BlueMoon Goddess: I was reading a book full of steamy short stories last night and I saw one that screamed Kisshu and Ichigo. And of course like my fic 'Fixation' Kisshu is purely human. In my stories and if I write a lot of Kisshu and Ichigo fics, he's always going to be human, not alien, sorry. But anyway this is my first one-shot for Kisshu and Ichigo so I hope you enjoy it!
Disclaimer: I don't own the plot I used for this story. I also don't own Tokyo Mew Mew or its character's they belong to Mia Ikumi and Reiko Yoshida.
"Fine, if you won't talk to me or let me make love to you…then just stick your honey pot out the front door so I can taste you. At least feed me something dammit!"
Ichigo's jaw dropped, her fingers went limp sending the glass plate tumbling toward her marble floor where it shattered and flew in a thousand directions, her dinner landing everywhere. She closed her eyes trying to block out the fact that her neighbors had just heard Kisshu's outburst. She was beyond embarrassed from his words. That and adding to the fact she'd never heard him get angry or raise his voice, but now he had just told the world he knew her more intimately than some men knew their women and he wasn't even ashamed.
Ichigo's body started melting at the thought of what that man could do with his tongue then it trembled at the memory of their steamy nights together. Since she had broken up with him, she was surprised by the loneliness of her empty bed. Now after three months of holding it together, she wanted to give in, wanted to fill that emptiness and her bed again. Contrary to popular belief, the devil didn't have a pitchfork, pointed tail, horns and a red suit. He came under the guise of a surprisingly tall, lean, green-haired young man with enough fire and passion to start a five-alarm fire. Kisshu's expert tongue belonged in the porno hall of fame and his dick techniques would put dildos and vibrators to shame. His masterful hands could drape across her skin with whisper-soft touches or grip her in the waves of a thundering orgasm and keep her in place until he was done giving as good as he got. He navigated the soft recesses of her peachy skin and the even softer folds of flesh with unmatched expertise, cherishing her curves and enjoying every inch, exploring her each time as though it were the first.
And Ichigo had given him up.
Her wavering resolve, coupled with the fear that Kisshu might say something else that would put it all out there for her neighbors, should have stirred her to action. Instead, she stood motionless in the center of the living room floor, her bare feet covered with bits of cake and icing from her strawberry shortcake she'd gotten for a late-night snack. Struggling between desire, common sense and logic, Ichigo broke down. She wanted to be with him so badly it tore her apart.
'Why is this so hard? Why do I miss him so much? Why do I feel so lonely even though I'm doing the right thing?' She questioned herself.
Her phone rang, interrupting her thoughts and giving her a slight reprieve from the confusion and pain. When she grabbed the receiver, her next door neighbor/friend's voice came through loud and clear.
"Ichigo, you're seriously passing this guy up? You must be outta your mind!" Moe said. "Morals or not, if it'll soothe your conscience, don't look at it as oral sex, just a way to ease the itch, give him some ass so we can all get some sleep!"
Ichigo could imagine Moe's face flushed with color with every uttered word. She wasn't the only one losing shut-eye. Ichigo had been sleeping with Kisshu for nearly two years, with an occasional dinner and hang-out thrown in for good measure. Then misery began three months ago with six simple words: "Kisshu, I can't see you anymore."
His expression crumbled, causing her heart to restrict then pound wildly. A sudden stab of pain flashed through the muscle in the center of her chest that signaled the ultimate sign of life. Deep in her heart she knew she didn't mean a single word. Everything in her life was going haywire. Her finances had taken a serious nosedive and her place of work was laying people off left and right causing her to go into a state of panic. Her life at the moment was a stalemate at best, inching backward. She needed a change of pace, to get her life back in order and focus on herself for awhile. And the first step was cutting out the greatest distraction in her life, Kisshu.
She had decided, after she broke up with her then childhood sweetheart Masaya Aoyama for infidelity, that being alone was for the best. She couldn't even think of dating anyone else, afraid of being wronged again until the gorgeous, green-haired man started working in her department four years ago. Two years ago she caught an elevator with him and a few months of always catching the elevator together he found it a lot easier to pursue her. Just looking at his devilishly handsome face she knew that he was trouble. And she was right, she had heard of his reputation outside of the office as a guy who only used women like they were his toys and then tossed them aside when he was done or bored with them. And yet from that alone she still didn't resist him. She felt warmed when his unusual golden eyes drank her in the moment she walked past his cubicle.
