Author's Note:

Hi guys! Honestly it's been years since I've written a fanfiction and I bet it shows in my writing. It's my first however to write a fanfic for FairyTail because back then I wanted to only focus writing fanfictions just under one anime/manga. Now I've broken my rule after years of hiatus because this story possessed me. I had seriously woken up the other day with the whole story in my mind and turned on my laptop to write it down.

Some fair warnings. It's my first FairyTail fanfiction so I am very afraid that everybody is out of character. So I apologize in advance. Seconds I got confused with the whole Juvia speaking in third person. So if it seems off I'm sorry. But there were one or two sentences where I allowed her to speak in the first person. Of course I apologize for grammar corrections and spelling.

Spoiler Warning: If you did NOT read up to chapter 397 then I am telling you not to read this. Because you may not get the story and you will be spoiled.

So Thank You once again for reading this story. I hope you enjoy it and please do review!

Disclaimer: I do NOT own FairyTail.

Juvia guessed it was too much. It had hurt already when she was poisoned fighting that demon. Definitely didn't help to be poisoned right after in that murky demon liquid. She was surprised she even lasted till the end of the whole battle. Glad she did because she would have never believed it if anyone told her what happened.

But as the battle finally ended and her adrenaline was zapped, she guessed everything started crashing down on her. And she finally caved in.

One thing Juvia was sure about was that she would never want to go through that experience again. Slipping in and out of consciousness like a wave crashing into a shore. It would be brief and it would be painful only to have her being pulled back into the ocean of sweet darkness. And in the end it would leave her with vague and confusing memories.

She remembered the first one. She probably just passed out recently. All she heard was muffled screamed versions of her name.

Most of the others were flashes of things her eyes would catch in the milliseconds that it would open. From seeing the guild edging closer, to seeing a butterfly fly in the window, a cold compress on her forehead, faceless people standing over her and people panicking as she heard someone coughing violently. It took her some time to realize that the one coughing was her.

Her small moments of consciousness improved. Well enough to have a grasp of what was going on. One of the better ones was when she felt warmth growing in her chest. It made it easier to breath and took the pain away if only just a little bit. Somehow being able to look at the situation she made out Chelia and Wendy, hands glowing with their healing magic.

Having to call Lamia Scale here, Juvia realized it must have been serious. Only being able to see Wendy and Chelia something else registered in her head. Someone was holding her hand. Tight almost frantic and Juvia couldn't help but feel a tinge of cold seeping down from it like a snowflake fluttering on her unresponsive hand. As Juvia registered Chelia being here once again she smiled a bit, Lyon-san. Of course he would have come rushing along with Chelia when he heard she was sick.

That's when she lost consciousness once again. Her next bits of consciousness would be times when it was the middle of the night feeling a weight on her arm. Or that one time she caught Mirajane sleeping on the sofa. Ah so she's been the one taking care of Juvia. It seemed like it was getting better till she had that blackout.

Usually when Juvia slipped into unconsciousness it would be like sleeping. Closing her eyes only to wake up to the next wave of consciousness. But the blackout was different. She was awake. Fully aware. But the problem was she couldn't feel herself able to move. She couldn't make herself open her eyes. In an unresponsive body she was left to her thoughts. And that's where the problem lies. Because though Juvia has been ignoring and avoiding it for so long. She could no longer run from the nightmares and thoughts that have been nagging her.

Gray-sama. Juvia could feel the cold spreading throughout her. She really tried not to mind it. She just tried to brush it off but now with no person to battle as an excuse. No new pair of shoes to buy. No mission to go off to. Juvia was left with the haunting thoughts she had about Gray. Gray-sama's father…because of Juvia… Juvia felt like she was thrown into turmoil. She knew what would happen when she defeated Keith. She knew that she was the one who would make Gray suffer. And Juvia was sure he did.

Juvia internally wept. She, the one who claimed to love her Gray-sama so much had brought so much suffering to him. It bothered her and she realized that incident with Gray wasn't the first time she brought suffering to him. She didn't know why. But she's been having a recurring nightmare about it. She would brush it off but it always came back to haunt her. That scene where the beam shot right through his head.

