Uh… hello. I have returned. My apologies for taking so long on this chapter, especially after the cliffhanger last time. The fact of the matter is that I lost my drafts to Despairingly Perfect and was completely unmotivated to continue writing it, especially since I haven't really liked this fic in a looooooong time because it is written in a crap style.

Rest assured, I was never planning on abandoning this fic. That just wasn't an option for me. However, I was completely unmotivated to continue writing the danganronpa 1 cast, especially after I lost everything of Despairingly Perfect. Quite honestly, I would love more than anything to just write the V3 cast doing stuff, but I promised you guys a series, so I'm here to deliver in full. And I won't be lazy about it, either. I have a few other fics coming out soon anyways, so I can get my V3 love out there haha.

Anyways, so as to not overstress myself, I will no longer be constraining myself with the weekly Thursday updates. I hardly stick to it anyways, and quite honestly a majority of the time I'm overstressing about just attempting to reach that deadline, when the fact of the matter is that I just love writing and danganronpa, so I shouldn't stress myself out about either, otherwise I'll just pump out crap. Plus, I'm very busy in real life as well. I'm an avid volunteer, I'm currently composing a musical, I'm actually in a musical, I'm writing a book that needs to be finished by April, and I just found out yesterday that I got a position that I applied for. And that's not to even touch on my academic life. Now, I know that none of you probably care that much about my personal life, and I really don't expect you to. However, I am telling you all this just to show you how little fanfiction writing I can get done on an average day.

But don't forget: I will still give you consistent updates! Honestly, now that I'm telling myself not to overstress, my updates will probably be more consistent because I'm not unmotivated.

Sorry for the long A/N, but it was necessary. Now without further ado, enjoy the chapter!

I wasn't too sure what Naegi expected to happen after the chaos of the previous day. Despite the sadistic master plan carried out by Maizono a few days prior, he was under the impression that now the lot of us would begin to trust each other more.

That couldn't be further from the truth.

"We just have to wait… a bit longer…" murmured Naegi, face resting carelessly on the palm of his left hand as he gazed intently at the ajar cafeteria door. Although his gaze implied his absolute focus on the situation, the bags under his eyes betrayed his true mindset. His eyes nearly closed every few seconds, only to snap right back open as if he had suddenly been dosed in cold water.

"Naegi-kun…"

Mukuro stalked forward, plopping down next to Naegi in the chair just beside him. She scooted her chair very slightly to the right, angling herself just right as to face Naegi. The action was virtually unremarkable in itself, but nothing Mukuro did was without purpose; every word she said, every action she took she carefully thought over. It might've been a stretch, but I had the suspicion she overthought just as much as myself. Or perhaps it was the opposite, perhaps Mukuro was simply quick-witted and analytical, just like Junko. "Are you sure? It's well over an hour past our meeting time."

"I told everyone that we were going to be meeting for breakfast today and we were gonna go check out the fifth floor afterwards. This is important, they would have no reason to go against it!"

"And yet here we are." Mukuro spared no degree of sass, drumming her fingers rhythmically on the table. "We should just go. It's their loss."

For a few moments, Naegi was completely silent. He glanced at Mukuro, then back to the door, then back once more. "What if somebody comes, huh? What if-"

"If they were going to, they would've done so by now." Mukuro shrugged, peering at her nails. For the second time today, Mukuro reminded me strikingly of Junko. I suppose twins do have similar habits. "Like I said, their loss."

"It's not that simple!"

"Look." Mukuro turned to fully face Naegi, staring deeply into his unwavering gaze. Her nails forgotten, she only had eyes for the optimistic boy. "So far, only Ishimaru and I have decided to drop by. If you want to keep us, let's get moving before we get bored of this. Sound good?" Without giving Naegi a single moment to comprehend her words, she sprang out of her chair and marched out of the cafeteria, the only sound left in the near-empty room being the ghost of her footfall.

I was dumbfounded. Mukuro wasn't like that. Mukuro was a soldier first and foremost. She never had a word to say against anything. She was tough and brassy, but only when need be. Right now, she just seemed… snappy? Is that the right word?

Perhaps this was a delayed side effect of Junko's passing. Junko had always kept Mukuro restrained, contained within an imaginary cage that only she held the key for. She had always been passive and submissive, only obeying the words of her younger sister. Whether it be brainwashing others or willingly brainwashing herself, Mukuro would always submit… she hadn't known what a world without Junko looked like.