Ichigo was also glad that he wasn't the type to boast of his conquests since speculation rang high, and she'd like to keep it that way. Where she worked was in an office building downtown and the company was extremely conservative. She wouldn't lose her job over an office romance, but she could gain the disapproval of people who signed her paychecks and that would be unfortunate. He was only two years older than her and boy could he make love like no one she'd ever known. Technically the only other person she'd been with was Masaya but hell she might as well have been a virgin after the way Kisshu had pleased her. And for Ichigo, his talents stopped there, even if he claimed to truly love her. She was hell-bent on a man that wouldn't use her like she was his plaything and then toss her aside.
And yet as he stood in the center of her bedroom that day when she told him it was over, she watched him fight for control, which truly surprised her. This couldn't be the same man she heard about whom always tossed his women aside when he was done with them. But finally, his handsome face, reflecting only calm, looked up at her as he asked. "Why?"
Instead of stating the real reason, she said. "Because I'm not going to have sex again until I get married." This was still somewhat of the truth.
Kisshu didn't blink. "Then marry me, what's the big deal?"
Shocked that he would be so easy about things, Ichigo searched his face for signs of humor.
"I didn't say that to get you to propose to me. I want to find a man who doesn't have a reputation, a man who doesn't play around with women's hearts."
After Ichigo broke it off, Kisshu refused to stop seeing her even though she returned his gifts and wouldn't take his calls. For ten minutes every night for more than three months he stood just below her bedroom window calling to her in that soft voice she had come to love.
"I just want to be with you. I want to marry you. Just let me in…talk to me Ichigo, we can work through this."
Some nights he said he missed her, needed and loved her. Kisshu sounded so sincere, but Ichigo knew that getting back on the right path required some sacrifices. Sex with him was one, and oh what a sacrifice! Then her neighbors started commenting on Kisshu's nightly chants. They were the talk of the block, with men hoping Kisshu would take the hint to move on because he was giving them a bad name and the women cheering for him, praying he'd get positive results because it was romantic. Much to Ichigo's chagrin, people actually began placing bets. The stakes got higher every night when Kisshu walked away with no results. One night Moe finally banged on her door.
"All right, spill it. What the hell has he done that you're leaving that fine specimen of a man out in the cold like that?"
"He hasn't done anything." Ichigo said, stepping aside to allow the blonde young woman into her townhouse.
"He didn't hit you?"
"No."
"Try and steal the goodies?"
"No." Ichigo chuckled at the last question. "He was really good to me. But I'm trying to focus on me right now and he just came and diverted me from that. Plus after hearing about how he operates and being hurt by Masaya, I just can't be with him."
Moe paused in the middle of taking a seat and stared at her friend. "And what does that have to do with getting some dick?"
"Sex is out of the question, until I get myself situated."
"Please, all you did was start a little fling." Moe snapped. "Look I understand you've been hurt before but come on, you've told me yourself that he was better than Masaya and has Kisshu actually stepped out on you when you two were together."
'Point taken.' Ichigo thought. "But how would I know that down the line he would cheat or start getting tired of me?"
Moe leaned back on the sofa. "Has he given any indication that he was growing tired of you?"
"Well…"
"Just what I thought." Moe said with a grimace. "You need to put aside your fears and just let him love you. Hell if you don't want to be with him in the way you want, at least be with him to fill the physical aspects."
Other people Ichigo knew with even less of an argument tried to convince her to give in as well. But Ichigo held fast. The men on the block thought a woman couldn't go without sex for more than two months. The women knew better. New arguments and a different betting pool began. Ichigo stopped going to block parties and the meetings, especially since the meetings and chattering at parties began to be about her and Kisshu. All the while, Kisshu kept trying to whittle down her defenses. When his words didn't work, he serenaded her. That would've been beautiful, if he could sing. He must've recently been listening to Robin Thicke because Kisshu sang from "Lost Without You" to "Get Her Back," which by the way sounded pitiful, just pitiful. His singing made her smile though, but also a little sad.
