IMPORTANT INFO: First of all, this is an alternative universe fic, where the characters are not mages and they are also a little older and live in a more modern day society. Think early twenties, as Levy, Lucy and Cana are almost finished with college. This is mostly going to be a Gajeel x Levy fic, but I will also be including LuLo in honor of my fellow writer friend Crimsonwolfko. There is mention of Lucy having feelings for Natsu, but there isn't plans of NaLu necessarily being romantic past that point, although I'm not closed off to the idea either. I just want people to be aware, I'm not trying to lead anyone on. Gruvia and Jerza will also be included in later chapters, but they won't be as prevalent as Gajeel and Levy. This is a Gajevy driven plot, but all ships will have a meaningful role or purpose in the story that ties to their plot.

Initially I didn't have plans for this to be a very long story. In fact, when I first dreamt it up it was just going to be a one shot, but I realized pretty quickly while writing the first chapter that it was going to be far too long. Once I figured this out, I then made plans for the story to be completed upon the conclusion of chapter 7, but as I worked my way to this point, I realized I had set a lot groundwork for something far bigger. I had always thought I might continue it and make the story a full-blown, novel-sized project and after getting the opinions of my readers, I decided to do just that. So please know that this is going to be very long (as you may have already noticed) and it is still ongoing. I can't tell you just yet when the conclusion is coming or the full length, because I don't know how many chapters it will take for me to get to it. Just know that I do plan on getting there, but it might take a lot of time. It's already taken me over 3 years to get where I am now, life doing its part to slow me down, but that's okay… I have faith in my continued journey to the destination, despite the harsh detours.

Also, a warning, this fic will end up being more graphic, sexual and just an all-around darker themed story including, but not limited to such situations like sexual assault/near rape, language, abuse, tragedy, extreme violence and torture. Thus, the high rating. I promise to keep the narrative as entertaining and tasteful as I can, even while dealing with such questionable topics, but either way I need people to be aware. Just please take that into consideration before reading this, because if you don't handle these topics too well, then this just may not be the story for you. It certainly isn't for the faint of heart, what with its current content and also with what is to come in future chapters.

And lastly, be warned that there may be errors, as much as I've toiled over this thing, I'm sure I will still miss stuff. It is very long and I usually do all of my own editing. It is exhausting and I wouldn't say I excel at it.

Monster

Chapter 1: Weight

The club outing tonight had been arranged as a means to escape the building pressures of the senior semester. They had wanted to relax and have a good time, but more than anything they had wanted to get away from men. At least that had been the plan seeing as all three girls were fed up with the ones in their lives. Cana had, had it with her father who had disappeared once again, without so much as a word to her.

As important and influential as Gildarts was it seemed like he never took anything seriously. His name was one of the most well known in Magnolia, because he was both a former hero and entrepreneur of the town alongside an old man by the name of Makarov. The two of them had even opened up the town's university together, but Gildarts had grown bored of the businessman life style. It had never really suited his taste to begin with, but he hadn't anything better to do while in recovery after losing his leg. That and he had managed to come across a lot of money after being injured in action. Now that he was fully recovered and had adjusted to his new limb, he spent his days traveling in the name of charity as a means to escape it all.

He had basically left Makarov to deal with all of their business dealings and as for Cana? Well he hadn't known he had a daughter at first, but once he found out, he made sure that she was well taken care of. He had even given her, her own card with access to one of his many bank accounts, as well as paid for all of her schooling as she attended the university him and Makarov had created. The only issue was Cana hadn't wanted to be taken care of.

All she had truly desired was to spend time with the man she had always known was her father. Now that he knew the truth she had hoped things would be different, but it wasn't looking that way, as she one day discovered that Gildarts had left again. He had taken nothing, but cash and the clothes on his back. He had left his small modest cabin open for her to stay in while he was gone, but… None of that filled the gaping hole Cana felt inside and so that was why; that was why it had been her brilliant idea that the three of them have a girl's night, because Gildarts was funding it.

Levy and Lucy weren't really the 'partying' type of girls. A fun evening for them usually consisted of reading or having a movie night together. Maybe sometimes they would go out, but not to the types of places Cana liked to frequent. They probably would have both backed out, if they hadn't picked up on the fact that Cana was upset and thus, they did not want to let her be alone. They were all friends and classmates after all. Cana had overheard the two best friends venting to each other one day while sitting in the school's small café between classes.

Lucy was also upset with her father as he continued to harass her about finishing her degree at Makarov's school, seeing as he wasn't a fan of the tiny old man. Jude Heartfilia was another wealthy entrepreneur from another town and he found Master Makarov's unorthodox way of doing business, degrading. He had refused to help Lucy financially, that included helping her pay for any of her schooling or signing any of her loans seeing, as she had chosen a school he didn't approve of.

