What We Never Expected

I would like to join Aziraphale and Crowley in dedicating this story to…

- My dearest friends in FEF, especially Vanessa (who got me into Good Omens)

- Mandi (who exchanged excited ansaphone messages and left much encouragement)

- Stefan (whose patience and careful note taking helped me edit this story.)

- The Gaiaonline Summer Writers Thread, who made the first draft of this possible one word war at a time.

A/N: I thought Crowley's reaction to the Spanish Inquisition in the original Good Omens was both heartbreaking and intriguing. This fic is slightly AU since it was the eighteenth century Crowley slept through, not parts of the fifteenth and sixteenth. I thought it was an interesting "what if" scenario! Without further ado, read on, dear viewer. And review if you can think of anything to say! Thanks!

Prologue: The Arrangement

1020

A small, lonely campfire burned under a cloudless, starry sky. Up ahead, a full moon was hanging alongside the stars. All was quiet in the desert. That was a surprise, considering how two opposing armies had just been fighting earlier on that day, in a great battle that would go down in history as one of the Crusades.

In front of the fire, two men rested. Or at least, they appeared to be men. If one looked closer though, they could see that there was something more than human about them. One of them had yellow eyes, with slit pupils. His dark hair was almost unnaturally black – especially for spending so much time in the sun. He was sitting closer to the fire than the other figure, whose golden hair almost glowed with an ethereal presence. The blond had a pair of blue eyes that nearly matched the sky exactly noon time, when it was the brightest.

They had no idea why they were meeting at the same campfire, since the two of them were on opposite sides. Polar opposite sides, as a matter of fact. One couldn't be more opposite than a demon and an angel.

The blond eyed his only company very suspiciously.

"Now what was it you were saying again?" the angelic one named Aziraphale asked. He hadn't heard the other man. He'd been lost in thought.

"I said, that the two of us work too hard sometimes," replied the dark-haired one, whose name was Crowley. "I mean, honestly. My side tells me to go up here and make trouble, right?"

"Yes, and you're surprisingly good at it. I mean, really, dear." Aziraphale could only sigh as he spoke. "You broke five swords today."

"And then your side orders you to come down here and do some good," Crowley continued on the same subject, but never the less smiled when Aziraphale mentioned his handiwork.

"Yes, and I pride myself in what I've been able to do." Aziraphale stated. "I lost count of the amount of lives I saved today. I was able to heal most of them using their methods of medicine, with my touch, of course."

"What I want to know is... why are we the only ones who have to come here to earth?" Crowley said. He sat up, basking by the campfire as he looked up into the sky. "If they really cared about who was influencing who, then they'd send a legion from my side to tempt every human. And probably a legion of yours try and thwart us, of course."

"What exactly is your point?" Aziraphale asked, also sitting up.

"My point is, that I don't think either side really wants to win. At least not right now." said Crowley.

"Oh, come now-"

"There's only one person from each side: you and me. What difference are we really making, compared to the ineffable nature of humans?" Crowley asked. He'd taken this time to sit uncomfortably close to Aziraphale, causing the angel to inch away from him.

"We're making more of a difference than if we weren't here." Aziraphale said, a tad defensively.

"Okay, so we're making a dent in things." Crowley admitted. "But we can't really tip the scale, right? So why keep trying?"

"I'm not surrendering, if that's what you're getting at." Aziraphale said sharply.

"I'm not talking about surrender, angel." Crowley moved in closer again, and whispered in his ear. "I'm saying we watch each other's backs. We don't win or lose. We stay in the game and we stay on earth. It will be more interesting that way."

"So, are you suggesting we form an alliance?" Aziraphale raised an eyebrow and his face screwed up into one of confusion. "With all due respect, I don't think it would ever work."

"Why wouldn't it?" Crowley asked him. "It's not like we have to switch sides or anything." The very idea of going back Upstairs made Crowley wrinkle his nose. "We just do what we've always done. Think about today! You did heal me and then I made that archer miss you."

"Well, as long as I have my powers, I heal everyone. I can't pick sides." Aziraphale answered, a bit testily. "And you were smiling when that archer missed his target. You were just having fun, but I suppose..." Aziraphale grumbled, and then he paused. He recalled the last battle they had faced. "I suppose I could at least thank you for today, but don't expect it a lot."

"What about my suggestion though?" Crowley asked. He didn't want to appear as if he was ignoring the angel's thanks, but he wasn't sure what to say in response to it. It's not like that happened every day.

"What about it?" Aziraphale snapped.

"How about we stop kidding ourselves, thinking that we save each other by accident?" Crowley asked. "We're both men on an island. Well, men-shaped creatures on an island. But we don't have to be on the island alone."

Crowley held out his hand. "What do you say? Do we have a deal?"

Aziraphale hesitated to stretch out his own hand. He wasn't sure if this was some kind of trick that Crowley was pulling. But something about the other being's eyes and his forward gesture was earnest. That was something he didn't understand about Crowley. He was a demon at the end of the day, but one that showed he had some good in him.

"I suppose an arrangement can be made between us," said the angel. Aziraphale took Crowley's hand, probably against his better judgment. They shook on it.

"An arrangement? Huh, that's a nice name for it." Crowley said cheerfully. "That's what our pact will be: The Arrangement. I'll make some trouble and-"

"I'll set things right," said Aziraphale. "But when it's all said and done, we're both standing at the end of the day."

"Exactly," said Crowley.

"I still don't know if it will really work." Aziraphale told him honestly. "But I'll give it a try. Perhaps only for now."

"I'll make it worth your while." Crowley said with a sly wink. "Trust me."

~ To Be Continued