She was surprised at how much she missed him. It was just sex right? Mind-numbing, toe-curling, speaking in tongues, out of this world sex, just damn good sex, only that.
At first Ichigo had been afraid to go to work, thinking there would be problems. But Kisshu looked at her only if she happened to be nearby and never made a scene. She looked at him, wanting him, longing for him. Kisshu respected her space. He knew personal confrontation had no spot in the workplace. He brought it to her doorstep, or more precisely outside her bedroom window. Kisshu's voice was the last thing she heard before falling into restless sleep and the first thing she remembered when waking in the morning. Not to mention the single red rose, which he laid on her doorstep each night and which greeted her every day as she left for work. Romantic, nonthreatening and persistent, Kisshu was making things so hard for her. Why couldn't he just leave her alone and accept her decision? But then did she really want that?
She kept her mind focused on her work and kept her legs closed and her mind on herself. The memories of the smooth, sensual, but comforting way Kisshu treated her made him a temptation and pure torture at the same time. He was the reason she did so much praying. Then came the depressing realization that at the rate she was going, she may never find a suitable guy for her. Ichigo accepted the fact that she would be alone for a while. Not a pleasant thought, but she had made a choice and planned to stick to it…until tonight.
Out of pure anger and frustration, Kisshu had yelled out, "Well if you won't talk to me or let me make love to you, then just stick your honey pot out the front door so I can taste you. At least feed me something dammit!"
Then Moe's words kicked in on her phone line. "If it'll soothe your damn conscience, don't look at it as oral sex, just consider it an even better way to relax."
Ichigo started to protest, but Moe didn't give her a chance. "Quit playing around Ichigo and give the guy some loving! From what you've told me he's been good to you. He's also been out there trying to win you back and you've been playing hard to get and looking like damn-it-to-hell the entire time. Now get on with it. Give him some nookie and give us all a break! Cause if you don't, I'm gonna fuck him so he doesn't go to waste."
Ichigo didn't need any more encouragement. Hell, she'd been thinking some of the very same things. She quickly cleaned the mess up off the floor, then hurried to freshen up and slipped into one of the nightgowns Kisshu loved. The red lace always made his eyes light up. She scrambled down the stairs two at a time like a kid at Christmas, hoping she wasn't too late. He never stayed a minute longer than ten. Ichigo believed he timed his nightly visits to be there just before her normal bedtime. Anticipation welled up inside her unlike anything she could remember as she took a long, slow breath before opening the door. Kisshu stood in his usual place next to the front porch looking up at her bedroom window. All of his ruggedness looked so damn good. His sexy lips, nice features and forest green hair made him look even more handsome. Ichigo felt the moisture pool between her thighs and her heart did a flip as she found she could actually breathe again.
Kisshu's golden eyes, always his most dangerous feature, looked tired and sad. He'd apparently experienced a few restless nights too. His jaw went slack then snapped shut. His moist lips parted slightly and his eyes widened as he turned and gazed at her standing in the entrance. Scanning her face first, those intense golden eyes traveled over her body as though committing every inch to memory. He slowly licked his lips then sprang into action, embracing her warmly before lifting her up, then placing her gently on the cool floor. Smoothing the silky folds of her nightgown out of his way, his tongue trailed the soft length of her thighs to the dark nestle of curls that signaled the center of her universe. Every curve, every stretch of skin, every fold of flesh tingled at the touch of his hands, first with a loss of sensation, then an awakening that filtered through her body like a slow trickling scream. A sudden movement and seconds later he buried his head into the quivering flesh, providing the much-anticipated return to normal pleasures, a return to sanity. Cupping her ass in his warm, massive hands, he snaked his tongue out, flicking across her pearl in quick, short bursts, then a slower steady rhythm.