Juvia tried to busy herself. She went on as much missions as she could. Started sewing and expanded her collection of Gray-sama items in her room. Counting days even hours since important events in her life. Smiled through the day though she had sleepless nights. Drank cups of coffee to stay awake. But the memory was engraved into her head. And when Meredy secretly confided in her, her sorrow of Ultear's disappearance Juvia had a gut feeling that it had something to do with her. That's when it hit her, the scary realization. Gray-sama died because of Juvia.

She had been so stupid. Not paying attention and Gray was the one who had to pay for her stupid mistake. He had taken that beam for her. And though somehow Ultear had changed the course of time she knew that it would have been her fault. Gray would not be breathing, wouldn't be alive all because of her stupidity.

Juvia guessed she was really stupid. She was stupid in that Grand Magic Games when out of her lack of attention was easily pushed out of the water orb. And poor Lucy had to take the brunt of it. It was due to her obvious feeling for Gray Meredy tied that sensory link on them. Never mind if she was the one to suffer but she would have dragged Gray down with her.

Then Juvia finally entertained that thought. Juvia loved Gray very much. She loved him and she tried to ignore every annoyed look, every disgusted glance and every cold shoulder she got. It was fine because even if Gray didn't love her, Juvia was determined to make him love her back. But now…

Thinking back to all the pain that she had given him, the annoyances, the suffering. Juvia had even taken away his Father… and at one point his life. And Juvia had finally reached the conclusion that she tried so hard to ignore:

Juvia doesn't deserve to be with Gray-sama.

And as if that conclusion was the secret password her eyes shot open. Though Juvia regained the feeling of her body she couldn't find the strength to move. Finally realizing that she couldn't be with the man she loves if she's the one bringing him so much pain, Juvia felt like an empty shell. Despite what she wanted. Despite her broken heart. Juvia had to let go of Gray. She had no right to love him any longer.

"Juvia!" Juvia registered that sweet voice. Her eyes then slowly turned to look at the beaming smile of Mirajane, tired and relieved. "You're all right everyone was so worri—" and that's when the tears came out.

Juvia couldn't help but sob out and cover her face in sorrow. Mirajane in panic, worried about her health "Juvia! Are you okay?! Does anything hurt?!"

Juvia merely shook her head in reply and said "No, just Juvia's heart."

It took about two days in bed till Juvia could stand up again and walk again. Though Mirajane wanted for her to stay in the bed longer since she was out for two weeks. Juvia then expressed that she needed some fresh air and some sun. After all two weeks in bed was already too long. Many people were glad to see her out and about. Master was happy because now with Juvia out and about everyone in the guild was accounted for. Juvia was happy knowing that meant Laxus and the others were ok as well. In fact she heard that Laxus' team was able to go on a short mission. All of them, Cana, Levy, Elfman and the rest all congratulated her on her recovery.

It was only Gajeel who knew something was up. Juvia could see it in his questioning glare. She looked away and her mind was thinking of excuses to say to him as he went closer. Luckily however Gajeel was side tracked by Levy as she pulled him away. "Come on Gajeel! We have a mission to do! The train is going to leave soon."

Juvia thanked the heavens for Levy. She also thanked the heavens that another team decided to take a mission too.

"Oh Juvia" Mirajane said with a sweet voice. "Don't be sad. Gray and the others took a week long mission just a day before you woke up. They'll be back soon." She said as she tried to cheer up the gloomy water mage. If only Mirajane knew that she wasn't happy for their fast return but for their present absence.

"So Gray-sama is coming back in two days' time." Juvia thought as she stirred the straw in her drink. "Two days. Would two days be enough to let go of Gray-sama?" Juvia shook herself out of those thoughts. Well if she couldn't do it in two days she would have to start somewhere.

"But where to start" Juvia's mind then suddenly went to her room. Full of Gray-sama novelties. From her towel to her pillow to all those plushies. She could try throwing them out.

"Juvia are you ok? Don't go bumping your head on the table. You just got better" Cana commented as she saw Juvia go through the aforementioned action. Juvia just peeked up at Cana and muttered an apology successfully bringing Cana back to her drinking. Juvia guessed that was too much of a hurdle.

"Now what" she whined as she tried to think of ways to erase Gray from her mind.

"Juvia-san!" Juvia jolted up as she turned to see Wendy and Chelia smiling at her. "Glad you're ok!"

"Wendy!? Juvia thought Gray-sama and the rest went on a mission?! Are you already done?!" Juvia's heart was pounding. She wasn't ready to see Gray yet.

