence right there." Hermione nodded at that not arguing the point, the Professor had no right to force Harry to take the potion and the end result rather proved that point, with a huff the bookworm slammed her tome shut as she looked at her best friend apologetically.

"I'm sorry Harry I have nothing, I think you may have accidentally created something that no one has a counter for," Harry shrugged her shoulders at this, really it didn't surprise her at this point, seriously as danger and violent filled as her past four years had been why should she be caught off guard by something as mundane as a gender change? After a while Dumbledore and Madam Pomfrey showed up both looking solemn,

"Harry..." the old man started with a concerned tone, he glanced to the trio accompanying him but he quickly realized they'd know what was said regardless and continued, "The potion you made was...unique, none of the staff are quite sure what went into its brewing and I'm sad to say you are more then likely stuck in this form for the foreseeable future, I'm sorry my boy, I truly am." Grunting in annoyance Harry dropped from the bed and paced a bit, eventually she just rolled her eyes and said,

"Just keep Malfoy and his creeps away from me and we'll be set Professor, I doubt this is permanent but even if it is there isn't much we can do about it...did it to myself anyhow..." Shrugging she continued "I suppose I should pick a new name...just call me Lilly for the time being, sure mum would like that..." Dumbledore looked at her with an appraising gaze then nodded knowingly.

"Very well young lady, you'll obviously have to be transferred to the female quarters but that can wait for now, I'm sure your friends have some acclimating to do so I'll leave you with the promise that I will try to fix this, take heart in that." Once the professor left, and Pomfrey suitably babied her Lilly was released in the care of her friends, pausing a moment she closed her eyes in consternation before speaking,

"Ron...Neville...I need you two to go ahead of me and move my stuff into the common room so I can switch dorms, I'll meet up with you in a few." Nodding solemnly the two young men walked off, looking over to Hermione Lilly smiled sadly, "I need something from you that is going to put a very real strain on our friendship Mione." Looking concerned the bushy haired girl cocked her head in question, sighing Lilly continued, "Umm...you're going to have to explain that whole menstrual cycle thing to me..."