Disclaimer: I don´t own Detective Conan, I just play with the characters. No money is made here

I wish forever her great happiness

Every night in your dreams I see you, I feel you

Tears stood in her eyes Please don´t cry

Forever still for you, still for your love

(lyrics from "Still for your love" by Romania Montevideo)

~*~

"I´m sorry, but you mean nothing to me Ran."

The words rang in her ears. " I´m in love with someone, and don´t want to lie to you anymore. Sorry. We should end all these things, you know."

Shinichis voise kept cold, althought he wantet to cry, to tell her that it was all a lie, that he still loved just her and noone else, but it was impossible, and he knew it.

" By the way, I´m leaving tomorrow. Joining my parents in the States. I wanted to wish you luck for the future. Good bye Ran." Not waiting for an aswer he hung up.

"I´m so sorry Ran, so sorry, but you have to hate me, you have to forget about me. " He broke into tears. His whole world had broken during this call. His future with Ran, his luck, his entire life. But it was nessecarry to protect the person he loved most, it was nessecarry to make sure she was still alive.

He did not want to go home at the moment. It would cause to much pain, but on the other hand, it was his last chance to see her before the trip. With a rush he whiped away the tears, but they returned after seconds. "I´m so sorry, so sorry." he replied.

~*~

When Conan opened the door, the whole flat was dark. "Ran-neechan?" he shouted, hopeing to get a respons.

Suddenly someone switched on the light and Ran came out of the kitchen. Her eyes and face were red and she seemed tired.

"Ran-neechan? What has happened to you, you look so sad." The little boy tried to smile, but it was difficult.

"Conan-kun. I, I´m sorry, I forgot about supper. I´ll make you something." Not looking at him she went back to the kitchen.

~*~

Shinichi woke up, sweating.

What a nightmare.

He sat up trying not to think about it anymore, but it all came back to him immediately. He really had to do this. It was for Ran´s security. How terrible has his life turned out.

"Damn it, damn it, damn it!" he stood up and went ot the window. The glass reflected his face, no the face of Conan, the ltitle boy in whos body his mind was stuck. With a sigh he wet back to bed, hopeing that all these images would vanish.

~*~

With slow steps he walked towards the phonebox. This day had turned into a nightmare. Why had he to do this? "You will make it Shinichi!" he said to himseld. "It is for Ran´s secrurity."

With a sigh he entered the phonebox and dialed The Mouri´s number.

"Moshi moshi, this is the Mouri detective agency."

"It´s me Ran."

"Shinichi?"She replied.

"Ran, I have to talk to you."

"What´s wrong Shinichi? You sound so, so..."

"Please Ran listen. I have to tell you something. It´s just that you, you mean nothing to me." His voice broke. "Oh, why am I trying to fool myself." he suddenly said before Ran could aswer.

"This is so stupid. I love you Ran, I always did and I will always do, but my feelings will bring you into trouble." Shinichi was close to tears. "You have to forget about me. It´s best that you hate me Ran. You are the most important person in my life, I would die if someone would do you a harm. I...."

Suddenly Ran who was silent all the time interrupted him. "Shinichi, what does all this mean?" She sounded scared and angry at the same time.

"I can´t tell you Ran. I love you, but my prescence is dangerous for you. Don´t ask why. I just have to vanish from your life. If anyone asks, tell them that we had a terrible quarrel and that you don´t speak to me anymore. Please Ran. I wish that you will be happy, I want you to have a wonderfull life. I love you."

Not waiting for an answer he hung up.

~~~~~

He had been watching her for years, wainting for the day that would bring salvation.

~~~~~

"Where have you been so long?" The woman of about 25 looked angry. "Hanging around with this stupid chemist again?"

The man she was starring at seemed to be tired. He was about the same age as her and not very pleased with her arguing.

"If I would be your wife..."

"But you are not." he cut her. "I think I will not have supper with you Jennifer. I´m sorry but I don´t feel that good." With no more words he passed her, heading for his own room.

"Shiseki-kun! You have to eat something! Shiseki-kun!" but he did not reply.