Chelia and Wendy both laughed. "It's ok Juvia. I'm sure Gray will be back soon." Chelia answered with a smile. "I decided to extend my stay to hang out with Wendy. So she didn't end up going along with the mission." Juvia felt her heart relax. At least she wouldn't be seeing Gray that soon.

Looking at the two Juvia smiled, bent down and pulled them into a hug. "Eh? Juvia-san?" Wendy said as she was pulled into the sudden show of affection.

"Don't think that Juvia doesn't remember. It was you two who healed Juvia. If not for the both of you Juvia might not have recovered." Juvia said as she gazed fondly at the two. Both ending up with flushed faces due to embarrassment the two stammered out that it was nothing.

Speaking of thanks. "Chelia?" Juvia turned to look at the god-slayer. "I'm assuming Lyon-san should be back at the guild"

Chelia quirked her head. "Well I think he should be back by now." She then curiously looked at Juvia. "Why do you ask?"

Juvia then smiled as she straightened up to get her things. "Juvia is going to thank him personally!"

As Chelia and Wendy watched Juvia walk out the door Chelia then muttered "Thanks for what?"

Juvia had to make a dash for it when she entered her room. She couldn't be bothered stuck looking at the face of the man she could no longer love. She quickly grabbed her wallet a sack that she had always prepared with a few days clothes and dashed right back out.

Walking from the dorms heading to the train station Juvia thought about what she was about to do. Juvia remembers in that nightmare that Lyon-san was there. If he didn't remember it then there was a chance that it was all in her head. And if it was it was thing she could cross off from her list of offenses against Gray. Though she had a lot more, at least this one. If this one turned out to be false then she could sleep a bit better at night.

Passing by the guild on the way to the station, Juvia looked at the place she called home. After the battle against Tartarus, her guild was subjected once again to another rebuilding. Though it was still being rebuilt she could hear the laughs and the cheers coming from the flimsy building. Always sounding like a celebration. "Maybe Laxus and the rest returned." Juvia felt herself smile just a bit. She had stalked Gray once when they were rebuilding the guild before. Juvia then sighed. "Now Juvia will have more time to herself"

Juvia then turned and walked off to the train station. Unfortunately however the hourly train she picked was 15 minutes late. Luckily Lamia Scale wasn't that far so it would hardly affect her schedule. Not like Juvia had much planned in the first place.

When Juvia arrived, she found herself wandering. As if in a trance she slowly walked around unaware of what was happening around her. Juvia smiled bitterly "Juvia guesses this is what happens when you lose something like the purpose of your life." Though she may be exaggerating, Juvia somehow felt she was losing her purpose. From the moment she woke up to the moment she fell asleep all she ever cared about was Gray. And even Juvia can't take the feeling of an unrequited love knowing that by her own choice she will never end up by his side. Her only choice to save both her and Gray from suffering was to let go off the feelings she harboured for him.

Lost in her thoughts Juvia didn't even realize that she was in front of Lamia Scale. Unsure whether she should just enter she peeked in to see what was going on. Scanning for a familiar face she jolted when she heard her name being called. And there he was the man Juvia was looking for.

"Juvia!? What are you doing here?! I heard that you just got better!" Lyon started as he looked at his surprise visitor.

"Hello Lyon-san." she said as she pulled on a smile. Lyon glanced at her and smiled. "Alas! Is today finally the day where my lovely Juvia-chan has chosen to stay by my side. Oh what a wonderf-" and that's when Lyon had a good look at Juvia's downcast face.

Dropping all teasing antics aside Lyon gave a small endearing smile. "Hey Juvia?!" successfully getting her attention. "Want to grab a bite?"

As Juvia and Lyon were served their drinks, Lyon let a few moments of silence pass. Luckily it seemed they were the only ones sitting outside the restaurant. Taking a sip from his drink and putting it down he finally spoke up. "So what's wrong?"

Juvia was snapped out of her thoughts. Unsure how to start. Biting her lip she faked a smile. "What do you mean?" she cursed herself as it came out shaky. "Nothing's wrong." Lyon's hand however quickly reached for her face.

"Then why is Juvia-chan shedding a tear." Lyon inquired of her. Juvia couldn't help the other tears from coming out.

"Lyon-san…" she grabbed his hand. Looking at him straight in the eye. "Tell me the truth Lyon-san. Do you remember? Do you remember Gray-sama dying?" she broke out.