Jude had hoped by cutting Lucy off she would do what he wanted, but his plan hadn't had the desired affects in the slightest. If anything, his idea had just driven Lucy to defy him even further by stirring up some great ambition inside of her, to prove she didn't need any of his money, nor approval to get what she wanted. She had even gone so far as to fund herself completely by taking out all of her own loans and by signing up for any financial aid, as well as scholarships that she could. Not only that, but she worked her hands to the bone in an effort to survive and continue to pay her way through school all on her own.

All of this for three years and now that she was finally nearing graduation, her father just wouldn't leave her be. Instead of congratulating Lucy, he responded by fighting with her and arguing with her every chance he got. Constantly calling, leaving her angry voicemails. It had left the poor girl, who was already stressed out from finals and work, completely burnt out.

All of this may have been all right, seeing as Lucy was used to her dad's negative attitude and could usually bounce back, but unfortunately, he wasn't the only issue she was having with men right now. The other major problem that had really been eating at her, was with her best friend Natsu Dragneel. Ever since he had started dating Lisanna Strauss, another student at their school for the past month, it was like he never made time for her anymore.

Now Lucy was somewhat understanding of this, seeing as the two of them had finally gotten together after years of Natsu always liking the flaxen haired beauty; so, in truth there was a large part of her that was very happy for him, for both of them, but at the same time she couldn't seem to help the fact that it still it hurt her as well. Especially right now, when she needed his support more than ever, what with all the fighting she had been doing with her father.

Natsu had always been the one she turned too whenever things with her father got this serious, but now it was like he couldn't spare her the time of day. Every time she texted him he would either say he was out with Lisanna or he just wouldn't respond for hours. When he finally would get back to her, he would always apologize. Indicating that he did feel bad for blowing her off, but not enough to leave his new girlfriend's side, long enough to allow Lucy to lean on him for a bit. She was pretty torn up about the whole thing, but she tried to put on a brave front most of the time.

Levy had been able to see through this though, as she was Lucy's best girlfriend. She had kind of figured out that Lucy had feelings for Natsu. Feelings that were beyond that of friendship a while ago and so she knew the blond was actually heartbroken beneath it all. After some clever wordplay, she had managed to get Lucy to confirm her suspicions that day at the café, but that also included the lengthily rant about her father as well. That had been the part Cana had overheard the two girls going on about, when she had approached them. It was, because of all of this that Lucy had been the first one to jump on board with Cana's 'let's go out and forget about men' plan when she had flashed the two girls her shiny, Gildart's signed credit card.

Levy had been a bit harder to convince even though she was no different with her current attitude towards the opposite sex at the moment. Her issues stemmed from two very lovesick best friends, whom also loved to argue and fight over her any chance they got, especially lately. Things were reaching a whole new level of crazy though, for the weekend prior they had actually made a scene in public on the quad, throwing punches at each other. Not only did they nearly get the cops called on them, but people had gotten the wrong impression of her now too. Levy had started to notice people looking at her funny ever since that day and whispering things, all suspecting her of leading both of them on or having some odd swinger relationship with the two of them.

Levy wasn't pleased with the attention at all. She preferred the quiet life style, but now everyone at school seemed to know who she was. Not only that, but it had gotten much worse. Guys had started approaching her with cheap pick-up lines. The really suggestive kind that made it clear they were only after one thing, as if they thought she could be a quick notch on their belts. It had left poor Levy mortified and furious with Jet and Droy, the two friends responsible. She hadn't spoken to them all week, but it hadn't stopped them from following her around and begging for her forgiveness every chance they got. As if only to make her more embarrassed, by making it seem like everything people were saying about the three of them, was indeed true.

It was making her crazy inside, because she couldn't study in peace anymore. One day she had even had some guy sneak up behind her and slap her ass, before running away. This was probably one of the more embarrassing moments of her life. She had turned around red faced but hadn't been able to spot who it had been, as they had quickly ducked away among the crowds of people. She did however, hear the culprit's laughter echoing somewhere behind her.

She knew it would all blow over eventually and people would soon forget, but as of now, the harassment was making her life a living hell, so if there was any time a girl could be convinced to go out and get drunk, it was probably right now.

Cana had promised Levy and Lucy that she knew a great place where nobody from their school frequented, so they would be safe from embarrassment with anyone who mattered. The girls had still been pretty uneasy about the whole plan, especially where Levy was concerned and weren't completely sold on it until Cana had told them they would also be getting their nails done and would be buying new clothes for the occasion all courtesy of Gildarts money, unbeknownst to him of course. It was hard to say no to that tall order, especially when Cana was so convincing. She had somehow manipulated it, to make it sound like they would be doing her old man a favor by accompanying her, as she blew some of his money away.