Now she knew all too well what that world held for her… maybe that's why…

The sounds of clacking crutches and the frantic callings of Mukuro's surname shocked me back to reality. Naegi had left. Without a second thought, I chased after the two, easily passing Naegi in his crippled state and matching the pace of the girl who I must not have known as well as I thought.

Weirdly enough, that notion alone was comforting. Ha, to think I would've been comforted by the thought of not knowing someone as well as I thought I did. Yet somewhere in my bleak, darkened heart, I had the wildest thought: maybe this revelation could mean that we could become friends after all!

… once again, just a passing notion.

oOo

The biology lab doubled as a morgue. It was the only place kept cold enough in the entirety of Hope's Peak that could possibly house dead bodies without risk of decomposition or rotting. It had been my idea. I was friendly enough with the biology lab to know quite well the exact temperature that it was (and how cold it could get) and fortunate enough to have it in my vast supply of knowledge how cold a normal morgue was kept.

Of course, Naegi had no idea of that little tidbit. And so when he attempted to pull open one of the many, green lit vaults, I couldn't find it in myself to protest.

Naegi had selected a random one, pulling experimentally on the handle before yanking with all his might, only to fall backwards onto one of the spread-out, metallic tables a moment after. "Ugh…" he groaned, "why is that so hard to budge…?"

Mukuro, without a single word passing her lips, walked over to the vault that Naegi had had such a hard time opening and forces it open with a single arm. "It seems easy to me."

"Ah… w-well I guess I shouldn't of expected different from the Super High School Level soldier…"

Mukuro leans over, peering inside the vault. "You probably don't wanna see this, by the way."

Those words only peaked Naegi's curiosity more. "What? What's in there?"

"If you're so curious, you could come see for yourself…" Mukuro, already expecting Naegi's next actions, darted out of the way as he came rushing in past her. Anticipative of Naegi's inevitable shriek, she murmurs, "but don't say I didn't warn you."

Naegi let out an ungodly wail. I pressed my palms flat over my ears, waiting for the moment to pass. Once the boy had regained his breath, I peered over to Naegi, taking note of his ashen mien. "I-It's- oh god, I'm gonna be sick!"

"Ishimaru-kun, you're not going to come see what all the fuss is about?"

"I-I'm good…"

Naegi carefully closed the vault, notably shaking. "It was Kuwata-kun's body… it was so… urgh…" After a few more moments, he sighs, "I guess this answers the question of where everyone's bodies go after investigations… the lights must indicate whether a vault is being used or not."

"Yeah… probably," I agreed. Of course, I knew this already. Eight of the lights were lit, indicating the eight deceased classmates that… we… wait-

"Um… something's not right," began Naegi, "the lights are one short."

"That's - um, I'm sure there's a logical explanation for that!"

Naegi shook his head. "I don't think so... I wouldn't put it past Monobear to have been lying all this time about the death of one of our classmates. I don't know why he would though."

Mukuro shot me a glance. "Maybe one of the deceased is the actual mastermind and they just faked their death." Mukuro shrugged, "or maybe one of them just survived, and it was too embarrassing for Monobear to call off a class trial."

Naegi tapped his chin, gaze focused securely on the floor, "no, I don't think that's it. Why would we have a class trial to execute someone that hadn't even done the deed? I mean… Yamada-kun and Oowada-kun didn't have culprits executed for their deaths, so maybe…"

Mondo… that's… that's impossible!

"No…" I murmured.

"Huh? Ishimaru-kun?"

I locked eyes with Naegi's, trying to convey all the emotion I could into that one gaze. He shrank back, uncomfortable, but I fought to push onwards. My throat constricted and clogged and with unanticipated bitterness I spat out, "I saw him die, Naegi-kun! He died in my arms!"

"Well… we never actually saw Yamada-kun's face after his death, so maybe that could've been a double?"

The topic carried on after that. I was grateful for the change, yes, but my mind stayed preoccupied on that one idea: Mondo could be alive! It was delusional, impossible, downright moronic, but the sweet sensation of hope lit up my insides.

And now that I think about it… I never did feel his heart stop, and Monobear came to take him away awfully fast-

No! I can't think like that! I'm just deluding myself!