~*~

Another day he had to live in this nightmare. Seven damned years had passed and nothing had changed. Of course he was his own age again, but did it matter? Did it really matter, now he was not allowed to see her?

Shiseki. He hated this name that was now his own.

With a sigh he looked out of the window. Why had this to happen? Why was he not able to go back and to be with her? But it was too late now. Shinichi took the letter out again.

"I´m sorry to tell you, but Ran is going to marry a man named Hideaki Oniwara. He is the son of Yusuke Oniwara, the owner of "Oniwara Electronics", the company Ran is working for. The wedding will take place in the Tokyo Palace Hotel."

He folded the letter and put it into his drawer. It was filled with letters that Shinichi got from Professor Agasa every week. Letters that kept him in touch with what was happening with Ran, letters that made him nearly cry everytime he red them. Shinichi closed the drawer.

"So you will be marrying in 4 months, Ran. I hope you will be happy:"

~*~

"Shiseki! There is a phonecall for you!" Jennifer shouted, hoping that he would hear her. They were living together for nearly 5 years now, but she did not know anything about him, but as time went by, she got used to it.

In the beginning she felt terribly in love with this mysterious Japanese boy whos seemed to be out of this world, but after some time she recognized that he had someone else in his minde. At this time Jennifer was happy, that she never had told him about her feelings. Now they were just sharing a flat, like so much of the other Students did.

Well, of course the time they were at university was over now, but somehow they kept living together, and she felt save, having him near her. Even if she was knowing that he had to hinde something. But she never asked.

"Shiseki!"

"I´m coming, I´m coming." She heard loud steps upon the stairs. "Who is it?" he asked as he eventually was standing next to her.

"It´s a woman. I think her name is Nagako or Nagiko perhaps."

"What?" He took the wireless phone out of her hand and ran up the stairs again.

"I will never understand this boy." Jennifer sighed.

~*~

"Nagiko?"

"Good Evening Kudou-kun." The woman replied.

"How are you?"

"Fine, fine, and you Na-chan?"

"Thanks, I´m fine too."

"There was a moment of silence.

"Nagiko, there has to be a reason you call. I know you, it´s impossible that you just call to ask me about how I feel."

"Of course there is a reason. I see you know me quite to well Shinichi- kun." She laughed. "Well, I have some news for you. From the MI6." She paused. "We have them. We´ve blown the whole lot. It´s over, everything is over. Shinichi? Shinichi? Do you hear me? Hello? Are you there?"

Shinichi nearly left the phone fall down. It was over, he was free and able to go home. No more hideing, no more fear that they could harm Ran, his parents or prof. Agasa.

"I´m here Nagiko-kun. It´s, it´s, oh it´s so wonderfull. I thank you so much."

"I promised you we would make it."

Suddenly Shnichi turned back. Nagiko was standing behinde him with her mobile. The window was open. She switched it off and smiled at him.

"You should have shut the window, you fool. What if I would be from the black organization. You would be too easy to catch." She began to laugh. "You can shut your mouth Shinichi-kun."

"Na-chan, you are so.."

"I know. Well, I just had to come here in person. What a pity I forgot about the camera. Your expression was fantastic."

"Na-chan!"

"I know, I know."

He knew Noagiko for seven years now. She was prof. Agasas assistant, a MI6 agent and another victim of the APTX. They worked together to find a cure for the poison and soon became good freinds, even if she was 10 years older than him.

"So it is really true?"

"Yes finally we got them. I think you can go back to Japan now. As Shnichi Kudou."

"This is just fanastic..." Suddenly his smile faded away.

"What´s wrong Shinichi?" Nagiko looked at him with wonder.

"It´s because of Ran. She is going to marry in 3 days."

"What?"

"Yes, some guy who´s father owns a software-company."

"Damn it. I´m so sorry for you."

Shinichi sighted. "I think seven years have been too much. I understand her. I just hope she will be happy."

"Mhm... I think that you should go and see her. Whish her luck. In person I mean."

"What? Are you crazy? She would kill me. Na-chan, I vanished from her life. I made her cry, you know that. I don´t want to do it again."

"But I know you. You love her, and you would hate yourself the rest of your life if you would not see her before the wedding."

"I, I don´t know."