An almost feral growl escaped her lips. Gripping his head, she thrust upward, moving herself across his tongue as he encircled the lips, shaking his head from side to side and leaving a trail of fire with every movement. Ichigo arched lifting the rest of her body from the ground. His hand reached out, steadying her, holding her. The orgasm hit hard, building from the base of her womb, shooting down to her legs and numbing them, preparing them for the next burst of pleasure. The moisture trickled at first then rushed out to greet his tongue with a hearty, 'Where the hell have you been?'
Kisshu stayed down there so long she had to beg him to stop. After making her reach orgasm a couple of times, he lifted his head. "I want you." Warm hands stroked her backside then a single finger branched out to touch her pearl. "I want this."
She opened to him, allowing his body to fill the space that rightfully belonged to him. A sudden shadow that appeared on her driveway reminded her that they were on the front porch. Thank goodness it was enclosed or the world would've received an education that night! Ichigo was certain the neighbors would take bets on that.
"Let's take this inside." She told him.
Picking her up, Kisshu carried her toward the door. They didn't make it past the spot just inside the doorway, barely allowing the door to close. The sound of material ripping echoed through the foyer. Seconds later, the hard length of him pressed at the center of her thighs demanding entrance. She opened to him, trembling with anticipation as he thrust into her moist heat, her flesh gripping him like a long-lost friend. His hands splayed across her hips, guiding every move as he kept them joined, working in a slow, steady rhythm. The hands trailed along her flesh, holding her as though he had found pure gold, thrusting into her heat with long, measured strokes. Their lips joined in a frantic rush of pleasure as his tongue, laced with her sweet nectar, explored the soft confines of her moist mouth. His lips were softer than she remembered. He tore them away, teased them down her neck to her chest and lingered lovingly on her breasts, tasting them, teasing them as though her moans were his only source of life and nourishment.
His fingers gripped and held on to her for dear life as he took her to the edge of reason, then tipped her into a pleasure-filled oblivion. Ichigo thanked God, Buddha, Confucius, Allah, Jesus, covering all the bases, for any and every member of reasons and maybe even ventured as far as speaking in tongues for a few minutes. She damn near blacked out, but her body and mind held on, unwilling to miss a second of his touch, a second of his feel, a second of release only this particular dance could provide. Her fingers laced in his dark, green hair, then trailed down his back, resting on the base of his spine. She moaned as her thighs lifted, wrapping around him tightly, shaking with every thrust following as his rhythm increased. The tempo became driving almost animalistic, branding, pure ownership.
"This is mine, mine, all mine." He whispered into her ear.
She couldn't agree more.
Several hours later as they lay wrapped in each other's arms, her back began protesting against the hardwood floor. As she stood to take the party to a softer place, every part of her body ached and felt good at the same time. Kisshu stood and watched her walk up the stairs. Ichigo turned just in time to see him pick up his clothes, holding them steadily in his hands, as he held her gaze for what seemed like forever. Neither spoke. She thought of what happened and for a split second she believed she'd used him and felt a twinge of regret, but only for a second. Finally, he realized she would remain silent and he slowly lowered his jeans with his briefs still tucked inside and stuck one leg in. He was never one to pres her for more than she wanted to give, and she realized that this time wouldn't be any different. Ichigo always admired that about him.
Telling herself that she had already messed up a three month sexual fast, she might as well do it all the way. As she watched him get dressed to leave, she extended her hand.
"Kisshu…come upstairs with me." She could make up for it tomorrow.
He halted, searching her eyes wondering if she meant it.
She nodded.
He dropped the rest of his clothes and took the steps two at a time. As he embraced her again, she wrapped her arms around him, holding him as close as possible, savoring the scent of sex surrounding him. It felt so right, absence didn't make the heart grow fonder, it made the dick get stronger and the sex last longer. Kisshu kissed her passionately as he carried her to the bed. This time his lovemaking was so intense that letting herself flow with him took away her sense of reasoning. They made love until the orgasms caused a three-second blackout, pleasure overload. That had never happened before. Kisshu wasn't bullshitting this time, not one single bit.
After they burned every last ounce of energy, they slept. And for the first time in months the sleep was hard and dreamless, comforting and safe. Ichigo couldn't walk the next morning and to tell you the truth, neither could he. They missed work that day and the next day they established a comforting routine of making love, then falling into more coma-like sleep. Ichigo wanted enough memories that would last until…when?
