Hi, my name is Bernardo Vasconcelos Breyner De La Mancha Tianmeng, and I am a 17 year old boy. I'm half german, half spanish and half chinese, my skin is of a luxurious and manly tan while my hair is as black as the darkness of the night, and my eyes of a piercing vermillion tone like the savageness of a beast within the pulsating blood of misery. I am sufficiently muscular like a swimmer - even though I hate water -, and people tell me I'm very sexy and masculine. I usually wear purple and green clothes to express my inner feelings of depression and the savage might of my wild soul, respectively. I have many wolf stickers and pendants because my spirit animal is the wolf, I'm very depressed because nobody understands my pain and suffering, so I turn to nature to feel my shamanistic connection with the higher powers of the world. Chicks and guys dig me because of my mysteriousness and coolness, but I always turn them down because I do not want them to see the horror and pain of my inner self. For this reason I am a virgin, a fact that I take with stride unlike those sluts and AIDS filled jocks. Seriously, if they all died of STDs I would totally not be surprised and I would support it 100%, nature must take back from the capitalist exploitation of the corrupt civilisation.

Anyways, I decided to work at a pizzeria called Freedy Fazbear's Pizza. I really didn't want to, I just want to go away from civilisation and all awful things like the bullies - from which I have to old back my inner savagery and rage in order to not be arrested - and the mean preppy girls, but my parents forced me to do it, or else they would rape my sister. My parents are evil, they're always bossy and mean and always slap and beat me up, I can only trust my sister but I'm afraid she's being brainwashed into being their perfect media slut. So I relented, and went to get a job at the pizzeria. There an evil and ugly fat man with like three chins and blobs of carnicerous fat and pus looked at me. He was very intimidated by my masculinity, so he puffed up, even though that made his inner weakness show.

"So you're the faggot that's going to work here?" he said, barely hiding his sexual insecurities with mean words, "Ah, I doubt someone as gay as you would last a night!"

"I'm not afraid, I know I can do the best job possible if you give me a fair chance!"

"Ah, these animatronics, they will eat you ALIVE! There, you get the job, you'll be paid $120 a week, and you'll probably not even survive, unmanly as you are!"

Then he left, rolling away in his fatness like a burrito of obesity (AN: don't you think fat people are totally the decadence of western society and their opulence is pure degeneracy?). I was very sad and mad, but I did as told. I checked the instructions manual and I waited in the cabin. I felt a lot of negative energy in the air thanks to my spiritual wolf powers and so I knew that the mascots were undead, but my own soul was as consumed by darkness and melancholy too so I didn't get too nervous. Mostly I just waited, eating tofu and sushi (AN: fried food is for fat americans of obesity and cancer) while I watched the cameras.

Everything was in place, so I read a depressing book about the tragic death of Elagabalus - such an eloquent, miserable soul in the likeness of myself; if only he embraced nature instead of the Sun -, and then I decided to meditate. I didn't waste much power, I knew how to defend myself without damaging the robots. I lit up some herbal incenses I bought from and I prayed to my favourite goddess, Hel, the norse goddess of death and misery. I put myself in the lotus position, took a deep breath, and I had an astral projection.

"Good night Bernardo Vasconcelos Breyner De La Mancha Tianmeng" said Hel wisely and motherly like my mother never could, "How are you?"

"I'm fine great goddess, I just feel sad and unfulfilled because my life is utter pain and darkness and I know that commiting suicide will fool Odin to take me to Valhala and not let me spend eternal afterlife with you" I said sadly, pristine tears of molten lead sliding across my (literally) ethereal face.

"I know, but you're going to have to bear just a little more. Tonight you will meet your soul mate, the one that will turn your darkness into life and help you overrun your life's problems."

"Really? That's awesome! Thank you oh great goddess!"

"Don't mention it, my little Bernardo. But for now, you should be awake, because the mascots are coming."

I nodded happily, and so I returned to my body. Hel was right, the mascots were nowhere in sight, and I could hear their footsteps down the hall. I decided to calmly close the doors, but then Chica the horrendous foul stupid fowl appeared. She was very ugly and stupid, she was a bird and not a canine. I used my airbending powers - yes, I have airbending, the mighty spirits of the wolves gave my their control over the element of wind in order to peacefully fight back against my enemies - to great a powerful gust of air that send her flying down the corridor, pushing her back without damaging her at all. Bonnie the filthy rabbit tried to strangle me from behind, but I airbended a layer of moving currents around my masculine body so he couldn't touch me, and I send him flying off too as well. Freddy tried to throw a chair at me, but I used my airbending to both lay the chair gently and to push him away until he was next to Chica.

