Stan stared in shocked silence at his niece and nephew. Dipper was kicking but his struggles were futile as one of the rotten beasts held him up by his arm. The boy's face was face twisted in fear and what looked like slight pain. Stan saw Mabel standing a few feet away, whimpering. Her desperate cry rose over every groan as the zombies drew closer to the twins, and as Dipper was brought closer to the undead being's cruel jaws. Dipper screamed and thrashed but his attempts to get away were useless.

They were about to die. Stan imagined them being eaten alive, torn to shreds as the zombies feasted upon them.

No.

Stan would not let that happen.

The old man picked up the first thing he saw- the tax collector bat, same one he used to ward away annoying tax collectors.

A zombie approached him, snarling, it's mouth hanging by only a few tendrils of skin. It swung it's sharp nails at Stan who brought the bat down with a roar. It's head shattered as it fell limp.

Neither of the twins noticed him as he stood behind Dipper's soon-to-be killer.

The zombie was about the dig his teeth into Dipper's head. Dipper was screaming, his eyes wide with terror.

Stan narrowed his eyes. "Not today, you dead, son of a gun!" he muttered.

Using all his power, he brought the bat down on the side of the zombie's head. The zombie let go of Dipper who crashed to the floor into where his twin quickly wrapped her arms around him. He stomped on the zombie's header, forever stilling it.

The twin's looked up at Stan, both wide eyed. Dipper looked slightly confused and dazed. Definitely in some sort of shock. Mabel also looked as if she was in shock, but not as much as Dipper and more relieved if anything.

Stan struggled for breath. The zombies around them advanced, but there was a fairly clear path where Stan had barged through. Stan pointed towards the stairs. "You two! Attic! NOW!"

Dipper, with Mabel still clutching him as if she was terrified he'd been ripped away from her again, stuttered. "Gr-Gruncle Stan?"

Stan fiercely spun around to face them. "I SAID NOW!"

Dipper and Mabel quickly dashed into the doorway behind them, and through the living room. Stan began wildly swinging the tax collector bat. Brains splattered around him and blood and goo covered his suit. Some landing in his glasses, slightly blinding him.

"Alright, you undead jerks, ready to die twice?" Stan snarled.

The zombies persisted on, though, ignoring his threat and severely outnumbering Stan. He stumbled back, still hitting zombies left and right.

Behind him, Dipper and Mabel sprinted up the stairs and into the attic, Mabel shutting it behind her. Waddles, who Stan only then realized had been with them the whole time, trailed after them.

"THe only wrinkly monster who harrasses my family is me!" Stan growled, hitting another. "Take that! And that!"

He retreated to the stairs. "Eat it, no-lives!"

One growled defiantly and the bat hit it in the mouth. It grabbed it in its teeth and snapped it in half with one bite, only for Stan's fist to hit it, brass knuckles reinforcing the blow.

"Anyone else want a piece?"