Nagiko looked angry at him. "But I know. I will get us some tickets. Pack your things."

"Na-chan!"

"No more words, or do I have to use some Karate?"

Not answering Shinichi turned towards his locker.

~*~

"You look so beautyfull Ran."

"Do you think Sonoko?" Ran went towards the mirror. "Well, I don´t know."

"Oh Ran, it´s your wedding day. You should be happy. This is the beginning of your future."

Ran sat down and sighted. "I know, but this is stupid. I mean I don´t love him. I barely know him. This is jus one of these ´what´s the best for the company´ weddings. I have seen him only a few times. Even my father does not like him."

"Ran, please, you should think more positive."

"I even don´t know his favourite color." Ran began to cry.

"Shhht, please, Ran. It will all be just fine. You will see. You are going to have a wondefull husbad and a wondefull life. You will see."

"But I don´t love him. I love.. Oh forget it. I hate this day, I want to die."

"You will make it Ran. Dont´think like that. Oh, what shall I do with you." Sonoko got up. "Just look into the mirror. You are such a beautyfull bride." She took a hankerchief ot of her bag and swept away Ran´s tears.

~*~

"Damn it Shinichi! Hurry up!"

"Na-chan, please." Nagiko looked at him with anger. "No more words. Now come on. I´m sure she will not kill you."

"Are you sure? I mean, you know her! And I have the feeling that I´m going to ruin her wedding."

"Shinichi. Shut up and go!" Without words Shinichi went up the stairs of the building. Why had this girl to be one of the best agents the MI6 had?

~*~

"Now you are looking perfect again." Sonoko put the little mirror down, She had done great work with the make-up. There were no more signs of tears on Ran´s face. "Now try to smile."

"Thank you Sonoko. What would I do without you."

"Dunno, maybe you would still..." Suddenly someone knocked on the door. "Yes?"

One of the employees entered the room. "Miss Suzuki? There is some trouble with the catering."

"I come." She stood up. "I´ll be back soon Ran. O.k?"

"Mhm." Her friend nodded and Sonoko followed the woman out.

~*~

"Damn it." Ran said to herself. This was really the most terrible day in her life. There had always been only one person she wanted to marry, and this person was Shinichi.

"Damn it, damn it, damn it!" She lend back. This day could only get worse.

"You look beautyfull as a bride. This Oiwara should be lucky to marry such a wonderfull girl." Ran turned immediately and saw a man standing near the door. He was dressed in black, smileing tiredly, looking at her in facination.

"This is not possible..." she began. "Shinichi, is that you?"

The man did not answer.

"Seven damned years, and you still have the courage to turn up. Especially on my wedding-day. How dare you!" She started to shout and withhim some seconds she slapped him across the face.

Shinichi did not move.

"Say something you bastard! Talk to me!" Ran starred at him furiously. "TALK TO ME!"

"I´m sorry Ran. I did not want to ruin your great day." He turned and went towards the door.

"Do not move, or I will kill you! First you vanish for seven years, and now that you are back you simply walk away? Do you think this makes me happy? Do you think you can come and go whenever you want to? I want an explanation!"

Shinichi stopped. "I, I... I am really sorry Ran. I mean it. But I could not act any other way. You would have been in danger. It was the only way I could be sure you will stay alive. I kept informing myself about your life the whole years, knowing that this day would come. The day you really would forget about me. I came to say good bye, and to let you know, that I will always love you. No matter what will happen."

Ran looked down. "Shinichi, this is my weddingday."

"I know, and I am no more a part of your life. I only wanted to see you this last time. Promise me, that you will be happy." With these word he ran out of the room.

~*~

Ran sat down. No this was all just a dream. It could not be real. Shinichi was gone, this man she´ve seen was just her imagination. She was halluzinating about him because the depressions this day brought. Suddenly someone knocked on the door.

"Yes?" The door opened slowly.

" Happy weddingday Ran-chan." Nagiko was holding a big bunch of flowers in her hands. "I´ve always known you would be a beautyfull bride."