Now nearly all mascots were very far away from me, so I decided to close the hatch, but then I hear footsteps sprinting towards me. Just as I closed the door, Foxy was inside. Now he was locked alongside me, and I was in a very cramped space so my airbending would be harder. I decided to airbend a layer of air like a shield around me, it'd perhaps be enough to prevent some of his attacks. Then he jumped at me, and grabbed me by the wrists and threw me on the table. His hands were getting scrapped by the fast moving air, and I was afraid I was going to damage his paws for good.

Foxy looked at me. He could not move his face, but his eyes were full of mad passion and hatred, misery as deep as the night sky and the void of space, a darkness as proffound as mine. I felt sorry for him and I began to cry out of my eternal and immense compassion towards him, and in a moment of irrationally I leaned forward and kissed him in the lips.

He ceased to grab me, and I stopped. He looked at me, a pure look of confusion and pain in his beautiful white eyes, before he began to cry and sob uncontrolably.

"Shh, it's okay, I'm not going to hurt you like the others did."

"H-how d-did you know?" Foxy said, a surprisingly deep and sexily voice that wasn't mechanical at all, like that of Bradly Cooper. My chest was full of love and adoration just by listening to him.

"I saw it in your eyes, you went through a lot of pain and misery, just like I did. I don't know what they did to you, but I'm sure it was just as bad as they bullied and tortured me."

Foxy sobbed, and without warning hugged me, sorrounding my body with thoe mechanical arms, as powerful and muscular as mine, as he kept on crying. I hugged him back, kissing him in the cheek.

"The humans, they made me by using evil mormon magic to imprison me in this. I was once a powerful wolf in the wilds, but the poachers killed all my pack and family and captured me and took me to Utah on a horribible and smelly crate and did horrible experiments on me, before killing me and putting my soul in this hateful mechanical body, which they made into a fox just to spite me. Then they made me work at Freedy's with the other wolves that were also put in mechanical bodies, only to torture us and chain us. I tried to control my own nature and I couldn't, so I did the only thing natural to me and I bite off a person's head. Then I was left to rot in the pirate attraction, never to be fixed. This feels so wrong, all I want is to DIE and be free, but I can't!"

"I know the feeling, people also tortured me and I can't commit suicide and die, so I'm left to wallow in my pain and misery. But now we have each other Foxy, I can help you get your revenge and be free."

"I, I want to trust you, my sweet angel, but I just can't after all the lies they told me."

"I know, and that's why I'm going to prove to you that I'm not like the others, that you can trust me, that... you... can... love me..."

We stared at each other's eyes, two souls united by the pain of unforgiveness, and at last he kissed each other, a real kiss this time, our tongues wrestling madly. Foxy tasted surprisingly amazing a sweet flavour of cinammon in his saliva, and I couldn't get enough, deepening my passion as much as I could. After what may have been hours - though it felt only like a fraction of a second to me, like all happiness in my depressing life -, we straed in each other's eyes, and for the first moment in a long time both of us were in Heaven.

"I love you, Foxy."

"I love you too, though I do not know your name."

"My name is Bernardo Vasconcelos Breyner De La Mancha Tianmeng."

"Such a beautiful and noble name, befitting of a pure angel such as yourself" he said, nuzzling against my neck.

Then the alarm beeped and it as 6 am. Before Foxy could leave back to his attraction, I grabbed his hand, not letting him go.

"I told you I was going to set you free, my love, and that's exactly what I'm going to do."

So we walked out of the pizzeria, holding each other's hands, showing the world our eternal love and vows to each other. As we walked out, the ugly evil fat man was staring.

"So you did survive. By being an utter FAGGOT! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Now give me back my mascot, you won't be paid for being such a dog-fucking degenerate."

Foxy growled, but I stepped forward, confident and manly as the entire town gathered in to see, shocked by Foxy being alive and for my defiance against their tyranny and corruption.

"Foxy is not a dog, he is a wolf, a wolf you deprived from the wilds in your evil capitalist lust for power and exploitation of nature! As for me being 'a dog-fucking degenerate', why, I am very much in love with this beautiful soul, who is far more human than any of you will ever be!"

Everyone then got very MAD - except for my sister, who was very supportive and high fiving -, so they got out guns, ready to shoot us down. But I used my powerful airbending to use gusts of wind to disarm them and throw the guns away, and then I took the air from their lungs and suffocated them all to death. They all died as they lived, groveling pigs of decay, their flesh in the likeness of faeces as their eyes exploded due to the lack of pressure. Then I turned to my love, and kissed him passionately as the Sun rose - though I hate the Sun, so I airbended a huge storm cloud to block it.

"We are finally free."

And so I, Foxy, Freddy, Chica (even though I hate her), Bonnie and my sister all walked together, to find a new home and a new horizon, and start a life of pure happiness and joy.