The next day, luckily for them was the start of the weekend they finally came up for air. They showered together before she fixed a hearty breakfast. Kisshu always had a healthy appetite. That morning, since she was equally famished, Ichigo almost made a career out of cooking. Meanwhile, the man could barely keep his hands off her, wanting to hold her or kiss her, showing her at every possible turn how much he had missed her. Feeling lighter and refreshed, Ichigo had to admit, she had missed him too. She didn't feel so…lost…unsettled…alone. He felt good to her, just him holding her was right and it wasn't just the sex, it was him being there.
After their two-day makeup marathon, they ate, then talked and talked. Well mostly he talked having so much to say that all she could do was listen and that too was unlike him. She had known him for his quiet strength and reliability. He told her everything that happened during the three months they were apart, but it was his last words that got her attention.
"Ichigo, don't send me away again, let's talk about making this work. Let's talk about what bothers you so much about me." He reached out, gently stroking her face, his finger trailing a fiery path. "I love you."
Kisshu never said anything he didn't mean and she knew for certain that he meant those three words.
No words came to her mind to say she felt the same. He opened his mouth to speak, but she tried to interrupt, preparing to halt any further words of love. "Kisshu…I just don't think "
"No, Ichigo." He said sharply. "Listen to me for a change. I've had enough of how you've sidestepped the real issues here. We need to find some common ground. I need to get some things out in the open. This time you will not brush me off. You will listen."
Holding her hands, his tenor voice was strong, sure and his manner kept her a willing prisoner. This was a first for her. She was normally the one to say what would and would not happen. Evidently things were about to change and she didn't know how she felt about that. As he gazed into her eyes, Kisshu almost dared her to disagree. Ichigo felt a little flustered and opened her mouth to say something, testing his strength. She didn't get a sound past her lips as he leaned forward and circled his tongue in the opening and silenced anything she had to say. When he pulled away, Ichigo was a little miffed, but she also secretly admired what he was doing. She'd always taken pride in her stubbornness, so she prepared to say something anyway. This time he leaned forward, kissing her even more passionately until she couldn't think straight, then he pulled away once more.
He watched her. Dared her.
She sighed but remained silent, brewing a little, but respecting him and his wishes. He didn't rant and rave the way some people did when they wanted to get their message across. Kisshu used a calmer method to get her attention and make his point. The corners of his mouth drew up into a slight smile as he watched her frustration. Taking several deep breaths, she remained silent, waiting. His smile widened as he pulled her even closer, his deep, resonating voice penetrated her heart. "Give me a chance Ichigo, that's all I ask." Kisshu took a long slow breath. "I didn't want to pressure you and I almost made a mistake. I'm not going to let it happen again." Pulling away, he placed his finger under her chin, gently lifting it until her eyes met his. "I won't make that mistake again." His voice sent shivers up and down her spine.
Ichigo wanted to say something, but thought better of it. His kisses were dangerous and effective. After a few moments, he pulled away going straight to his clothes. He searched through them until he found a small velvet box. He opened it, turned around and handed it to her. A ring! And it was simply beautiful!
"Believe me when I say that this is not a friendship ring." Kisshu said as she stared at it, mesmerized by it. Surely anyone could tell by the size of extravagant jewel on it that it surely wasn't a friendship ring.
When she didn't reply, something in his expression crumbled. He dropped his shoulders and looked away. "I'll get you something better if you don't…like this one."
All Ichigo could do was shake her head and stare at the size of that diamond. She knew it had taken a few of his paychecks to buy. She knew exactly how much he made. A few times, in between layoffs his entire paycheck came her way. She never had to ask, he would just say, "Take what you need, it's a gift not a loan." She didn't love him, didn't want to play with him or his emotions. She'd done enough of that already. Every time she got on her feet again, she returned every penny, but he always found a way to get the money back into the house one way or another, paying her bills ahead of time, buying things for her house or for her. Kisshu was a good person, but the only thing they had in common was amazing sex. Ichigo had never considered him permanent mate material because of the things she heard about him. She had been comfortable with the way things were and saw no reason to change, until her need to change her life around took over.