But what if?

oOo

The day drifted on. Naegi was marveled by the greenhouse ("Huh? Oowada-kun's pickaxe? What is this doing here?") and the dojo, but there wasn't much else to be found. Well, except for-

"What the - what the hell?" Ah right, that. In all the chaos lately, it hadn't occurred to me that everyone would eventually find room 5-C. The room of the first killing game. "Everything is - people were murdered here, weren't they?" Desperately, he turned to Mukuro, grasping her shoulder. Mukuro didn't spare him even a side glance, opting to stare straight ahead into the disarray. "Ikusaba! Please, tell us something! Are you on our side now or aren't you? You know about this!"

She more than knew about this little fiasco. She'd partaken in the murder. I wasn't too keen on bringing that bit up.

After a moment of dead silence, Mukuro answered, "I don't know what happened here." She still stood stock-still, gaze unwavering and expression apathetic. Carelessly, she shrugged off his hand and mumbled, "sorry."

"... sorry?" Naegi backed away from the girl, mouth hanging open as he gaped at the room. "This… this isn't right, Ikusaba-san! People were killed here! Do you understand that?"

"Of course I do."

"Then why aren't you saying anything?" Finally, Naegi stopped backing away, fists clenched as he stared at Mukuro. "Ikusaba-san! … please. I know that you were a mole for Monobear, so… why aren't you… saying anything?"

Mukuro abided by silence, avoiding Naegi's accusations and instead venturing further into the room, casting a glance upon the blood splattered floors and walls. "I don't think there's anything left to look at here. It's just a murder scene."

Despite my stare being transfixed upon Mukuro, from my peripheral I saw Naegi visibly slouch, backing out of the room. Is he running away? "I'm gonna just… step outside." And with that, he left.

All was silent for a long moment. The pressing quietness burned into me, and the terrifying realization that oh my god this is so awkward sank into my being. It was too silent, some kind of noise needed to fill it -"u-um… so… Mukuro-"

"What?" Oh shoot, she sounds mad!

"A-Ah, nothing!"

Once again, silence.

oOo

Mukuro didn't come to the morning meeting.

"Ugh… I really messed up, didn't I? And after I got mad at you all for Maizono-san…" Naegi stuffed his face into his hands, his body shaking at the shoulders. "God, I'm such an idiot…" he turned to stare at me, eyes rimmed red around the edges, "this really is all hopeless, isn't it? Everyone's left now. Only you and me are left."

I didn't have a response to that. How was I supposed to respond? Naegi had always been the hopeful one; the one that believed that no goal was impossible. He was supposed to stand up, shout to the heavens, and march to his destination in his pursuit for hope. He wasn't supposed to feel sorrow. He wasn't supposed to feel pain. He wasn't supposed to feel despair.

"Ha…" bitterly, Naegi barked out a laugh, "I'm really pathetic, huh? And to think Kirigiri-san had once thought to call me the Super High School Level Hope… if only she could see me now. If I can't even rally you guys together during times of trouble, then how good is that title?" The boy stared at his palms. His hands visibly shook, as though having a war of their own. "And look… now I'm throwing myself a pity party. I can't…"

"Naegi-kun."

Naegi stopped his ranting, peering up at me through those red-rimmed eyes. "Huh?"

I gave pause. I didn't know what to say. What can I say? It's my fault that he's even feeling this way in the first place. Despite that - "honestly, I've never been one to hold onto hope too much. All my life, everything has always been work and repetition. I can't quite say that I've ever even known what hope truly was. And I've never been the best at emotions, so I don't know if you should take my words seriously but…" Anxiety creeped its way into my heart, twisting and turning in tandem. I don't know what to say. Why did I even start speaking? I'm only going to make things worse - words spilled from my heart and onto the floor, "I don't think that hope means that you can't feel hopelessness. I don't know if this makes sense, but without despair, who are we to judge what is and isn't hope?" I don't know where my passion came from, but all of a sudden my voice was raised and my shoulders were back. All of a sudden, I believed with absolute certainty my words. I shouldn't of. I really shouldn't of, but I couldn't help the blossoming feeling in my heart and utter relaxation that overtook me. "I think hope is being able to rise above it all. To push past the despair and let it breed hope from that."

Naegi was silent for a good moment. Then two. Then three. Cautiously, I turned my head to face him, battling the heavy blush that threatened to explode onto my face. Why did I say all of that? I'm sure I look foolish! What do I know about hope? His face was completely blank. Maybe it was my lack of social skills, but I couldn't discern in the slightest what he was feeling nor thinking. Finally he said, "huh."