That afternoon they had spent the whole day shopping, getting their nails done and even made time for a big lunch. Once all of that was done they all went their separate ways, returning back home to their individual apartments, to waste time getting ready, before they all met up again to go out.

Cana had agreed to let them use her car, so long as Lucy agreed to be the one driving it, with plans of not being sober later, unbeknownst to the other two girls. Lucy naively agreed, taking possession of the keys and now here the three of them were at the club. Surrounded by moving bodies with bright neon colors bouncing off of their faces in the dim lighting.

Well, really it was just the two of them, because Cana had already ditched Lucy and Levy for a crowd of men at the bar. The 'girl's night' plan hadn't lasted more than twenty minutes; all Cana had said was that she was going to grab a drink and then she never came back to the dance floor. Leaving Levy and Lucy like two lost puppies in a sea of warm bodies, both of them clinging to each other among the crowded space as if they were each other's security blanket.

Levy had one of her hands gripping to Lucy's elbow and Lucy in return had her hand on Levy's shoulder. Both of them were tense as they attempted to dance amongst the overwhelming heat and smell of sweat. Their bodies being pushed to and fro by the other dancers, who didn't mind where they were going. The whole situation made both girls very uneasy and it didn't help that neither of them had touched a drop of alcohol since they had arrived, unlike the rest of the people dancing.

Finally, one large tan shirtless body came crashing into Levy's back so hard it propelled her small frame forward. Luckily, she ran into Lucy, who caught the smaller girl before she completely lost her balance and hit the floor, but for Lucy this was the last straw. All of her patience had thinned. The blonde's brow lowered and her fist clenched. She moved Levy aside gently, before reaching up to the large man who had crashed into her.

Her hand came slamming down onto his shoulder, causing him to turn around with a confused look on his face. Lucy paused for a moment, surprised by his odd appearance, almost forgetting to speak as he raised a dark thin eyebrow at her. It was his crazy hair that had caught her off guard; it was split into two colors, red on the left and white on the right. Once she got over the initial shock of that, she quickly remembered how annoyed she was.

"Hey! What gives! You almost knocked over my friend-" The furious blond began to shout at him, pointing to Levy who stood there shyly, clearly looking embarrassed by the whole scene Lucy was creating. "With your mosh pitting or whatever the hell you were doing! Will you watch where you are going?!" Lucy finished, her tone only growing. The guy Lucy was yelling at, only blinked in response, almost as if he were confused. His face was dripping with sweat and his eyes were bloodshot. It was clear he had been drinking. His mouth opened as Lucy gave him a death stare, but he didn't get a chance to say anything, because someone else decided to step in instead.

"Watch it bitch! I know you're not talking to MY boyfriend like that!" A fierce woman's voice snapped, as two pale arms suddenly wrapped around the tan man's tattooed bicep. Two angry blue eyes suddenly appeared from behind the man. The glare this woman shot Lucy, more than rivaled her own angry stare. The taller woman had long light blue hair, that stretched down to her waistline.

Lucy didn't appear intimidated, but Levy on the other hand, was on the verge of sneaking away from the commotion, fearful of what might happen next. She didn't need another situation like the weekend before, falling over her again and plus she disliked conflict.

"Oh yes I was! He should watch where he's going! He nearly trampled my friend!" Lucy shouted as she pointed again to Levy, who had been slowly slinking away, but then stopped. The tiny girl's face was growing red as the crowd that had formed around their small group, thanks to Lucy's outburst, turned their attention to her at that moment. The angry blue haired woman didn't remove her eyes from Lucy as she slowly let go of her boyfriend's arm, so that she could step up closer, to the clearly shorter blond.

"Ya know what…. it's fine! Really, Lucy! I'm fine, we're fine, just let it go…" Levy started stuttering nervously, as Lucy and the blue haired woman gave each other an intense stare down.

"Look blondie." The blue haired woman began, making Lucy's jaw drop in outrage. "I get that you're not from around here, but you don't want to mess with me." She finished her voice cold and deadly. Lucy stared into her dark blue eyes. Sweat had formed on her brow and her fist were shaking at her sides, out of both anger and some slight fear. This woman was intimidating, to the say the least, but she just couldn't quite grasp why.

The blue haired woman smirked as she could see Lucy's resolve breaking under her tough exterior. At this point, Levy had approached Lucy and was tugging on her arm.

"Come on... Lucy…" Levy was mumbling as her eyes glanced around nervously. "Just let it go… I wanna take a break from dancing anyways…" The woman suddenly backed away from Lucy's face and chuckled to herself arrogantly. She flipped a hand through her long hair, as she turned her back to Lucy in a rather defiant action.