Lyon's eyes widened in response and were suddenly face downwards. "Don't tell me. That you've been having that nightmare as well." Juvia clutched tighter as her heart plummeted.

Lyon looked sadly at Juvia. "I had a feeling it wasn't just a nightmare. That image…where those beams…" Juvia immediately dropped his hand and covered her face in anguish. It was true. It was all true. Gray…Gray had died.

Juvia felt Lyon's hand on her head. "Juvia, Gray didn't die. I'm not sure how but we both know it didn't actually happen." Juvia violently shook her head.

"It doesn't matter!" she sobbed. "Juvia killed him!" She looked up at him with a tear-covered face. "Juvia killed Gray-sama!"

Lyon in panick grabbed her shoulders and shook her to her senses. "Juvia calm down!" Juvia looked up at him. "It wasn't your fault. Gray wouldn't hate you for it. It didn't even happen." Lyon explained softly to her.

Juvia looked at Lyon with sad eyes. She shook her head once more. "It's all my fault! If I had been paying attention! All I do is hurt him!" Juvia cried. Juvia then clutched her hands together. Looking up at Lyon she expressed. "Lyon-san…Juvia killed his father."

It took some time for Lyon to register what Juvia said. Lyon looked at her in confusion and shook his head. "Juvia, Deliora killed Gray's family years ago."

"No, Juvia killed him. Juvia killed him all over again." she said while shaking. "A necromancer was keeping him alive. He was the one behind face…and…and…" her face twisted into a pained expression. "Juvia had to do it Lyon-san. Gray-sama's father even told her to do it. But still! By killing that necromancer, Juvia had separated Gray-sama from his father. Juvia had taken Gray-sama's father from him!"

Lyon gazed sadly at the water-mage. Seeing her breaking into tears. Succumbing to the pain that she kept in her heart. Lyon knew it would take time for her to heal so all he could do was pull her to a hug and comfort her. "Shhh…Juvia it wasn't your fault."

Juvia continued crying. "Lyon-san…Juvia doesn't deserve to be with Gray." She said it. She finally said it out loud.

Juvia pulled away and looked up sadly. "All that Juvia has been doing is bringing pain to him. Juvia has been nothing but a nuisance…"

"Juvia! That's not true!" Lyon tried to but in.

"But it is!" Juvia said before Lyon could say anything else. "Juvia has endangered his life when she clearly showed her emotions to Meredy, letting her take advantage of it. Juvia has taken away his father. And by Juvia's own stupidity, by Juvia's own inattentiveness Gray-sama had lost his life."

Juvia looked up at Lyon. "Juvia no longer deserves to be at his side. And maybe Juvia never did."

Lyon just looked at Juvia wistfully and sighed. He held her hand. "I don't think that's true. Though you may not believe this, I believe Gray needs you. You of all people who truly loves him, Gray needs someone like you by his side."

Juvia shook her head. "Juvia once thought that it was her place. But it is not hers any longer." Lyon just looked at her sadly. "I think it still is Juvia. It still is."

Juvia just kept quiet and took a few breaths. She needed to pull herself together. Feeling a bit lighter for expressing her feelings and crying it out, Juvia put on a light smile. She then looked at the hand holding hers and squeezed it. "By the way Lyon-san. Juvia forgot to thank you."

Lyon looked at her with a smile. "Thank you for what?"

She smiled at him. "Juvia doesn't remember much but she remembered you holding her hand when Chelia was healing her."

Lyon quirked his head. "What do you mean?"

Juvia gave him a smile. "Juvia remembers while Chelia was healing her you were holding Juvia's hand. Juvia could tell it was you because it was gripping her so tightly and Juvia even felt your ice magic cooling her hand. So ice power and Chelia, Juvia put two and two together and she realized it was you."

Juvia squeezed his hand again. "It was nice of you to come to visit Juvia. Thanks." She looked back at his face just to see it serious and blank.

Lyon then sighed and looked at Juvia once again. "Juvia…I never visited you while you were sick."

Juvia felt her blood curdle. Not wanting to accept the repercussions of this statement she asked. "What do you mean?"

Lyon explained to her. "Juvia, I went on a mission after the Tartarus incident before I knew how dire your state of well-being was. It was an S-class mission that took me more than a week. I only got back 3 days ago."