Oh god, that was too intense, wasn't it? "O-Oh, uh, that was a bit forward, wasn't it? S-Sorry, I don't even know what I'm talking about - don't take my words seriously, please!"

"N-No, Ishimaru-kun, you're fine!" he gave off a chuckle, rubbing the back of his neck, "I'm just… I was surprised, that's all. Ya know, for your so-called lack of 'social skills', you really hit the nail on the head just then."

… what? "I-I did?"

Naegi nodded, humming pleasantly. "Yeah! I think you're a lot more capable of this stuff than you give yourself credit for."

"Oh… is that so?" He's so kind… if he knew-

"Aha, Ishimaru-kun, can I tell you a secret? It's kinda funny, actually."

"Uhm…" A secret? How odd! "Go on!"

"Well, uh…" His face pulled a sheepish expression, a blush crawling up his neck and to his ears. "For a long time there… I really thought you were the mastermind, you know?"

Oh.

"But, uh, with what you just said right now, I know that that couldn't possibly be true! Just now, you spoke a lot more fondly of hope than you ever could despair. And it got me thinking-"

Oh no.

"-there's no way someone like you could be the mastermind! Right, Ishimaru-kun?"

My mind shut down. This was it. The moment I've been waiting for. Naegi wasn't leaving, no one was coming to interrupt us… I could finally let all the guilt off my chest and allow Naegi to do as he will to me, whether that involve maiming me or otherwise.

The killing game could end.

"Ishimaru-kun?"

That was it. In a broken voice that I couldn't possibly possess, I repeated Naegi's renowned catchphrase, a bitter smile twisting my lips into a defeated ghost of a smile. "You've got that wrong."

And like that, the dam was broken. Everything began to spill out, from the very beginning. I told him everything. I told him about the memory wipes, the brainwashing of the remnants, the despair-filled world outside. I told him about how I had sent Junko Enoshima to her death after her betrayal of me, and how until recently Mukuro had made it her mission to kill me no matter what. I told him about how I had lost control of Monobear after the first trial, and how unnamed people now were the main people controlling the killing game.

"... and that's it," I breath, a feeling of warmth spreading through my chest. I was going to die, but I felt happy. The moment I stepped into Hope's Peak, I was betraying my title. Maybe I could finally atone. Maybe in these last few moments of my life, I could make things right and finally act as a Super High School Level Prefect was supposed to.

Naegi was silent.

"Naegi-kun, you have every right to hate me. I am a despicable human being. I've betrayed you all, and no amount of my own self-deprecation or your hatred could ever make up for that. You are more than free to kill me, maim me, and torture me however you like. But in these last hours before I die, I cannot allow the state of our classmates to continue as they are!"

Naegi's face was completely, indecipherably blank. He stared down at his lap, palms clenched on top of his knees. "To tell you the truth, I don't know if I hate you. I don't know if I can trust you when you say that you want to bring our classmates back together or not. And honestly, I don't know if I can even find it in myself to blame you for absolutely everything that has happened this entire game."

"Naegi-"

"You were her puppet, weren't you? Even despite you claiming that a lot of this killing game was your idea, something doesn't add up. I don't know what it is yet, but something is off."

… her puppet?

"And I saw your interactions with Oowada when he was dying. He remembered, didn't he? In his last moments, he remembered everything that happened, and he looked at you and said that he knew that you weren't evil. And when he died, you mourned so much that you turned into a completely different person," his shoulders began to shake again, and a certain sharp edge overtook his voice, "tell me, was that just a lie?"

No. Absolutely not. I loved Mondo-

… loved?

Yes, I loved Mondo!

"Naegi, I-" a sharp pang resounded through my skull. What the-? A flash of another time, another place played in my mind's eye. I couldn't identify what that memory exactly was, but I saw myself and Mondo. I saw him, and we were leaning into each other. This me wasn't orchestrating a killing game. In fact, if it wasn't for a certain blonde someone, the killing game never would've occurred, because I had never planned it!

The memory (?) died out, leaving a trail of confusion in its' wake. Was that actually me? Or was that just a forlorn fantasy?

Before I could question it further, another pang fired, and another memory flashed before my eyes.

oOo

"Hm, hm…" When I awoke, restraints were binding me. I gave them a light tug, testing the strength of the chains. They weren't letting up. A woman hummed pleasantly in front of me, her skirt short and revealing and her pigtails tight and constricting.