"That's right, listen to your friend. Walk away little girl, before you get hurt." At this Lucy was grinding her teeth, her anger making it too difficult for her to get any coherent sentences out.

"Why?! You! I! I'ma! Gah!" The blond was spitting as she waved an arm at the blue haired woman's back. The woman just laughed again at the furious blonde's reaction and then she smirked at her from over her shoulder.

"Now go and find yourself a man. Maybe it will help with that attitude of yours." Lucy dropped her fist at this and stood there flabbergasted, her feet no longer planted, allowing Levy to finally succeed in dragging her taller, blond friend away.

"Hey!" Lucy began to shout as Levy continued to pull and drag her away, finally getting her wits about her. "I don't need a man! Bitch!" She added, just as the blue haired woman had disappeared from view behind the crowd, still dawning that same arrogant smirk. People were looking at them as Lucy's loud voice resounded in the air and her arms waved in anger, making Levy duck her head some as if to hide, as she continued to drag her riled friend a safe distance away.

Finally, Levy had managed to find a small clearing far away from the dance floor, before she stopped walking. It was a lot less crowded in this area and people had finally stopped looking at them. Also, the speakers were no longer right on top of them, so now they could actually hear each other talk without having to yell. Levy let go of Lucy's wrist and turned towards her, letting out a breath. Lucy stood there, looking defeated as she hung her head and arms. Levy glanced up at her friend sympathetically and reached a hand out to the blonde's shoulder.

"It's okay Lu." Levy chimed in cheerfully, trying to lighten the mood, but all she earned was a disbelieving glare in return.

"How can you say that Levy? That guy nearly took you out!" Lucy replied making Levy just laugh modestly as Lucy stood up straight, her arms folding grumpily.

"It's okay! You tried to defend me…" Levy let her hand tap on Lucy's shoulder. "That's what counts." She added with a large smile at the blond. Lucy let out an accepting breath at Levy's words.

"Yea… I guess… What a bitch that woman was! They were the ones in the wrong! Then the nerve of her telling me I need a man! That's the LAST thing I need right now! I'm sick of men!" The blond replied as if exasperated.

Levy just smiled at her friend sorrowfully, before her eyes suddenly widened as if a new thought had just struck her. Levy's lips curled up deviously, as she tapped on Lucy's shoulder again, causing the blonde's brown eyes to dawn her with an unsuspecting look.

"You have to admit it though-" One of Levy's eyes was closing as she winked at Lucy, her sly smile growing into a full out grin. "Finding one here wouldn't be so bad!" Lucy just blinked at Levy for the moment, taking in the girl's carefree smile; clearly Levy was joking, right?

"What're you... getting at Levy?" Lucy asked cautiously, confused by the statement. At this question, Levy's eyes rolled around the room slowly, as if she was trying to approach the subject innocently.

"Well… Don't get me wrong." Her eyes landed back on Lucy. "I'm sick of men too, but at the same timmmmee." She responded dragging the last word out. "It wouldn't be so bad…" Now her words were coming out slow and hesitant and Lucy could see her cheeks turning a slight shade of pink. "If… ya know… Just for tonight I mean… Just this once-" Again Levy's words were stuttering out and she was shaking her head and hands now. "Not any other time! Or ever again! Not ever, ever again!" Her words were coming out defensively before she could even really say anything. "Just ya know like a, a…"

"Spit it out already!" Lucy cried out with an eyebrow raised, as she was becoming impatient by Levy's hesitant build up.

"A hook up!" Levy finally spat, her cheeks now going from a soft shade of pink to clearly red, at her own words.

Lucy just stared at Levy for a moment, completely dumb founded, because she could see Levy had been playing it off as a joke at first, but then she could sense that a small part of her was serious too. A hook up? Once she got over the initial shock that Levy had actually said that to her, the idea of it began to take form in the blonde's head. This form consisting of eroticimages that began to bounce around Lucy's brain, before she could even really stop them and within seconds, her face had become an even brighter shade of red, than even Levy's. Her brown eyes were averting upwards from the awkwardness of the moment.

"Uhhh… Lucy?" Levy questioned.

"Levy! What's gotten into you?!" Lucy suddenly snapped. Her eyes were landing back down to Levy's, her face was still very clearly red. At this reaction Levy, couldn't help, but chuckle softly at her exasperated and embarrassed friend.

"Is it really all that crazy, that'd I say that?" Levy asked her friend, her words now coming out normal sounding. Lucy glanced up at Levy clearly puzzled, her face still red, but the color was finally beginning to fade.

"Well… Yea. That's just not you." Lucy said, her voice calm now, as Levy averted her eyes downwards. Levy's expression looked a bit sad, but she was still smiling weakly.