Juvia clutched Lyon's hand tighter. "But then Lyon. If it wasn't you then it was…"

"It was me."

Juvia felt her heart stop. How she always loved to hear that voice. How she could recognize it even in a sandstorm. Juvia turned just to see the man that she loves, standing before her. And from the way he was glaring at her, she could tell he was pissed.

"Gray-sama?" Juvia asked shaking and still clutching unto Lyon's hand. "Since when…I thought…"

Gray shoved his hands in his pockets and looked at her. "We finished the mission early." answering the question she couldn't finish.

Juvia couldn't help but shiver. She was about to say that it was good that it was a success till Gray interrupted. "So it was quite surprising to find out the person who has been unconscious for two weeks wasn't there when I arrived."

Juvia just pursed her lips at what he said. "Oh well. Um…here I am."

Gray looked at her and pointedly looked at the hand she was holding. "Yes, here you are. Holding Lyon's hand. When funny enough I was the one holding yours. For almost two weeks."

Juvia felt like she lost her voice. Juvia couldn't help but remember those moments of consciousness where she felt a weight on her arm. Lyon then spoke up for her when she realized that she couldn't.

"Nice to see you Gray!" the elder student said as he looked at Gray. Gray's eyes flickered to Lyon for a moment then back to Juvia. "So how long have you been here?"

Gray not leaving his eyes from Juvia explained to them. "I got back from the guild today. I went straight to the infirmary to find out Juvia wasn't there." Juvia received another pointed look from him. "Found out from Wendy and Cheria that you came straight to Lamia Scale. Got on the next train and tried to find you. Luckily your guildmates told me where you were heading and I caught you just about when you got your drinks."

Juvia felt like she was going to faint. Gray was here ever since they got their drinks…then that would mean.

"Ah! So I'm assuming you heard everything then!?" Lyon said as chipper as always looking at Gray who was blankly looking back at him. "Well, that makes things much easier for me." Smiling, Lyon proceeded to stand up.

In panic Juvia clutched his hand tighter. "Lyon-san? What are you doing?" as she gazed at him. Lyon chuckled and gave her a smile. "Well I'm going to pay the bill. And I think you have to talk to him." Proceeding to nudge his head to Gray's direction.

Juvia shook her head. There was no way she could face Gray right now. "Lyon-san! Don't leave me!"

Lyon chuckled once again and laid a kiss on the hand holding his. "Good Luck," He then pulled his hand from her grasp and proceeded to leave. Her hand still awkwardly outstretched, she took a breath and turned to look at the remaining ice mage who was clearly not happy.

Grabbing the awkwardly outstretched hand Gray looked at her darkly "We need to talk."

Juvia couldn't say anything and she decided not to. Gray seemed angry and she could tell because for the past 5 minutes of being dragged by him to God knows where Gray had not said a single word. You could practically see him steaming and Juvia was glad she was made of water because the hands in her bones would be broken by now.

Lost in her thoughts, she yelped as she was suddenly yanked downwards to sit on the ground. Finally reaching their destination Juvia found herself facing a river with no one else in sight. Gray was sitting on the ground beside her with an arm propped upon his knee. Funny enough apparently sometime during the 5 minutes he dragged her, Gray had successfully discarded his shirt without anyone knowing.

Juvia didn't know where to start. Should she thank him for taking care of her for the past two weeks? Should she apologize for the things he overheard?

"He was dead already." Juvia jolted up as she looked at him. His gaze that was previously on the scenery was turned to her. Juvia wanted to say something but he interrupted before she got a chance. "My father died a long time ago. I never expected that I would see him again. Just seeing him for a little bit was good enough for me. It was no use being attached to him. His time was up a long time ago." He said as he turned back to the scenery.

Juvia's eyes watered. "Gray-sama, Juvia…"

"Don't you dare think it was you fault!" His voice booming. The force of his glare focused all on her. "You had to stop that necromancer. There was nothing you could do. Besides…you finally gave my father, the chance to finally rest in peace."

Juvia couldn't look at Gray. Despite what he said she could tell that what happened was still hurting him. Shocking Juvia however Gray suddenly grabbed her hand and placed it on his chest. Even through the tears, Juvia couldn't help but blush at the physical contact as Gray pressed her hand harder to his chest. Her face turning red as she felt its warmth and the drum of his heartbeat.

