Author's Note: I wrote basically this entire thing yesterday, in the space of one hour, about twenty minutes after eating a dessert the local bakery called 'Tower of Brownies'.

That should tell you all you need to know.

Extracurricular Activities

(*)

"And finally, we have Pyrrha Nikos," Emerald said, opening up the last file for the night.

Cinder smirked, continuing to work on her sewing without any visible concern. "Ah yes, the invincible girl."

"She's smart," Mercury said with a shrug. "I wouldn't say invincible."

Cinder smiled, her expression one of a cat seeking prey as the idea of a weakness was presented to her. "Do tell."

"Her semblance is Polarity, but… you'd never know just by watching," Emerald said.

"After she made contact with my boot," Mercury added, "she was able to move them around however she wanted. But she only made slight adjustments."

"Hmmm. Interesting. Yang implied as much during Ultimate Frisbee in the quad," Cinder acknowledged, "but it's glad to confirm it. Add her to the list."

"Sure th—wait, what?" Emerald said, her thumb freezing halfway to the button on her Scroll.

"Ultimate Frisbee. It's a game where you…"

"I know what Ultimate Frisbee is, Cinder!" Emerald said, a small bit of panic entering her voice, as though she had seen an extra foot spontaneously erupt from Cinder's forehead. "Why do you?"

Cinder blinked. "Well, of course I have to pass for a student. I mingled. Stop being ridiculous."

"I think… I think what Emerald was implying is that you're not… I mean you… not so much the Frisbee type, per se…?" Mercury said. Or asked. It wasn't totally clear.

Cinder rolled her eyes. "Children. Please. I have to maintain my cover, just like everyone else. The mysterious student who never leaves her room and never interacts with anyone would be noticed immediately. By putting on a bit of faux-socialization, I blend in far more seamlessly for our work. It means nothing but a momentary inconvenience," she said, putting another stitch into her project.

Emerald nodded, the shock of the moment being dispelled by Cinder's cool logic. "Yeah, okay. That makes sense, it's just… y'know. It was a little weird, since you never…. With us, is all…"

"Because it is all pointless, and you should remember that," Cinder warned. "We are working. You two don't have any time to goof off."

"Right. Right. Can't be goofing…" Emerald began, only to be cut off as she jumped halfway out of her skin by the door slamming open.

"Cin-dawg!" Yang Xiao Long shouted, barreling into the room. "How is mah girl?!"

"Daaaaaaamn girl, you need to knock! I don't want you to see me hanging out with someone less awesome than you!" Cinder squealed, jumping to her feet and engaging Yang in an elaborate series of fist-bumps that lasted roughly forty seconds. "So are we still on for tomorrow?"

Emerald's jaw looked like it would detach from her head and go through the floor.

"You know it, sistah! Biggest street race of the season and you and I got front row seats," Yang said with a grin. "I had to beat down a few guys for the location, and Junior's club is a little burned, but nobody cares about that. What we do care about is hot guys and hotter cars while rubbing elbows with some of the worst crowds in town! Is that a rush, or is that a rush?"

Cinder laughed, and high-fived Yang, and Mercury questioned if he was dreaming all this. Yes, a nightmare seemed very likely. "Xiao Long, you are crazy, but damn if I don't love it. I will be there and I'll be dressed so hot those bad boys won't even notice you're standing next to me."

"That's my gal! See ya when I see ya!" Yang cheered, strolling out of the room like she owned it and slamming the door behind her.

Cinder took a deep breath, and sat down. "Now. For the next phase of the plan, you two will…"

"I… I… I… I… I…" Emerald said.

"The Hell was that?!" Mercury snapped.

"Do not take that tone with me," Cinder said coldly. "I told you, I have been working undercover to build connections among the students. It requires some undignified interactions. I've been working just as hard as you two ha-"

"Like Hell! We've been fighting students and going to insanely tedious classes and generally just watching and cataloguing everything for you, while you have been hanging out at car shows and flirting with random dudes?"

"First of all, it is a car race, not a car show," Cinder said. "And second, you think I derive any enjoyment from the insipid drivelings of pitiful students and small time hoodlums? You think I take any joy from any of this? You simple-minded dolt, I should-" she cut off, then, as her scroll beeped. "Excuse me, I have to take this."

"But-"

She held up a silencing palm, and said, "Hello, Cinder speaking? Weissy! Oh, how are you dear? Finally picked out your dress? Hmmmm? Oh, you got that one! I told you it was the best one for you, it brought out your eyes like nothing else in the store. Except for all those luscious shoes, of course, haha! Of course we'll need to go back after the dance, I saw the most marvelous pendant that I simply have to have, but I couldn't carry one single thing more! And this time we simply must bring little Blake, that ribbon of hers is screaming for a new hairdo," Cinder squealed.

Yes, squealed.