"You're right…" She glanced back up to Lucy, who was now looking at her as if she was a bit concerned. "I'm just lonely is all." She stated honestly as she looked back down. "I haven't had a boyfriend in ages and I can't remember the last time I went on a date, let alone had sex… I have kind of stopped keeping track, as the months have gone by, what with school and all… It's kept me pretty busy and preoccupied… But… Not enough to make me forget it all of the time." She glanced up at Lucy, her large doe eyes looking even sadder now. "I'm sorry, that was a stupid thing to say."

Lucy could feel her heart crumbling into a ball at Levy's words, because she felt the exact same way. She reached a hand out and rested it on Levy's shoulder this time and shook her head.

"No, no it's not. I understand where you're coming from Levy."

"You do?"

"Yea… I haven't had a date in forever either… And it's not like I don't get asked or anything." Lucy took her hand back and let it run through her golden hair slowly and awkwardly. "I just… I don't know… I feel like maybe I always turn them down, because they're not what I'm looking for." Lucy paused for a moment, her eyes looking off and even sadder. "It's like I make excuses for myself. This guy is too loud, this guy is too tall, this guy likes stuff I hate, ya know?" Her hand finally fell back down to her side limply as if defeated. "Stupid things like that, that don't even make sense… Then I tell myself I'll know when I find the guy I really want… But until then, I'd like to skip over all of this dating random people stuff. Save myself the heartache and pain of break ups and let downs and just get to the real thing." Lucy's chocolate eyes glanced back up at Levy who was watching her intensely, hanging on the blonde's every word.

"Oh yea?" Levy uttered. Lucy shook her head, frustrated by her own musings as she revealed them to Levy.

"Yes!" She answered as if about ready to pull her own hair out, "But the even dumber thing is, I thought I did find him…! But it just so turns out… That he is in love with someone else and always has been! And now! Now they're together! Happily, I might add..." Lucy finished, her voice going soft now, as it was her turn to look forlorn. Sad thoughts were beginning to completely consume her. Levy matched Lucy with her own sympathetic look this time.

"You really miss Natsu, huh?" The blue haired girl asked. The blond just nodded her head as she stared at her own feet, before glancing back up.

"I feel so stupid Levy…. I knew how he felt about her and yet it didn't stop me from falling for him anyways… He is my best friend." She raised her hands again with frustration. "And here I am keeping myself from moving on… When I can't even spend time with him." She matched eyes with Levy again. "It's like I choose to put myself through this pain, just so I can see him happy, but I won't let myself be." At this Levy looked down to the floor, as she could feel the tears threatening to spill at Lucy's sincere and sad confession, but she swallowed it down, determined to not break for Lucy's sake.

"Happiness is fleeting-" Levy spoke before bringing her head back up. "Especially when you've got so much stress on your shoulders." She finished. Lucy looked back up at Levy and they both exchanged a certain look as they let it all sink in for a moment. Then Lucy suddenly tilted her head and squinted her eyelids at Levy.

"Say, I told you my reasons for not dating, but how come you don't? I mean… you can't tell me, you don't get asked. I mean heck, I know you have been approached a lot this week… Even if it was stressing you out, it still happened." Lucy suddenly asked as if the thought had just occurred to her.

"Well… They weren't exactly asking me out." Levy stated flatly. "More like just implying that they wanted to have sex with me." She added. Lucy couldn't help but smile awkwardly.

"Jeeze… It's really that bad, huh?" Lucy questioned as Levy smiled and looked to her feet, before looking back up at Lucy with a sigh.

"Yea… It's okay though. I know it will blow over soon, but for the time being it sucks." Levy replied, causing Lucy to giggle.

"If you're not interested in any of these guys who want to sleep with you, then why are you talking about hooking up?! It doesn't make any sense!" Levy's cheeks flushed up again at Lucy's point-blank question and her hazel eyes shifted around the room awkwardly for a moment, before answering.

"Well it's just…" Levy's head bobbed, as did her feet, as her eyes looked off in the distance. "I don't want anyone like that." As the words left her mouth, she glanced back to Lucy's perplexed face and she could plainly see that the blond didn't understand what she meant by that statement. She knew she needed to elaborate, but it was just hard to find the right words to explain it in a way that could make sense. "What I mean is… I don't want anyone who has anything to do with my life right now." Lucy's eyes narrowed in on Levy at the odd phrasing and her head tilted even more in confusion.

"Okay… I don't think I'm quite grasping this all just yet… I know you can't mean Jet and Droy." Levy bounced again on her heels, her anxiety was building as she shook her head.