"... Enoshima-kun?" My classmate. "W-What's-" I groaned, my head pounding. A concussion? "What's going on? Where am I?"

"Hehe… wouldn't you like to know?" Enoshima peered over her shoulder, her cute facade disappearing as soon as it had come. "Mukuro!" Another one of my classmates? Is this a weird practical joke? I had dealt with delinquents who had decided to seek vengeance on me through pranks before, but never to this extent! Besides, save for the snarky side comment from Enoshima from time to time, both her and Ikusaba were model students!

I didn't hear the footsteps. Next thing I know, a pair of calloused hands are peeling my eyes open with metal clamps, clipping my eyelids to my eyebrows and cheek fat. It hurt. It hurt so bad. "Agh! Ikusaba-kun, what are you doing? Y-You're both going to get detention for this!" Enoshima snickered in front of me, a monochrome bear plushie clasped to her chest.

"Don't worry 'bout it, Taka! We just have a special video for you that we're just itching to try out, so just sit back and enjoy the show! We don't want you missing a single thing, so Mukuro has taken the honors of helping you out!"

Oh… well that's a rather odd way of trying to help me, and a rather brash way of trying to get me to watch a silly video! I mean, kidnapping! They kidnapped me just to watch one video!

"Enoshima-kun, I assure you, I would've come if you had just asked! It would be my duty as class rep to! And I promise you that I will not miss anything in the video, so please take these things off of my eyes!" Oh gods, they were really burning now. Liquid began to fill my view and a couple stray, thin tears streamed down my face.

"Oh, well we don't want to take that chance, do we?"

"Enoshima-kun! Please!"

"Hm, hm… just sit back and enjoy, Ishimaru! I promise you will!" With that, Enoshima disappeared out of my line of sight and a television took her place. A video loaded up, buffered, and for a moment, all was quiet. The next moment-

"Agh! No, NO, WHAT ARE YOU MAKING ME WATCH?"

"Mukuro~! You know what to do!"

Twin stabbing sensations lit up my head and scraped against my brain, and I screamed so loud that my voice went hoarse. "PLEASE! ENOSHIMA, IKUSABA, LET ME OUT OF HERE!"

"Nuh-uh! You promised to watch the video, right?"

Blood. Guts. Gore. Slaughter. Murder. Suicide.

Despair.

Despair.

R.

"I'M BEGGING YOU! LET ME OUT!"

"Mukuro, you're not doing it hard enough! More!"

"AGGGGGH! PLEASE, I'LL DO ANYTHING!"

Despair.

Despair.

Despair.

"ANYTHING!"

Kill. Murder. Hurt. Anguish. Pain. Hopelessness.

"I…"

Despair.

"I can't…"

Despair.

"Pl...e...ase."

Ikusaba shifted, and with her my brain did as well. A light switch turned on, and a bubbling laugh tore out of my throat. I didn't know why, but everything suddenly made sense. All of the agony that my parents had suffered through, all of the hate and angered words that people had thrown my way. Yes. Yes, I understand now!

"Ah… yes, that's right-!"

oOo

Without realizing it, I had fallen out of my chair. An agonizing pain settled over me, burning and twisting my insides into dirt. Distantly I heard Naegi call for help, but I couldn't find it in me to care about that.

I was brainwashed.

Junko Enoshima and Mukuro Ikusaba had brainwashed me, just as they had the remnants.

So what does that make me? A remnant of despair as well?

Or am I something else entirely? A forlorn instrument tossed away as soon as its' use was dried up? That would explain the sudden loss of control of Monobear. That would explain my memories. That would explain everything, really.

God, I missed him.

I remember now.

I remember everything.

And if I thought the pain of losing him was bad before, it was nothing compared to the complete misery I feel now..

I couldn't move my body. Naegi shook me and yelled at me, but I couldn't hear anything he was saying. He looked panicked… speaking of which, had Naegi always looked like that? Or am I not remembering something else now?

I'm so tired…

So... ti

oOo

When I came to, I was in the nurse's office. Naegi was sat besides me, dark bags under his eyes and his mouth set in a thin, straight line. When he noticed I was awake he hopped up from his post immediately, placing a lukewarm towel atop my forehead and sticking a thermometer straight into my open mouth.

"Naegi-kun?" It came out garbled and scratchy, but the name still tore from my throat, a lingering question laced with it. Naegi simply stared at me, his brows furrowed and his cheeks a bit sunken. Ah, right… he was still injured, wasn't he? "Um, are you sure you should be looking over me in your condition?"