"Do you feel that Juvia?" Juvia glanced up registering how close she was to his face. "You feel that heartbeat don't you?" and Juvia couldn't deny the thundering beat pounding at his chest.

Gripping Juvia's hand tighter Gray spoke softly. "My father was already dead but I assure you I'm very alive."

Tears started cascading down Juvia's cheeks. "Juvia. It's not your fault." Juvia shook her head, denying what he was saying. "You've done nothing wrong. You couldn't possibly have killed me if I'm not dead."

"But—"

"Juvia." Interrupting her once again. Gray nudged her face so that she would look at him. "It was another time line. It was another possibility. Ultear saved me. It doesn't matter whether I died in another future or not. What matters is that I'm alive in this present. In front of you, I'm alive right now."

"But if not for Juvia! Gray-sama wouldn't have taken that beam!" Juvia cried as she looked at him, sorrow in her eyes.

Gray stared at her and brushed the tears off her cheeks with a thumb. "Do you have any right to say anything? All I cared about was protecting you. You of all people understand that very well."

Juvia didn't understand what he was talking about. Gray however looked at her and caressed her cheek. "Cana mentioned to me once about the time you took out the lacrima, injuring yourself to prove that you were a rightful member of the guild. I remembered Meredy telling me how you purposely broke your own leg when you fought her. You saved me from her and I don't think I've given you my thanks. You even ended up being poisoned after fighting Keith because you were thinking about my father." Gray sighed as he looked at her. "You always think about everyone else above yourself. Isn't it about time that someone thought about you?"

Juvia was crying harder. She didn't want this. She didn't want Gray to just forgive her offenses. Why does he insist that everything she's done has done no harm?

Gray tsked to see more tears falling down her face. "Just so you know. I don't regret it. That I was able to save you. I don't regret it at all. I would have done it a thousand times over again."

Juvia couldn't bear the thought. Seeing that event happen to Gray another thousand times. Juvia wouldn't be able to stand it. "Stop it Gray-sama." She cried out. "Juvia has hurt you so many times. Stop brushing it off like it was nothing. Gray-sama doesn't need such a stupid and terrible girl like Juvia!"

Hearing that sentence however ticked Gray off and he proceeded to tug her face to look at him. "You're not stupid or terrible! You may be over energetic and your reactions can be a bit too much but you're not stupid and you're not terrible! What I know is that you're a girl with a big heart. Someone who's cheerful, selfless and persistent" Gray grinned at her. Putting a lock of her behind her ear he closed his eyes and leaned their foreheads together. "You're someone who I fell in love with"

Juvia's eyes widened and she quickly pushed him away. Going through emotional turmoil of happiness and despair her logic had finally won. "Juvia doesn't deserve to be with Gray-sama." she stated.

Hearing those words Gray narrowed his eyes at the blue-haired girl. "And why is that? Didn't I tell you those things that you were worrying about don't matter?!"

"Yes, Gray-sama did."

"Then what do you mean by that?" he attempted to hold her hand only to have it shoved away.

Juvia looked at him with resolution. "Though you may find it in your heart to forgive Juvia for all the things that she's done for you, Juvia cannot forgive herself so easily. Juvia has given you so much suffering. Juvia has no right to be the one that Gray-sama loves!"

Seething with anger Gray successfully captured her wrist and pulled her closer. Through gritted teeth he muttered "What the hell are you saying?! You have every right to!" Making sure to hold all of her attention "Are you just going to toss away whatever feelings you have for me?!"

Juvia feeling her resolve shaking took a deep breath. "Juvia will."

Gray looked at her unblinking and all. "You can't"

"Yes she can!"

"Then tell me Juvia" as Gray looked at her, clutching tightly to her wrist. Gray's hand was shaking from anger. "Tell me you don't love me anymore."

As Gray spat out those words, Juvia felt her heart throb. And there it was, something that Juvia couldn't dare to do. Though she had resolved herself to do so, she couldn't tell him. Juvia's face scrunched up in sadness as she let tears escape her eyes. Juvia looked up at Gray's expectant face, his eyes gazing at her with great intensity. "That's the thing Gray-sama." She said in a broken voice as she closed her eyes, not wanting to see the gaze that was being focused upon her. "Juvia still hasn't figured it out. She still doesn't know how to stop loving you."