"No, I wasn't referring to them at all. You know where I stand with those two; they're like brothers to me, even if they don't feel the same way and want more." Levy retorted as she rolled her eyes, her mind drifting back to the incident and all of the misery it had caused her. Yep, she was still quite irritated with her two best friends. She shook her head again, in an attempt to get her mind off of it, as she tried once again to explain herself better to Lucy. "What I mean is, I don't want anyone who is even remotely involved or related to my life." She glanced down at her hand and began naming fingers. "I don't want it to be someone I'm friends with, someone I work with, someone who even goes to our school. I don't even want it to be someone I share the bus with!" She exclaimed seriously. "That way it can never come back to haunt me. That way it could be a one and done kind of deal and I won't ever have to worry about the repercussions of having to see that person again."

Lucy was staring at Levy as if she had grown a second head now; everything she was saying now made complete and perfect sense, with one major exception. This was Levy… And she was saying she wanted to have a one-night stand.

None of that made any sense at all! Levy wasn't like that; she wasn't the type of girl who was just out for a good time. She was hard working, she was smart, she avoided conflict and trouble, and she was a good girl who wanted love, not just sex. At least as far as Lucy had always known. What the hell was going on?

"Levy…?" Lucy uttered out. "Do you understand what you're saying?"

"Yes Lucy…" Levy answered, her voice frustrated. "I'm saying I just want to have sex with someone, because I'm incredibly lonely and have given up on trying to find someone to be with. I've got way too much on my plate right now to try and be in a relationship anyways. I'm incredibly stressed out and in the meantime, it would just be nice to feel somewhat satisfied for once!" Levy suddenly ranted out, almost as if she was annoyed. "I know the risk and such. I'm not stupid, but don't you worry Lucy, because I'm not going to do it anyways! We both know I don't have it in me to actually do any of it!" Levy finished, her frustration peaking.

"Whoa hang on Levy! I don't-" Lucy started saying, but Levy held up a hand.

"Just stop, it's fine." Levy said, her voice going soft now, as she felt bad for getting so upset. "I understand you're just worried about me Lu, but I can take care of myself. I may say crazy things once in a while, but you know I'm not actually going to go through with any of my silly ideas." She said, her tone back to normal now and her large eyes shined at the blond with unshed tears and Lucy could see the hopelessness there in them. "I'm sorry… It's just we're here… And..." Levy said looking around with her hands open and out before they fell back to her sides. "We don't know anyone on this side of town and…" She looked back up to Lucy. "Well, you know, if I ever was going to do it… Here and now... This would be the time and place to go for it." Levy finished, her eyes looking off and then she began to laugh bitterly, leaving Lucy to just stare at her for a moment.

Lucy kind of felt guilty for judging Levy so harshly in that moment. Everything she was saying was really not all that crazy, for anyone else at least. Cana did that sort of thing on a regular basis. It was just that she had never expected to hear anything like that come from Levy's mouth. But… Alas there was a small part of her after hearing all of Levy's explanations, that kind of agreed. A hot one night didn't sound so bad right now… Even if she was sick of men.

"It's okay Levy." Lucy began, after a long pause as Levy still held the same bitter smile. "We could all stand to get some action a little more often." Lucy suddenly stated, making Levy now be the one to blink at Lucy. "And honestly, you're right!" The blond exclaimed as her hands went up. "We are in the right place to do it!" At this, the tension between the two of them was starting to ease, as she could see Levy starting to smile, her cute genuine smile. "I mean honestly, some time you and I ought to take a page from Cana's book, am I right? What the hell is that girl reading anyways?" Lucy added with a large grin on her face, finally earning a laugh from her smaller friend.

"I don't know, but I'm sure I've read it." Levy added jokingly and then they both began to laugh lightly this time. It was at this point, once Lucy's laughter died, that the blond began to glance around as if looking for someone.

"Say speaking of Cana… I wonder where she went off too?" The blond spoke, her words trailing off

"Oh yea!" Levy replied her head suddenly moving around as if she too was looking. "She's gotta be around here somewhere."

"Ya think maybe we should go look for her now?" Lucy asked. There was a long pause as Lucy waited for Levy's response, her chocolate eyes shifting around in search of their misplaced friend. "Levy…?" Lucy finally glanced up at Levy, as she realized the smaller girl wasn't listening to her anymore.

Levy was standing there, stone faced, her hazel eyes looking uneasy as her eyebrows pushed together in worry. Her head and eyes were darting around as if she was also searching for something and she was… She just wasn't sure what it was just yet. She had just had this odd feeling come over her that she couldn't quite explain, her chest felt heavy all of the sudden and Lucy was looking at her puzzled.

"Levy?" Lucy tried again, finally pulling the smaller girl's attention back towards her as she saw Levy's eyes land back on her. "You… alright?" Levy regarded Lucy with a blank expression and wide eyes. She wasn't exactly sure on how to answer the question, because she couldn't quite explain the odd feeling, that was suddenly coming over her, so she opted for just nodding her head instead.