"The fuck?" Emerald said, finally able to get a word out past her lips again.

"No, no, I'm not doing anything important, I can talk," Cinder said with a giggle, reclining on her stomach on the bed and kicking her feet casually in the air. "Sooo, what unlucky sap are you going to completely outshine when you bring them to the dance this weekend? Oh, no. Oh no! Weissy, Neptune Vasilias? Weiss-yyyyy, he is just an absolute cad! Why you know I saw him flirting with that Velvet girl not two days ago? I swear it's true. You know I wouldn't lie to you dear, that BFF necklace we got isn't for show!"

Mercury choked on something. Maybe just air, though it was equally possible he hadn't remembered to breathe and it was just his tongue.

"Oh, Weissy, I never can talk you out of anything. If your heart is set on this Vasilias, you go and you snare him. Perhaps that stunning dress will finally make an honest man out of him," Cinder said. There was silence as she listened to the other side of the conversation for a few moments, before giggling helplessly. "Oh, Weiss-y! 'Not too honest'? Dear, you are an absolute scandal! Well, I know you have a lot of homework to do for that dreary Port's class, so I'll let you go. Hugs and kisses, talk to you later!" Cinder said, clicking the scroll off. "Now. Where were we?"

"BFF necklace?!" Emerald shrieked.

"Hm? Oh, yes, Weiss insisted. I could hardly say no, it would have blown my cover," Cinder said with a shrug. "See? I told you I was working."

"You! Were! Shopping!"

"And it was difficult. You have no idea how many shoes I had to carry," Cinder said evenly. "But it was worth it. Weiss Schnee will be a fantastic contact within the school, and I cultivated her."

"You helped her pick out a prom dress!" Emerald snarled. "Why didn't I get a prom dress, huh? Huh?!"

"Don't be insipid. I do what I do because we must infiltrate every corner of Beacon, every crevice of the academic institution. I am not playing some game, I am putting more work and effort into every second than you two have put into your entire time here! How do you think we have learned so much of the students? It was my masterful infiltration, of which every second has been a dark, labyrinthine plot to-"

A knock came on the door. "Oh, sorry. I think that's for me," Cinder said, getting up from her bed again. She opened the door with a bounce in her step, smiling as Pyrrha entered bearing a tray.

"Hello there, Cinder! I know it's a little late, but Ren just finished making pancakes for Nora's Midnight Breakfastravaganza, and I thought you might want some," Pyrrha said with a smile. Her gaze turned to Emerald and Mercury, and faltered. "Oh! Um, I'm sorry. I didn't think, I don't have enough for your friends…"

"It's fine, dear, they're not really my friends. More like a study group," Cinder said warmly.

"What?!" Emerald squeaked. Mercury just made a few extremely angry sounds that really didn't translate into any words, though one of them was oddly similar to 'groundhog' if you heard it with one ear plugged.

"And you know, even if it is a little rude, I would hardly turn down one of Ren's pancakes!" she continued, taking the tray from Pyrrha eagerly and cutting off a forkful of the steaming pastry. "Mmmmm… oh, they are just heavenly, even without syrup."

"Yes, I apologize for that. Nora…" Pyrrha began.

"Oh, that girl is just a menace. She's lucky she's such a gifted musician or there would be no living with her," Cinder said with a sigh.

Musician…? Mercury mouthed silently, images of a girl smashing his ribs with a giant hammer while she cackled madly filling his mind. Analyzing Nora had not been one of the fun tests.

"And she does make wonderful hot chocolate!" Pyrrha said. "She… drinks it all, but…"

"As I said, a menace," Cinder said firmly, handing the tray and its devoured contents back to Pyrrha. "Still, dear, a lovely gesture. You are a saint. We are still on for the water park next weekend? I think it will be nice to get out and have some fun without all the pressure of this dance and that silly tournament hanging over us."

"Oh, come on!" Emerald screamed, her tone somewhere between rage and absolute sorrow.

"It does sound grand," Pyrrha said, a bit nervously. "Um… would your friends like to…?"

"Actually, we-" Mercury began.

"No, I'm afraid the poor dears despise swimming. And beside, far too much homework on their plates," Cinder said with a chuckle. In a conspiratorial whisper, she said, "Not the brightest students, these two."

"I. That. You. I. That. It. But. Hate. Hate. Hate. Hate…" Mercury murmured, his right eye twitching slightly.

"Have a lovely evening, Pyrrha, dear," Cinder said warmly. "And thank you again!" she closed the door, smiled, and whirled on Mercury and Emerald like a cat turning on a mouse that had just taunted it. "You little imbeciles! What was that?!"

"That was you! Having breakfast for dinner and making plans to hang out at the pool!" Mercury shrieked, his voice going maybe a little higher than was sane. "We have to fight people! And catalogue 1,200 students! And go to classes all day to learn things we already know! And you… you!"