Juvia didn't know what happened as she kept her eyes closed but she felt a warmth envelope her lips. Opening it to realize it was Gray's covering her own. She pulled away. Her betraying heart beating franticly. After all she had been dreaming and praying for the moment when Gray would finally kiss her.

"Wha—" she started. Only to have Gray steal another one. By now Juvia was feeling dizzy and she felt every single nerve in her body tingle in delight. Juvia quickly pulled apart once again and leaned away, trying to avoid it.

Gray however quickly laid upon her lips a third kiss and in an attempt to get away she ended up crashing down, prostrate on the soft ground. To her dismay Gray proceeded to tower over her, successfully caging her. Now she had nowhere to escape.

Juvia then quickly covered her mouth to try to shield it from any more of Gray's barrage of kisses. She looks up at him, powerless as he looms over her with a determined look on his face that set her face on fire and her heart on a marathon. Looking away from his face, not removing her hands from her mouth she mumbled out. "You're too cruel."

In anger Gray pulled her hands away from her mouth. Successfully removing the make-shift barrier and had her looking back at him in panic. Gritting his teeth Gray replied "And why exactly am I cruel?"

Juvia pressed her lips together as some tears flowed out of her eyes. "Because if you do something like that to Juvia. It would be harder for her to stop loving you."

Gray looked at her for a few seconds, his face looking at her curiously till he broke out into a small chuckle. He looked at Juvia and gave a small smile. "That's because Juvia. I don't want you to stop loving me."

Juvia looked up at him tears clouding up her vision. "Why?"

Gray looked at her fondly. "Because I was saved by you." At those words Juvia's mind went hazy and all forms of protest disappeared from her mind.

Gray paused for a while and smiled wistfully at her. "If you're full of regrets for causing the suffering of others. Of regrets from bad choices. The guilt from causing the death of someone else." He said and Juvia could see the pain showing in his eyes. "I of all people understand it very well."

Gray closed his eyes and took a breath. He lessened the grip he had on Juvia's wrists. "If I had been stronger then maybe they wouldn't have died. If I hadn't gone searching for Deliora, she wouldn't have sacrificed her life. Even Ultear, gave me another chance to live at the cost of hers." Gray opened his eyes and he looked at Juvia once again giving her a small smile. The smallest of smiles that could be mustered through all of the pain.

"I know all about it Juvia. And if there's anyone who doesn't have the right it's me. I was someone who was broken, unable to love." Gray sighed. "There were people I loved greatly that were taken away from me. I've become afraid to love. I couldn't take the idea of involving myself with someone, being tied down to them just to have them slip away from my grasp all over again. And I thought I could do it. I thought I could be alone." Then he allowed himself a small chuckle.

He brought his hand to her cheek and caressed it once more. "Then you found a way to my heart. And you saved me by doing so Juvia. When I fought against my father I had tried to use my iced shell. But when I was about to make that fatal mistake I realized there were others waiting for me." His thumb started tracing Juvia's lips. "I saw flashes of them. People important to me. People I have already tied my heart to. I saw you."

Gray lowered his head. Once again touching his forehead to hers closing his eyes. "I saw you smiling at me. Calling my name. And I regretted it. Because I realized it too late. I realized that no matter how hard I tried. I couldn't help but fall in love with you. And I couldn't stand it anymore. I could no longer avoid it. Because no matter how I feared losing another person that I loved…" Gray opened them sweetly looking at her "I couldn't stand even more the idea of you disappearing without me telling you how much I love you."

"So there I was Juvia. Sitting by your bedside every day. Till Erza threatened me to go on a mission because she was worried for my health." Gray smiled at her. "I was so ready to finally tell you that I love you."

Juvia broke into a smile and released a small sob. With her free hand she covered her mouth trying to quell more from escaping. "Is it really ok for Juvia to love you?"

Gray gently took her hand from her mouth. Brought both of her hands to wrap around his neck. "You say that you don't deserve to be by my side but you're the only one I can even imagine to be with. I lived all this time thinking I could be alone. But I realized that I couldn't. You saved me from myself Juvia. You gave me a reason to keep on living. You helped make my life one worth living because for some reason you could love a broken person like me. So please, please don't stop loving me." He pleaded to her in soft tones.

Juvia and Gray looked each other in the eye. And Juvia released another sob. "Juvia couldn't even if she tried." Juvia then broke into a smile. "I love you." She uttered.

And Juvia finally kissed back as they had their fourth first kiss.