"Yea." Levy lied curtly. "I'm fine. Just wondering where Cana is." She replied simply, as her eyes began to dart around the room once again. Lucy tilted her head and blinked, not fully believing her, because of the way Levy had been acting the whole entire night thus far. But then she quickly settled for not pushing the subject any further at the moment. Her concern for the missing Cana outweighing whatever it was that seem to be bugging Levy this time. Plus, Lucy didn't want to risk upsetting her again, now that Levy seemed to be feeling somewhat better. "Okay… Yea ya know what? I'll just find her and then maybe we can get going. What do ya say?" This finally seemed to get Levy's attention, as her eyes settled back on Lucy with a more serious look.

"You sure that's what you want?" Levy asked quickly, her eyes glancing upwards again. Lucy shot Levy another odd perplexed look, before just shrugging her shoulders and shaking her head.

"I don't know! I'm not having a whole lot of fun and I can tell…" Lucy's words began to trail off, as her brow lowered in confusion. Levy seemed to be staring at something, but what…? She didn't know. "You aren't." The blond uttered the last few words softly, causing Levy to glance down suspiciously. Lucy was then turning her head obviously, in an effort to look in the direction that her peculiar friend had been looking. She then looked back to Levy, with an eyebrow raised, after blatantly trying to see whatever it was, Levy had, had her eye on. "What is it?" Lucy finally staggered out in confusion. Levy matched her eyes, with Lucy's chocolate ones and then narrowed them.

"Not sure… Don't worry about it." Levy answered, this time not bothering to hide it.

"You seem worried though." Lucy stated and Levy just shook her head.

"No… I'm fine. Please don't end the night early on my account. It's not like we get to do this often." Levy spoke glancing back up at Lucy sympathetically. The blond rested her hands, on Levy's shoulders and she looked at her s sincerely.

"Levy, you can tell me what's up and I promise you it's fine." She said with a smile. "I'm actually just sorry Cana and I dragged you out here with us." This made Levy's eyes shift back down sadly again.

"No it's okay Lu… I think I'm done talking for one night anyways. Pretty sure I've done enough of that to you all week." Levy stated laughing awkwardly with a weak smile as Lucy let go of her shoulders and then let her hands slap back down to her own sides, as she rolled her eyes.

"Yea well, I kinda thought Cana would… Ya know… Hang out with us or something! Wish she had… Then maybe we would be having more fun, ya know?" She said, her voice dry, before she looked back up to Levy with one last weak smile. "Maybe I should go check the bar? That's where she said she was going. What if she's in trouble or something?" At this Levy just nodded in understanding.

"True, we really should try and find her. Maybe I'll go check the bathroom or something?" Levy asked, but Lucy just shook her head.

"Mmm…. Maybe you should just wait here." Lucy suggested, her arms going out to Levy. "Don't get me wrong. I just don't want to lose you in this crowd. This place is huge and you're so small… At least if you stay put I'll know where to find you."

"I get what you're saying… I'll just wait here then." Levy replied.

"Okay! I promise I won't be long." Lucy stated as she began to walk away leaving Levy to watch the blonde's retreating back, until the crowd swallowed her whole. "I'll be right back!" Was the last thing she could hear coming from Lucy's mouth.

As soon as Lucy was gone, Levy felt her whole-body heave as if she was letting out a breath she had been holding in for forever. Her eyes transfixed to the floor as the air left her lungs in a forlorn sigh, that left her feeling almost lifeless. This night had been a mistake. The whole thing was just one big mess and now all she felt was guilt, for spilling out all of her own frustrations with herself onto Lucy in the manner that she had. Especially when Lucy was going through her own troubles and it wasn't as if Levy hadn't already gotten her chance to vent to the blond. Hell, she had been ranting to Lucy all week about her issues, seeing as she wasn't on speaking terms with Jet and Droy; so then why again tonight, and about far worse things?

Levy was really wishing she could take back, what she said about the one nightstand. She had initially said it as a joke, but at the same time it was something that had been on her mind lately. Poking at her subconscious, every night when she went to bed, keeping her from finding sleep to the point where she would need to go find a book to read, just to exhaust herself further.

It hadn't been anything she planned on sharing with anyone, it was personal and she had originally planned on keeping it that way. But she had been too bold in making that joke, because Lucy knew her too well. Lucy had been able to read the sincerity behind it and so Levy had been caught. Thus, her frustrations came pouring out, successfully ruining what was supposed to be a fun night and making her poor heartbroken friend feel sorry for her. She hadn't been looking for sympathy, but she was just so sick of herself. She felt so lost when faced with the reality of her own situation, which was, that she was never brave enough to go after the things she truly wanted in life. That's what this all boiled down too and it was probably the whole reason why she was alone, or at least that's what she believed.