"I… that is… Cinder…" Emerald said. "I think what he's trying to say is… the division of labor here is a bit… … off…?"

"Division of labor? Division of labor?!" Cinder snarled. "I work tirelessly. From sun up, to sun down. To bring my dream to reality. And you complain because I am not doing enough for your delicate sensibilities?! You cannot imagine the sacrifices I have made, the plans, the alliances in the shadows I have had to forge! Roman Torchwick? Ha! There are a thousand more just like him, all over the world, each one of them dancing to my tune. I am like unto a goddess, you simple things of flesh and bone. I have achieved power you cannot begin to imagine, and I shall achieve more, and I worked ceaselessly for every iota of it! You do not question my judgment, and you do not accuse me of giving this plan anything more or less than utmost seriousness or I will-"

She was cut off, then, by a knock on the door.

Very slowly, Mercury said, "Do not. Open. That."

"Please. We're begging you," Emerald said. "If you value our respect, if you have ever respected us in turn. Please."

Cinder pondered this for a second. Then, she got up and opened the door. Emerald sobbed a little.

"Ruby, sweetie!" Cinder said, opening her arms wide to give the smaller girl a hug, and prompting a sound from Emerald that was slightly less melodic than a cat having a hairball. "What are you doing here?"

"Um… it's just… Yang said it was… done, so…" Ruby said, blushing furiously.

Cinder gasped, before giggling slightly. "Oh! Silly me, and here I was working on it all night too. Of course, it's right here." She sauntered over to her bed and picked up the item she had been sewing during the meeting, holding it up and open to reveal a lovely black and red dress, just Ruby's size.

Ruby blushed. "Aw, jeez. I really wish you hadn't done that…"

"Oh, don't be ridiculous, dear. I had all the time in the world, and it's not like I have anyone else lining up for my dresses!" Cinder scoffed. Emerald sqeezed her hands into fists so hard a trickle of blood began to drip out. "I love to sew, and you absolutely will look lovely in it. Take it, wear it proudly, and make all the rest of us at the dance look like plain old maids."

Ruby sighed. "That's easy for you to say. You're all glamorous, like Weiss or Yang! I'm not… really a formalwear girl, you know? I feel more at home in a hood fighting Grimm."

Cinder placed her hands on her hips firmly. "Ruby Rose. You are a beautiful and talented young woman, and you look wonderful no matter what you wear. And you know it, so this constant lack of confidence in your own specialness is vexing."

Ruby giggled. "Now you really sound like Yang. Only… fancier."

"Well, I have been hanging around her a lot," Cinder said.

"No, it's more than that," Ruby said confidently. "I bet you'd have been a great big sister, if you'd had like… someone younger looking up to you."

Cinder laughed heartily. "I know. Too bad there aren't any people like that, right?"

Mercury kind of vibrated, like he really, really wanted to get up and hurt someone, but wasn't sure who. Emerald just kept on making weird hacking noises, as the rage sort of poured out of her without her consent.

"I'll tell you what," Cinder said. "I'm not doing anything right now… how about we grab some ice cream and talk about this a little more? My treat."

Ruby perked up immediately. "Okay, almost worth wearing a dress!"

Cinder laughed, a sound clear and pure like a bell. "Oh, you little scamp. But this is serious, too. I will get you excited about this dance if it is the last thing I do."

"For enough Rocky Road," Ruby said sagely, "You can convince me of almost anything."

As Ruby turned to exit the room, Cinder looked down on Emerald and Mercury as if she was considering something. "Oh, right… the two of you…"

Slowly, hopefully, they looked up at her. A tiny hint of doubt slipped into Mercury's rage-filled gaze. Emerald looked like someone who had just seen the sun for the first time in years, as she stood shakily for the hug she had longed for all her life. She took a halting step forward…

And Cinder said, "I have a report due in Oobeck's class tomorrow, don't forget to write it for me while you look over the database again? And do a better job this time, Nikos was the only decent one you found tonight. Toodles!"

She followed Ruby out the door, slamming it behind her.

The silence was deafening. For several long minutes, it settled over the room, strangling all hope, until Mercury finally said, "You ever think we should form a union or something? Like for… better working conditions? I bet Torchwick would join, and that Neo girl seems nice. Quiet, but…"

"Hssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssarrrrrrrrrrrghble!" Emerald said, falling to her knees and slamming the database list of students into the floor again and again. "I had to buy my own dress!"

"Didn't you... steal the money you used, though?" Mercury asked.

"Not the point! I still had to buy it, and the tiny red maniac gets the personal artwork of Cinder?! Why no dress for Emerald, boss?! Huh? Huh?! Why no dress for Emerald?! HSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSGGGGGAARRRRGHLE"

"…. So we'll discuss the union thing later, then later, then," Mercury said, wisely, as he opened his Scroll to start typing that report.