Glancing at him, she thought about his proposal. She thought about him: handsome, so very handsome, sweet, kind, loving and passionate. She felt a sharp pain pierce her heart. She couldn't take his ring. He deserved her honesty. "Kisshu, I care for you, but I can't say that it's more than that."
He crooked his mouth into something that wasn't quite a smile. "I know that, honey." He said, stroking her face gently. "I know you try to keep it that way. You've never talked to me about your true feelings or even tried to explore what we have. I still want to be with you. It'll be all right. You'll love me in your way. It's only a matter of time."
Amazed at his determination, she silently studied this gorgeous, generous man.
"Ichigo, you're the only woman I've ever been with who made me want more in a relationship. I might not be the man you think you need, but for the last two years, I've been more than enough. You've shared some of your feelings, your good times and bad. You've shared yourself." He smiled warmly, stroking his hands across hers. "I might not have a lot, but I would have the world if I had you." Kisshu looked different as he poured his soul out to her, stating his case with confidence and strength.
'Why didn't I see this before in him?' She thought, listening to his words. 'How had I missed it?'
"Even though you've held back sometimes, you've always thought about what I wanted too." Kisshu kissed her gently on the lips. "I've been with other women and I know when a person tries to use me. You never did, even when I gave you everything I had. I know you even stopped mentioning when you needed help because you knew I wouldn't take back the money." He shrugged sadly. "It hurt me when you wouldn't come to me. You know I would give you anything. I've always considered you mine and not just someone I sleep with."
Ichigo winced because she'd been trying so hard to keep her heart safe, that's all she saw him as, a sex partner. The guilt washed over her. She wondered how often the man had looked at her, read her, understood her.
Kisshu glanced at her, taking in her grim expression and lowered his gaze. "Maybe you saw things differently, but all I know is that you've shown me in many ways that you really care. And you give yourself to me in a way that's pure." Ichigo looked away, but he softly turned her face toward him until she was looking deep into his golden eyes. "Helping you is the least I want to do for you. That's what a man does for the woman he loves."
Shocked and moved by his admission, she found it hard to breathe.
Kisshu placed his warm hand over the delicate curve of her fingers. "I want to show you something." Pulling a slip of paper out of his pants pocket, he presented her with the receipt for the ring. Scanning the description, she noticed he had scratched out the price. She smiled. Kisshu wasn't trying to impress her, that's how he was…simple, honest and giving. He wanted her to see the date of the purchase, two years ago. He had been holding on to the ring for a long time, long before she decided to stop seeing him!
Speechless, overwhelmed with emotion, tears welled up in her eyes and overflowed down her cheeks in spite of her best efforts to keep them at bay. She wanted to pull away, but his embrace kept her in place. He brushed his lips gently across her cheeks, licking away the tears one by one and reaching deep into her soul. Slowly lowering to one knee, he kept her hand in his.
"Ichigo, will you marry me? I understand how you feel. For a while I'll just have to have enough love for the both of us. Anything you want is yours. I need you and I know deep down you need me too."
Her heart raced and hurt at the same time. Her emotions wouldn't allow her to speak or even whisper a single word.
Kisshu's eyes were intent in their constant contact. "I never asked you before because I was afraid of what your answer would be." His gaze lowered slowly. "If you said you wouldn't marry me, it would prove you weren't looking at me as a man, you only saw me for how great the sex was." He shrugged. "I wasn't ready to hear that. I wanted you to see that I could be so much more to you. At times I thought you did."
He stood slowly, linking their hands. "Before you stopped seeing me, you'd treat me like a husband, loving me, listening to me, caring for me, cooking dinner for me every night, making sure I had everything I needed for work." His beautiful smile tugged at her heart. "You didn't have to do that but I needed it. I needed you." He kissed the back of her hand, sending shivers of pleasure through her body. "It's hard to find a woman with the right combination of everything. I had to do this Ichigo I had to make things right for us. You've always been my everything…my life."
He wrapped his arms around her as she laid her head against the beat of his heart, his deep, resonating voice penetrating her soul.