Levy had always been careful. Getting hurt in past relationships and experiencing great losses had only strengthened this trait about her. To the point that this carefulness she carried, seemed to crawl over into other aspects of her life as well. She was very aware of how unalike Lucy and Cana she was.

In her eyes, her two friends were more successful at taking charge of their own lives. Lucy was, by not allowing her dad to hinder her choices and Cana always did what she wanted, consequences be damned! She never let anything stop her from going after the things she wanted. Even when it was about getting the truth about her identity to her father.

Levy found these qualities in her friends admirable and she often wished she could be more like them, but she just didn't seem to have the same grit that they did. She was small and this small frame of hers was like a metaphor for the way she lived her life. Lost among the crowd, outshined and overshadowed by those who were bigger than her. Careful and modest, so that way she wouldn't misstep, because she couldn't withstand a fall like they could. She would end up shattering, where as they would stay intact and so she needed to be clever to get by. She always felt like she was reaching, struggling just to earn her place among all of the bigger people in the world.

Levy could feel these hopeless thoughts cascading around her small body, as her feet stood firmly on the club floor, large eyes still downcast. The emotions were taking hold of her heart, making her want to just crawl into a hole, but she stood there frozen, almost too afraid to budge.

Afraid? Her mind questioned the word… Or scared? That word was the true answer. It was the real reason why she was so stoic and careful. Why she could say crazy things, but not act upon them, even if she so desired it. She let fear rule her; she could feel it in the pit of her stomach, like a wave of darkness that overshadowed her whole being. It was the whole reason why she could suddenly feel her heart thumping hard against her ribcage; she could feel heat filling her cheeks, as her eyes widened. Her brain was manifesting the darkness that always hovered over her, on the wooden planks of the floor she was staring at.

There it was, personified, and literally hanging over her, swallowing her shadow into its own darkness. It was almost too perfect; to literally see the metaphor for how she always felt, performed before her very eyes. But how? How could it be? Levy started to raise a thin eyebrow. Am I going crazy? Her mind suddenly questioned, as she stared at the shadow on the floor and that was when she heard a voice.

Deep and dark, rough like heavy sandpaper and yet full of fortitude. It was the kind of voice that one could never forget once heard, and she had most definitely heard it. He made sure to keep his tone low, so that only she could hear him. Breathing the words out like a soft growl in her ear.

"Hey shrimp." It was his shadow that had engulfed hers, as he stood over her back. His large body slightly hunched over, so that his head was hovering just above her ear, creating a cold feeling within her, that ran down her spine as her large doe eyes went even larger.

No… She was thinking. How could he be here? That odd feeling, she had been having before Lucy disappeared to find Cana had returned, as she could suddenly feel that crushing weight on her chest once again. She knew what it was, that she had been looking for now. It was almost as if she had sensed him there, watching her and now here he was. And all Levy could think was, what does he want?

Look at him, look at me

That boy is bad

And honestly

He's a wolf in disguise

But I can stop staring in those evil eyes

I asked my girlfriend if she'd seen you round before

She mumbled something while we got down on the floor baby

We might've fucked not really sure, don't quite recall

But something tells me that I've seen him, yeah

That boy is a monster

M-M-M-Monster

That boy is a monster

M-M-M-Monster

That boy is a monster

M-M-M-Monster

Er-er-er-er

He ate my heart

(I love that girl)

He ate my heart

(Wanna talk to her, she's hot as hell)

He licked his lips

Said to me

Girl you look good enough to eat

Put his arms around me

Said "Boy now get your paws right off me"

I asked my girlfriend if she'd seen you round before

She mumbled something while we got down on the floor baby

We might've fucked not really sure, don't quite recall

But something tells me that I've seen him, yeah

That boy is a monster

M-M-M-Monster

That boy is a monster

M-M-M-Monster

That boy is a monster

M-M-M-Monster

Er-er-er-er

He ate my heart

(I love that girl)

He ate my heart

(Wanna talk to her, she's hot as hell)

He ate my heart

He ate my heart

Instead he's a monster in my bed

I wanna Just Dance

But he took me home instead

Uh oh! There was a monster in my bed

We French kissed on a subway train

He tore my clothes right off

He ate my heart then he ate my brain

Uh uh oh

(I love that girl)

(Wanna talk to her, she's hot as hell

That boy is a monster

M-m-m-monster

(Could I love him?)

That boy is a monster

M-m-m-monster

(Could I love him?)

That boy is a monster

M-m-m-monster

(Could I love him?)

That boy is a monster

Er-er-er-er

"Monster" by Lady Ga Ga - This is the song that inspired the story!

A/N: Please feel free to tell me what you think through review or PM. Please be constructive with criticism so I know how to improve and lastly, thank you for reading!