"No one came to help when I called… so I've been monitoring you."

"Uhm… for how long?"

"I don't know… fourteen hours?"

At that I sat straight up, ignoring Naegi's yelp of protest as I clutched my head, a sharp pang suddenly pounding through my skull. Nevertheless, "f-fourteen hours? Isn't it well past nighttime, then? Shouldn't you be asleep?"

"Well," he scratched his cheek, his ears and neck suddenly blazing hot, "I didn't wanna leave you all alone. If you woke up then immediately went back to sleep it would count as sleeping outside the dorms." After a moment's hesitation, he elaborated, "since you passed out, it was a loophole to that rule."

I nodded, even though I couldn't quite understand what he was saying through the muddled fog of my mind. However - "I already told you, I'm the mastermind. Why should you care what happens to me?"

"Ah… you were brainwashed, weren't you?"

"Brainwashed?"

"Yeah, um," sighing, Naegi turned around, head hung low, "I heard you say as much just before you passed out."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

For a moment, silence stretched. I must've been speaking aloud after that flashback… god, how embarrassing! By that logic, he also would've heard about Mondo and-

"It's not embarrassing, you know."

… What? Did I speak out loud again?

"And no, you didn't speak out loud. I'm just pretty good with people, I think. It's about the only thing I am good at, haha… besides being optimistic, I suppose."

I didn't know what to say, so I opted for silence, studying the way that the small boy's shoulders tensed and untensed, as if having a fierce debate with themselves.

"Hey, Ishimaru…"

"... yeah?"

"You said you wanted to help unite our classmates again, didn't you?"

I nodded despite him not being able to see me. After a moment, I murmured in affirmation.

"Then we have the same goal in mind, don't we? What's stopping us from working together?" Logically, I knew the answer already. Nothing. Absolutely nothing. I wasn't the mastermind (apparently), I wished to unite our enemies against a common foe, and I did deeply care for our classmates, the same exact way that Naegi did. However, the fact of the matter was that no one would possibly trust me once I revealed my position as the former mastermind of this killing game. No one would have a reason to trust me.

I was beginning to believe that Naegi had a secret talent that he had neglected to inform the rest of us about when the next words out of his mouth were: "I won't tell anyone about what you've told me. And I suggest you do the same. If we're going to end this killing game, we need everyone on the same page, right?"

"Right. You're right, Naegi-kun."

"Heh… you didn't have to say it twice, ya know."

A smile split my face. This. This was friendship… well, maybe not, but it sure felt like it, and before I knew it-

"hey, Naegi-kun… are we friends?"

"Hm?" Naegi spun around, and I saw his face for the first time in this whole exchange. His gaze was unrelenting, unyielding and I found myself both mystified and terrified by it. After a moment, his stare broke away from mine and turned to instead burn a hole through the sheets next to me. "Ah, well-"

Shoot! "N-Nevermind, Naegi-kun! Haha, I was just being foolish, there's no way that… that…" Ugh, why were my eyes burning? This is stupid; I'm stupid, of course he doesn't think of me as a friend! Look at what I just told him earlier!

"Oh, no, Ishimaru-kun!" He held up his hands in protest, waving them around frantically. "I was just surprised, that's all! I didn't think you were the type to care about that kind of stuff!" There's a lot he didn't know about me before today, huh?

"You don't have to feel obligated to answer."

"I don't feel obligated to do anything." Naegi gave me a soft smile, and just the sight of it made my eyes fill up with tears, just on the verge of leaking out. "Of course we're friends. Do you really think I would plan to end the killing game with just anyone?"

"Well… it's just because I know the most out of anyone here, save for maybe Mukuro… so you…"

"No, Ishimaru-kun," I refused to look at the boy in front of me, but I could just sense the boy's gaze, and that unrelenting feeling increased tenfold once I felt a delicate hand rest on my shoulder. "Maybe that's part of it, but I would never agree to do this with you if I didn't trust you. And trust is a big part of friendships, you know."

Naegi…

A few tears leaked out of my eyes, then a few more, and before I knew it an entire stream was falling freely down my face.

"Ah! Ishimaru-kun!"

"Sorry, Naegi-kun… I'm just…" Happy. So happy. I have a friend! "Tired."