Ran looked at her in astonishment. "Ayanami? Is this really you?" Nagiko smiled. It was long ago since someone has called her Ayanami. It was the name, she used during the time she was shrunken and Ran´s classmate. She was the only person who decided not to take the antidote and stay younger. For her it was easy, she had been transformd froma 27 year old woman into a 17 year old teenager..

"Did you think I would miss to congratulate you? By the way, thank you for the invitation."

"You, you are welcome, I always hoped for you to appear, but I never thought you would really come." Ran stood up and huged her friend. "I was afraid you would be too bussy."

"Ran-chan, to bussy for your wedding? Now come on, I promised you over seven years ago that I would come. But..." She paused. "But I always thought, that you would marry Kudou-kun."

Ran looked down, not able to see into Nagiko´s eyes. "Well, you know what has happened..."

"I know. And I think I know better than you think." She smiled. "By the way, where is he? I saw him in the hall, but he was gone before I could talk to him."

"He is here?" Suddenly Ran´s voice became louder. "So it was really him. It was not just... Oh damn it. This bloody..." she whispered to herself.

"I think I should leave now. The wedding is going to start in some minutes." Nagiko said.

"Oh, oh yes sure. I hope you´ll stay for the party afterwards."

"I´ll do." With these word Nagiko left the room.

~*~

She was nowhere to find. Ran´s eyes wandered trough the crowd again and again. Ayanami was not with the guest. ´And she promised to come´ Ran thought.

"Do you, Ran Mouri..." The words flew past her. "Till death do you depart?"

Ran looked into the face of the preecher. Sudeenly the feeling she has had for such a long time grew bigger and bigger. It was too late, there was no chance to change it.

"No." There was asilence. "No." she repeted. "I´m sorry, but I can´t do this."

She turned on her heel and ran out of the church, faster and faster, not looking back, when suddenly a hand touched her shoulder. Like a reflex Ran tryed to use a karategrip, but she was stopped by a siple touch.

"It is me Ran." Nagiko was smiling at the young nearly-bride. "Somehow I knew it would turn this way. Come on."

Ran followed her to a car, not saying a thing. "Somehow I think I know where to drive you to."

~*~

There was a long silence in the car. Ran was starring out of the window, not believing what she had done.

"Did you love him?" With these words Nagiko broke the silence.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, did you love this Oiwara, Ran-chan? I know you, you would not flee from your weddingday if there was no reason"

Ran looked at her.

"No. It was arranged by the company. I saw him four times, maybe five, but this was all."

"I see. Shinichi was right that he would ruin you wedding, but somehow I think it was the best thing he could do."

"Shinichi was right? What do you mean? Did you see him? Did you talk to him?"

Eventually Nagiko looked at Ran with a serious face. "Listen to me Ran, I will tell you something, something important that will explain nearly everything to you. But don´t ask anything untill I have finished. It may seem very bizzar to you, but you don´t need to be afraid."

She took a breath. "Well, yes I´ve talked to Shinichi, but I will start at the beginning. When Shinichi rang you, seven years ago, he had to tell you that he is in love with someone, to make you hate him. But he was not really able to do it, he loved you too much, so he left you with the note, that you should forget him and tell everyone you hate him. This was nessecary to protect you. When you two were in this amusement park, he saw something he should not have. A money-transfer done by the so-called "Black Organization", these guys saw him, and tried to kill him. They did not succes, but Shinichi had to hide. That´s why you did not see him for so long. After some time, they nearly got him, he could escape but it was clear that now it was too dangerous for him to stay in Japan. And it was too dangerous for you. If these men would have got to know how much you mean to him, they would kill you, to hurt him. Shinichi was in the States, using a faux name for seven years, not able to come back, for it would propably mean your death. Do not wonder where I know it all from. Shinichi will explain it to you. But there is one thing you should know. He still loves you Ran. Did you know, that he did not have any other girlfriend since he left Japan?"

Ran looked at Nagiko not knowing what to say. This was all too much for her.

"Where are we going to?" She finally asked."

"You know it Ran. Don´t you"

~*~

A/N: Tried to change the formating and hope it is better now. I also rewrote some little things. Sorry for the mistakes, English is not my maternal language. Little P.S: I´m looking for a beta, so if anybody would be so kind to try, I would be very thankfull.