"Darling, my apartment has been the loneliest place since you've sent me away. That's why I'm here every night, standing outside, not trying to hurt you. I'm only trying to make my way in. This is where my heart is, you're holding it hostage. You always have, but you've been too stubborn to see it." He began stroking her back. "If you had another man I could understand and I'd let this go. But just focusing on yourself and not being happy in the process isn't a reason to push me away. Marry me and do whatever it takes to make you feel good in the process. But don't let this go." He entwined his warm, strong fingers with hers. "Marry me and make me happy and I'll make you happy."
Even after listening to him, Ichigo was still hesitant. Though on the inside she was smiling at how the simple things she did meant so much to him. She did them naturally because he appreciated everything and was so sweet to her. When she placed a meal in front of him, he savored every bite, even the new dishes she tried strictly to please him. He enjoyed them mostly because she took the time to do it for him. The thought made her tremble as reality struck. She realized that maybe the fact that she felt settled and more peaceful when Kisshu was with her said it might be something more. The everyday relationship was far from the fireworks she had experienced with Aoyama, but those fireworks had made her do some foolish things and she'd ended up getting burnt in the end.
She reached up to touch his face, fingers trembling as she tried to hide her emotions. "I'm scared Kisshu…really, really scared. This is so different than what I want. So different than what I expected. I'm afraid and I don't know how to stop being afraid."
"You think I'm not afraid too? This is the first time that I've ever felt this way towards a woman and I feel weird. At first I believed this was all about sex and that I couldn't want more from you than that. But after spending so much time with you, I realized that I want more from you than just sex…I want everything there is about you."
Ichigo searched his eyes for a moment as the real reason she had held back for so long came to the forefront. "Kisshu…I don't know how to say this…"
"Just say it. We're laying it all on the line now."
She swallowed hard. "I probably won't ever love you as much as you love me."
He winced just a little, enough to know that she had hurt him again. Then his sexy lips lifted in a small, bitter smile. "Has that ever really been a problem?" He kissed her fingertips. "Open your heart Ichigo, stop trying to find excuses. If it wasn't me, it would be some other guy you'd push away for the very same reason, or one like it." Kisshu pulled her into him. "I won't hurt you…hurting you would only be hurting myself."
At those words she began to cry. Tears that she never knew she'd held inside, tears for him, tears for all she'd missed out on. He leaned in, kissing away the salty wetness flowing down her cheeks then held her until her sobs had passed.
"I'm not unreasonable about things you know." He said after a moment. "We can always talk and work things out, my parents talk all the time." Then he laughed. "More like argue and fuss, my mother is no joke with a rolling pin."
Ichigo laughed with him.
"But they've been together since they were fifteen." He took a moment to let that sink in. "Mom wasn't in love with Dad at first, but it happened and no one could tell the difference, not then and not now."
With that, he curled her into his arms, carried her to bed and made love to her so tenderly the only thing she could do was cling to him, hold onto him and admit one thing: it was better to have a man who loved her more than she loved him, than to be as lonely and miserable as she had been for the past three months. Ichigo opened to him slowly, allowing him to penetrate deeply, then he froze, pulling her to him, holding them connected, sensually, completely as he whispered over and over, "My life, my love, I love you, I love you…"
Within a few weeks they were married, with their close family and friends looking on. Ichigo's neighbors actually used the money collected from their bets to buy the newlyweds wonderful wedding gifts.
Kisshu was right. Ichigo fell in love with him a little more each day. She appreciated him and his unwavering love for her. He was a good friend, a good provider and a damn good lover. What more could she ask for? Content with what they had, he loved her like no other, always treating her like a queen. She accepted him as her true love and soul mate while watching him become stronger and more confident in their relationship, the way she wanted him to be in the beginning when their affair began. The way he always was, but was afraid to be with her. She became happier, softer, and more loving. All because she just let Kisshu love her.
BlueMoon Goddess: Alright I hope everyone enjoyed this. I feel so happy about how this came out, probably because this wasn't so much focused more on the lemon but had some romance in it as well. And I hope Kisshu wasn't too OOC in this and he appeared to sappy. But hey, I think he can be sappy if he wanted to be. Also I have plenty of one-shots in store for this pairing so in the future, look out for them!