"No, don't fall asleep here! C'mon, let me try to get you back to the dorms! … though I may be more of a burden than anything…"

oOo

The next day, Kirigiri joined us for our morning meeting.

Immediately, I suspected the worst. With a sharp turn and loud huff I turned towards Naegi, an accusatory question just on the tip of my tongue, and a sudden realization came to me.

Naegi looked so happy. I can't take that away from him. That's not what friends do.

"Kirigiri-san… you're here."

The detective nodded, a pretty smile upon her lips. She nodded towards me, gaze unwavering but unsuspecting (at least… I don't think so). With a cool stride and a flip of her long, lavender hair, she plopped down right across from Naegi, her gloved fingertips caressing her chin.

"We should have our meeting in the bathhouse today."

oOo

Kirigiri leaned against the lockers, one leg crossed over the other as she gazed towards the floor. Her face squinted in concentration, and I could only begin to imagine the kinds of thoughts running through her mind. The plan was a longshot. I knew that. Naegi knew that. Kirigiri? She was nothing if not realistic.

Perhaps that was why her next couple words paralyzed me. "Alright. Let's do it."

Naegi seemed to be of similar opinion, only gaping at Kirigiri in dumb shock. His mouth hung open slightly and a wiry smile slowly graced his lips; a dopey, childlike innocence taking hold of him. "R-Really? For real?"

Kirigiri merely raised a singular eyebrow, and if not for the slight inclination of the corners of her mouth I would've colored her as annoyed. "Yeah."

Naegi closed the distance between them, arms spread wide open, but stopped just short of the girl, as if asking for permission. Kirigiri nodded, hugging the boy back with far less vigor as he nearly tackled her into a hug. A red tint lit her cheeks, marred slightly by lavender locks and the corner of Naegi's shoulder.

If I didn't know better, I would dare say they looked like a couple.

"However, I'm sure you're aware of how optimistic this all sounds. I doubt the mastermind would take all of us defying the killing game so kindly."

Naegi, now back to his usual position, nods. "Of course. But we have to try. Until now, we've just been going along with motive after motive, and each time someone dies. I'm sick of my friends dying."

"But outright ignoring them? The mastermind will start taking drastic measures."

"I know. And that's the plan. If we ever plan on stopping the mastermind of this killing game, we have to back them into a corner."

"Hm… very astute, Naegi-kun," Kirigiri turned her gaze to me, and I could've sworn that the glimmer in her eyes suddenly turned ten-times more piercing. She still suspected me. Something told me that she wouldn't be near as understanding regarding the whole mastermind incident as Naegi. "And you, Ishimaru-kun? What's your motive?"

"Well, uh…" My motive? That's obvious, isn't it? When I closed my eyes, I could see them. Mondo and Chihiro. They looked at me, a twinkle in their eyes and a bounce in their step. I was holding Mondo's hand. Chihiro was telling us about the latest game he bought. We were happy. We were like a family.

Now…

… both of them are dead.

With a conviction I didn't think possible, I spoke, "I can't allow anymore of my friends to die. This… this game has taken too many lives. I can't let you guys die too."

The answer seemed to satisfy Kirigiri. Naegi and Kirigiri carried on with their discussions, but I tuned them out completely, watching overhead as the three students planned the future.

I was one of them.

I was going to end this killing game. And when we broke out of here, I would bury Mondo and Chihiro.

Mondo, Chihiro… I know I've let you down in the past, and I know that I can't really make up for most of it. But I promise that I'll end this killing game. Not just for your sake, but for mine too.

No matter what.

Ooooo! I know this is a short chapter, but I hope I made up for it with all the plot stuff!

Question: what are your expectations for the finale of Despairingly Perfect? I know that seems like a long jump away from where we currently are, but we're on the fifth arc guys! And the sixth arc isn't going to be very long.

Side note: really regretting starting this fic in first person. Third person is much more tolerable to read and I can be so much more detailed and creative with it. I decided the sequels are going to be in third person, and there's a point in the near future of this fic where I'll have the opportunity to permanently shift the POV to third person, so I think I'll do that.

Anyways, like I said, don't expect chapters every Thursday from now on, but they still will be frequent! I'll try to have the next chapter out by the 28th, but no promises! (I've decided on giving you a general approximation on when the next chapter will be instead. This way I'm not constraining myself, and you'll know when to keep an eye out!)

See ya guys in the next chapter, "the Remnants of Hope"! Ooooh, wonder what that could mean ;)